27 The issues of sincerity and love
A.N. I believe this next snippet of lyrics is quite relevant to this chapter. Who's perspective would it be from? Comment here.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
~There's a boy I know, he's the one I dream of~
~Looks into my eyes, takes me to the clouds above, mmm-hmm~
~Oh, I lose control, can't seem to get enough, uh-huh~
~When I wake from dreaming, tell me, is it really love?~
~Ooh, how will I know? (don't trust your feelings)~
~How will I know?~
~How will I know? (love can be deceiving)~
~How will I know?~
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Well Steve, I guess this is where we part ways...again." Finn said as Gareth nodded while holding the sleeping Loki over his shoulder.
"Yeah. It was nice, getting to share a meal again." Steve answered. "I appreciate these small moments of calm and happiness before the madness kicks in."
"I couldn't agree more." Riveria said. "The news of this all will be making rounds in the city tomorrow. Adventurers and civilians alike keep a vigilant eye on the guild's postings, and your name will be in all of their mouths."
"The good thing about it is that Finn's signature is stamped over it, so with the backing of the Loki Familia, I shouldn't be on the receiving end of all hostilities." Steve glanced over at the pissed Loki. "Even if your goddess herself doesn't seem to like me."
When Loki had finally woken up, and saw that her girls were still clinging onto Steve, the memories of that night's conversation came rushing back and she had drunk herself silly to the point of being 'politely' asked to leave. Fortunately at that point, the Loki Familia were done with their respective meals and had paid for their expenses before walking out.
"Don't worry about her, she'll get over it soon enough." Tione shrugged before narrowing her eyes at Steve. "You'd better treat my sisters well. I've stuck up for you now, so act on it. Otherwise, I don't care how strong you are, I'll kick your ass if you hurt them."
"By sisters, I assume you mean these two." Steve cocked his head at the two girls on either side of him, holding onto his arms. Ais on his right, Tiona on his left.
"Who else?" Tione smiled. "You really are a lucky bastard."
"I did say that down on the 38th floor, didn't I?" Steve chuckled. "Although, I'm wondering now if the universe aims to punish me for my arrogant statement. I now find myself under a great responsibility." He joked.
"Treat them well all the same." Gareth winked. "Or our contract is null."
"Yeah, yeah. Don't already go assuming the extremes of me." Steve rolled his eyes. "I think it's about time we all went home, don't you think?"
"Yes. Goodnight Steve. We'll talk to you again." Finn waved as he beckoned to his Familia to turn around and move on their way. One by one, each member of the Loki Familia who had come to eat bade him farewell (barring Bete who just grunted gloomily) and followed their captain.
"I guess I'll be seeing you two tomorrow then?" Steve asked the two girls.
"You bet!" Tiona grinned happily. "What do you say? Shall we meet up at the guild? Or perhaps the tower? There's plenty of stuff in Babel alone to sightsee."
"Yeah sure."
Ais pulled on his arm. "And we can train too. I know plenty of places on the city walls where we can spar." The kuudere half said, half pleaded.
"Sure, sure." Steve chuckled softly before he gave them both a soft yet serious stare. "The three of us have much to discuss. Tonight is not a good time to settle this...but it goes unsaid we have some things to straighten out. So I propose that tomorrow, we establish what's what, once and for all."
"You know, you really are a 'don't beat around the bush' guy." Tiona said. "But then that's one of the things we like about you. Of course."
"Mhm." Ais nodded sullenly, for some reason.
"Great." Steve said as he slipped his arms out of their grasps. "Then I'll be going now if you don't mind. We'll have a lot of time to spend together tomorrow, so I'll see you then."
"Bye Steve." Tiona waved at him as she closed her eyes and gave him a fully toothed smile. "Don't oversleep, okay?"
"As if." Steve waved back at them as he watched them run off and join their now departing Familia. "This is practically being forced on me at the moment. But I don't want to hurt them."
