9 Chapter 1.8 - Outburst

There was no one inside the class, it was just me and the other person who stood right in front of me. He had grabbed my arm right before I could stab him with a compass. At first I was surprised by how strong his grip strength was.

It goes without saying that I tried to free myself almost instantly, but to no avail. However, everytime I attempted to move he would grip my hand even harder than before. The compass that was in between our hands was causing immense pain, as the corner of a handle was digging deeper and deeper into my fingers. It wasn't too long before I could barely stand the pain.

"Ow, it hurts! Aozaki-kun, let me go."

But it was at that moment I noticed something that sent chills down my spine.

I went too far.

The compass that I was holding... it didn't miss his hand. It had already penetrated through his left palm, deep enough to come out from the other side. Fresh warm blood was seeping out of his grip throughout the gaps of his fingers. There was no room for doubt about that being unthinkably painful.

I, then had realized how childish of a person I was to inflict such a damage upon Aozaki-kun. I only wanted to stay isolated, to make him stop approaching me. That's why I tried to intimidate him by doing this.

And thus, I, Horikita Suzune, ended up doing something that I regretted with all my heart.

However, something was not right. He was not behaving like a normal human being.

Instead of acting like the other's who would undoubtedly be crying or screaming in agony, he remained in absolute silence, not as far as to even grunt. His face did not twitch even the slightest in pain. His expression was calm, composed and collected, as if nothing happened.

On the other hand, he kept increasing the strength of his grip of that hand. The pain was getting unbearable with every single second that passed. At some point, I couldn't feel anything but pain. My face twisted in agony.

As he noticed this, he had finally stopped putting force on his grip. I was relieved of his monstrous grip strength. But before I could say anything, he said...

"Stop."

He finally spoke, but... he sounded different than the way he usually did.

He spoke with a cold and sharp voice, like a sharp edged knife crafted from an icicle. The monotone of his voice that contained no emotion, was now filled with anger, darkness and intimidation. This one word all by itself shared the message, "this is serious.".

His voice sent chills down the deepest corners of my spine.

"What?" I asked, confused.

But when I looked at him, all of my thoughts automatically came to standstill.

There was an incomprehensible darkness surrounding his face. His dark brown eyes, blank like an empty void, glaring at me with the sharpest and narrowest glare I could ever imagine. I felt like he could tear my soul apart into the tiniest bits if I were to show even the slightest of movement.

I could only wait for his answer in silence. He parted his lips.

"Don't call me by that name, ever."

That name? Aozaki?

I became even more confused. I wondered why he didn't want me to call him by his family name. Did he perhaps hate that?

"Why do you not want me to call you by that name?" I asked.

"Because I told you. Nothing more, nothing less."

"I don't understa--" I was cut off mid sentence.

"Am I understood?"

"Wha--?"

"AM I UNDERSTOOD?" he asked.

No matter how much I tried, not a single word would come out from my mouth. I couldn't even move a mussel to nod, like I was paralyzed.

A person like Levent-kun, who I thought was nothing more than just an average Joe, had put me under such immense pressure. It became painfully clear that I must've been too naïve with my judgement on his personality.

"sigh"

All of a sudden he moved our arms toward the other direction. Then he sluggishly raised his other hand.

I initially thought that he would hit me, so I frantically shielded myself with my other arm. But seemingly, he didn't. Instead, he was trying to point me towards something. As I traced the line of his pointer finger, I soon realized what he was trying to show me.

"Do you see the camera?" he asked.

"Y-yes, I noticed."

There was a camera hanging on the ceiling, perfectly hidden from our vision. It was right above Ayanokouji-kun's seat, perfectly blending with it's surroundings. If he hadn't specifically pointed that out to me, I wonder if I would ever notice something like that.

"Then, do you know what this means?"

This time he gestured towards the other arm, the arm that the compass was sticking out of.

The one that.

I..

Stabbed...

"N-no... T-this can't..." he raised his eyebrows.

"Oh? So it seems like you're finally caught up." he calmly said.

He released his grip.

I quickly pulled my arm away from his. When I looked at my palm, it was painted in crimson, covered with his fresh, deoxidized blood. His blood had already clogged on my hand, sticking out like glue.

Then I looked back at his. The compass was still sticking out of his palm like a halfly done nail on a wall. Just looking at that made me want to vomit.

However...

