1 1 How To Escape A Crazy Woman
*Click* *Click* *tap* *tap*
¶Ultra kill!¶
"Let's go one more!!" The man screamed.
*Click* *click*
¶RAMPAGGEEE¶
"Woooo yeahhh baby! That's what I've been waiting for, that's what all about Wooo Yeahh!" He celebrated.
"Get destroyed losers!"
{fuckin hell man ur trash}
{quit the game cyka}
{bladdi fucking bladdi bastards}
{putang ina rampage hahaha}
{GGWP}
{Bobo talaga}
{siapa mao kontol!}
{hahaha weak shits lolololol}
{gg}
{fuck Cyyykkaaaa! Look baseeee}
"Huh?" Before the man looked at his base, the game ended with his enemies winning instead.
{lmao}
{lol still win}
{ggez}
{???}
{?}
"FUCCCCCCKKK!! Shittt!!" The man smashed his RGB mechanical keyboard.
*smash* *smash*
"Haaah" The man sighed at the scattered buttons.
"Fuck... I did it again." The man muttered in exhaustion, as he calmed himself down.
*ring* *ring* *ring* *ring*
"What a waste... My roommate will yell at me later." the man got up as he reached out to pick up his phone.
"Hello?" He picked up an unknown number annoyingly.
"..." There was no response.
"Another scam call?" He waited for a moment before hanging up and blocking the number.
*pop* *pop* *pop*
The man looked at the chat notifications from his buddies.
{Kyle: Yo Jan, did you see the latest chapter of Jujutsu Kaisen?}
"Not yet, Why?" I replied to the conversation.
{Ricardo: shit was another massacre man}
"Oi, I haven't read it. Don't spoil me." I immediately replied.
{Ricardo: Gojo became Go/jo, and the farmer got waffled heeeehehehe.}
{Kyle: read it, man, stop reading those fuckin degenerate hentai doujins}
{Ricardo: Hahahahha}
{Kyle: get a girlfrienddddd you always play with your hand Hahahah ah}
{Ricardo: don't you live near the red light district? Hahahah get a hooker man}
"Whatever." The man dropped his phone on the bed and changed his clothes for a casual outfit to buy a new Manga.
...
-Outside-
On a bustling night in Tokyo, Japan.
<Jan pov>
"Hallo!" Some bar workers looked for customers in the streets with their signs.
"Ni-sama, would yo-." A woman in skimpy clothes stepped in front of me.
"No... I'm busy miss." I cut her off politely, as I moved forward.
"Tsk." I heard her clicking her tongue at my immediate refusal.
*sigh* Honestly, I need to move to a different area. However, finding one is really hard as some apartments are overpriced with such little room
-At a random manga store-
"It's more empty than usual." I looked around only to find a few people including the store clerk.
'Here it is. Latest release of Jujutsu Kaisen.' I grabbed a copy of it.
"Why don't I snag some few doujins while I'm here." I went to the 18+ section in the store.
"As expected there's-?" I double-looked at what had just happened, as I swore I saw a person just now.
"Must be my imagination." It felt weird at first, as I moved and continued to browse to the Mangas.
...
"Arigatou gozaimasu-." The store clerk said as I went and headed back to my apartment.
"What a tiring trip," I muttered as I walked 5 kilometers back to my apartment.
I pulled out my phone to listen to some music in the dark street as a shortcut to my apartment.
"It should be safe at least..." I said as there shouldn't be anyone here.
{Kyle: fuck give me an ice bath rn its hella hot in my country rn.}
{Kyle: Jan careful there bud there are many accidents of getting hit by a truck}
"Accidents like that are rare," I replied.
{Ricardo: man might go on an isekai trip hahaha}
"Who knows? I'm on my way back to my apartment from buying the new manga."
{Kyle: look out hahaha you'll get hit by a truck}
{Ricardo: hehe that time I got reincarnated as the strongest mf in the world}
{Kyle: hahahahah}
"Yeah right." I didn't mind their message as I'm currently in a dark alley. A truck hitting me is downright impossible.
*Rustle* *Hissss*
I looked behind at where the rustle came from, which made my heart rise for a moment.
"You stupid cat." I shooed away the black cat for scaring the shit out of me.
