1 The beginning

"Welp… the afterlife sucks."

Those were the first words I said upon finding myself in a blank white space. Not like I could really say much else, seeing as how I was still feeling a bit disconnected from the transition from bleeding out from getting shanked by a hobo to suddenly being perfectly healthy.

"Not the afterlife," a very familiar voice comes from behind, "and you probably know what this is."

Turning around, I come face to face with a face that, even with its slight differences, I would recognize anywhere, my own. Of course, that was all that I could really say I recognized since the body attached to that face was very much not your own.

"So… assuming you're an alternate omnipotent version of me, since you bothered with the muscular body instead of just copying me fully…" the idealized version of me nodded at my flimsy reasoning, an indulgent smile on his face, "…charity?"

Unfortunately, my hope shriveled and died when he just chuckled and shook his head.

"Right then, entertainment it is," I let out a pained sigh, "do I at least get to choose where I go first?"

"Oh yeah, totally, I'm not evil or anything. In fact, here," he gestured with his hand, causing a screen with a list of various things to appear in front of me, though I immediately focused on the red ten thousand in front of the 'your points' in the corner, "you get to use that as well."

"Why the hell is everything so expensive?" I couldn't help but ask as I went through the various perks, items and drawbacks, "magic costs five thousand! and what does the 'conditions apply' on the warranty mean."

"Well, its gotta be balanced, doesn't it?" was the smarmy reply, "as for the warranty? It means that, as long as you give up the memory of buying it, I'm willing to return you to your life fully healed but without anything else when you die."

I stare at him, then back at the option, then back at him, "… I'm surprised you're being so reasonable. If I'm honest expected you to be a dickhead, what with 'power corrupting' an all."

"What would be the point though? You're me should know that we don't particularly enjoy sadism," I nodded, conceding to that, as I continued going through the last of the list, "plus in the exceedingly unlikely event that you get as powerful as me I just made another enemy."

"Thanks for that then, I guess. So do I just click on what I want?" he nodded before waving his hand and conjuring a chair, which I thanked him for as I sat down and began selecting stuff.

- an indeterminate amount of time later –

"Done!" I exclaim slamming my finger down on the last option before turning to my counterpart, only to freeze when I saw him sitting on a couch with a controller in his hand, "are you seriously gaming right now?"

"What? Oh you're finished," he released the controller in his hand, which immediately dissolved into blue particles, as he got up, "and yeah I was gaming. You've been at it for a subjective hour min-maxing everything, so I decided to do my dailies."

"Okay, that's fair," I admit as the screen floats over to him, "also dailies, really? Also why are you reading it, aren't you omnipotent?"

"It's about the experience, for both those," he waves his hands and I suddenly begin to feel a lot lighter yet heavier at the same time, "it's not fun just willing stuff to happen beyond a certain point. It's fine when I'm just summoning stuff or cooking things or something but using my powers for everything can get really… old very quickly."

"Yeah, I get it. Like playing a game with cheats on," he nods at the allegory, "I guess I would understand, being you an all… so is it time for me to pick the world yet? Cause I'm starting to feel very uncomfortable now…"

"One second… annnnd done!" he finished with one final swish of his hand, "right there's all your soul based stuff done. Now, what world do you want?"

"Harry Potter," I instantly say, only getting a understanding nod from him.

"Yeah, looking at your build I can see what you're intending to do," and suddenly I don't feel anything at all, "you'll get everything physical you chose next to you when you wake up."

I try to say thanks, but nothing comes out of my mouth. Instead, only darkness seems to encroach into my vision.

"Yeah, you can't talk right now since you're only a soul, but you're welcome anyways," his voice is barely audible and my vision fully gone now, "also, I'll put the conditions for me sending you to the next world into your mind as well."

I try to give a thumbs up, hoping he got the point, as I begin to feel even my consciousness fade.

Hopefully I don't get screwed immediately.