Chapter 60: Kill em with Kindness

' Percy '

...

"Stop!" I yelled through the window.

The cops gave me an annoyed look, "Let me speak with my friends before we blow up."

The cop in the middle looked warily but the one on her right said, "Maybe we should. It's not polite to blow them up without them saying their last words."

The one the left nodded, "Yes we don't want to be impolite."

The female officer shook her head, which made it look like her head would fall of any second, and then looked up at me, "Okay, you can have a final chat with your friends."

"Thanks." I said sarcastically and turned towards my friends, "Okay this is bad."

"They are going to blow up this motel? Awesome!" Nyx cried out.

"With us inside." Thalia said looking pale.

"Why would mortals do that?" Bianca asked and as she glanced out of the window.

'Those aren't mortals.' Chaos said.

'I know.' I mumbled and turned towards my friends.

"They are not mortals or cops." I told them.

"They are not?" Zoë asked.

I shook my head, "That is a... Blemmyae."

I remember the stories Leo had told me about them, about how he and Apollo encountered them and how their silly politeness got them killed all the time.

"They are what?" Thalia asked.

"Blemmyae." Zoë said, "I should've known."

'What?" Thalia asked.

"But what are they doing here?" Zoë wondered out loud.

I knew what they were doing here, Commodus sent them to kill us. He probably gave them the bombs necessary to blow this place up.

"Can anyone explain what they are?" Thalia asked clearly annoyed.

I turned towards Thalia, "They are Blemmyae are an African tribe of headless men, their faces are on their chest."

Thalia frowned, "You're joking Kelphead."

"No, he isn't." Zoë said.

"Look at their bellies." I told Thalia.

"I already checked the rooms," Bianca suddenly said, "We are the only one in the Motel. Even Uncle Stan is gone."

"I thought his name was Charlie." Nyx said confused.

I turned to Nyx, "Can you shadow travel us?"

Nyx burped loudly and yawned, "I can't shadow travel anything, that's how tired I am."

I scowled at her, "Seriously. You stayed up all night and drank Cola? It's not alcohol or something."

"Oh, alcohol, I need to try that yet." She cried out.

"Stick to Cola." I told her and turned towards my cat.

"Can you at least turn back to a lion?" I asked.

The cat meowed and for a second his image shivered and there was a lion standing in front of me, then the image flickered and it was back to a regular cat.

"Great." I muttered.

Rebel burped.

"You poisoned my cat!" I said glaring at Nyx.

The cat pouted, and I swear he said something along the lines of, Not my fault, she began

"Why did you feed his cat Cola?" Bianca asked.

"I think we are getting sidetracked." Zoë said.

"So what do we do? Can you summon Cerberus?" Thalia asked.

"You can summon Cerberus?" Zoë asked with awe, "How?"

"Oh, he kind of adopted me, we are good friends." I told her, "But I can't summon him inside a motel room, there's not enough space.

"Bummer." Thalia muttered.

"Your time is up!" the female officer outside said.

I turned towards the window, "Do what I do." I told the others before glancing at the cops, "can I have one request?"

"No." The female one said.

"Yes." the other two said.

"Fine, what's it now?" she asked impatiently.

"Well…" I muttered trying to come up with something, "My friend here, Zoë. She wants to die while seeing the stars."

Zoë whispered, "What?"

"There are no stars you dummy." Thalia muttered.

"I mean clouds. She really likes the clouds. Especially white ones." I corrected myself.

"But we got orders to blow you up." The officer said.

I frowned, "Well, you need to kill us right? I completely understand, but why can't we die outside?"

The cop on the right frowned, "He has a point. It would not be polite to ignore the girl's final wish."

"Fine," The female officer said, "you can come outside through the front door, but I have a gun and a grenade so if you try something."

"No, we don't." I told them and turned toward my friends.

"What are you doing?" Zoë hissed.

"Exploiting their weakness. They are obsessed with politeness."

I picked up my cat and dragged Nyx to the front door.

Zoë and Bianca frowned but followed me anyway.

"Are you sure about this?" Thalia asked as she caught up with me.

"Nope, but I'll have to try this."

We walked straight through the main lobby where Nyx smashed the trophy closet without any reason and made our way outside.

We raised our hands as three policemen waited for us, guns out and aimed at our chest. No doubt they would fire before we could duck away.

They gestured us towards the parking lot where we had a better view of the clouds,

"My name is Nanette. This officer to the right is named, Bob and the one to my left is named Beany."

Beany offered me a hand while holding the detonator in his other.

"Ready to die?" Nanette said.

I scratched the back of my head, a plan came up in my mind.

"Oh, NO!" I called out.

"What's wrong?" Bob asked.

"I forgot something important." I told them.

"You did?" Nyx asked.

I nodded and turned towards Zoë and Bianca, "You guys, have you seen my sword?"

Zoë frowned, "No but it's-"

"In my room!" I called out.