"Horikita Suzune, I will report you to the school authorities for violence, assault and bullying. I have sufficient proof and several witnesses up my alley. Your expulsion is now written in stone. I hope you're prepared for that."

"H-huh?"

Wait, hold on.

Am I dreaming?

No, this can't be a dream. A dream is supposed to be a heartwarming, peaceful, place. If this was a dream, then...

...why was it full of despair?

A nightmare. Yes, that's the correct terminology. This has to be a nightmare. There's no way that this could be real. If this os just a nightmare, then all have to do is just wake up. Everything should return back to normal if I did that, right?

I will go back to being myself. Everyone will go back to being themselves. Aozaki-kun and Ayanokouji-Kun will return to being as goofy as they always were.

That's how it works, right?

Then...

Wake up.

Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. Wake up.

Why can't I wake up?!

WAKE UP, SUZUNE!

"No..."

My legs went numb. I collapsed on the floor.

That wasn't a dream.

That wasn't a nightmare.

That was the cold reality.

I was going to get expelled.

Am I really going to get expelled?

NO! It can't be!

I can't get expelled!

I don't want to get expelled!

This doesn't feel real!

Yes! He must be bluffing!

This is probably just one of his stupid jokes!

"T-there's no way y-you'd actually do that, right?" I asked.

He didn't respond.

"You're not serious about this, are you?"

He didn't respond.

"Say something!"

He didn't respond.

He only remained silent, while staring at me like I was a pebble lying on the sidewalk. After observing me for a while, he then turned around and kept walking towards the door without saying a word.

"W-wait!"

He continued walking.

"STOP!" I screamed.

He didn't stop, unfazed by my words. If he went through that door, everything I worked for, everything that I wanted to accomplish, will shatter in front of me.

"Please, I beg of you. Stop." I pleaded in desperation.

He stopped in front of the door.

He stopped. He stopped!

"Levent-kun, don't report this. Please, I'm sorry."

He then turned around and again looked at me with those lifeless eyes.

"After I'm done with the medical treatment, I'll be visiting the student council office to file a report. I'll be sure to notify you when I'm done with the procedure. Well then, I'll see you later, I guess." he said.

Then he left.

.....

Student... Council...

My brother...

If I get expelled how can I ever...

Nii-san...

"St..o..op..."

No one was near me, not a single soul. I was isolated, all alone inside that unbelievably large classroom.

Just like I always wanted.

Tears rolled down my cheeks and it continued without stopping.

__________________________________________________________________

When I got out of the classroom, I pulled out my phone with my remaining unharmed hand.

On an incognito tab, I entered the "secretchat" website url and logged in with my credentials. "secretchat" was an anonymous messaging service that had somehow managed to crawl through the restrictions of our school's network. On top of that, we were using a web proxy specialized in shadowing our IP addresses with randomly assigned ones.

Basically to put it in the layman's terms, we had successfully established a secured and encrypted messaging system.

Typing with one hand wasn't a feat I particularly enjoyed, however it wasn't that big of a deal.

[Are you done with Hirata?]

I sent him a message.

A few seconds later he responded.

AI: [I explained everything to him, just like we discussed.]

AI: [How is it on your side?]

AI was the pseudonym of Ayanokouji.

I took a picture and sent it to him. A few seconds later he replied...

AI: [You sure had it rough.]

[Nice of you to care.]

AI: [How much does it hurt?]

[As much as I imagined.]

AI: [Are you sure you're okay?]

[I had already ingested a pill of Tylenol.]

[I don't think there would be any problem for me.]

[Currently headed towards the infirmary.]

[More importantly, let's proceed to our next step.]

AI: [Are you sure?]

[Affirmative.]

AI: [.....]

AI: [Are you really sure that you're okay?]

[Yes. I am fine.]

[Why do you ask?]

AI: [You're acting odd.]

AI: [Don't you think you're feeling anemic?]

[.....]

AI: [I'll do my best, just don't expect anything.]

I turned off my phone.

After I carefully pulled the compass out from my hand. Almost immediately, a fountain of blood sprayed out from the wound. Fortunately, I used my handkerchief to cover my wound. I tried to hide my wound from the other passerbys. The bare minimum who managed to notice it looked at me with concern on their face and asked me questions regarding my welfare. Of course, I denied most of them, until I met Ichinose.

"Oh, good morning Aoza- Oh my! Aozaki-kun!"

"Good morning, Ichinose-san."