I walked faster in the empty dark street with few street lights.
Eventually, I'm now back on the bustling street, with several drunk salarymen who could be seen.
*sigh* 'No matter how many times I walked in that dark alley, it still creeps me out.' Wiping the sweat on my forehead. As I'm close to my apartment.
-Jan's Apartment-
"I'm safe and sound..." I looked at the shoe rack, and it seemed like my roommate wasn't back yet since his shoes weren't there yet.
"Good. I have the apartment all to myself for now." As I went to take a long shower. To keep my mind and body clean.
*shisssshh* *shower noises* *TUD* *shisshsh*
"Ren? You're back?" I yelled and thought he had returned and returned to finish my shower.
"Ren?" I called out while drying my hair with the towel.
Strange the room is still dark... Ren should've turned the lights on.
Or did I misheard it from the neighbor's room?
*Thunk!*
My vision was slowly getting blurry as I collapsed down to the floor seeing a familiar woman holding a blunt weapon of sorts, that I kind of swear I have seen her before.
"You will be alright..." She whispered.
"Take a sleep for now. Jan-kun." She said as she dragged me across the room.
"W-ho evvven r- yo-" I couldn't even speak Japanese properly as I lost consciousness.
.
...
.
"Where..." I looked around while trying to move my body.
'Am blindfolded? And am I also tied up!?' I thought as I panicked.
'did someone kidnap me???'
"Hello?" I spoke in Japanese.
"If you want money, I certainly can't give it to you. I'm poor as hell." I wasn't even sure there was someone present.
"I'm not after your money." I heard the sweet voice of a woman, just a few meters from my spot.
"Ma'am, why are you doing this to me?" I confusingly said.
"You. Me. Together~. Okay?" She spoke in a broken English.
"What?" I couldn't hear it properly.
"You me together." She whispered in my ears, sending chills to my spine.
"Why? I don't even know you." I replied. I didn't know that many girls in my 5 years living in Japan, and the ones I did probably did their own thing and had already forgotten about me.
"I am Keiko Kuroha, we met in high school remember?" She said in Japanese.
"Who?" You expect me to know who you are when it's been 4 years since my high school!?
"We kissu. We kiss. In front of the class." She said frantically.
"Ah Keiko-san, long time no see?" I still don't know her, as my sweat trickled down since couldn't remember it. I haven't even kissed a girl yet. Nor was I diagnosed with amnesia when I did my last check-up.
"Ah, Jan-kun still remembers me~. Though I am a little bit sad that you immediately pushed me earlier in the street when I stepped in front of you." She said happily.
"hahaha-" I dryly laughed to hide my nervousness. It was her!? The woman in that skimpy attire that I encountered!?
"Ummm. Keiko-san can you let me go?" I tried my luck.
"Okay Jan-kun~" She took off my blindfold.
Letting me see her beautiful appearance, making me speechless for a moment at how stunning the woman in front of me was, And the fact that I couldn't even remember her name.
"Ehehe. Am I now beautiful for you Jan-kun?" She giggled as her facial expression immediately turned ugly for a moment. It's like an anime character whose face, has two sides.
"Oh Ara? Is there something you like Jan-kun?" She asked as my face grimaced realizing what was around me.
"Is that..." I gulped at the corpse beside me. "Ren?" My roommate's corpse could be seen, at what could be described as ground meat. Because what's left of him is his intact head with mushed lower body.
*Blech* *blarg* *bleeeggh*
"There there Jan-kun." She patted my shoulder.
"What did you do to him!?" I looked at her terrifyingly, she obviously mutilated my guy.
"He got in our way. He wants to separate me and you, Jan-kun." She said in a cold voice.
"Why go that far!?" I tried wiggling my body to get away from his psycho.
'I don't even know you!!! You fucking parasocial bitch!' I screamed inside.
"Hmmm?" She perversely looked at me.
"After so many hours we have been separated, I've finally gotten to touch and get this close to you, Jan-kun." She said, before reaching into her bloodied bag.
I struggled to get this bondage off me, before stopping as she looked at me once again.
"Look Jan-kun, these are my favorite treasures that I got from you~." She showed an empty can of coffee.
