6 The Zombies are coming (I'm the Zombie in this situation)

She threw a rock at me.That Bitch."Get her!" I yell, my fellow zombies following my order like brainless corpses who have someone else think for them.Which I guess is the case since Zomboss and I are the only ones who can think for ourselves."DAMMIT DAVE!" The blonde-tanned Ryuko Matoi wannabe screamed as she ran back into her home, dropping some of her magic seeds on the ground and sprouting more plants in the process."THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!!!"She can scream all she wants, I actually have a job to do.Turning back to the lawn where I parked the van, I start setting up the makeshift command center, like a news station during a live broadcast.Soon the connection between the Van and the Z-mansion was stable and I called Zomboss."Hey Boss, I'm sorry to-" "WHAT ARE YOU DOING YOU DIMWIT?!" He yelled through the radio before I could finish my report."I sent you to build a base outside her house so I could get data on those plants of hers! Why the hell are you instigating a fight?!""I can explain," I said calmly, hoping my new boss would calm down."That explanation better be good or I'll be docking your pay for the week." I get paid?! I thought that this whole "I'm your boss" thing was roleplaying evil scientist stuff, I thought that with it being the apocalypse and all that money would be useless.The more you know.I explained to him why I'm sending the zombies after her."She... Threw a rock at you?" He asked dumbfounded."Yes, fucked up isn't it? I know I'm dead and I don't have a nose, but I still have feelings, you know? It hurts being discriminated against by cute girls." I continue talking."Yeah, I don't really care," Zomboss said, causing me to stop my rant about feelings and the existential question of what is life."Also," he continued, "She looks like a teenager, how old is she even? Are you flirting with kids? That's a big red flag you know. I understand that as a zombie your options for a meaningful romance are limited, but going after kids is fucked up."I sit up in my chair in front of the microphone talking to Zomboss."There's no way she's a kid. First, She's too muscular for her height and seems to be living alone, she is 18 at minimum, second, I've been dead for who knows how long, I really need to lay pipe, and I don't want to do it to a walking corpse.""You're also a walking corpse," Zomboss said, "And just use your hand if you need to,""...""...""...Yeah, I'm gonna go flirt with a corpse that doesn't look as ugly as the rest of them, I'll be back by the van in a few hours," I say as I stand up and exit the van, making sure to turn the camera and microphone towards the house of the chick who threw a rock at me.Who knew being a zombie was going to ruin my romance prospects?---------------------------Somewhere on the other side of Neighborville, Deep in the woods, a secret wizards tower glowed with purple light and a swarm of bats flew out of the single window at the top of the tower, and a loud scream could be heard following soon after.