Extra 2

Dreaming makes me feel like I'm reliving a nightmare, the rush, and fright that fell from you as you fall off a cliff and remember that helplessness as I watch it knowing I couldn't do anything about it.

I hesitate to close my eyes, feared that the nightmare would come again but it didn't.

Something happened.

It was a mixed emotion, after I woke up, my dreams weren't like before and it made me want to just sleep forever knowing that once I woke up, it would just become a dream.

It was her and me.

She was genuinely smiling at me, something that I've never seen and it made me feel breathless.

Eyes lighting up in glee, lips pursed in a smile as she held my hands. Her small hand was encased in my large ones and I held it with care.

I could feel the infatuation in my eyes, the care and gentleness that I've used whenever she's near and that is not what I am.

Everything that I've done in my dream has been so far-fetched to who I am.

That made me want to try, a future that could've to happen if I just pay attention, if I could just talk to her and get to know her then things would have turned better.

Something that could not happen in real life, a fragment of my imagination and expectation, just a wisp of air.

...

The day after I saw her pulled the trigger on herself, I asked myself.

Is she that tired of living to do that? Is life not important to her anymore? What about her parents and her friends?

I couldn't fathom how much pain she was subjected to for her to make that decision. To think that she would leave this world without a word and for me to see it with my own two eyes.

I haven't even taken a step to stop her and then she was gone in just seconds.

I felt cold and numb, my eyes couldn't believe what I'm seeing, her laying in her pool of blood.

My hands shook as I took a step, every step I take was like stepping on my already bruised heart and as soon as I was near her, I froze.

Tears rolled on my face unconsciously and soon, I was covered with them. I held her cold hands, I couldn't hear the noise from behind me and can only see her lifeless body.

"Hospital! Get me to the hospital please!" I yelled at the top of my lungs but no one listened, they were all looking at me with pity.

I don't want their pity, I want them to lie to me and say that she's still alive and that she'll soon be fine.

"Please!" I cried, but they didn't step further.

I've never pleaded before, never said the word please but I can say it over and over again if she would just give another breath of life.

"She's dead" I heard Zhu Rong Heng saying but I look at him with outrage in my eyes.

"She's not! She's not dead! Don't you fucking dare say it again! She's not dead-"

Then I was punched in my face, my lips splitting making me taste the blood but as if the pain was none existent and continued to embrace her cold lifeless body.

A long time passed as cries of anguish rocked my whole body, my hands continued to caress her body with tears falling on my eyes.

I looked up, my vision, all blurred and saw everything turning into dust and soon we were all alone.

I cradled her body and kissed her forehead before saying.

"Don't be afraid, I'll stay with you"

Then everything went black.