Chapter 1: Heaven?

It was a late night as I was driving back to my place.

11:00 PM, to be exact.

I could barely keep my eyes open. They kept trying to shut themselves closed.

I just wanted to get home to sleep.

Sure -- I drove through a stop sign, but it's the middle of the night.

What's the worst that could happen?

A truck comes out of nowhere and hits my car?

A tank passes through the empty street and runs me over?

It was late. Nobody would be driving this late. Even if they were, I would be able to accurately see them. My night vision has increased ever since I took that job, so now I felt like Batman.

I was SUPPOSED TO work an average 9-5 every day. 

Key words SUPPOSED and TO.

Most days, I stayed late. Usually around 5 or 6 hours after my shift, which sounds insane, but I need the money.

Right when I passed through the stop sign, something very, VERY bright blinds me immediately.

I looked over and out of my window.

Through the engulfing light, I could see something about to hit my car.

(Screw you, truck....!)

Everything went completely blank after that.

I felt extremely warm, like a cozy blanket had been wrapped around my entire body.

I guess you could say I felt like a turtle curled up in its shell.

To be honest, I was dead the moment I decided to drive straight through that stop sign.

No idea why this happened to me. Maybe it was because of my failures.

Or even achievements.

I had always grown up as the 'smart kid'.

Through elementary and middle school, I was more focused on grades than making friends.

 That's one thing I regret about my life.

I should have made some friends. Develop some relationships.

Instead of winning 1st place at every spelling bee and mock trial, I could have been playing Street Fighter with some kids from school.

Maybe they wouldn't even wanna hangout with me in the first place.

Damn. Now isn't the time to focus on the relationships I didn't even make!

After looking up and down, and all around, I realize I am fully nude in this... white void of a place.

Out of nowhere, some type of humanoid being materializes in front of me.

An aura radiated off of it -- I felt like this thing was fake.

"Dojyaaaan!"

I reactively jumped out of fear, falling onto my ass.

As I looked up, this... thing was dancing around like a clown.

It turned into something familiar. This kid I knew back in high-school. 

He was the class clown, as you call them. Every day, when I walked into class, he would say something like "Don't shit your pants, but the king of nerds has arrived and woken from his immortal slumber!!"

Don't even ask me why people laughed at that.

Whatever or whoever this being was -- it was trying to mock me. Why would it turn into that annoying student if it wasn't?

"W-What the hell are you?" 

That was the only thing that came out of my mouth.

As soon as I asked, it stopped laughing, and simply placed a finger over its mouth to shush me.

Before I could react, blood poured down my stomach violently. 

It had a hand through my chest, gripping my heart with crazy strength.

"Guh--"

I coughed out a small thing of blood onto absolutely nothingness.

Disappointment and all, I saw my life flash before my eyes in that moment. Why didn't that happen when I was KILLED BY A TRUCK?

I realized how much I lied to myself.

I said school was more important.

I said work was more important.

Did I not realize how depressed I was through all of it? 

No. Of course not, I was a lying scumbag!

An exaggeration, maybe, but anyone would get the point. I needed balance, not focus. I was too scared to approach people and talk to them, which can be seen as a really simple task to literally everyone, but I'm me -- and me can't talk to people.

Everyone has something to distract them from the things that disgust them.

I wasn't disgusted, though, I was scared.

Scared to even talk to someone new. Scared to even look at someone new. If I could go back and start over all again, I would!

Living like a loser wasn't one of my goals!

Wait, goals? What are my goals? No... what WERE my goals?

Yes -- I wanted to make friends, maybe even be apart of a big friend group. 

With all of my intelligence and experience in studies, I couldn't even talk to someone. I just wanted to be alone with my books.

Second chances don't exist, though.

A religion like Christianity may believe your passing spirit rises up into heaven, or lowers into the different layers of hell when you die.

Buddhism may believe in reaching a state of absolute nirvana. I guess that could just be described as being at peace with yourself.

Most wouldn't want to believe in a hard truth like nothing happens when you die. 

I believed it. 

So, why was I here? 

Some being or god just killed me before I could even communicate with it. That can't truly be real... right?

If I did have a second chance at this moment...

I'd take it.