"More importantly, what happened to you? Is that blood on your hand?"

"Nothing."

"That doesn't seem like 'nothing' to me, Aozaki-kun. Honestly, tell me what happened?"

I guess there's no way out of this.

"I tripped and fell down the stairs. My hand just happened to land on a sharp edge, that's all. It's just a scratch, there's nothing to worry about." I hid the compass on one of my pockets.

"Oh.. I.. I see." Ichinose didn't buy any of it.

"Well then, I'll.."

"In any case, you should rush to the infirmary. Here, come with me, Aozaki-kun."

"Eh?"

Ichinose immediately grabbed my arm and started dragging me towards the infirmary. She truly was ruthless when it came down to helping others.

"But Ichinose-san, I 'was' going towards the infirmary. Are you sure it's fine? Don't you have your class to attend?"

"It's only 8. There's still a ton of time. I could easily catch up to my homeroom by then, so you don't have to worry about it."

That's not it Ichinose.

"It's fine and all. But are you sure you're okay with this? People could start spreading rumors about you if we keep holding hands like this."

"Oh? Are you perhaps worried about that?"

"No, it's not that I'm worried about myself. I was just asking if you were okay with that."

"People will be people. They'll spread rumors no matter what you do. Besides, this isn't the time to think about rumors."

I was dumbfounded by that girl's reasoning. Her sweet citrus scent and pink blond hair fluttered on my hand. The girl in front of me was none other than the character Ichinose Honami, someone who would never leave anyone behind who are in need of her help.

"You're a good person, Ichinose-san."

"Eh? Um... Thank you. But... I'm really not as good as you make of me."

Ichinose tightened her grip. Apparently she felt uncomfortable when I complemented her.

"I see."

There was a hidden message behind her words, which I couldn't help but agree with. Even Ichinose had a past that she wanted to protect. A past about the time she stole earrings from an accessories shop.

"No man's truly a saint." is what I had interpreted in my mind.

Humans are not perfect. We were born with both good and evil. The only difference is the matter of fact that some of them end up on the former majority, while the others turn out to be on the latter majority. But even so, there's no absolute good or evil, and there's definitely no in-betweens. Humans are a combination of both good and evil.

Sometimes, even the pious church leaders are caught doing inhumane deeds, while sometimes even the cruelest gang leaders are seen feeding stray animals.

"To contradict is what makes us human". This statement stands corrected for every single character in this novel. And by no means, not even Ichinose was an exception.

But then again...

"You did something not everyone would be willing to do. That is something you should be proud of, Ichinose-san."

"Heh.. I'm just doing what I should be. There's nothing to be proud of that."

"That's not true. I'm speaking from experience."

The students I had passed earlier, even after noticing my condition none of them came to my aid like Ichinose. Some of them came as far as to ask if I was okay but, that was the limit of their kindness. And I'm sure even if someone did come, they would probably do it against their will.

"No, no. I'm sure even if I didn't, someone else would've come to your help. We're all in this together, aren't we?"

Sigh.

"I suppose I can't persuade you to think like that, huh?"

"Hehe~ Glad that you understand, Aozaki-kun."

That name again.

"Ichinose-san, I'm sorry if I sound rude but, I don't feel comfortable when someone calls me by that name. Could you please call me Levent. I grew up being called by that name. I know this is an odd request, but I would appreciate it."

"No, no. It's fine, you don't have to apologize. I should be the one to apologize for making you uncomfortable."

I felt like a scum of the world for asking such an uncomfortable favor from someone who was genuinely trying to help me.

But I just... couldn't stand hearing that woman's name.

Because of that, the air had become awkward between us. I tried to change topics.

"Ichinose-san, tell me about your classmates."

"Well, I think all of my classmates are very nice people. All of us are getting along well with each other. And I'm proud to say all of my classmates are my friends."

"Ehh?? All of them?"

"That's right. I cherish all of them as friends."

"I see."

.....

"I wish I had a quarter of them" I mumbled to myself.

"Did you say something, Levent-kun?"

"No, it was nothing."

We kept the conversation running until we finally reached the infirmary. After dropping me off, Ichinose said farewell and left for her class.

I called absence for the day due to my treatment.

__________________________________________________________________

It was already evening. After the effects of the medicine wore off, I woke up with bandages covering my left arm. Strangely it didn't feel weird or odd or anything like that. Instead, it felt nostalgic.

