34 ch 34

"Horcrux."

The memory blurred as a man started shouting. I couldn't concentrate on the memory, on account that I was shoved out of the pensieve and was now on my back in Dumbledore's office.

My head felt like it was being split open, just at the mention of the word.

Horcrux. I thought, trying to find the source of discomfort.

It was there, on the edge of my mind, but it wouldn't come to me. I knew the term, I knew what it was, I was familiar with it. But I couldn't grasp the concept, or it's significance.

I'm missing something. My mind told itself.

"What are you missing, Ron?"

I opened my eyes. When had I closed them? And realized I was on my knees, not my back like before. I couldn't see anything.

"What the fuck is going on?!"

Just like that, it was like an explosion happened in my mind and magic. My magic was as uncontrolled as it had ever been. It ran like a torrent under my skin and lashed out at the world around me. I tried, and failed to get a hold of myself. I only imagined what was happening to the world around me.

The piercing cry of a phoenix broke through to me.

"Occlumency!"

The word pierced the chaos in my mind and magic, and I went through the exercises that I beat into myself so many times. My breathing evened out first, and I used that to pace myself. In, out, in out. Then my shields fell back into their normal place around my mind. Finally I wrenched my magic into control with the brute force of my mind.

Suddenly I could see my surroundings, and it was a mess. The contents of Dumbledore's office was strewn about. A lot of it was broken or shattered, laying on the ground. Harry sat on his ass with his wand in his hand. There was a cut on his face, and his robes looked tattered.

Dumbledore kneeled in front of me, with the Elder Wand ready to go. He looked immaculate as ever, not showing the signs of whatever the fuck just happened like Harry did.

I shot to my feet just as Harry decided to cut in. "What the bloody hell was that Ron?"

I looked around at the carnage in the room and my wand whipped into my hand. A quick jab, and it started to put itself back together. In less than ten seconds, the room looked like it had before my episode.

"I don't know." I answered Harry honestly.

"You said you're missing something." Dumbledore cut in.

Memories, I'm missing memories. But I can't tell you that. I thought to myself, and didn't dare speak the words.

"I need the book, Headmaster." I told him, ignoring his statement.

"That is the last thing you need, my boy." Dumbledore's denial was swift and unforgiving.

I walked over to the seat in front of the desk and sat down. I slumped in the chair, letting it hold my weight.

"The mind palace allows you to walk your mind, doesn't it, Headmaster?" I asked him. Although the book never explicitly said it, it did imply it.

"Not only that, Ron. It allows you to alter your very being, your very soul." Dumbledore answered me.

"Something already has!" I snapped. "There is a part of me locked in there!" I ended the sentence with a finger jabbing at my temple. "I need it, I can feel that it's the answer to all of this." My arms made a wide motion, symbolizing everything.

"Is that what you're missing?" Dumbledore asked, bringing it back to my episode.

"Yes, it's always been there, but I haven't been able to access it." I lied. It had only been there since the 'merge'. A remnant of my last life, locked away by something.

What is powerful enough, to cause me to lose control like that. It felt like my mind unraveled. I pondered.

"I have returned the book to its owner." Dumbledore said as he passed me to sit in his seat. His words fell like jackhammers tonight.

"It's owner." Harry said, suddenly interested in the conversation.

"The man who brought the world to its knees." I couldn't help it, the words just slipped out. "Both muggle and magical."

"Grindelwald." Harry finished my statement for me. He had read the book multiple times also, and seen the name at the bottom.

"Yes." Dumbledore confirmed.

I had never actually thought that Dumbledore would do that, even though it makes sense. Nurmengard was built by Grindelwald to be the most impenetrable prison ever built. It served as his and his followers base of operations during the war. Some expected him to eventually build a school there also, to further his influence.

The prison only made up a small portion of the castle. A single tower, rising into the sky, higher than any before it. Although, muggle skyscrapers might eclipse it now. Grindelwald sat at the very top, in the penthouse designed for Albus Dumbledore.