Zoë gave me the what-are-you-doing? Look.

`My sword, Riptide, It's in my room, I forgot it!"

I glanced at Thalia, 'Please help me' I thought.

"Yeah!' Thalia muttered uncertain, "Kelphead always leaves his swords in the hotel room."

"Totally." Bianca said following Thalia.

"I don't get it." Nyx said.

"Excuse me but why is that important?" Beany asked scratching his fake head.

"Well…" I began, "I'm religious."

All my friends scowled at me.

"What do you mean?" Beany asked.

"I believe in the Norse gods. You would not disrespect my religion right?" I asked.

Thalia snickered but Nyx punched her and told her shut up.

"It would be disrespectful." Beany agreed.

"According to the law he has freedom of Religion." Beany told Nanette.

She nodded, "You are right, sorry for our misunderstanding."

"No problem but can I please have my sword in my hand if I am going to die? Otherwise, I can't go to Valhalla."

"Yeah, he's obsessed with that." Thalia added.

"Please?"

"Okay, you can hold your sword while I shoot you in the head." Nanette said.

Then her face turned to confusion, "But the sword is in your room." she said, understanding the problem.

"I can go get it." I offered, but Nanette shook his head, which almost fell of, "No we can't allow you to run away."

"I'll go," Boby offered.

"Thank you very much." Nanette said gratefully.

"No problem." I said and glanced at Zoë who watched the act with awe.

"Where is your room?" Bob asked.

"Room 8a." I told him, which was a total lie, in fact room 8a did not even exist.

Bob left, and we were left with the two Blemmyae who were pointing guns at us.

After five minutes Bob came out of the door, without a sword, and he said, "Excuse me but I can find your sword."

"Why don't you go help your friend?" I told Beany who held the detonator.

He nodded and was about to follow Beany inside but the female officer stopped him, "No, I'll go inside. You can't blow up this Motel if you are inside." she said.

"Oh, stupid, I forgot. Thanks for reminding me." He said, and Nanette went with Beany inside.

'Want to try and take out the last one?' Nyx asked.

'No,' I glanced at the Blemmyae who held his gun in his right hand pointed at Bianca and in the right hand a detonator device.

"You know," I told the last Blemmyae, "It is rude to leave your two friends to do all the work."

His face filled with shock, "You are right."

"Why don't you go inside too?" Bianca asked.

The Blemmyae shook his head, "No, who hold the detonator when I'm inside?"

"I'll watch over it." Nyx said, and she stepped forward, "Trust me, sir, I'm good with explosives."

The Blemmyae looked skeptically at Nyx, "Are you sure you are experienced?"

"It's not nice to ask." Zoë said with shock.

Nyx stepped backwards and brought her hands to her heart, "Oh my gods."

"She has a low self-esteem, saying things like that make her feel depressed." Thalia explained.

"Really." Bianca added.

"Sorry, my excuses I did not mean to offend you, of course you can take the detonator."

He handed Nyx the detonator.

"Well I'm going inside to help my colleagues search your sword." he said and entered the motel.

My friends and I were grinning wildly.

"Did that work?" Zoë asked with awe.

'You got better at acting.' Hemera told me.

"Thanks." I said out loud.

"That was interesting." Zoë told me before she asked "So are we going to drive away right now?"

Nyx grinned widely, "I know something better."

"Noooo!" We all yelled but it was too late.

She pressed the detonator.

The ground began to rumble and shake, we all stared at shock at Nyx, then at the Motel.

A loud bang came from inside, followed by more bangs. Fire erupted from the windows, glass scattered and the walls crack.

Parts of the building collapsed and dragged more parts down.

Then Nyx pressed again.

The entire ground right under the motel began to sink, the parking lot and all began to crumble down into the ground like it was a giant sinkhole.

When all the dust cleared up it was like a meteor struck the motel and dragged the motel with it.

We got closer to the edge and were looking at a 10 foot deep crater.

Our spider fell into the hole was well and was now laying on the remains of the roof.

"There goes your car." I said to Thalia.

"Oh, no, this is your car. It was your plan." she said then she glared at Nyx, "Seriously? You blew up the entire Motel? What about the mortals?"

Nyx yawned heavily, "Sorry but Bianca said there were no mortals in the building and even if there were mortals you have to see it in perspective. We literally caused a terrorist attack in Washington DC, this is nothing."

Meow Rebel agreed.

"But how do we go west now?" Zoë wondered, "Our car is ruined, and the trains don't come here often."

"REEETTTT!" We heard behind us, and we turned around to face a boar, which would not been scary wasn't it for the size.

The boar stood 40 yards away from us on the main road that led out of town, which was too close.

He was 30 feet tall, his tusk were the size of a canoe and his red eyes burned with hate.

Did I tell you it did not look happy?

"The Erymanthian boar!" Zoë yelped.

"What?" Nyx asked yawning.

