52 Hu-Hu

Earlier that morning, at 5:00 a.m.....

Hu Chuntian watched the fleeting scenes from his window in his fancy limousine, eyes lazy and tired. By his lap was his stuffed toy tiger, Hu-Hu.

Hu-Hu had been with him since he was 8 years old. It was a gift from his Uncle, who he loved more than his mother and father.

That Uncle wasn't his biological uncle, but rather his father's best friend and secretary.

Unlike his parents and the other adults around him, his Uncle never spoiled him. He would reprimand Hu Chuntian when he did something wrong and correct his ways. But he wasn't that strict either, and did not push his expectations for him to be perfect.

Hu Chuntian could feel that his Uncle loved him from the bottom of his heart, flaws and all.

But his Uncle left him.

He left this world. Hu Chuntian can remember the day he visited the hospital. Ever since, he hated the damn white building with its white walls and stone-faced doctors and nurses.

"A-Tian, why did you visit me?" His Uncle asked. "You shouldn't have visited me anymore, you'll get sad."

"Uncle!!!" Little Hu Chuntian rushed up to hug him in his bed, holding the stuffed tiger. "Why didn't you tell me you were sick!?"

"Well, you won't be able to change anything, would you?" His Uncle smiled. "So it's better for Uncle to not tell you."

"But I could change it! I could heal you using Hu-Hu's powers!" Little Hu Chuntian's fat tears flowed down his Uncle's shirt. "You said Hu-Hu can do anything with magic!"

His Uncle just sighed, his eyes both pleased and melancholic. "Yes, yes. How dumb of me to forget that you have Hu-Hu with you."

Mr. Hu stood by the door with crossed arms. "Yes, you truly are the dumb one."

Uncle turned towards Hu Chuntian's father. "Mr. Hu. How did you find me?"

Mr. Hu had just been smoking outside using his own brand of cigarettes, and smoke billowed from his mouth as he spoke. It was obvious that he was the one who influenced his son's smoking addiction.

"I had to reach out to all my sources just to know why you have gone missing. Turns out you have been in this disgusting public hospital all along. Not telling my child is understandable, but you can't even tell your friend?"

"Mr. Hu, I worry that you will have the same reaction as A-Tian does now if I did tell you." Uncle tilted his head to the side.

"Ridiculous. You think I would cry and embrace you upon finding out of your stupidity?"

Unluckily for Mr. Hu, his son snitched out on him. "Dad cried all night when he learned that you have leukemia."

"A-Tian." Mr. Hu glared at his son.

"It's true! I couldn't sleep last night because of it and I also cried and made Hu-Hu's head wet." Hu Chuntian burrowed his head on his Uncle's chest.

"Is that so? Your father had never changed, then. Always a crybaby." Uncle teased, but his voice was hoarse and weak. "You shouldn't copy him, A-Tian. You need to be a strong boy."

"I am a strong boy!" Hu Chuntian sniffed and wiped his tears away. "It's just too difficult not to cry, Uncle! Don't leave me! Don't leave me and Dad!"

Mr. Hu's expression softened at this and he kneeled beside the sick man. He tried to hide his softness with his expressionless and cold face. "You heard the child. Let me pay for you to be moved to a private hospital, maybe somewhere abroad. There's still time. It's a good thing I didn't find you too late—"

"I don't want to be indebted to you or to anyone, Mr. Hu." Uncle said. "You know that."

Mr. Hu growled from frustration, another thing that his son inherited. "Yes, but this is not the time to be stubborn."

"I'm not being stubborn, Mr. Hu. I came to accept my fate. I've been living for too long. Longer than I expected." Uncle stared blankly at the ceiling. "I had been fighting this cancer since we were in college. I never expected to live long enough to see you get married and have a child."

"I already thank the gods for giving me enough time to meet A-Tian." He patted the child's head.

Hu Chuntian's hair was still black back then, he only dyed it to be blond. It was really dark and pitch black, unlike his mother's which was slightly brown and hazel.

It matched with the man whose eyes were starting to get red and glassy. Mr. Hu looked down to avoid Uncle from seeing it. "You..... Seriously.... I hate you so much."

"Winter is coming soon. I wouldn't be around until then. I wouldn't be around you." Uncle patted Mr. Hu's head. "But A-Tian would be, so you can still enjoy the first snow with him. And all the next winters afterwards."

"You've never been around during winter and had been busy. Back in college, we always wait for the first snow at the school rooftops. Do you remember that?"

Mr. Hu slowly nodded, still bowing his head as he did start to tear up, slightly shaking.

"But could you at least spare some time to watch the first snow with your son? Promise me, Hu Dongtian." Uncle gently stroked the Hu father's hair. "That way, I could be at peace."

"I.... I promise."

Uncle smiled and turned to little Hu Chuntian. "A-Tian, Hu-Hu did all his best. But his powers are not enough. That's alright, he still has enough to protect you from bad monsters in the night. I'll let Hu-Hu save his powers for you instead of using it for me, I'm a hopeless case anyway."