"Is it a test, or a lesson for me. You want me to see what happens if I lose myself?" Normally I would have kept the words inside, but the events during the memory of Tom Riddle and Slughorn had taken its toll on me.

"You see through me." Dumbledore confirmed.

"Fucking hell." I muttered quietly.

I knew that the old man was loving it. So I refused to allow him to gloat in his genius. Instead I changed the topic.

"Harry, that last memory was a fake, did you notice how fuzzy it was and then it ended. Clear sign of an unaccomplished occlumens." I said.

"You sure you can talk about this subject?" Harry asked, referencing my episode from earlier. His emerald eyes pierced into mine. Dumbledore was wondering the same thing, if his own stare was any indication.

"Yes, I'll be fine." I told him. I wasn't actually sure if I was lying or not, only time would tell.

"Hmph." Harry replied snarkily.

"You are, of course, correct." Dumbledore said, progressing the conversation. "Horace has hidden the memory from me for a long time, and I need you to retrieve it Harry."

"Easy enough." Harry said nodding at the old man, extremely confident. "The man loves me. I'll get it one way or the other."

That sounds ominous, and awesome. I thought as I processed Harry's words. I hope he means by force if necessary.

It was no secret that Harry was the better legilimens between the two of us. I personally thought that it was because of his Voldy traits that allowed him to surpass me in that particular field, but his work ethic at it couldn't be denied either.

Dumbledore, being the forgiving old man he was, didn't really like the potential harm against his old friend.

"Let's hope it doesn't come to that."

"Neither of us benefit from this anymore." Snape's voice cut through the air as we finished our duel.

It was true. If we stood still, and limited ourselves to non-lethal spells, then we would just trade clever uses of shields and spells for hours. It no longer served any purpose. Although I can say that I had learned a tremendous amount about how much I relied on moving during my duels. This exercise forced me to take every opportunity to attack, when it was given. It also improved the efficiency of my reading beginning wand movements to properly counter them.

"No we don't." I agreed with the man. "But I do have something I would ask of you." I took the opportunity our now free Sunday provided, and worked up the courage to ask him. Snape turned to me and raised an eyebrow, waiting for me to elaborate.

"I find myself needing to reach a very tall place, and I don't like brooms." I said. He knew where I was going with it. "Unaided flight." I elaborated.

"How are you sure that I know such advanced magic?" Snape asked.

I mentally panicked for a moment as I realized that he might have never showcased his ability yet. I beat the panic back, unwilling to let it deter me from the path.

"A very reliable source." I told him. He'll assume it was Nott. I thought knowing that Snape had dropped the notebook off and it had been activated. I had yet to spark conversation with my mole, though Snape didn't need to know that.

Snape nodded at me. "It just so happens that I do have the knowledge."

"What would you like in exchange?" I asked him, trying to get to the meat and potatoes of the conversation.

"You're reliable source and I had a very thorough discussion the other day. We found that we are more alike than previously thought." Snape said.

I laughed at Snapes equivalent to a joke. He was basically telling me that him and Nott now both knew of each other and were in contact, while sharing some camaraderie.

"We decided to pick each other's brains for a moment, eventually coming to an arrangement. He asked for a specific potion in exchange for whatever I wanted. I, of course, asked for the source of his, and yours, dueling talent." Snape continued, and a grin grew on his face.

My heart dropped. Fuck. I thought, knowing what was coming.

"He told me the name of two books, I should consider procuring. 'A Beginners Guide to Casting For the Learned' and 'The Road to Legendary Casting'. Imagine my surprise when I find absolutely zero knowledge of its existence from even the most esoteric of collectors." Snape finished, waiting for me to continue.

I just stared at him, mentally imagining the beating I was going to give dear Theodore Nott, for his loose tongue. So I need to give two of Grindelwald's books away, to be able to procure another. I pondered.

I don't know why I am even hesitating. I need the ritual for the mind palace. I decided resolutely.

