17 Star - A Lesson In Being A Wolf

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Star

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I was still groggy when the sun woke me the next morning. It was early since I had gone to sleep early. But I was not used to the sun being able to wake me when it rose for the day. I hadn't seen the sun this much in my entire life. It was kind of unsettling for me really.

I didn't have much to do when I got up. I went into the bathroom to relieve myself, wash my hands and face, just doing those things made me feel like I was living some kind of dream.

I saw that my face was looking brighter and clearer than it had yesterday. Was that what eating more than once or twice a week would do for me? My hair looked beautiful too. It was long, and clean for once. The golden brown tresses swaying with soft, gentle, barely there curls. Today my eyes were a bright, shining, sapphire blue.

I had heard my eyes described to me many times. Reed and Bailey used to tell me how pretty they were, and that was nice to hear. But when Uncle Howard had described my eyes, or anything else about me, it alway made my skin crawl and brought bile to the back of my throat. I think the difference was with their intentions when they described what they saw.

I could see some of the bruises beginning to fade around the edges now. Having had some decent food in my system for once, some nutrients that my body could draw on for energy, it finally kick started my healing process that I had feared was slowing down. I was just more injured than I had realized.

Looking at me though, I could still tell I was too small, too thin. There wasn't an ounce of fat on my body. Yet, despite my 'unconventional' lifestyle I still had a small amount of muscle definition along my arms, legs, and small ripples on my abdomen. Was that part of what it meant to be a werewolf? Was some sort of physical prowess a must among the species?

My hips and waist were narrow. My collar bones were very visible. The thin bones in my wrist were also prominent. I could tell that my body still lacked for either more tone or more weight.

While I was inspecting myself in the mirror I heard a knock at the door followed by the click of it opening almost immediately. Nervously, I walked out of the bathroom and into the bedroom to see who was coming into the room. It wasn't my place so I couldn't stop them from coming in.

"Morning, Star." Chay called out. "See what I did there?" She laughed. "I basically called you an angel." I quirked an eyebrow, my eyes squinted in confusion, it was definitely a 'huh?' type of look.

Chay laughed at my expression, clearly she thought I looked funny.

"Oh, don't give me that look. It was just a joke. But I guess you wouldn't know who the Morningstar is." I shook my head, still confused, as I walked over to the table where the notepad from the day before was sitting.

[Good morning] I wrote to her in the pad as she walked over to me.

"How are you this morning?"

[I'm Ok]

"Do you want to go get breakfast with me?" I shook my head. I was still nervous about leaving the room. I didn't know if it was all just a test to try to get me to leave the room.

[No] I added it to the paper.

"I wish you would." She sighed. "But oh well, I can have breakfast brought up here." She smiled now. "I just want to eat breakfast with you."

[Why?] I was confused by this. Didn't she have somewhere else to eat her meals? And other people to eat them with?

"Because we're friends." She smiled at me. "Or I want us to be." I just hung my head, guilt washing over me.

I didn't know how to be a friend, or if I could even do it at all. I just wanted a life free of pain, worry, and fear. I wanted to be free, through and through. When would I get that.

"Come on, let's eat then I will take you shopping." She grinned and reached for my hand, but I immediately pulled away, shaking my head.

[No!] I was panicking now. [I can't go shopping!] Fear was coursing through my heart so fast that I thought my heart would take flight with it's rapid beat.

"Why not?" Chay looked saddened. "You're allowed to go Star, you know that right?"

[Even if I am I would be too scared]

"Why are you scared?"

[I've never been before. It's too soon.]

"Oh, so you're not ready." She was smiling like she understood it now. My head was just shaking side to side as I showed another note.

[Not ready]

"Don't worry. I just wanted to buy you some clothes. We can wait until you're ready though. I will lend you some of mine and I will go buy a few things for you later. That way you have something that is all yours and you don't need to wait until I bring you more clothes." Chay's smile was bright and happy at that moment. "How does that sound?" I just nodded, silently giving my approval.

After a few minutes, when my heart had settled and we were eating our breakfast, I decided there was something I wanted to ask Chay. Something I needed to know.

[Can you tell me what it means to be a wolf?]

"I was planning on doing that anyway." She smiled at me. "We've all gotta stick together, and all of us here are going to help you." I just watched her as I continued eating the food that was brought to me. She said it was just fried eggs with bacon and toast, but it was amazing. I loved it. I never knew food was so good.

After we ate, Chay started to explain what it meant to be a wolf. All the things I was never told as I was growing up.

She gave me quite the extensive run down on our wolf culture. And to be honest, by the time it was done my head was spinning and throbbing. I felt confused and lost.

Chay didn't know how far back werewolves went in history, but she was certain it went back several generations. The wolves of the world used to be united, but at some point they separated and formed packs.

Our pack, the Hidden Paw, was secluded and hidden away from other packs. For generations, the Alphas of this pack had despised and looked down upon weak wolves.

It was even believed that in the past, the Alphas would sell the weaker wolves to an evil warlock. It was the same warlock that had taught our pack how to make the talismans. Those had been dark times, even darker than they currently are. After the Omegas stopped getting sold they were isolated and imprisoned.

It was only after the selling stopped and the imprisoning started that the new brand of evil entered the pack. That was when the beatings started. That was when the deaths started. It was the start of a whole new dark age, and the Alphas encouraged it.

But apparently, things were supposed to be changing.

Now, about being a wolf. As long as you have one parent that is a wolf, then you will be a wolf, most of the time. It's rare for the wolf not to appear for someone who is half wolf. And there are many different ranks among the wolves. And, of course, the Omega was the weakest.

The rank of a wolf was not usually determined until someone was an adolescent. This was another process taught to us by warlocks. There was a way to see what power your wolf would have when it finally emerged.

Though, apparently, that ranking wasn't set in stone. So it made no sense to me that they would persecute those people when they could have raised their ranks. What kind of sick, twisted, mental games had someone played on the former leaders of this pack to make them, and everyone else, become so twisted?

Being a werewolf meant that you would, of course, turn into a wolf when you reached a certain age and had your first shift. It wasn't something that only happened monthly or with the full moon but at will when you could control it. Or when you were extremely angry, that could also bring out the wolf.

Things that were better for werewolves, more enhanced, were the vision, sense of smell, speed, and strength. Not to mention the faster healing. There was also a sort of second sense we have that let us know when something is in our way or coming. That was definitely not something I had, if I did, I wouldn't get caught when escaping.

She told me a few more other odds and ends, but by then my head was spinning and I sort of stopped listening. I had spent that whole day talking with Chay in the room and eating the different foods that they brought to the room for us. I was so tired when it was all done and over with that I basically collapsed into the bed while Chay was still in the room. She covered me with the blanket and left quietly as I fell right to sleep.

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