"A boar, he was sent to help us." Zoë said grim, which confused me. Last time Pan had sent this boar to help us but this time I had not the whole, nature-comes-to-life experience.

"How will this help us?" Bianca asked.

The boar agreed it did not want to help us, in fact, the opposite.

It charged straight at us.

The distance between us and the boar went from 40 yards to 20 yards within a second.

The next scene proves how I could act faster than I think.

My friends scattered to the right and left.

I thought by myself, 'Ice, I can turn the snow into ice and make it slip.'

I aimed my hands at the snow and wielded it to harden and turned into ice.

It worked.

The boar slipped forward, unable to get a grip on the ground.

I think I can explain what happened best with using a metaphor, you know what happens when a car suddenly hits the brake while he's driving at full speed on ice?

The boar slid at full speed in my direction and I was hit by the flank before I could think, shit.

I was hit and was slung in the air, over the hole.

Mid-air I managed to turn around, only to see I was crashing down a pine tree.

Without thinking, I stretched my hands towards the tree and closed my eyes.

I crashed into it, but instead of dying or breaking my bones on impact it felt soft.

I opened my eyes to find I was surrounded by green needles and branches.

Then I realized the tree had caught me, the branches and needles were wrapped around my like a cocoon.

"Thanks." I muttered.

The tree released me from its grip, the branches folded back to their normal position and I fell down in a pile of snow that lay on the bottom of the tree.

I coughed a few times and when I got up to the snow I was facing an angry Zoë.

"You idiot!" she yelled, "you could've died."

I laughed, "Well, glad I didn't." then I looked around to find where the boar was, "Where's the boar?"

She pointed at the hole in front of us, "You did take him out, he's now on the bottom of the crater, unconscious."

"So my plan did work." I said with a smirk.

"Don't get cocky." she said and turned around.

I got out of the snow and made my way over to the hole. On top of our spider lay the Erymanthian boar, knocked out.

Thalia was already sitting on top it.

Zoë jumped down the hole and I was about to follow her when Rebel suddenly popped up and meowed.

I looked at him, "What's up?"

The cat meowed again, I knelt down to face it.

"What are you trying to say?" I asked.

He suddenly leaped around me and touched my backpack with his paw.

"What's with my backpack?" I asked confused.

Meow! It said.

'It wants you to take of the backpack.' Chaos said.

'Yeez, thanks.' I said and took off the backpack.

Rebel patted it with his head.

Suddenly my backpack glowed white and Rebel Meowed loudly.

When the light faded my backpack had changed, It still looked the same except for the extension on the back.

There was some kind of baby carrier attached to my backpack.

"You're not a baby." I told Rebel.

He did not react but leaped onto my backpack and disappeared.

He vanished, no bang, no flash.

Just like that.

The backpack had also restored itself to its normal form.

"Where's my cat?" I wondered out loud.

I studied my backpack, opened it to search for Rebel inside but he was gone.

'Chaos what happened?' I asked concerned.

'Well, your cat is dead.' Chaos said without laughing.

"What?"

'She's kidding.' Hemera said quickly, 'Rebelis inside the backpack.'

'I can't see him.' I said worried.

'Well, he has his own personal space.' Hemera said.

'O, So how do I call it?' I asked.

'Well, you can try to call his name, but it is a cat so there's a big chance he's sleeping.' Hemera said like it was nothing out of the ordinary.

'You wanted a Nemean lion as pet.' Chaos said accusingly, 'All pets come with their peculiarities.'

I silently thanked Blackjack for not traveling inside my backpack.

"Percy! Stop gazing at your backpack." Thalia yelled from the boar's back, "This train can leave any moment."

"Sorry." I said apologetically and got up.

I leaped onto the destroyed roof of our motel and made my way over to the boar.

Bianca was looking skeptical at the giant boar while Zoë was passing around it, studying it.

"We can safely drive on it." she said finally.

"I don't get it, this thing almost got Percy killed, why is this help?" Bianca asked.

"It was sent to help us." Zoë said and her expression told me, don't ask me or I'll kill you.

I nodded, "Well does it have automated steering?" I wondered.

"It should." Zoë replied like it was an ordinary question.

The head of the boar stirred.

"We should get going." Thalia reminded us from the back.

"Where's Rebel?" Nyx asked.

"For some reason he can teleport to my backpack to sleep. Don't ask me why and how."

Nyx nodded and climbed up onto the Boars back and leaned against Thalia, "I'm going to sleep, wake me up if we are there." she said and closed her eyes.

"Nyx?" Thalia asked disturbed, but Nyx was already snoring heavily.

We all got up the boar's back.

"Well now we are pig cowboys." I joked.

The boar did not like my joke. It suddenly woke up.

"Reeeet!" the boar shrieked.

"Hold on!" Zoë yelled.

With one jump the boar leaped out of the hole and landed on the main road.

"Here we go." I muttered without much enthusiasm.

The boar charged out of town.