My right hand reached into my robes and grabbed the shrunken trunk inside one of my many pockets. I enlarged it quickly, and turned a knob on the front of it, the one I knew would give me access to the library. I opened it up and waved my wand.

The books flew out of the open lid and into my open hand. I quickly closed my trunk before shrinking it and putting it back into my robes. I offered the books in my hand to the man in front of me without a word.

"Just like that?" Snape asked, surprised.

"Well, I had to practice on something to develop my BlackBook. Making copies of books with runes was one of the first steps along the way to achieving my masterpiece." I told him, revealing that he didn't actually have the original copy of the book.

I had taken to carrying all of Grindelwalds books, along with my elemental book and some of the other important ones from the Black Library in my truck when it was revealed that Dumbledore had hidden 'The Mind Arts' from me at the beginning of the year. I may love the old man like a grandfather, or really good mentor, but that doesn't mean I would allow him to dictate just what I was ready to learn. That's why I currently had five copies of each of the books in my personal library, along with copies of others I planned on picking up in the future or I just wanted.

Runes are broken. I summarized.

"Let me get this straight. You practiced copying runes on two books, written by one of the most powerful casters to ever live, to perfect a way to talk to your girlfriend without the inconvenience of Owl's flight time." Snape drawled out.

I kind of spaced out for a moment as I realized how dumb it sounded when said out lout. "Well, when you say it like that, it does seem a bit reckless."

Snape actually laughed.

I'll repeat. Snape actually laughed.

Granted, he laughed because of my stupidity, but still, the effect was the same. I smiled, and joined in laughing at myself. The laugh didn't last long, by standard measurements, but it was nice.

"Ok, are you ready." Snape said as he put the books away and drew his wand.

"Wait, here?" I realized that he wanted to teach me how to fly without a broom right now. The ceiling wasn't very tall in the room they were in.

"Yes. It is actually a ridiculously simple concept." Snape began. I shut up as the man went into lecture mode.

"Have ever examined the enchantments on brooms?" Snape asked.

"No, aren't they guarded religiously by manufacturers?" I responded.

"Yes, but there is very little unavailable to the Dark Lord." Snape said and I thought I caught a sneer as he said the name. "He realized that the wood used was the same wood in wands. It had to be magical in nature, as no ordinary wood would work."

I tried not to laugh at the 'wood would' part. Then I realized what he was saying.

"Don't tell me it's an enchantment on your wand." I said exasperated.

Snape's smirk told me all that I needed to know. Then he nodded. "A combination of levitation and propulsion charms."

My mind raced at the possibilities. I had always assumed that a wand couldn't be touched, any enchantments would mess with the internal workings of how the core and wood interacted. I never challenged the idea either, although I had wondered what runic improvements you could make to the wood.

"That wouldn't mess with the interaction between the core and the wood." I asked Snape, deciding to voice my concerns.

"That is what I assumed also. It is a commonly held theory in households. It is born out of ignorance of wand lore. What is the most important aspect of magic?" Snape asked.

I face palmed at the obvious answer, and the words slipped out.

"Intent is everything."

Harry and I stood across from each other in the Room of Requirement, looking at the ground.

Runic clusters upon runic clusters littered the ground in front of us. It was all connected and intertwined. A basic idea I had for capturing Death Eaters had turned into a massive undertaking. Now I was confident of the end result.

"Go ahead." I told Harry.

He looked up at me, like he was scared to approach the drawings on the ground. I couldn't blame him. Some of the previous tests had unintended side-effects that could last for hours. Like a particularly nast cramp in his thigh.

"Pussy." I insulted with a smile. Harry glared at me and gained a cocky smirk before walking forward.

As soon as he reached the circle in the middle of the cluster, his body froze as it activated. Every muscle on his body froze, but I could see his breath in the air and his chest rise and fall. That was a good thing.

"How do you feel buddy?" I asked.

"MMM HHMMM."

I think that means great. I thought as I waved my wand and sent my magic at a particular cluster at my feet. The whole thing deactivated, and I could see Harry again as the shield dropped.