"The hell are you so afraid of?" Ptah grumbled as he propped up from where he'd been leaning and waiting on a wall. "You like both of them, and it's clear to even a blind man that they like you, perhaps even more than you like them to be honest. And they both seem okay with each other, as in both have no problems whatsoever sharing you. Why don't you just go for it?"
The little god ranted as they both began walking down West Street to reach the Main street and head South.
"You think of only the materialistic stuff and the physical pleasures Ptah." Steve said. "I come from a culture where polygamy is not often practised, but when it is, there is much expectation upon you that you do right and justice by all of them"
Steve would say he spent the bulk of his growing years in Egypt, which was predominantly Islamic in culture. Even though his mother's blood was Coptic, she was by no means religious at all and so he was very exposed to the Muslim culture and their way of life, and of course every Egyptian spoke Arabic, just as he did.
But because of how long that religion had been in Egypt, it had imprinted a set of morals on the people as a whole, not just the Muslims. And in their religion, which had bled out into societal function, it was heavily expected of a man with multiple partners that he treat them fairly and justly up to the point where if he gifted one thing to one wife, every other wife had to receive a gift too. Failure to live up to this expectation resulted in much scorn by society.
It wasn't like it was a mandate that you were to have multiple wives, but if you chose that path, then you were accountable to follow that unspoken rule, and it was imperative you did so.
Now even though Steve would traditionally be classified as an Englishman by his father's blood, your environment still shapes you. Which was why he had a problem with polygamous relationships because he could not see how a man could be exactly just between his partners; it was bound to create problems. It took a tremendous amount of discipline, honour and selflessness to accomplish that balance.
And Steve knew he was very selfish a person by nature.
One might argue that such a faith was not his religion, so why could he not abandon that culture now that he was in a new world?
People fail to realise the kind of impact your surroundings have on you, how it molds and shapes you regardless if you do not follow the majority. It is something that works on the subconscious level and no matter how much you change, your core principles still at the very least influence your decisions.
It was why Steve was worried about what lay ahead of him. It was no secret how much in favour of his feelings towards Tiona that he was leaning to. Even if he had feelings towards Ais as well, it was already a job to figure out how to work around her broken self and her haunting past. Especially when you took into cue that the events of Sword Oratoria were to happen sometime soon. Steve had only come here as he estimated a couple of months before canon.
The reason why he didn't outright reject her was because he was not man enough to do it and he knew it. Having never been with a member of the opposite sex before, he didn't know how to act in that situation. And besides, it was already proven at this point that Ais would pursue him no matter how much he pushed her away. The girl had willpower surpassed only by Bell Cranel.
Speaking of the rabbit protagonist, what was to happen now that Steve had caught the girl's attention. Would the bunny receive his cracked skill or not? And if he did, how much of the storyline had been changed?
Steve shook his head as all these thoughts ran through his head. He liked to believe he was capable of being a just man, but even with this new confidence that his avatar brought him, at heart he was still a timid introvert that was edging his way into romantics. He did not choose Tiona just because of how much he liked her character on Earth, but also because she was easily the girl who it would be least hard to work with.
The girl was an Amazon, which already set the boundaries of difficulty low. Add into the fact that Tiona coveted anyone who took an interest in her instead of overlooking her as they always did in favour of her more endowed sister, and that Tiona was his perfect opposite since she was outgoing, easy to please and just bubbly all in all. A perfect counter to his silent, deep-thoughted personality.
Most young men who had no experience with women thought only of the sexual aspects of relationships...they did not take into account the matters of the heart and the duties upon you in such a position. Steve did, and he feared that he would hurt Ais's simply because he would not approach her as readily as he did Tiona.
"Just take a leap of faith!" Ptah rolled his eyes. "Look, I know I'm hopeless when it comes to my interest. But look at it this way; those two girls professed their love for you in public. One of them actually has taken it so deep into her heart, she believes you to be some sort of hero to her. Steve, she's chosen you. What do you think would happen to her if you ignored those readily expressed feelings? I can't imagine it was easy to do either, regardless of how casual the Sword Princess is."
