1 Long talk, with some sake

Waking up from his sleep, Koujiro found himself laying on top of sand instead of inside his apartment.

"Urgh, where the fuck I am?"

Koujiro grunted while shielding his eyes from the bright sun, he felt the sand with his other hand and immediately realized that he's not anywhere near his apartment.

"Did the goons prank me again after I passed out?"

He looked around to find out where he was, but all he saw was an endless sea in front of him, a beach as far as his eyes can see and a thick jungle behind him.

Before he's able to stand up and explore the place, a blue screen popped out in front of him with a mail sign in the middle of it.

"What the fuck? Am I still dreaming?"

He thought while looking around and slapped his face to make sure.

"Not in a dream for sure, but what fuck is this? Is this the new smart glasses that those kids keep talking about? But I'm not wearing any glasses though."

He poked the blue screen to try to figure things out, but his finger just went through it. He tapped the mail sign, and the mail opened showing a pretty long letter.

"Hello there Arima-kun, I took the liberty of ..... if you want to ask me some questions tap here to summon me."

He skimmed most of the letter because it's too long and immediately tapped the small icon on the bottom of the letter to summon the person who sent him the message.

"Well, that was fast."

Koujiro heard someone talking behind him and immediately turned around to face the person.

"Woah, who the fuck are you old man? You almost gave me a heart attack there."

"Who are you calling old man ha? You're also an old man yourself"

The unknown old man said while pointing at Koujiro and scoffed, both annoyed at being called old.

"First of all, look at your white hair and beard, also those wrinkles, definitely an old man, look at yourself. Meanwhile, me, look at these muscles, shining black hair, and zero wrinkles. If a woman would see me she would think I'm in my early thirties, ha!!!"

Koujiro flexed his muscles and combed his 'natural' shining black hair with his finger. Before the old man replied, Koujiro continued…

"And also you old bastard, the only one who can call me Arima-kun is oyajii, the last man who tried got both his legs broken."

Koujiro threatened the old man while trying to tackle him to break his legs.

"Calm down kid, I thought you summoned me to ask some questions not to fight. Also, you have zero chance of winning a fight with me, you're too green."

The old man just waved his hand and Koujiro flew hundreds of meters to the sea.

"WHAT THE FUCK OLD MAN !!! THAT'S HURT."

Koujiro shouted after stabilizing himself while swimming back to the beach.

After a few minutes of swimming, he reached the beach and laid down on his back breathing his lungs out because he rarely does heavy work out and just lifts some weight daily to keep in shape.

"Well, you're the one who started it. Now if you have questions, ask away. I don't have much time for child fights."

"The only one I got right now is, where the fuck is this? and what is that? Was that magic or some shit?" 

Koujiro said while trying to stand up, still out of breath from the swim earlier.

"Well, you should read the letter thoroughly."

The old man replied nonchalantly while summoning two chairs for them to sit confirming the question about magic.

"Too long old man, I had enough of that at my office, you should make it short and simple. Now explain what the fuck is going on."

Koujiro took a seat and spread his leg using his usual intimidating Yakuza style, even though it didn't work.

"Well, the one who wrote the letter is not me, don't blame me for that, and the short version is, you're dead, and I'm giving you a second chance to live the life that you always wanted."

"How the fuck am I dead if I'm breathing and talking right now? Is this hell? Does not look like one to me."

"You only heard the part that you're dead did you? What the fuck is wrong with you? I can tell clearly you're not deaf, what's this? Short attention span problem? Man, you're dumb."

The old man laughed his lung out realizing that the one he chooses to become his spare time entertainment was dumb. 

'This is going to be fun,' he decided to help him a little bit.

Koujiro just sat there awkwardly because he's been figured out, back when people on the Yakuza said that to him he just pummeled them down and show them who is dumb, but he can't do that to this old man who clearly can just beat him with a flick of his hand.

"What's this? Cat got your tongue? Realized that you can't beat me up like the other people who called you dumb? Not so tough now are you?"

The old man chuckled after tired laughing his lungs out.

