2 Darkness.....

Where.....am..... I?

In my point of view, I was surrounded by pure darkness. I tried looking at any direction but I couldn't find anything.

There are no traces of lights nor voice. It was only pure black and complete silence.

This is different from the silence and darkness that I usually know. It was never dark as there is always light coming out of the moon, and it was never silent as there will be always faint and small sound coming from the surrounding.

I mean sounds may even come from the small things we do like breathing, walking or even if just touching one self.

But this time, It's different.

Just what is this place?...

It was so eerie and creepy, as if I was thrown into another dimension suddenly.

.....

How....

Just how the hell did I came here!?

the feeling of fear and panic slowly emerge within my feelings as I brainstormed my thoughts to what have possibly happened for me to suddenly come here.

Ughhh.....

I tried to remember everything that could've happened before this current reality appeared before me.

Think...I need to think.....Urghhh....

And from that.

I then started to slowly remember bits and bits of my memories.

When I was on my way to my house after school. I was looking at some stores and then I watched the other people have fun.

I was continuing walking home but then I heard a voice of someone.

After that I...

I?.....Eeeh?

I got struck by something on my head and everything went dark.

A quick pain rushed to my head and after that it didn't feel painful anymore.... It was weird and sudden.

 I tried opening my eyes. But all that I could see is pure blackness..... Wait is my eyes still close? Or is it open? Which one is it?.

Its too confusing, I can't even feel my body,I can't hear anything, I can't see anything. There is absulutely nothing.

it's scary.....Even though I can't feel the thump of my heart, I can already imagine what it feels like to be so uneasy.

I can still feel but it's mostly focused on fear and anxiousness by now.

This is terrifying, so terrifying... I never been more scared in my life.

As I thought about that, my life then quickly flashed through my memories as if it was summarized.

My life...

I was 17 years old and all that I have achieved during that time was being one of the top students at school.

But to be honest I don't feel happy about it, why?, Its because I only focused on studying as a way to escape reality from my family....

I didn't get loved and I was just barely noticed at all. Even if they saw me they will just ignore me.

Was I a kind of ghost? Why won't they treat me like a proper daughter.... Even though I tried pleasing them with my grades and performance at school..... It felt like, it was never enough.

But I then learned the reason why I got treated that way.... To why I was ignored... It was because I'm a child from a different mother...I heard that from a housekeeper that works for my so called parents.

Based from their talks when I was walking around, my original mother died after giving birth to me and after that, my father hooked up with another woman and got remarried again.

And after that, I was then raised by a nanny who they hired from I don't know where And not expecting it, I became quite close with her for some reason... She liked me, she looked at me with a gentle smile unlike to what my so called parents always do.

She took care of me, she played games with me, teached me words and read books to me. She fed me with delicious snacks and desserts.... It was totally a nice time.

I thought that maybe that was the time where I could finally feel love being given to me. A gentle warm that will always stay with me.

I thought that with that nanny, we will be living life together for a long time, and to be honest, I'm not against it since I like her very much, but regretfully, that one never came true.

There was one day that she didn't come to see me. At first I thought that maybe she is not coming because she has something important to do. Several days had passed by and yet she still didn't appeared even once.

I also remembered being scared and anxious just like now.

Ever since then, I asked myself plenty of times if did she leave because she is fed up with me? Or leave because she hated me?, was I too annoying that she didn't want to be with me anymore? Those thoughts tortured me that time.

But it seems none of those were the reason for her disappearance.

And for why I know that? ... Its because I heard my so called parents talking about what happened to my nanny when I was randomly walking around the house.

Ahhhh...

It was because of that when I finally learn about what happened to her.

She died...

Yes, she died in a traffic accident.....

Of course at that time I still didn't know the meaning of "died" is.... When I asked my so called parents to where she is, they just told me with the same cold eyes that my nanny will never come back again and that was it.

I was then taken cared off by another nanny who they hired after that. However this time, she didn't treat me nicely like the previous nanny did but rather she was strict as she focused more on discipling me and teaching me on my education.

And after some time as I was growing , I learned a lot of things and I also eventually gave up pleasing my family since it was all hopeless no matter what I do.

Not to mention they even gave birth to a son and that son got all the loving and attention needed for a child. And honestly I can't find myself saying that I was never jealous of that.

Well back to me, I focused on studying and reading and then after that, I discovered social media and then online games which caught my attention. 

All of them became my hobbies that I could use to ignore my lonely past. 

Anyways, returning to my situation and current reality now..... Can I atleast say that I lived a very unfair and uneventful life.

..... And now, based from this total silence and darkness, is it perhaps that I am dead?