"But what if I fail? I haven't known these two long, which is why I'm still badly equipped to deal with this situation already. Tiona and I are both the explorative type, so we were fine with probing just to see if we would click while we're at it. But Ais is committed. What if I can't live up to that sincerity?"
Ptah grabbed his kilt. "Then at least you tried. That is the redeeming quality you can use to heal if it does not work out. The loser is the one so scared of losing, he doesn't even try."
"Where is the gender equality here Ptah? What about my fears, my feelings, my sincerity?"
"It's just the world we live in." Ptah shrugged his shoulders as he looked ahead, and his eyes became distant. "Man, spirit or god...men are always alone."
Steve shook his head and sighed. Was that not a statement he was familiar with...
"Just try." Ptah encouraged. "If it works out, then I see only double the happiness for you. If it doesn't, then it is something you can take a lesson from for future pursuits. Even if you can't stick it with both of them, that doesn't necessarily mean there has to be outright hostility between you lot. You can still be on good terms. You're stronger than you realize, and I don't just mean your powers. As your patron god, I can sense through my blessing things about you that you don't know yourself."
"...So what's the first step?"
Ptah placed hand on his child arm as they walked.
"The first step would be to talk it out with the both of them, see if they agree with the arrangement. Everything I've seen so far from them suggests they won't have a problem with it. Establish some boundaries and hope for the best. Go about it carefully, and it's only up from there."
"Thanks." Steve said sincerely as he considered his patron's words before smiling deviously. "Of course, that is granted you also follow your own advice Ptah. It would make you look quite the hypocrite if you're giving me love and dating advice when for hundreds of millions of years, you've abstained from just confessing to your massive crush..."
"I'm working on it." Ptah grumbled. "I just need some more time."
"What are you waiting for?"
"...You."
...
There was something in the way Ptah said that word that made Steve freeze in place as Ptah stared at him.
"What do you mean?" The gamer asked him.
"You might be able to pull the wool over the eyes of all the other mortals and gods." Ptah said. "But I'm a Primordial, Steve. I'm not stupid. You are an anomaly given to this world. The gods would actively make sure something like you would not even begin to exist. That suggests you are something out of our control and there is nothing in this world outside of our control."
The both stared at each other for a good few moments before Steve frowned.
"Do you mean to move against me?"
"...I've said to Ouranos that you are free to do as you please." Ptah said as he began walking again, prompting Steve to follow. "We descended to the mortal realms to find entertainment and new things to explore. I'd imagine you'd bring so much more of that than what we can find in the Dungeon. I don't believe you have bad intentions, and I am eager to see the results of whatever machinations are boiling around inside that head of yours...just don't expect Ouranos to feel the same."
"So just to be clear, you're aware of what I am?"
"I don't know what you are...I just know you aren't one of us. But I don't have much problem with that. Judging by all that I saw when I updated your status, I have seen the extent of your abilities and I care little for whatever you were before. Just expect that any evil intentions will be met by absolute resistance by the others." Ptah paused for a moment. "I don't demand you tell me anything about where you came from nor how you got here. Because to be frank, I'm too tired and lazy to even care. I will say thought that if you garner Ouranos's favour, then you can be free to do whatever you want pretty much."
"...This isn't really the kind of direction I thought things would take."
"You know I'm too lazy to do anything akin to the norm." Ptah folded his arms above his head. "Just don't disturb my lazing and don't touch my statues and we have no problems."
"Huh." Steve said. "So...hypothetically speaking...if I were to open a doorway to a new realm, how would that sit with the other gods?"
Ptah put a finger to his chin.
"Like I said, we love anything new. Of course there are those who would be wary and would want to enforce some moderation on you. But just get Ouranos on your side, and those objections will be quelled I'd imagine." Ptah gave him a side-eye. "Can you do those things?"
