Met Regret

"Haah…" I yawned.

A lot of things happened yesterday. To think that a murder happen in my first day. And to see the boss' scary side of him. And when I went back down, my fellow workers asked me a bunch of questions. Furthermore, Noki apologized to me about giving the task to me. Then I went back to work. And that's how my first day ended. What a rough day.

"Now, enough remembering those." I said it to myself.

I got up, then went to the bathroom, took a shower, then went to the canteen to eat breakfast likewise no one else was around in the canteen except the people who were assigned to cook this day. After eating, I went to the living room to rest.

The size of the living room equals the size of the guest room. It has a TV, 6 couches that formed in 2 rows like an u-shape facing towards the TV, and in the middle of the u-shape couch was a table.

When I entered the room, someone was there sitting on the couch.

"Morning."

"Good morning."

It was Clara. I met her yesterday. She's one of the fellow workers who asked me some details about the incident. Plus, she is friends with the victim.

"How are you?" I asked her after sitting on the couch.

"I'm fine. But Claire... she cried the whole night yesterday, so she takes a day off today. Right now, she's in our room."

Claire, I met her the same way I met Clara. She's friends with Clara and the victim too.

"What about you?" I asked her.

"I will continue to work. I just finished breakfast just a while ago."

"Are you sure you're fine to work just like that?"

"Yeah… I'm fine."

"...you were crying yesterday, you know."

"..."

She became silent and made a sad expression.

"You know, …originally, Lilith and Claire were the only two of them who were friends in the first place." She suddenly spoke.

"What do you mean?"

"At first, I was supposed to hate Lilith back then. Back in high school, I had a crush, but that boy was always talking to her. So I hated her so much that I decided to bully her. At first, bullying her was working, she started avoiding the boy. But the boy keeps talking to her. Because of that, I made bullying become harsher, to the point that I hired guys to r*pe her. But that idea backfired on me. When the day came to abduct Lilith because Claire was always with her, she got abducted as well. I talked to Lilith the reason before they got r*pe, but the guys I hired didn't follow my plan. They decided to r*pe me as well, a guy rip off my clothes one by one. And those when Lilith awakened her ability. Her ability is wind manipulation. That day, she killed the guys by manipulating the wind around the room and sending it to them. The guys got slashed. After the guys died, I thought that the two of them would walk away and ignore me, but they lent me a hand instead. I'm really grateful because of her I got saved. Even though…--" She starts crying. "Even though I did something bad to her, she still showed kindness to me." She looked at me with tears in her eyes, then cried at my chest. "She even befriended me. All this time I didn't repay her. I want to atone my sins, but now she's dead without me doing anything at all. I'm not worthy to be friends with her."

She was still clinging to my chest, crying so loud out. So I stroked her hair and said, "Don't think like that. Lilith will be sad if she sees you like that." to comfort her.

"B-but I can't…--"

"I don't know what kind of person she was… but I think she would say it's not your fault."

"..."

"Listen here. We couldn't bring people back to life, it's the same as grieving as well. I know we can't ignore crying out for our dead loved ones, but we can't just keep grieving, so we need time to accept it."

"But what about my sin, my regret? How can I repay her now?"

"It's not needed."

"Ha?"

"She already forgave you."

She holds my shirt with her both hands and pulls me forcefully, then said. "How can you know!? You don't even know her."

"She befriended you, right? That regret you have right now is already enough for her to forgive you. You guys got this far, right? And you guys were still friends. Means she already accepted you."

"..."

She suddenly stood up.

"I guess I should take a day off today." She said, then went to the door. Before leaving, she says, "Thank you." then left afterwards.

After she left, I started to have deep thoughts.

"Regret ha… I wonder what I felt back then?"

Now I start wondering what I felt back then when my parents died. I can't seem to remember it. The only memories I have, me having an emotional death was when grandma died. The feeling of sorrow was engraved to me.

"I wonder how Hannah has been lately?"

Sin… I regret what I did to Hannah. I was a scum back then, doing something to her and dumping her just like that. I didn't even apologize to her. I really hate myself.

"Someday I will properly apologize to her."

To be honest I'm really jealous of Clara. That she's been forgiven.

Now I have another regret. Regret of not knowing anything about that situation back then at that room. I can't save her at all.

"I really hate myself…"

______________________

AFTER CLARA LEFT THE ROOM

She went to the boss to request a day off. And the boss approves it. Now she went back to her room. After returning, she sat beside Claire on the bed while Claire was laying.

"Leave me alone for now." Claire spoke.

"I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"For everything. In the end, I didn't repay you guys for something. I couldn't save her."

Suddenly, Claire slapped Clara and said, "Are you seriously saying that right now?"

"Sorry..."

Then suddenly, Claire hugged Clara.

"It's already in the past. And I'm always the one getting helped, so I'm supposed to be the one to repay you guys." Claire said.

________________________

BACK TO SHIN

After resting, I head back to my room and change into my uniform, then head down to start working.

" "Good morning." " Lucas and Sam greeted me.

"Morning. It seems you guys are having a conversation. And it seems there are fewer guests today."

"Yea, we're talking about that." Lucas said.

"Many guests were leaving." Sam said.

"Is it because of the incident yesterday?" I asked.

"It seems so." Sam said.

"You're really unlucky." Lucas said to me.

"Unlucky? Why?" I asked.

"This is the first time that happened. And you're the one who witnessed it."

While we're talking, Ms. Alice calls me, "Shin, can we talk for a second?"

"Sure, Ms. Alice. Sorry guys, it seems Ms. Alice has something to say to me."

"It's ok." Lucas said.

Ms. Alice and I walk far away from them.

"What did you want to talk about, Ms. Alice?" I asked.

"Here."

Ms. Alice handed me a paper.

"What's this?" I asked.

"That's your fake identity. That will be your data if someone asks you or investigates."

I realized quickly. The paper she gave me was my fake identity. If someone asks me about my info, this will be the one I'm using. And to use for Imperium.

"I understood." I said.

"Then that's all." Then she left.

After Ms. Alice left, I went back to Lucas and Sam.

"What do you guys talk about?" Lucas asked.

"She just gave me this." I replied.

"Fake identity?" Sam spoke.

"Yep."

"Let me see."

I gave the paper to her.

"Hmm… Name: Shin Armstrong, Age: 20. This age, is it your true age?"

"Nope, I'm 16."

"16! You're young? I'm 20 yrs old."

"Real age?"

"Yes."

!?

To think I had sex to a 4 years older than me.

"I'm 24 yrs old, real age. But anyway, it's surprising you're calm after talking to Alice." Lucas said.

"Why?" I asked.

"Alice hates men. It's surprising that you can withstand her menacing glare."

"Glare? She didn't do anything to me in particular."

"Whoa, it's astounding."

"Or it's just because I'm new?"

"No, no, when I'm new, she definitely gave me a menacing look."

"Is it the same to you too, Sam?" I asked her.

"No, she only does that to men." She replied.

"But why does she hate men?"

"We don't exactly know. Her past was really hidden. Only the boss knows." Lucas replied.

Ms. Alice past ha… I wonder what it is.