Is this what death looks like? Total blackness and emptiness? No heaven nor hell?

No wait... is it true that I'm dead? or am I just in a state of coma?

Are all the deceased people just like this? Are we suppose to experience this after death? I thought before that if a human dies, it will be the end of all his sense, he won't be able to feel consciousness nor even have the capability to think nor dream. 

But if it's true that I'm dead then.... Isn't this very unfair?

I died very young and also without feeling true love. I died without finding happiness and peace. And worse, I died without any warning at all.

It was so sudden and quick....

I guess what they say is true, that death just arrive in times you just don't expect.

Haha.... talk about being unlucky.

I sighed and smiled at myself for being unfortunate.

"It was.... all stupid huh...."

This was the time that I feel like crying again.... Wait but was I really crying? I can't really tell since I can't see nor touch my face, but the feeling that I have now is the feeling that I know I always felt when I cried.

*sigh*

Its not truly fair you know.....

I never truly enjoyed my life..... While the others led their lives to the fullest and being the happiest, I on the other hand was the opposite.

I lived my life trying to please the people that would never look at me. I lived being alone and empty while never finding peace.

It was unfortunate..... I didn't even reached adulthood.

Damn it! Damn it! damn it!

Was I not meant for happiness at all? why is it always being taken away from me?

Why?

Am I really that so unlucky?

.....

What have I done to deserve this kind of life..... isn't it so unfair..... it's so dumb.....its so stupid..... So stupid.....

"Yes it was stupid~."

Ehhh?

A voice!?

While I was crying my heart out. A voice rang out to my ear. I quickly turned around to look if there was someone behind me and when I turned what appeared before me was a bright flash of light causing me to close my eyes.

URGHHH what the??

"Fufufu you can open your eyes now."

Hearing the voice again, I slowly opened my eyes and saw something very unfamiliar.

A garden?

It was a place that has plenty of plants, there is also a fountain with flowing water and the rest of the placei s full of white floating things that looked like clouds. It looked so fluffy too, I wonder what will happen if I touched that with my hand.

"Fufufu ~ curious aren't you~"

It was the same voice that I heard from before, I quickly look around for the source of the sound and what appeared this time was a woman.

It was female person that I never ever met in my short life, she was wearing a clean white robe making her so very elegant to look at.

But more importantly....

If I would compare it to the books I have read before then I would say that it is so similar to the clothes that roman gods and goddesses wear.

As for the face of this person... It was very beautiful.....

She has shining gold eyes and a long straight golden hair. A motherly face outline.... And a gentle smile.....

"Ohhh my..... Thanks for the compliment~"

"Ehhh?"

Compliment? but I didn't said anything right?

I don't remember saying anything to her.

Wait.... did I perhaps said my thoughts accidentally?

"Fufufu you don't need to worry about that, you didn't said them out loud afterall~"

"!?"

Wait I didn't said it? Then how? how did she knew what I was thinking about then?

Is she able to read my mind or something?

No no no, as if that is possible in the first place.

"you are actually correct you know~"

"huh?"

I stood still in shock.

Wait are you telling me that you can clearly read my mind.

"once again~ yes~"

She smiled at me and I reflexively put my hand in front of my mouth.

Wait? Hand?!

I quickly looked down and touched my face with both of my hands.

My body!? ... It's here!? ..... But how!? ..... There was none of it a while ago....

While I was dumbfouded to myself. The person smiled again and took a seat that appeared from no where.

And after that a table appeared between me and her. And on top of that table was plenty of snacks and a cup of drink to go along with it.

Wha!!?

Where did she get this, I'm pretty sure that there was nothing here a while ago.

"Please take a seat first."

As the person said that, a chair suddenly appeared behind me.

I was reluctant to sit at first but it seems rude to not accept since the other person offered me to sit. So with that, I slowly sat down and then looked at the other person in front of me.

"uhmmmm"

I looked at her with a curious expression. Who is she? and where am I?

"ohh... sorry about that, I forgot to introduce myself."

She coughed and then puff out her chest with confidence, she smiled brightly once more and continued.

"I am a god of another world, you can call me Aria, and for this place, let's just say that It's my garden."

"A goddess."

"Yes a goddess~wait whats with that reaction!!? Normal people would shout in surprise you know!."

Ehh?? Is that so?

I didn't noticed that I was looking at her with a blank face since I'm still processing all the new information in my head at the moment.

But still I'm kind of surprise. Well only a little bit , besides, I can't find myself to be in the mood to show it.

"I see~ well lets get to the main subject..."

"??."

"You died...."

"..."

I died??....

"Yes~"

She answered with the same tone of voice as if it was just normal.

I see....So I died huh.

