SIX

Sunday morning..

I can hear the birds singing their usual arrangement of notes. Well, it's only 6:30 in the morning. The time when taking a bath is such a hard thing to do especially when you're not used to cold waters. But, taking a bath is one of the things that I really have to do especially during Sundays. I stretched my arms as I try to convince my body to wake up. Luckily, my body is in his cooperative state now, so I was able to get out of bed as fast as I could. I went directly to my cabinet, picked my newly washed pants, a polo shirt, socks, undergarment, and a handkerchief. I also picked my toiletry as I head towards my door and eventually towards the bathroom. The house looks deserted during this time, but I am pretty sure that mom is wide awake by now. She's not a late comer and she's never been. As I walk towards the bathroom, I saw the lights turned on and I can hear the shower. Someone must be in there. Suddenly, I remembered that my brother will be going ahead of us this morning so it must be him who's in the bathroom. So I waited for like 20 minutes until my brother went out of the door.

"You're next." He said.

"Alright." I said.

I immediately went inside the bathroom and spent for like 15 minutes to take a splashy bath. Upon going out of the bathroom, I saw my mother cooking some bacon and eggs. The smell of bacon awakened my hungry stomach.

"Goodmorning mom." I greeted with a smile.

"Good morning too Ian." Mom said.

"What time will be the arrival of our service?" I asked

"I think, by 8am or earlier than 8." Mom said.

"Oh, I'd better fixed myself then." I said

Mom didn't say anything. She just focused in cooking the bacons and eggs.

I headed toward my room to prepare myself. I was thinking that, what if mom sensed that I have something towards Abigail? Would she be against it? I have these questions in mind as I wear my clothes and spray on some perfume. Well, this is what I feel. So, whether mom is with it or against it, it won't change. Besides, I am not doing anything bad or anything that could damage anyone or anything at all. As I look at myself in the mirror, I begin to smile as I feel the time for us to be sitting beside each other is drawing near. I took several deep breaths and a final check on how I look. After that, I fixed my things. I usually bring a backpack with me even though I am not bringing a lot of things during Sundays. I only bring my devotional notebook, pen, charger, Bible and a coin purse. After I saw that my things are all fixed and ready, I went out of the room and headed towards the dining room to have my breakfast. Mom was there and she's already eating her breakfast. She used to eat before she takes a bath whenever she has to go somewhere. While me, I am used to take a bath first, fix myself and my things, and when all things are already done, that will be the time that I will eat my breakfast. We finished breakfast without even talking about something because mom seems to be rushing a little bit so that when the service arrives, she's already ready. I mean, every one of us is already ready. It only took me 5 minutes to finish my breakfast. Believe me, I am not rushing myself knowing that my things are already fixed and I don't have anything to worry. Oh, there's still one thing that I have to worry, the dishes. After washing the dishes, I put them all in the dish rack and I went to the porch to wait for the service. At the porch, I sat on a chair and looked toward the gate, hoping that in a few minutes the service will arrive. I am excited; I know you can feel it as you read these lines. I am excited to see Abigail, euphoric enough to sit beside her. My heart beats fast as euphoria strikes me. But, I almost jumped to my feet when I heard a blowing horn. It must be the service. It must be it. I stood up and saw that it's not the service. Disappointed as I am, I sat down again. After a few moments, a horn blew again but this time, I didn't bother myself to stand to look at it because it could be someone else's car again. But when dad called me and my mom, I realized that it's already the service. So I stood up, went down the stairs and there she was, Abigail, sitting on the front seat. I kissed dad goodbye even though I know that mom is still upstairs.

"Where's your mom?" Dad asked.

"Upstairs, she'll be going down in a few moments dad. I'll go to the service first."I said as I rush toward the gate.

"Hello Ian Good morning." Mrs. Stevenson greeted.

"Hello Mrs. Stevenson. Good morning too." I said.

I quickly looked away from Mrs. Stevenson's eyes and went to the front seat area where Abigail was sitting.

"Hey. Good morning." I said as I climb up the front seat

"Hey. What's good in the morning?" she said.

That was the time that I saw her face without a smile. She's frowning. There should be a reason why. For a few seconds, I hesitated to ask. But since that her smile-less face really bothers me, I set aside my hesitation and asked her.