"Uhhhh- what's that supposed to be?" I calmly.
I remembered that I needed to be calm in this kind of situation.
'Fuck calm, how can I possibly be calm in front of a serial killer!?'
"Ah, this can be from 3 days ago, when you bought it at the nearby convenience store. After that, you drank from it~, which you then licked around the rim of the can. You threw it immediately as it almost went in the trash bin. Thankfully I managed to catch it in time to preserve it." She explained it obsessively.
"How did you even know!?" I gasped at how weird this girl was. I don't know the full details but, judging from how she describes it, I could tell she's one of those crazy people you could only find in an anime.
Is she one of those yandere in anime? I thought they weren't real!!!
"Well, I watched you 24/7 Jan-kun, after our first kiss together that was 4 years, 3 months, and 5 weeks ago." She cupped her blushing cheeks.
"What?" Now she was getting creepy the more she yapped.
"Jan-kun... I can't take it anymore..." She looked at me affectionately as she pulled out a shiny knife as I could see my reflection on it.
"Whaaaa-wait, yo-you you don't wanna do this, Keiko-san," I begged.
"After this, we will be together forever, even in the afterlife Jan-kun." She giggled happily.
'A murder and a suicide!? Nah I still don't plan on dying!!!'
"Don't struggle Jan-kun." She said softly while tracing the sharp knife in my body.
"Pleaseee. Keiko-san I don't wanna die yet." I whined as She stopped before the knife could cut into me.
'Did it work?' I wondered.
"Are you afraid Jan-kun?" She asked, to which I nodded in response.
"Don't worry Jan-kun! You shouldn't be afraid. After all, I'll join right after you." She said cheerfully.
'It didn't even make it better!!'
I kicked her away as the sharp knife accidentally cut the rope and cut my thigh a little.
After that pro gamer move. I then rushed to the door as I didn't want to waste time to attack her while my hand was still tied behind me, that would be a disadvantageous play if I did that.
"Ah fuck!" I reached for the door handle to open it with my hand at the back.
I could hear her standing up.
"fast fast fast quick!!!" I had a hard time turning the door handle as it was slightly higher than my buttocks area where my hand is tied. As for the 2nd lock, I unlocked it with my mouth.
In my head, it was playing speedrun music. Because of the intense situation I was in.
"Jan-kun! What are you doing!?" She yelled as she rushed. After I have escaped the room.
I rushed forward to find myself in the middle of who knows where.
"Where did this bitch take me!?" I found no choice but to run in a zigzag direction.
*stomp* *whoosh* *cracking leaves*
*Huff* *huff* *huff*
After running for a few minutes straight at full speed. I could finally see a few lights in the distance.
"I'm close haaa." I reached the open area...
Only to stumble on a steep wedge. Where I rolled down violently as I didn't expect there to be one.
"ouch. Ah.." Thankfully the wedge wasn't that tall.
"I..." I looked from the distance. As I see a blinding light flashing on me.
*HONK!* *HOOOOONK!*
Ah...
I tried moving away... But my ankles seemed like they were sprained.
Fuck.
*HOOONKKK!!*
"Well, it's better to have a quick death. Shame I couldn't give my goodbyes to my best friends..."
"So long boys, I'm going on an Isekai journey first." I sighed, accepting my fate.
Truck-kun has come to as my grim reaper... How ironic, I even mocked it before as a joke.
*CRAASHHH!!*
"ARRUUGGH FU!!" I screamed as I ragged dolled under the truck.
It should've finished me in one move!!!
"ARGGHHHHH!!!" Pain ran through every fiber of my being as the Truck stopped on me.
"YOU SHITTY DRIVERRRR-" I roared at the top of my lungs.
*Vrum*
The Truck reversed back as my foot got run over.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!! FUCCCCKKKK. You bastard." I cried as it fucking hurts so bad. Now I would rather bleed to death than go through this misery.
The Truck drove forward yet again.
"I swear once I have gone to hell, I'll fuck your ANCESTORS-AAAAAA!!!!" This driver might be just playing with my life at this point...
*Crack*
The Truck driver finally snapped my head backward with the Truck's wheels...
.
-Jan Yolisti, Died from running away from a truck.
...
-Chapter End-