"...I can..."
"Hm." Ptah hummed. "Well, I guess if the benefits of those decisions outweigh the dangers, the other gods won't have much problem. I assume you intend to make profit from this?"
"Naturally."
"Then I'd say that alone would set a few worries at ease." Ptah grinned. "You'd be surprised how adaptive we are. And the mortals will only ever do as they are bidden. As long as there is entertainment to be had, the majority of us won't care. Of course, I'd advise that you get past the hurdle of your level reveal tomorrow before you plan any inter-dimensional hits."
"Duly noted." Steve as his brain went into overdrive. All the plans he had made now had a 50% increase of chance in being implemented.
"Moving onto happier things, what's to eat when we get home?" Ptah said.
"You really are a bloody glutton. We literally just came from a pub!"
"So what? Second dinners are important too!"
"Oh for god's sake you greedy little..."
Just as Ptah was about to voice a retort as he usually did, both of them heard a pair of footsteps running around the corner. They were light, indicating somebody small but fast with how frequent those footsteps were.
"Oh I hate going home late at night!" A female voice said panickily. "The night is full of creeps!"
As if it were an exact reflection of what happened to Steve earlier that day, somebody rounded the corner and slammed right into Ptah, someone who was of equal size to him.
""OOFFF!"" They both shouted simultaneously as their foreheads clipped against each other and they both landed on their butts.
The girl dropped a paper bag that was in her arms, and it burst open when it hit the ground, sending what looked like fried potato croquettes rolling out as the girl rubbed her face. Both 'children' rubbed their foreheads while groaning in pain before they looked up with the indignation of children, in perfect synchronisation Steve noted.
""What's the big idea?!"" Both Ptah and the girl shouted at each other before they both did a double-take as they recognised each other.
Meanwhile, Steve just stood by as he recognised their new friend...and all he could do was whistle at what he saw.
'Damn, they are big.'
---
As the Loki Familia piled into their home, the Twilight Manor, intent on putting their tired bodies and tired minds to bed, Tiona seized the chance to grab Ais by the hand and pull her to a separate room away from prying eyes and drooping ears.
"What is it Tiona?" Ais asked confused as her friend pushed her to sit down on a stool, while the Amazon pulled out another for herself. Tiona sat down on the stool, her elbows resting on her knees with her chin on the back of her hands as she adopted a serious expression.
"We need to have a talk Ais." Tiona said. "And I think you know about what..."
Even though Ais made no outward reaction to this, Tiona knew her well enough to see Ais shift nervously inside.
"Steve." Ais said, as blunt as ever.
"Yes. It goes unsaid how we are both gunning for the same man." Tiona stated, as a simple fact. "That much is pretty obvious with at least an eye or an ear. But I want to know the reason why."
"Reason?" Ais cocked her head. "You mean why I like him?"
"Precisely."
"He's my hero."
Tiona sighed as she shook her head while burying her face in her palm. "That's the thing Ais. What exactly does that mean? What about him makes him your hero?"
"He's str-"
"I KNOW he's strong Ais. Everyone who's met him knows he's strong. But don't tell me his strength is all that makes him attractive to you. If that were your only standard, you'd probably be clutching Ottar right about now with how strong he is."
Ais looked taken aback at Tiona's statement. Naturally, hearing such a thing made the Sword Princess envision such a scene. Tiona lifted an amused brow as she saw Ais frown a little while her eyes widened, showing blatant opposition to such a hypothetical.
"You see?" Tiona said. "Before Steve came along, Ottar was the undisputed strongest and you've met him several times over at this point. Why don't you like him the same way? It just goes to show that it's not just strength that qualifies Steve as your 'Hero'...soooo, what else do you like about Steve?"
Ais thought for a moment, contemplating this question. Slowly, she began to realize that it was not as easy as just blurting out about his power. Didn't mean that she didn't have a few things to say though.
"He's kind, and he's generous. And he's brave too."