"Is there any problem that you're going through right now? Any bad dreams? Did someone say something bad towards you?" I asked continuously.

"I don't have any problem Ian." She said plainly.

"I don't believe you and I know you're not forcing me to believe. But it's just. . . unbelievable." I said while I flash a half-inch smile.

"You know what? I don't know how you can sense if someone has a problem or what. Alright, yeah, I do have a problem and it's about my grades at school." She said slowly almost inaudibly.

"Did you fail?" I asked while looking intently in her eyes

"No. I never had a failing grade. Let's just say that my mom has a high standard and I wasn't able to meet her range this time. She told me that I am not studying well even though she knew it totally that every night, I spent a lot of time just to read and read and read." She said.

I remained silent. But when I saw that tears are forming in her eyes, I felt a breaking pain inside me. I handed her my handkerchief.

"I think you should wipe those tears. No one should see you or your eyes like that." I said softly

"You're such a good friend Ian. Thanks." She said with a smile

That smile. That smile that I've been thinking all night long. It struck me hard this time that I wasn't able to say a word back to her for a few seconds. After I recovered from an unexpected shock, I finally said welcome.

"That's what friends are for. Right?" I said.

She smiled again as she looks straight into the windows of my soul.

There is something in the way she looks at me. It's not about if she has feelings for me but it's about the feeling of seeing her eyes looking straight to mine. I don't know why I feel stunned every time she'll look at me. That in every smile she flashes in front of me, I feel like heaven (though I've never had that damn chance to be there or even have a taste of it.)

After a little while, Mom came in. I can see her eyes snatched a look at me and Abigail. She then talked with the Stevenson's. Finally, after a minute or two, the Avon family arrived. Oh, I haven't informed you about the Avon family. Well, the Avon family consists of 6 members. Mrs. Avon, Andrea Avon Wellworth 25 (Eldest), Hyacinth Avon Springfield 20 (Second), Chrysantha Avon, 16 (Youngest), John Wellworth (Andrea's husband), and Danny Springfield (Hyacinth's Live-in partner). They hitched up in the service and that was the time when the driver started the engine and set out. Mom waved good bye to dad and so did I.

"Are you feeling okay now?" I asked Abigail who remained silent as the service had its way.

"Yeah." She said plainly.

"I hope so." I said with a slight tone of sadness.

She nodded. So I decided to open a topic.

"You know what; my mom has also a high standard when it comes to grades. She doesn't want me to have a score of 80 or 85. She wanted me to always have a 90 and up score." I said.

She looked at me. ���Really? That's such a high standard. My mom ain't like that. If I get 85, it's already fine." She said.

"Yeah. That's true. I don't wanna compare my mom with your mom okay? It's just if you're pressured with your mom's standard, so how much more in the case of my mom?" I said.

"I was even deprived of playing with my friends though not all the time but most of the time. There's even a time when I asked myself if this is what childhood life really is. Because as far as I know, childhood is more about enjoying life with friends and as a kid. But in my family, what I expected about childhood turned out to be different." I added with a slight shaking tone of voice.

"That was. . .sad. I never thought that your situation is worse than mine. Well, thanks." She said.

"Thanks for what?" I asked curiously.

"I know you shared a bit of your life just to pacify me and make me realize that there'll always be someone who has a life much worse than mine in some specific aspects. That's why I said thank you." She said.

I laughed, knowing that she's right. "You can always read through my mind huh?" I said.

"Girls are good at that thing Ian." She said and smiled while looking straight at the road.

"But not always right?" I said.

"Of course. We are not gods in order for us to know every speck of thought in everyone's minds." She said sarcastically.

"Alright. Can we be friends Abigail?" I asked.

I know I asked a foolish question. I even don't have any idea why I asked this question. So I just put my stare at the road as I wait nervously for her response.

"Yes of course, we can. Actually we are friends already. To be honest, I don't talk or share stories with a person that I don't treat as a friend." She said.

"I mean. Can we be close friends?" I said nervously.

Now I am really careless with this question. I don't know if she will answer positively or negatively.

"Close friends?" she asked, maybe shocked.

". . . Yeah." I said and flashed a hesitant smile.

She wasn't able to speak for a minute. She put her face down and took some breaths and looked up again.