"You don't have to rub salt on the wound okay, I know I'm dumb, the only thing I can do is beat people up. Can we get back to explaining stuff?"

"Alright, so like I said, you're dead then I 'gave' you a second chance to live out your life that you always wanted. You know what I'm getting at here?"

"What do you mean give me a second chance? Are you a god or something?"

"Well, you're right and wrong at the same time, you can call me god or old man or anything you want, but what I truly am is not a thing you can comprehend 'yet', one thing I'm going to tell you is, I am the one who created everything that exists."

"Woah fuck!!! I was not a religious person back when I was alive, am I going to hell right now? Never thought that really existed though."

Koujiro tensed up, worried about his fate.

"Man you're dumb, I told you I'm giving you a second chance, but if you want to go to hell that much I can create one for you."

The old man slapped Koujiro's head, annoyed by his stupidity.

"Ouch...what the hell man, what do you mean create a hell? Don't those things heaven and hell always exist? That's what I heard from the religious people though, not that I cared."

Koujiro said while rubbing a bump on his head while confused about what the old man was saying.

"Man, this will take a while."

The old man felt a little bit regret choosing this dumb ass.

"Let me make it simple for you, I created things that 'exist', everything that you saw back on earth. All those things that humans said exist without concrete proof don't exist. Well, except me."

The old man paused to let it sink in, then took a sip of tea that appeared out of nowhere.

"Have a drink, I know you need time to process things out."

A sake bottle appeared on the table between them with a small cup with it.

After a few minutes of thinking and a half bottle of sake later Koujiro kind of got what the old man said and asked another question.

"So, if heaven and hell do not exist, what is the purpose of our creation then?"

Koujiro asked with a wise kind of attitude, even though it doesn't suit him at all and the wise attitude just lasted a second after he asked the question.

"That's deep coming from you hehe, well, I create stuff, doesn't mean I create humans and the whole universe the way it is right now, they evolve, everything is changing and evolving as we speak right now. I thought you humans have kind of figured out things a bit with your sciences."

The old man chuckled at the one-second wisdom that appeared out of Koujiro that seems like a one in a thousand years occurrence.

"Well, as you said, I'm dumb, I don't understand those science thingies, I just live the way I want and doesn't bother with complicated stuff."

Koujiro shrugged and played it cool like always.

"That's the keyword, science, specifically the brain, human thinking. Billions of years of evolution on earth, only one species made it to the top by using their brain, again back to the topic of humans saying stuff that this and that exist without concrete proof with the exception of me. Some humans use their heads to think rationally, they thought something existed then they look for concrete proof first of said existence before they tell it to other people, on the other hand, some humans think something exists out of their dependency on needing a figure to lead them, a perfect leader to worship, hence appeared the word 'gods'. They made rules about almost everything to rule their life, not that I'm saying it's a bad thing. People that don't believe in gods also create their own rules, they do so to feel safe and have something like a purpose to live. As for me myself, I don't care about the good and bad that you humans keep enforcing, I just create stuff, watch them grow, evolve, and maybe find something interesting like your species human."

The old man listed out his opinion on humans' way of doing things.

"Wow, that's a lot to take in, can I have another bottle or two of this? It tastes great, what kind of sake is this? Never drink one like this."

Koujiro was dumbfounded by the old man's explanation about the whole scene of things while showing his almost empty bottle of sake.

"Not bad, you can drink, it's a super-strong liquor I got from some other planet I forgot its name, that got me thinking, how the fuck you're passed out last time if you can handle a bottle of this just fine?"

The old man replied while summoning a crate full of the special sake.

"Hehe, I was drinking 'a lot' and some drugs too, it's my 40th birthday after all."

Koujiro scratched the back of his head embarrassed by what he did.

"Dumb ass brat."

The old man said, slapping Koujiro's head again.

Few minutes and another bottle of sake later.

"Hehehe, I'm imagining all those religious peeps face back on earth if they hear these things you just said, that would be hilarious."

Koujiro chuckled while downing the last cup of sake from his second bottle and almost choked from his laugh.

"Well, continue old man, I understand the gist of what you were saying earlier, what's the catch of this 'second chance'? There's no free food that's for sure, shoot your condition."