So what I was thinking back in that darkness was really correct.

Uhmmmm...

I don't know what exactly to say to this but.... I am totally speechless right now.

"Don't worry I kind of understand your feelings.."

"Uhmmm..... So, h-how did I die?"

"Ara, You want to know?"

"Unnn"

I gave a nod as a reply. All I know is that I felt a sudden pain and next after that was the black place. So I'm curious to what happened to me.

"I can replay the scene of how you died but I won't do it."

"What do you mean?"

She have a displeased look but why is she having that expression?. I'm curious....

"You died because of a pole that fell from a building... That scene is too sensitive to show....I wonder if you can handle seeing something like that"

"Ohhh..."

So I got a stabbed by a pole, oh wait since I felt that pain in my head then.... did I perhaps got stabbed in the head?

"yes it was directly to your head..."

Oh so that was the reason for the sudden pain huh..... Atleast now I know.

"Well that's that, I bet you are wondering to what will happen to you now aren't you?"

Hmmmm, she should be correct about that ... Now that I died.... What will happen to me, I'm not going to lie but this seems pretty scary.

"It's okay don't worry.... In fact I was thinking of sending you to another world~"

Another world? Oh wait she did say that she was a god from another world when she introduced herself earlier.

But what kind of world was that, hmmm if I remembered correctly I kind of have read some novels that has the genre called isekai which is similar to this.

"Yes that's right, well now that you have mentioned that, it looks like I won't need to bother explaining it, but of course I will still tell the important parts~"

"..."

"Since you have read those kind of books then I'm pretty sure that you now have some ideas regarding this~ "

I then tried recalling all the information that I read from some novels. And of course the first that came to my mind was the word magic and fantasy.

"magic?.."

"yes there will be magic but you and only a number of people will be able to use it."

"Is it rare?"

"Yes ~ by the way the one that is common there are the skills that can be obtained through training.~"

"..."

"There also some special skills which are bestowed by a goddess and that one is super rare."

"How many gods are there?"

"Plenty, but of course many of those gods just don't give their blessings to people that easily making it rare~ well most of them are like that unlike that one troublesome girl that gives her blessing without any care."

After she said that, she sighed as if it was really troubling her. 

Anyways, I kind of understand what she just told me, in other words, the people should work very hard and must achieve something that will catch the interest of a god.

hmmmm....It reminds me trying to please my father and mother before with my grades. In which of course failed.

Also now that Aria-sama mentioned it, since there are plenty of gods and goddesses, it's very similar to the religion of the other countries in earth where they say that there is a god in everything.

"By the way regarding gods, there is that gir- I mean goddess of darkness that was kind of interested in you, she been watching for some time from before, and she was the one that also informed me about you."

"Then is she here?"

"Currently not at the moment, but she will bless you with some special skill after you go to the other world."

"I see...."

A special skill huh, well atleast for now I don't need to worry about not having any skills.

But I wonder, will Aria-sama also give me some skills, wait no no no... If i have the blessing of another god then is it okay to have a blessing of another god too?

"Yes it's okay you know, besides you kind of deserve it ~"

"Deserve it?"

"I told you haven't I? We've been watching you, we are aware of how you lived your life... But sadly we can't interfere with it since that world belongs to another god. And now that you are with us then you wouldn't need to worry about that anymore"

"I see....."

"That's why"

"Ehhh?"

Before I knew it, Aria-sama disappeared in front of me and after that, there was suddenly a warmth feeling embracing me.

Hmm!!?

There was the arms of Aria-sama embracing me from behind.

"There we go~."

Wahh!!? I was stunned and surprised. Just how did she moved so fast!? 

"Fufufu"

What came after that was a gentle pat on my hair, and for some reason I can't find myself wanting to resist.

"You did your best coming this far."

"Ehhh??..."

She was praising me but why? And not only that, why do I feel like my feelings was being moved by her words. 

"Now now, you've done a good job until now."

!!!?

Ehhh??

....Those words.

Hearing those words made me feel something different as if something hit my heart so hard.

My sights turn blurry as tears coming from both of my eyes are flowing out.

Ehhh? Tears? but why?

"There, there, there."

She continued stroking my hair gently and softly. I wonder, is this is the feeling of having a mother?.

"You don't need to endure it anymore, It's all fine now..."

All fine?

"..."

"You are a good girl, you did a great job on your life, all the effort you've done are not meaningless. You very worked very hard and I know that. Don't worry, It's all okay now."

"*Hic*.....That's *hic*"

...

Accompanied with the words that I really ever wanted to hear from someone, this made me cry out more.

And with that, time flew by as I cried while being embraced by Aria-sama, it was the feeling of happiness.