"Yes, why not?" she said

"Really?" I said.

"Do you want me to change my mind?" she asked with a smile.

"No."

We both laughed and smiled at each other as we look at each other's eyes. At the tip of my tongue another set of words are forming but I think it's not yet the right time for me to say it or maybe I don't have the guts to say it in verbally. Crazy and desperate as I am, I called mom and asked her if I can borrow her phone. Luckily, she allowed me to.

"Do you have a phone?" I asked

"Yes why?" she asked

I can feel droplets of sweat forming in my forehead as I heard her ask me "why". I began to feel hesitant of if I will or will not continue what I am going to say. But later on, after a few seconds, I decided to say it.

"Can I have your phone number?" I said.

She laughed.

"Can you wipe those things in your forehead first?" she asked as she pointed her fingers to my forehead. I know what she means. She wants me to wipe these droplets of sweat in my forehead. I don't wanna let her know that she's the reason why I have these droplets in my forehead. When I'm finally done wiping my forehead dry, she gets the phone from my hand and encoded a series of numbers. After she'd encoded some numbers, she handed back the phone.

"You can text me in that number. You can even call me." She said.

"Abigail. . ." I said

"What is it Ian?"

"Ahmmm. . . nothing." I said.

"You're hiding something. C'mon tell me" she said

She looked at me as if she's waiting for an answer or for a secret to be unveiled.

"Nothing." I said

"I'm waiting" she said

"Just nothing. I just want to call your name."

"Don't be shy." She said

"They said that it's a no no when a man makes a woman wait for so long. And as I can notice, you're making me wait." She said.

"Okay. You're. . .beautiful" I said.

"Okay let's put it this way. Since you have a phone with you and so do I, just send it to me." She said.

"Okay" I said.

I begin to unlock to phone as my impulsive nature tells me not to waste any time. I begin to type the words, "I think I'm inlove with you". I pressed send and deleted the record in the messages app.

A phone rang. It's her phone, I think. I'm starting to feel nervous. Regretting what I just did. But I can't turn back time, I already sent it. Whatever the outcome may be, then so be it.

She reached for her pocket, opened and her phone and. . .

"Ian. What's this?" she said.

I remained still and silent.

"Ian I am asking you." She said

I remained silent.

"Ian." She said.

"What is it?" I said

"What is this? You're in love with me?" she asked.

"Y. .y. . . y. . .yess" I said

She laughed. "Your joking me." She said

"No I'm not." I said

"Ian. You're joking. I'm sure of it." A sudden seriousness became evident in her face as she say these words.

"I'm afraid not. What I just said is true and I'm not forcing you to believe it. I just wanted my mouth to say it." I said.

She paused for a while, maybe finding the right words to say.

"Ian, if ever you're serious with what you just told me earlier, I think you know the possible effects if you continue having that feelings for me." She said.

"Ian, your mom will surely be against on how you feel towards me. We're still young. We're only 12 years old and for sure, a lot of people will be against us if they will know that we have feelings for each other." She said, and paused abruptly as if something is amiss.

"What?" I asked.

I never expected those words to come out of her mouth. Because she just said it that it's not only me, but the two of us, having feelings for each other. As my eyes shows astonishment from her statement, I can see that she felt a little bit embarrassed.

"Abigail. . . am I right with what I've heard? That. . . you have. . . feelings for me. . .?" I said slowly and carefully as I try to look in her eyes.

"Yes." She said.

"But I am afraid. I am not afraid of what my aunts or mom will say. I am afraid in your part. Your family might be against us and the both of us may end up opposed by almost everyone." She added.

"They can't do anything Abigail. They can't." I said, trying to assure her.

"So what do you want? What do you plan to do?" She asked me.

"I don't know. As of now, we keep these things between the two of us. But if ever they'll know about this, we'll just hold each other." I said.

"I love you Ian." She said.

I was shocked when she said that. It sounds so genuine, sweet, captivating and soothing. This is the first time that I heard those words coming from the person I dream about. It feels like the earth stopped in its orbit. I know it's too fast and too early for us to have these feelings. I don't know what will happen tomorrow. But one thing I know, I won't let go of her. Though I'm young, age is not a limit as long as loving someone truthfully is concerned.

"I love you too Abigail." I replied. Then she held my hand.