"How was it?" I asked.

"Couldn't move, just like a petrificus totalus." Harry said with a smile. "All of this just for that?"

I had to admit the point, this was a ridiculous amount of work for the same effect a first year could do with three wand movements. It wasn't efficient at all.

"Well, almost three quartes of the clusters are dedicated to differentiating the people who walk into the circle. It's trying to replace the intent that you get with a wand, that makes it so tricky." I told him.

I let out a deep breath of air and slumped. The Room caught me with a chair before I could hit the ground. I love this room. I thought.

"Good job, mate." Harry said as he too sat down in a chair that appeared out of nowhere. "Gotten any farther on your new project?"

I groaned at the reminder. "I need to stop taking up so many headache inducing runic projects." I told him in response.

"Well, you could just do it the way Tom did." Harry said. "The enchantment on the wand thing is a fantastic idea."

"Yea, but I can't do an enchantment, and a runic cluster on a wand. Fleur said that it would probably work, but not at the same time, and it might even interfere." I said in a whining tone of voice.

We sat there for a moment, and I considered falling asleep. Neither of us talked, although Harry was obviously thinking pretty hard. I could see the literal light go off in his head as he had a thought.

"Wait, don't you have two wands?"

My eyes widened, and I blamed being spread too thin to not thinking of it sooner. "Of course! Enchant my back up since it never leaves my wrist, and do the runes on the other."

I felt a vibration in my robes, and a sound that came from Harry's robes told me that we both got the same notification. I calmly reached in and grabbed my Blackbook before opening it. The notification led me to Dumbledore's page.

The message was short, and terrible at the same time.

Attack on the Burrow. All Order members needed.

'POP'

Harry and I appeared with a flourish and in battle mode just outside the wards of the Burrow. Our wands were out, and ready to deal death and destruction to whoever crossed our path. We were too late.

Smoke billowed into the air, and was hovering there as a result of the carnage we walked into. In the sky, the Dark Mark sat like a proud symbol of their victory. I focused on my occlumency as Harry and I started approaching.

'POP'

I turned quickly and raised my wand, ready for an attack. Silver hair and the fragrance of vanilla filled the air as Fleur appeared. I lowered my wand and embraced her as she noticed me.

"Ron…" Fleur began but didn't continue.

I thought it odd, considering she never ran out of things to say. Nor did she lose her words. I mentally prepared myself for what I was about to walk in on.

I grabbed her hand, and gently tugged her to continue into the property. She followed without complaint.

If I didn't know where the house stood before this day, the only identifier would have been the massive patch of black that covered the ground. A result of an obviously powerful fire spell that had wiped the house off of the face of the earth.

"Bloody hell." Harry said beside me.

This was not a part of the books. I thought, as I took in the state of the Burrow.

What was the objective? What did Tom hope to accomplish? I wondered.

Or did he do exactly as he wanted?

Our hands dropped as we saw most of the Order members already standing in the middle of the wreckage.

There were two wooden stakes impaled into the charred ground. Blood streaked up half of the stakes, as if someone had been run through with them before being stuck into the ground. At first I thought it impossible, because of the sheer size of the stakes.

I knew it wasn't impossible when I saw two lumps on the ground beside it, sheets draped over the forms. That's when I knew two things. One was that someone really had been impaled with the massive stakes and stood up for the world to see. Two was that they were obviously dead.

Dumbledore, Bill, Tonks, The Twins, Moody, Kingsley, Sirius, Remus, and a few others stood looking at something on the ground in front of them.

As we got closer. Sirius noticed us first, and when he turned around so did Dumbledore and the rest of the Order members. Everyone but the red-head at the front. Bill did not turn around, he just stared at the two lumps on the ground.

I knew who it was that was dead immediately. If all the clues weren't enough evidence, Sirius' face and the lack of two Order members told me all that I needed to know. A cold numbness spread throughout my body.

My parents were dead. Arthur and Molly Weasley laid under the white sheets.