I was lying on the bed, contemplating what had happened earlier. Why did I lose composure all of a sudden? The existence of that woman ended as soon as I transmigrated. Why do I care about that name anyway?

This is troublesome. Now that I've done it, there's no way left for me but to do 'that'.

I got up from the bed and checked my phone. Ayanokouji messaged me saying...

AI: [It's done.]

I checked the clock, it was only 10 minutes prior to 5 pm. Apparently I was lucky enough to wake up right before the classes had ended.

After taking my prescription and some medicines from the nurse, I took my leave. I was headed straight towards the gymnasium. When I got out of the building, the classes had already broke and students were pouring out of their classrooms.

While I was walking, I was reminded of the fact that I had forgotten about my bag that I left in the classroom after the incident took place. A part of me wanted to go and bring it back.

But a part of me also believed that Ayanokouji would bring that back to the dormitory for me. So I continued walking towards the gymnasium without stopping.

When I entered the gym, the sports club members were getting prepared for their club activities. I managed to get through the backdoor without being noticed.

The place I had in mind was the spot that had no cameras, where Sudou was being set-up in the light novel. This time however, I was the one to set-up the trap for Horikita.

When I reached the spot, I didn't even need to look. She was there, just like she was instructed. Ayanokouji did his part, now it was my turn.

I slowly approached her, she noticed me. When I got close enough she reluctantly came towards me.

"Good afternoon, Levent-kun. Is your wound okay?"

"Did Ayanokouji message you?"

I immediately went straight to the point. My sudden forcefulness seemed to catch her off guard. The method I was using required pressurizing the target. Which is why I didn't care if I was being rude or not.

"Yes. He said you agreed to not report me to the school. Is that true?"

"That depends."

"What do mean by that?"

"It depends entirely on which direction you decide to take this conversation.

Ayanokouji merely delayed your expulsion and persuaded me to at least try to negotiate with you.

In a sense, you are still standing here because of him. If he isn't a true friend, then I don't know who is."

"Ayanokouji-kun... did that?"

"Yes. He did. You should've seen how serious he was when he was talking about friendships and bonds and whatnot." I lied through my teeth.

Basically, I was trying to make her feel indebted to Ayanokouji. That way we could both manipulate her whenever we find fit.

It was also a way for me to make a flowery "let's win through the power of friendship" type of impression on Ayanokouji.

"But honestly, I don't consider any of them when it comes to you. You're a phony after all."

I suddenly grabbed her phone from her hand and turned on the screen. Horikita's eyes widened in panic as I did that.

"Stop! Don't!"

She tried to grab it back but it was useless. I knew what she was trying to do. I was already aware of her tendencies to use underhanded methods like what she was trying to do with me. But even if she did, it wouldn't do any help to her in anyway.

"As expected. My impression of you just got worse."

"T-that's... that."

"That? You mean recording the voice if I accidentally slipped anything? Well then, be my guest."

I returned her phone. She retrieved it with shakey hands.

"I'm sorry. I didn't.."

"I initially wanted to negotiate with you but now I've changed my mind. For you, there's no hope for redemption. I will go back to my original plan to expell you. Now, you may die hugging onto those false hopes you have fabricated inside your mind."

I turned around and started walking above the stairs.

I was only a few steps above when suddenly, I felt a pull on the hem of my uniform. Of course it was all part of the plan. I never intended to actually leave. To make Horikita completely hopeless was the plan. I coldly looked back.

"....."

But to say the very least, just looking at her face completely dissolved in despair, actually made me quite surprised.

"Stop! Don't go, not again! I'm sorry! I'm really sorry! I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry! Please! I will do anything! Please stop!" she shouted while crying.

Horikita was... crying.

Horikita Suzune was crying.

The cold ice queen who barely showed any emotion towards me, was now bawling her eyes in front of me.

That...

That was...

That was something I...

...wanted to see from the very beginning.

"Anything, huh?"

I grabbed her by the shirt and pushed her against the wall. Then I looked dead in her wet and teary eyes. My wounds were probably undone due to the sudden movement, pain shrieked throughout my arm again. But now, I couldn't care less about the pain. My goal was right in front of me.

That's right, Horikita.

Break.

Break into small pieces.

Break into pieces so small that it would seem almost impossible to reintegrate them.

And after you're done breaking, I will put you back together.

That is how I, will personally form you into a perfect puppet.

Current balance: 794, 630 ¶¶

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