"That 'kindness' you see Ais is nothing but common courtesy. We live in a city of hardened adventurers, and let's be honest. Most of the men in this city are nothing but perverted horndogs. It's not often you come across a gentleman like Steve, which is why he seems kind to you. He's just being respectful. And as for generous and brave, those gifts were given to us on a transactional basis. He wanted something in return for what he gave us, and I doubt anybody would not be 'brave' after becoming as strong as he is. So again, not really legitimate reason to proclaim him your Hero and insist that he is your chosen other." Tiona finished, making the blonde girl think really hard about her situation.
The trouble was, everything Tiona said appeared to become more and more true the longer this went on. Ais got distracted by a little detail though.
"When did you sound so smart?" Ais tilted her head questioningly.
From anyone else, Tiona may have taken that as an insult but Ais did not have the mindset nor really the wit to formulate something like that on those kind of intentions. Whatever Ais said would be genuine curiosities.
"I always am smart." Tiona folded her arms and looked away in a mock-pout. "I'm just extra smart wherever my future mate is concerned."
Ais frowned hearing that, which caught Tiona's attention.
"What about me saying that displeased you Ais?" Tiona smirked as she leaned closer into her friend's face. "You wouldn't be jealous, would you?"
"...I don't know." Ais looked down. "It's just...he's always focused on you but...he seems afraid of me."
"The answer to that is simple." Tiona lifted a finger. "You're approaching him the wrong way."
"How?"
"Take a look at me. I respond with equal, if not more enthusiasm to his approaches, and I conduct it in the same way. You on the other hand, though you proclaim your feelings in your own special way, only approach him under the objective of perhaps sparring him or warding off other women apart from me who look like they have an interest in him. Now considering who you are, he probably just assumes that's your way of showing your feelings." Tiona fixed her with a stare. "But you're coming onto him too strong."
"Too strong?"
"Yes. Listen, we haven't known him long. He is currently testing the waters, seeing if he could find something to be had with me and perhaps even with you. But you come on to him like you're already committed, not as girlfriend but a full blown wife! Even he would be intimidated by that. And it's not like he has much to read from you to decipher your intentions or to work with you."
"What?"
"Look Ais." Tiona sighed. "Let's put it straight, you're not good at feelings. Your not good at showing them, and you're not good with men. There are some rumours going around even that you hate men in general and that your interests don't lie in them."
"What does that mean?"
"Don't worry about it. The point is, although I believe you have genuine interest in him which is something I genuinely celebrate, you can't figure out what those interests are and he can see it clear as day. If you can't be transparent and yet you're going at it so strong, of course he's going to be reluctant in committing anything to you."
"So why do you like him then?"
"Well I make it obvious." Tiona smiled as she right away had her answers. "I too love his strength. I am an Amazon after all, and although I'm not as infatuated with finding mates as other Amazons are, I still have the same standard. A part of me chases him for his power because I want children who will inherit that power and hopefully from me too. It's just a thing of nature with us.
But other than that, I like the fact he finds me attractive. No men have really done that because they are just so petty. He's the first to like me as I am.
Third, he is honest and upfront. Sure he has his secrets and he doesn't like sharing his past but don't we all? Look how long I've known you, but I don't know anything about your past nor do you know much about mine. We have our dark moments but what matters is what we do now.
He also understands boundaries and makes sure to establish them first. He knows his limits and he's conscious of women, which is a lot more than can be said for men in our own Familia. He doesn't step over the line, and he has enough self-respect to make sure that no one else steps over it either. He respects himself and upholds himself with dignity. That is a man who is strong not just in body but character as well." Tiona smiled wider. "That's just a few things though. And of course, he's really good looking. He has the perfect build and the nicest hair I've seen on a boy. And he's clean too I suppose."
"...You really do like him." Ais said.
"And so do you. And he likes both of us. And therein lies the problem."
"What is the problem?"
