Hot and Cold

The sounds of silverware and cutleries clanked at plates. The joyful sound of children's giggles as their parents fed them echoed in the restaurant's four cornered walls. The television showed the daily news and my head swam in the cacophony of sounds.

What in the world is going on?

It was him, the William I knew from the colonial town of Shalem. The only son and heir to the Bernard's Trading Co.

I was sure I saw William back in the parking lot.

Or was I?

Was it really him or did I just see Bash and Will superimposed?

"Another cup of hot coffee, miss?"

I jerked back to reality as a waitress called my attention. She brought a refill for our coffee and I gladly accepted. Her name-tag read 'Hi! I'm Melissa.'

"Thank you, Melissa." I told her as she poured my second fill of coffee. She had that dark undertones only an overworked person has. The apron of her uniform had a tiny stain and her eye-bags bulged too.

She gave me a sweet but clearly tired smile.

Perhaps this was her last shift or maybe she had another work to go to but all she wanted was to sleep and curl in a nice, soft, and warm bed.

Poor Melissa.

Zeke was busy with his phone, he tapped and swiped and his food was left untouched. Becky on the other hand took pictures of her food and drink, and then lightly elbowed Zeke for a couple photo.

"Lizzie, your food has gone cold. You only drank coffee and haven't eaten anything." Becky called my attention. She started to dig into her meal after finally getting the right angle to post for her social medias.

"Your meal has gone cold too, you know." I shot back at her as I picked up a sliced pancake from her plate.

"Heyyy, that was mine." She pouted. "I like my pancakes this way. Funny you let yours get cold though, you always liked them hot."

"Yeah Lizzie. You've been acting funny since yesterday." Zeke chimed in. He had his interest on his phone though and his eyes weren't on me, thankfully.

My eyes darted from Becky to Zeke and I let out a forced laugh to cover up my nervousness. Darn it, do they suspect a thing?

"Ahh... You know me, I don't really do well with long rides." I made up an excuse I remember my reincarnated self-used to make.

"Hey guys, are you almost done now?" I heard Ali call out from the opposite table where Bash and the others were seated.

"Yeah, almost!" Becky replied and pushed her half-finished food forward. She stood up and informed she'll go to the toilet and fix herself.

With Becky gone in her seat, it was just Zeke, and I, and the silence between us that was left behind.

There was a long pause that became more awkward as every second passed by. Zeke tapped at his phone without much interest. Every tick of the second hand was another second of gauche silence.

"I'll just go to the toilet too for a while." Zeke finally said and shifted his chair to stand up. The air around me suddenly became lighter. The awkward aura emitted by him now gone.

I looked down and played with the miserable cold strawberry pancakes I had but immediately thought better. There were many who couldn't afford nor have the privilege to eat good stuffs like I do now and it made me feel guilty.

I gobbled all of the food that remained but a huge chunk stuck at my throat and made me retch. I didn't know who it was but someone just tapped my back as if to soothe me as I made unearthly gagging sounds.

I curled down and tried to stifle the noise I made as I covered my mouth. A big hand handed me some tall glass of water and I took it without hesitation.

As I gulped the water like a thirsty camel, my eyes teared up and I couldn't see much due to the build-up of liquid in my tear ducts.

"You ok Lizzie?" I heard Bash's voice say behind me and I froze in place. No, please not Bash.

I coughed again and sat straight to compose myself while Bash continued to tap at my back slowly.

Bash only stopped after he noticed I had begun to breathe fine. He dragged an empty sit from the other table and just sat down beside me like I was some sickly kid he needed to watch over.

"What do you want?" I glared at him. I was not in the mood for some small talks with him since I saw William's apparition back at the parking lot.

Heck, I was not in the mood at all to talk to him.

He just reminds me every single time. His face, his eyes, the jet-black raven hair. A younger and new version of the William Bernards I knew and love.

Loved.

Past tense.

Because everything ended with his betrayal and all that is left now is hatred. The longing? It's still here. But we are never the same after the burning in Shalem.

Even our reincarnations aren't the exact same person we were back then.

"I'd want to talk with you that's all." Bash said as he put his arm on the table and leaned forward. "You make me curious Lizzie."

Darn it. Not now, please go away. My mind and heart are not yet ready.

"Are you bipolar by any means?" he asked suddenly.

"What?" I squealed. What did he mean I'm bipolar? I racked my brain for the word he had thrown at me and tried to understand why he inferred I was such.

"I mean, yesterday when we picked you and Becky up at your dorm, I swear…" he made a confused face and continued, "I don't know. You seem like a different person now."

I squinted my eyes at him and scanned his face to see if he was serious or just poking fun at me. He saw my face went cold and he backed up a little and raised his hands to his chest in a defensive stance.

"Don't be mad, please? I just wanted to understand you and I might be an idiot-"

"You are." I interrupted him mid-sentence. My temper rose and I snapped.

Bash cleared his throat and blushed a bit, "Okay, maybe I am. But I just wanted to really be friends, you know? Yesterday you spat at me, then you said sorry and played civil, and at the parking lot you just looked at me with rage I actually thought you'd kill me."

I looked him straight in the eyes and tried to hold myself back from the urge to slap his pretty chiseled face.

"You really want to know?" I challenged and moved my face closer to him, just an inch of a breath away. My lips brushed the tips of his ear and I could smell pinewoods and his musky man scent.

"Do you want to know if I want to kill you?"