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path of despair

This is a story. But you most likely already expected that since everything is a story. But this particular story is about quite the topic. Depair. Quite the word isn’t it? Despair can lead to a lot of things. Murder, suicide, hatred, depression. and you will see it all happen to our one and only mc. This is about the story from one of the most powerful people in the world. And yet, this one is longing for nothing more than death. Despair has already overtaken him and he will tell you why. The past, before everything happened. All kinds of horrors and a whole lot of other things. This is the story of the one known as the essence king. ………………………………………………………… If you read this, thank you. as you can probably see from my chapters, I aint the best writer. I just do this for fun but I’m also quite hopeful for this. Except suicide of course. He would’ve been quite hally if that happened ‘to him’. There are chances that I will not upload for some periods of time since I’m still in school and work and stuff but I doubt that that will be a problem for most since this isn’t exactly a masterpiece of a story. Again, thank you for giving this shitty story a chance.

Dries186 · Fantasy
Not enough ratings
20 Chs

chapter 17 admissions (2)

~couple of minutes earlier

I was getting tired of this line. I have been standing in it for like two hours already. And unlike the people who play games on their smartwatch to pass the time, I didn't.

Why? Well, because I don't have one. I spend nearly all my time training and never needed it before so I never asked for one from mister Silverheart. And it seems I'm regretting that decision now.

Instead, I just kept practicing my mana control. Right now, I could feel the mana in the air very clearly. But feeling and controlling are very different things. As I am right now, I can barely make the particles move around.

I heard about some mages using the mana in the air to form spells instead of the mana inside their body. And of course, I wanted to be able to do this as well.

Why? If you use the mana in the air, you won't waste your own mana. This means you can last much longer in battle and it also has another benefit.

For mana users, they have affinities. And they are only able to use the affinity they posses. But if you use the mana in the air, you can use all kinds of affinities.

This is because, when you take mana into your core and refine it, it immediately becomes the mana of your affinity.

But the mana particles in the air are still unrefined. This means that they will remain at their original affinity and if you use it then you also use a different affinity than your own.

Of course, it is still easier to manipulate the mana particles that are connected to your own affinity.

And what was my affinity? Of course it is the coolest there is. Darkness. I don't know why everyone likes bright things in this world, I prefer dark colors. And darkness is so cool.

It has a whole variety of uses. You can manipulate it's shape, you can make it similar to other affinities and some can even raise the dead. Not that I'm planning on ever doing that.

But it's quite the hated affinity. The reason for that is because it's very similar to demonic energy. And in this world, there are many demon haters, or racists if you would call them.

I don't really understand why the demons are such a hated race. I mean, sure we are at war but how many times have we been at war with ourselves? Pretty hypocritical I say.

And what does it matter what kind of affinity one has. It's not like it changes the person. A person with a fire affinity can be a cool-headed person while a someone with a water-affinity could be hotheaded.

People and their stereotypes are pretty annoying. I don't care about things like race, gender, affinity and looks. I just don't like most people in general. Not that I hate them, I'm just more of a loner.

Though I hoped I could change that here. I really want some friends.

'Finally, I'm at the end of the line.'

I was at my patience ends. Two hours. I had been waiting for TWO HOURS! Do you know how boring that is? Well I'll tell you, it's very boring.

"Next, Alan… Silverheart?" I heard the person taking the admissions say my name. But it was clear he was confused about my last name. Not that I blame him.

I stepped forward as a response. "Yes that would be me."

He looked up and down, inspecting my body. He mainly looked at my hair and eyes. I guess he was wondering if I truly was from the Silverheart family.

"You. Are you part of the great Silverheart family? But your hair and eye colours don't match."

"Sigh"

I couldn't help but sigh. I'm pretty sure the news of my adoption should have spread. After all, something like this couldn't possibly be kept hidden.

"Indeed I am. I have been adopted by mister Sylveeart about a month ago. But that doesn't matter here, does it? So we should go on with this."