"As boisterous and outgoing as he is, it's clear he's never been in a relationship before. So he handles women's hearts like they're glass ornaments. He's afraid that accepting one of us will probably cause the other's heart to break. It's just boys...the good ones at least. He'd rather keep quiet about his feelings than hurt any one of us."
Ais stayed quiet for a while as she considered this. Amazons took intimate relationships as seriously as they took fighting, so it made sense that Tiona had such an in-depth viewpoint on the matter. Everything the other girl was saying clicked into place around Steve.
"So what do we do?"
"Aaaah, now here is one of those moments, where we women have the power." Tiona leaned forward and smiled. "If he is unable to make the next step...well, then the two of us are going to have to make him, by giving him no option but to act."
"How?"
"Well first, WE are going to have to come to an agreement." Tiona leaned her head into her palms. "What do you think about sharing him?"
"...That's..." Ais began before stopping and looking confused. "Is that normal?"
"You don't even know that." Tiona sighed. "It's pretty common for powerful men to have several partners. Some of our greatest heroes and kings have had multiple partners. In this world, it's for the purpose of passing on strong blood, which is why we Amazons value it so highly."
"Still..." Ais said hesitantly. "...it doesn't seem fair."
"Well I want him just as much as you do Ais. Just that I prioritise certain things from him more. And I'm not going to fight over him. And besides..." Tiona leaned forward with a suddenly very serious look and air around her. "...do you know how to...".
The rest of that sentence was whispered into Ais's ear and the girl flushed a little before shaking her head.
"I thought as much." Tiona sighed. "If you don't even know things like that, then you'll get nowhere. Look Ais, the last thing I want is to be in competition with you, and it's clear that us being competitive upsets him. Think about it, everyone stays happy and I get to teach you all the important stuff along the way."
"It's not that I disagree." Ais said. "But wouldn't you say that it's something he'd disagree with too?"
"Ais, EVERY man finds the idea of more than one partner enticing deep down. If he says he doesn't, I guarantee you he's lying. Besides, I'm not saying that we just let every other bimbo come and join us. I say we keep him for ourselves. We're the only two he's shown an interest in after all. And any other hoe that comes near...well we're both first class adventurers. I'm sure we can chase them away easy enough. And consider this, there is going to be a lot of attention on him when his details are publicized. As well as those who will mean him harm, there are those who will seek to get close to him. What if he finds someone else that will capture his heart and whisk him away from you and me?"
Ais looked at her in genuine alarm, suddenly finding that idea very disagreeable.
"So what would you rather it be?" Tiona put out one hand. "We both have him knowing that the two of us aren't going to try and sabotage one another, and we keep each other happy. You get to know him at a proper pace while I go on ahead and take the brunt of his advances and teach you what I know until you're physically and mentally ready." Tiona put out the other. "Or someone else takes him away and not only do I lose the only man who has ever taken a sincere interest in me, but you lose your hero too."
Ais looked between the two hands, pondering the two options. Ais knew that if she competed with Tiona, she'd lose in this battle. Steve was already shown to have a preference because Tiona was easier to deal with. And with the inevitable drama that was soon to follow, there would be a whole lot more people going after Steve since everyone would either want him on their side or they would seek to eliminate him.
Already she'd seen signs of other women trying to claim him. There was something about that waitress in the Hostess that didn't sit right with her...this was nothing like what her mother had taught her...but then again, Tiona was right. Many heroes in the past had multiple partners now she thought about it. And Ais was certain that their new ally was her Hero.
"Okay." Ais nodded finally in agreement.
"Great!" Tiona said as she grasped Ais's hands. "Already everyone approves, so this is just perfect. Now we just need to get him involved."
"But how?"
"Well, here's what we'll do..."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Comment and Review!
Discord: discord.gg/5zym8SdT
Read ahead on my Patreon:
Patreon/ Vulkizaro_Zoromi
For commissions:
Ko-Fi/ vulkizarozoromi