Hu Chuntian shook his head. "I don't mind if I lose protection from Hu-Hu! I want him to heal you! Please, let his powers heal you!"

"Well, why don't we let Hu-Hu decide?" Uncle picked up the stuffed toy and placed it in his ear, as if it was whispering to him.

After a while, Uncle smiled apologetically. "Hu-Hu wants to keep protecting A-Tian because it was the duty bestowed upon him by the great forces of light. He's sorry, A-Tian. One day, he will use his powers to save you and someone special to you, but this isn't the time for that."

Uncle hugged both father and son closely. "I'll miss you both. But please be happy without me. That would be enough."

"Uncle! Sob! Sob!" Hu Chuntian couldn't say anything else and just continued crying his eyes out in his Uncle's arms.

Mr. Hu gripped his friend's clothes tightly as if not wanting to let go. He couldn't say anything either and felt so hopeless, his heart slowly breaking.

Uncle sighed. "Remember your promise, Hu Dongtian. Be a better father to A-Tian for my sake."

But Mr. Hu did not fulfill his promise.

After the funeral, he became even colder and distant to Hu Chuntian and his mother.

Uncle's death greatly affected both of them, and their relationship. Hu Chuntian felt that there was no point in acquiring any relationship with his father. He felt immense anger deep in his bones for being too young and not being able to do anything. He went astray into a path of delinquency and violence.

But he did not let go of the stuffed tiger either. He slept with it every night, even when he was already a grown man and it looked silly to others.

Then one day, he met someone whom he loved more than his Uncle. Whom he didn't want to let go of at all, no matter how stubborn that person is.

But that person's rejection hurt him so much that he had to cut ties with him even if he didn't want to, and it left him bitter, cold, and empty.

He now understands how his father feels.

Mr. Hu must have thought that if Uncle was gone, what's the point in feeling joy with anyone else?

And now, Hu Chuntian thought that if Mo Aini was gone, what's the point of laughing or smiling? Of feeling any other emotion other than pain?

The limo parked at the airport, and he got down. His driver carried his luggage for him. He tucked the stuffed tiger away under his coat and wore his sunglasses.

He sat in the waiting area with nothing in his mind. His whole posture was stiff and rigid. The people were scared of his ominous aura, but there's nothing to be scared about. Hu Chuntian would not hurt them.

Because it was him who was hurting deep inside.

"Flight HX195 heading to New York in 15 minutes."

Hearing the intercom, Hu Chuntian stood. He gave the stuffed tiger one last look.

"I used to believe you have powers. Uncle made me believe so. Ridiculous."

Hu Chuntian went over to the trashcan, and was about to throw the stuffed tiger into it.....

When everything went white, and all the memories he lost came rushing to him.

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"Hu Chuntian, it's lunchtime. Are you still not going to eat?"

His art teacher asked worriedly. The old woman pushed up her glasses and peered at his canvas.

"Your technique has greatly improved. But it's still the same subject. Are you not tired of him?"

"I'll never get tired of him, Ma'am." Hu Chuntian continued making strokes in the canvas to paint the familiar sanpaku eyes based on memory alone.

"It's good that you practice every day, but you need some nourishment. Why don't you speak with the other students as well? They can give you feedback, and you might find more inspiration other than this....." She tried to find a better word for 'ugly'. ".....simple young man."

"There's nothing simple about him, Ma'am." Hu Chuntian turned to his stuffed tiger by the side. "Isn't that right, Hu-Hu?"

The stuffed tiger didn't say anything, and just wrapped its hands around the holder for his paintbrushes.

"If only you would come to my dream again and tell me what you meant, I would appreciate it." Hu Chuntian sighed. "Do you need me to give you offerings? Prayers?"

The art teacher just scratched her head from this weird student that she was sure is..... not completely right in the head. She clapped her hands. "Well.... If you're feeling hungry, feel free to just leave the painting here to dry. Then later you can have your butler bring it home for you."

"I will, Ma'am."

The art teacher sighed. He really wasn't right in the head, this has been his 67th painting of the same guy. But this one seemed to be the most accurate—though she doesn't know what this guy looks like.

Hu Chuntian smiled ear to ear as he work. He had come a long way from barely drawing a stickman figure to a little bit more closer to realism.

But everytime he finished his artwork, his heart felt like it was getting crushed again.

"I miss you, Mo Aini. You've hurt me more than once now but..... I want to see you again."

------------------

Hu Chuntian's eyes widened, and he gripped the stuffed tiger tightly.

He called his father.

There was no response, he must be in a meeting. A robotic voice just said. "Please leave a message."

Hu Chuntian breathed deeply, and sent a voice message.

"Dad..." It's been a long time since he called Mr. Hu 'Dad'. "I won't be coming to the States anymore. There's someone important that I can't leave behind. I spent the whole winter and spring with him, but we haven't watched the first snow together in the rooftops yet...."

"So I'm planning to watch it with him next time, just like how you and Uncle did. I want to spend the next winter with him too.... and all the other winters for the rest of my life."

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