1 Postpartum depression
Hello I'm Andrea Barroa. From Roxas Capiz Philippines.What you have read from the title will be the real happen in my life. I'm just 20 years old when I give birth to my daughter. I give normal delivery to her. I feel super blessed and curious of having a baby in my life for the first time. At the first month of being mother it was not easy but I handle it with my own. I'm happy with my husband. By the way he is 23 years old at that moment we are Ldr(Long distance relationship). It's not big deal to us because we trust and believe each other. I love him and he love me too. But then suddenly after a couple of month I give birth he change. I don't know why as I'm just busy to be a mother and a wife to him even we a re LDR I still show him how much I love him.But one day. Something sink into my mind. I just feel that he treat me like a cold. Calling me a little time. No more updating. Letting me sleep even we are mad each other. This situation he never done me before. Until July 9 I saw a picture which he is beside at a girl. They are 4 in the picture. The two man in front and he and girl at the back. I don't know what going on but still I trust and believe my man. I calm my self first then during night we chat I ask him one thing. Me:Love? Do you still love me? Him:Yes love. Why you ask? Me:nothing honey. I love you most.
That's the first lie he been done for almost 2 years we are in relationships. Since I'm a type of person who never rise my pride. I don't mind that situation and move on. After a couple days they are traveling at next city for work but he never update nor calling. Nothing. So I'm so worried because I don't what happened. Then at a night I try to call him. After a 10x of trying he answer it
Him:Yes ann?
Me:What? Ann?
I. Must hurt of what I been heard because he never call me by name. He always using love because that's our Call sign.. I keep calming my self then talk to him.
Me:why you didn't txt me nor updating me. I'm worried love. Are you OK.
Him:(take a deep breath and say) Let's end this.
Me:(Stay silence)
Him:I'm sorry ann. I can't take this anymore. I don't know what to do. I need to fix my self first. Then let's wait what will happened.
I am crying at that moment like my world are gone. I don't know what to response. I want to cry shout loud but no voice come out to my mouth. I just see my self punching the wall and hurting my self. Thats me. I don't want to hurt other. I just take it to my self.....
Me:Why? Why did you do this to me. We are not teen anymore. We are married. We have a kid. Why you choose to let us go than to continue fighting this challenges.
Him:sorry ann.
That's what the last word I heard because I feel my word crack and broke. Even I lost my energy and falling down. Then I heard my parent calling my name. Crying. And saying those positive. It's not clear to hear but before I lost my self I saw my baby sleeping with a bottle of milk on her mouth sucking it very well.. Then my self back in a normal energy. Then I walk into my baby side and keep crying. I most tired and sleep because of crying. I just find out my husband has a new one and guess what. It's also single mom. I keep crying every morning and night asking my self value. And worth. Then I just see my self one day. I'm too slim. Had a darkness at my down eye. Then everything was change. My mood are not OK. I'm so fast to be angry then I find out Im in postpartum depression. Do you believe at the age of this I handle of being mother and father to my baby. But now i can tell anyone of you that I'm OK. My baby are now 1 year old. I'm still single. But not still ready to another. I spend the rest of my life to my baby a mother and father to her.