The receptionist looked at me as if trying to remember something. And a few seconds later I saw his eyes lit up in realization. And it quickly grew to annoyance.

'Ah so this is that kid. I heard rumors about him. They said he was some complete psychopath who abused his power. And apparently he was also really weak. I don't understand how someone like this could be adopted by Reynold Silverheart. He must have some dirt on him.'

Of course the receptionist had heard about him. But most of what he heard were rumors spread by the elders. And of course, the elders spread very bad information about Alan.

So now, basically every teacher already disliked him before they even met.

But Alan didn't know about any of this. But he didn't find the gaze thrown at him weird. It was something he expected.

Why would he expect it?well, even if he had been adopted, he was still used to his prior life. Everytime he entered the streets, he could feel the scrutinizing gazes on him. That's why he thought it was just normal to be looked at like that.

"Alright kid, put your hand on this orb and channel some energy into it." He pointed towards a glowing orb in front of him.

'Seems expensive.'

I didn't know what it was but I just followed instructions. Moving my hand towards the orb, I grabbed it slighlty and channeled some of my mana into it.

After a couple of seconds the orbs colour changed to a dim yellow colour.

'I knew it! The rumors were true, this guy is pathetic. I don't understand why the rank 4 hero would ever adopt trash like him.'

The receptionist had already confirmed his suspicions. The orb in front of him showed someones rank.

White - G rank

Yellow - F rank

Orange - E rank

Green - D rank

Blue - C rank

Pink - B rank

Purple- A rank

Red- S rank

Black- SS rank

Humanity has never had a SSS ranker yet so they don't know the colour for it yet. And while the colour would show what rank someone was at, the brightness of the light would show a persons subrank.

And in Alan's case it was very dim, showing him as a F- rank.

'There is no point in letting him do the physical exam. I'll just put him into last place.'

"You can go now."

The receptionist eagerly dismissed me which left me confused. Mister Silverheart told me that I'd first have to do the physical exam before I could be dismissed.

"Ehm sorry sir. I thought that I had to do the physical exam first."

I was pretty confident in getting a good rank. My rank may be low but I could easily get a proper rank in the academy with the physical exam. I'd be pretty screwed if I couldn't enter it.

"You can't participate in the physical exam. Now leave."

'What? What kind of bs is that?'

"Why can't I participate in the physical exam?" I said, my tone colder than before. I was getting annoyed.

The receptionist on the other hand just threw a mocking gaze at me. "Why? You're rank is the lowest so you are the weakest. There is no reason to let you waste my time and do the physical exam. Now scram before I lose my patience."

To say I was perplexed would be an understatement. What kind of nonsense was that? My rank was the lowest so I was the weakest?

I was a firm believer of ranks not being everything. And my fight with Sylvia was clear proof of that.

"But sir, that doesn't sound fa~"

I tried to argue again but this time he didn't even let me finish.

"Shut up kid. You have two options right now. Either you keep arguing and I make sure you won't get to enter the academy or you will just leave and take the theory exam."

'Ah, it feels so good to be able to talk down on a Sylverheart, even if it is an adopted one.'

I could see the receptionist clearly didn't care about my complaints looking at his mocking behavior.

I came to the conclusion that I just had to obey. I couldn't risk not entering the academy just so my ranking would be a little higher.

I left the line which I had been standing in for about two hours, apparently for nothing. To be honest, that was what annoyed me the most. Do you know how boring those two hours were?

But yeah basically, I was cooked. I got put into last place on the physical exams. And I will surely get last place in the theory exams. So that that means I'll be last place in the overall rankings.

'Wait wait wait. Maybe I'm not screwed yet. Perhaps they'll just put questions about combat in the exam. After all, this academy was created to create soldiers for humanity.'

If that were the case, then I'm safe. After all, my intelligence may be just a mere D rank, but my BQ was a whopping A rank. I doubt anyone in this academy had such a high BQ.

'I'll surely get rank 1 in the theory exams. I mean, it sounds only logical that the theory exams would be about combat theory right? After all, this is a combat oriented academy.'

