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Screw the force, I have money! [Star wars SI]

Being thrown into SW universe in time before the Blockade of Naboo, our MC finds many ways how to derail the timeline and break all breaks and directing everything into the unknown. Follow the story of our hero, of how he kriffed up the galaxy. "I will be updating this novel from the forums once a month(if there is any), so don't complain if there is nothing to read, I'm as big of a reader as any of you are XP" This novel I bring to you from forums that not so many had visited and it's hard to find constantly updated stories. Forum stories of origin: https://forums.spacebattles.com/threads/screw-the-force-i-have-money-star-wars-si.649535/reader/ All right for star wars and etc are reserved by their respected owned, this is work of fanfiction and made by [QuickDeath007] Author!!!

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30 Chs

Wrath of the Outer Rim : Episode III

Sylee watched as her master, completely under the sway of alcohol, laughed uproariously at the Neimoidian's drunken tale. Sylee didn't hold a particularly high opinion of her master, but in this particular instance, getting drunk and exchanging stories with a hostage was a new low.

"S-so, so... here I am, having led Will and... and Sammy half way up this cliff, having convinced them I knew what I was doing... and Sammy gets stuck. I, I try to encourage her n all, but... nope. She's done. Then Will gets stuck. Finally, I realize they might actually be stuck, and not... yanno... losing their nerve `n shit. So I-I try to go back down and help `em. Then I realize... I'm stuck. Couldn't move cause all the rocks were comin` loose an` Imma moron who don't know what he's doin`."

Hondo Ohnaka burst into a fresh wave of laughter, clapping Montoo on the back.

"No no, `m not done yet. See, see... then Will suddenly realizes `e's smarter `n all of us, and calls for rescue. So the... the uh... fire brigade gets there in a bunch`a crawlers `n an airspeeder. S-so these rural bumpkins figure I'm the one closest to fallin`, `n decide to try n get me with the speeder first... `n I tell `em, nah, get the others first. But no, they have a guy go down from the speeder on a rappel, and get me in a harness... but wait, we're right next to a cliff. They, they start liftin`, and the rope's swayin`, and me n the rescue guy keep getting smashed against the cliff, and I have to keep kickin` off with my foot to stop us from getting grinded against the rocks as we go up. Cause the harness guy had put in his two weeks or somethin`, I guess."

"S-so finally, we all get down, we're all back at the campsite, the... the academy teacher, she's reminding us that we're all stupid, and the fuckin` local news assholes show up. Slow news day, I guess. This fuckin` asshole keeps tryin` to get an interview with everyone, and everyone, me, the other students, the teacher, the fire brigade, we're all blowin him off... and we're walkin` away from him, fuck, Will's running from him... and the dipshit chases us for a good five minutes before he gives up. Doesn't even get the name of our academy."

"Then, then we're all packing into the academy speeder to go home... when another fuckin` news reporter comes up. Catches the teacher as she's gettin` in, asks her for an interview, teacher says no. Then she asks, 'wouldn't you like to thank the fire brigade for saving your students?' And the teacher, that beautiful woman, my fuckin` hero, looks the reporter in the eye, sweet as can be, an-and she says, 'I will, in person.'"

Hondo managed to spill his drink while laughing. He wrapped an arm around Montoo's shoulders in a friendly, drunken embrace. "Oh, I like you, Captain. So I tell you what I'm going to do... when this is allll over, and I have my money... I give you my precious Sylee! You take her home, you have fun, yes?"

Montoo's smile faded a little bit, confused. "I mean, I... she's pretty, but... you sure? You, you probably won't like what I do with her... and I don't want you sobering up and realizing I made off with her."

Hondo shook Montoo slightly as he laughed. "This is why I like you! So considerate! So honest! And not the, 'oh piracy is so terrible, why do you do this,' honest, no... you the kind of man who see he has made a mistake, and fixes it. Do not worry about me regretting this, my good captain, even if I do, I do not blame other men for when I drink too much!"

"Ah! A fellow honest man," Montoo exclaimed.

"Ha! This man understands! We are like family! Besides, she tried to poison my drink last night. I would have had to kill her otherwise. I hear you Neimoidians have some interesting tricks for dealing with unruly slaves, maybe you do better, yes?"

"Maybe..."

-----

Madeen kicked Hondo in the back of his leg, forcing him to his knees. The former pirate captain slowly cast his gaze over the ruined remnants of his lair, the corpses of his crew spread across the bar where they lounged in between raids.

"Ha... I suppose there are worse ways to go. Shot between the eyes by a vengeful woman... if only two of us were naked and in bed, yes? It would be quite a story to tell, in the next life."

Sylee felt her lip twitch involuntarily. He had not been a pleasant man by any means, but he had a way of getting a chuckle out of everyone at least once.

"He warned you, Hondo. He told you that you wouldn't like what he'd do with me."

Hondo's smile faded, replaced by a confused frown. Realization dawned. "Sylee? Ahhhh... I suppose I do have a tale to tell then."

-----

Sylee woke up, the memory of her blaster's bark still ringing in her ear. She didn't like visiting Ryloth... the dreams always started back up when she did.

Originates from

https://forums.spacebattles.com/threads/screw-the-force-i-have-money-star-wars-si.649535/reader/page-2

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