90 Yeah, I don't think it is.

Stopping myself from escalating things any further took every last ounce of my waning self-control. And even then, it only happened because I felt the car finally stop. We arrived.

A rational part of me took back control over my body from the Beast. It wasn't an easy fit, and I wasn't completely sure if that's what I truly wanted in this situation. And the fact that Claire wasn't exactly looking all that opposed to the escalation of our current activities made it even harder.

I took a deep breath, slowly exhaling, trying to calm myself completely. Which I failed. The Beast was still there, lurking in the shadows of my racing thoughts, waiting for another chance.

But I gave her my word. And breaking a promise, even once, would be that first misstep on a slippery slope that led me down in my first run

Against my better judgment, I turned my eyes toward Claire, meeting her own gaze. The Counter Girl was watching me with a mixed expression on her cute face. A bit of uncertainty, surprise, and a healthy dose of lust...

Breaking this line of thought, I looked at my watch. There were about fifteen more minutes before the show would start. Just enough for my date to calm herself down and straighten her attire.

Yes, during our earlier exercise, my hands explored quite a bit of Claire's body, avoiding parts that were too intimate. Which led to the current state of her dress. Mm, what a nice choice of underwear...

Ah, I was certainly looking forward to the end of our date.

With this thought, I finally left the car, giving Counter Girl some much-needed space.

***

The show itself went pretty uneventful.

The tickets that my date's friend got were for pretty good seats. Alas, they weren't for some sort of personal lounge or a balcony, cutting away my chances to get a bit more acquainted with what was under Claire's dress.

Maybe it was for the best.

As for the musical, it was an age-old classic. A love story between the youngsters from opposing families that ended up in tragedy due to circumstances and happenstances. I couldn't say that I liked it very much, though, I guess, the production was on a very high level.

My date certainly enjoyed herself, so I had no complaints.

As for myself, I spent those three hours thinking about various questions that had been crowding inside my skull since our ride here.

Why would someone like Counter Girl agree to all of this?

I could guess a bit about the full extent of Olivia's motivations, and they made quite a bit of sense to me. Not completely and not without a pinch of salt, but they did.

Bella's behavior made even more sense, in large part because I knew her so well. My special woman was playing along with my bullshit since she had nothing to lose with this arrangement. Oh, of course I didn't buy her accepting it so easily, but, at the end of the day, she knew that she would keep her position in my life intact either way.

But what about Claire? She was neither as materialistic and goal-oriented as Olivia was trying to make herself look, nor was she an adulterous, lustful bitch that appreciated beautiful girls about as much as me, like Bella.

What a mystery! How interesting, indeed.

***

"Um, Tian?" I heard a voice calling me out.

... and I blanked once again, or so it seemed.

"Oh, yes, I'm sorry, I just..." I was trying to make up an excuse, but I caught myself in the middle of my words instead. "I am blanking out again, sorry."

I looked at Claire, and she looked at me with an obvious worry in her eyes. Wrong kind of worry. Counter Girl wasn't worried about me losing control; she actually seemed worried about my well-being.

We were already in the car, although I wasn't certain how much time we spent just sitting there. How embarrassing.

"Are you feeling fine?" Her question made me shake my head.

"More than fine, in fact, but I appreciate your concern," I responded with as much confidence as I could muster. If only I could make myself believe those words as well.

A momentary pause followed, as my date was looking me straight in the eyes. And I met her gaze, for the most part, since I needed something to focus on to distract the fucking animal.

He was there, the long-since familiar sign of my stupid ass getting into some deep trouble.

The Beast. Speaking frankly, it was the worst part of myself, which doubled as the most troublesome at the same time.

Gigolo got me into plenty of situations over the course of my first run, yes. But he knew how to avoid crossing lines that shouldn't be crossed.

The Professional was a man on a mission, rational to a fault. Borderline unfeeling. Ideal for my line of work, but incredibly troubling for personal life.

And Boredom, well, that was everything else. The complete apathy, which led me to the ultimate outcome. Something that the three above tried to push back in every way possible.

And a thought crossed my mind, once again: they were all a part of me.

"Um, Tian?" Claire's voice reached my ears again.

Ah, no good; another blank like that could very well lead me to fast-forward into the next morning. Or a week later. Been there, done that in my first run.

"Tian?" The concern in Counter Girl's voice had become even more apparent; she even put her hand on my shoulder, shaking me gently.

"Claire, I just can't decide if you are incredibly brave or completely stupid," I said, smiling at her.

This wasn't a good smile; the way she had stiffened there for a moment made it plenty obvious. A moment later, my date blushed and lowered her gaze.

"I, um, well, my friend and I had made a reservation in a restaurant. And I wanted to ask if we should go there, but, um, I see it's not a good idea, isn't it?" I almost applauded after hearing these words.

Attagirl. It seemed like my lessons finally made her cultivate some common sense.

"Yeah, I don't think it is," I agreed.

"So, um…" She paused for a moment here, still refusing to raise her eyes. "Well, I mean, we can just skip it and go to your place."

I questioned my not-quite-stellar sanity for a moment there.

"Claire…"

I was about to ask her to repeat those words in case I misheard them somehow, but I was interrupted by the sound of her ringtone.

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