With my newfound confidence, I sat down on a nearby bench. Unfortunately, I'd have to wait for another two hours before the theory exams would take place.

I doubted that I could swing my sword around so I just returned to practicing my mana control.

As of right now, I could freely control mana anywhere inside my body. But my control over the mana in the air was terrible.

I can barely move the small particles in the air. And I can't even slighlty move the white ones, it feels like they repulse me. Must have to do something with my own affinity.

Speaking about my affinity, I guess it's pretty obvious but my affinity is darkness. How cool is that?! I mean, who doesn't like darkness the best?

But I guess affinities are really important. Though I am unable to control light mana in any slight form, I can move the darkness mana pretty well.

If I were to try really hard, I could even make a small shape with it in the air. But I can't do much with that right now.

I looked around the room a bit. This sight never ceased to amaze me. With mana vision, or at least that's what I liked to call it, I could see the mana in the air. And to say it was beautiful would be an understatement. It just looked astonishing.

But right now I noticed something else, something I hadn't really noticed before since I hadn't been close to any kind of nature the last month.

The lobby I was in right now was designed with some natural environment. I don't know why they would do that, perhaps aesthetic.

But I could see it now. The mana particles are in greater number in their natural habitat. In the air were green particles, air mana. On the ground there were brown particles, earth mana. And there were many other colours such as blue, red and yellow but they were just spread out. I came to the conclusion that it was like that because there was no natural habitat for them close by.

But I noticed one other type of mana gathered in some spaces. The dark mana. They tended to be closer to the shadows.

I focused more on one of the shadows close to me. I tried to feel it through the dark mana and control. The more I tried, the closer I came.

After about half an hour I could slightly change the shape of the shadow, seemingly defying physics. But that wasn't really useful right now.

'Think. What can you do by controlling the mana in the shadow. I can't make it tangible, or at least not yet. The most I can do with changing it's shape is to throw my enemy off or something but I doubt that would work very well.'

Thinking had never been my strong suit. I was desperate to find a new way to become stronger, after all I just got screwed over by that dickhead.

I noticed my current thinking wasn't really helping so I decided to use my past thinking. How I used to live before.

'What was my strategy in the pits again? It's feels like it's been years since I last entered.'

It already felt like so long ago that since I entered the pits. Happiness really makes time fly by. But right now I didn't need happiness.

'Now that I think about it, I didn't really need any startegy the last two years I spent in the pits. I was already decimating any opponent by then. So what did I do before that?'

I can't say it enough but I hate thinking. It's just a lot of trouble.

'Wait. That's right! Thinking was too much trouble for me. Strategizing was too much trouble for me. I didn't think nor did I strategize. I just did. Adapt and evolve. That was how I survived. There is no time to think. There is no time to strategize. The person who adapts and evolves will survive, that's all there is.'

I remembered my way of survival. Adapt and evolve. As long as you do this, you will survive. It will be you who wins, not the strongest nor the fastest.

Now let's go into the first part. Adapt. To change into what you need to be.

'That's right, why didn't I think of this before?'

I came to a realization. What if I don't control the mana in the air, but in my body. Not just the body fortification that I talked about before.

What if I make the mana inside of me extremely similar to the mana of the shadows. And then put a slight layer over my skin. Wouldn't the shadows consider me to be one of their own?

If that was so, then didn't that mean that I could just enter the shadows.

But that was easier said than done. You see, not all dark mana is the same. They flow in different manners, in different speeds and in different sizes.

And to fool the shadows into thinking that I was part of them, I had to copy these exact things.

So of course I failed, a lot.

But, after trying for about an hour on just my hand. I did it.

'Okay. I'm pretty sure that the mana is exaclty like the mana in the shadow. So let's just..'

Though it probably wasn't really smart to do, I just stabbed my hand towards to shadow. I was a simple man really.

And to show me that I wasn't just a simple man but also a genius, my hand passed through the shadow.

"I'm a genius."