Stranger Danger

I am not good-looking. Or at least not good-looking enough to be saved from the brink of death, but apparently this a new experience for both of us the kidnapper didn't have the foresight to get anything to kill me with. 0/10 kidnapping. Would not be kidnapped again. Now don't get it twisted. I am not a masochist who is begging this random woman to crush me between her thighs or whatever. I am a simple man. I was just stabbed and that hurt a lot. Almost as much as bleeding out. So if I am going to die once more I would prefer it to be quick and painless. Granted my kidnapper doesn't look like she'll fulfill my wish for a painless death. With long thin black hair and eyes that are just a bit too wide. And a wardrobe that hasn't seen the light outside of the wardrobe since the 1990s. And so fueled by my fear. And my patience drastically deteriorated. I ask point-blank "If you're going to do something to me just do it quickly please". And do you want to know what the lady said in response? No, you don't want to know but I am going to tell you anyway. She Frickin laughed. Like Wicked Witch of the West. Yeah, I knew this was where I would die. She then takes a few steps back. I don't know. Admire her next meal. It's then that I realized that this lady definitely is not human. She seems to be changing. shifting. Into different body types. Race. Even Her hair can't seem to decide what it will look like. Flip-flopping between a French braid and a bold pixie. The only thing that stays the same is her wide black eyes. If I look into them long enough I can see the Galaxy. It's so overwhelming I have to close my eyes. Then she slowly leans in. Her nose practically touched my cheek. Then she spoke three words that made me cringe to my very core. "What's shady? is my outfit that brutal?"