Koujiro returned to his Yakuza mood asking the old man.

"As I said, live your life the way you always wanted, I don't mind any killing, just do it moderately, also keep the mating stuff on the low side, I don't like watching the mating act, especially humans…"

"Heh, I don't know you are a virgin that got annoyed by people having sex."

Koujiro snickered, finding out the old man's secret.

"Shut up brat!!! Don't cut in while I'm talking, and also I don't need to mate, I don't have the need of human's desire."

The old man slapped Koujiro again on the head, making the third bump.

"As I said earlier, keep the killing on the low side, they also have rules and stuff in this world, it wouldn't be fun if you got killed early."

"Woah...Woah, hold it right there, what do you mean in this world, are we not on earth right now? It's not heaven or hell, I'm sure it's not your place either."

"That's why you should read the whole letter you dumb ass."

*WHACK* Another bump appeared on Koujiro's head.

"It's a new universe that I created, well not created more like copied, it's a huge one, much bigger than the universe you came from, I just put hundreds of universes into one to make it easier to watch and manage."

"What do you mean copied? I thought you are the creator, are there other creators just like you out there?"

"I am the one brat, I copied from the humans, some humans got creative minds and created their own universe even though it is just in the medium of writing, pretty creative nonetheless."

"Understand what I'm getting at here?"

"Hai...hai chatty old man, hehe."

*WHACK*

"Shut up brat, you're behaving like a child, not liking it one bit."

The old man was still raising his hand preparing another slap to the head.

"Understand, oyajii."

*WHACK*

"Also not your Yakuza boss, moving on, I don't know what the planet or world called since the creator never gave it a name, but the book is called One Piece."

"Hmm, what book is called One Piece? I think I heard something about One Piece from somewhere, where does it come from?"

"Umm, Japan, same as you, it's the most popular book!!! how the fuck you don't know this? The guy's name is Oda or something."

"What the fuck old man!!! It's a manga, not a book!!! Of course, I know it, my nephews never stop talking about it when they come to visit, stupid old man."

*WHACK*

"What do I care, brat!!! It's a book if I said it's a book!!!"

"Ouch, chill old man, what's with the head slap, you're just like my jiisan."

Koujiro pouted while caressing his bumps, the old man gave him the look with a hand raised because he was acting like a child again.

"Okay...okay, damn it, old people and their scolding."

"Said a forty years old man child, moving on, the world has rules and stuff, you know it if you read the book, do what you want, just make it interesting because I'll be watching."

"What the fuck old man, my purpose just to become your entertainment? Go watch the original stuff then, there are thousands to watch from Japan alone, old man."

"Where the fun in that you dumb ass, you can't interact with the stories, but I can with this world and you, hehe."

"What do you mean you can't interact with the stories, you're the 'one', you can do whatever you want I assume."

"It's against free will you dumb ass, I designed your universe with a free will for the species, that's why when shits happen on your planet, no god or miracle happens, you solve it by yourself."

"What about my free will then?"

"You're dead."

"What the fuck?...on second thought, fair enough. Can I get some help from you then?"

"Already gave you a helper."

"What helper? I don't see anyone besides us here."

Koujiro looked around him to find the helper.

"You'll know soon enough, you want to say something before I go?"

"Can I get clothes and shoes? I'm only wearing shorts here."

Koujiro said, spreading his hand showing that he was half-naked.

"I'm not your nanny, figure out that yourself."

"Awww bummer, can I at least get some of that sake? Like a crate or two more, or maybe a lot more than two if you feel generous enough for this poor man, hehe."

10 crates of sake appeared on the beach just like that.

"Naisuuu, you're the best old man."

Koujiro crouched down to get a bottle while giving a thumbs up with one hand while the other grabbed a bottle.

"Alright then, don't get too drunk and kill yourself again, hehe."

"Wait...wait...wait old man, one last thing, can I get a pack or two of cigarettes? Hehe."

Koujiro grinned, asking the old man like a kid.

"Ask your helper, I'm heading out, I want to see your funeral and look at their expression after knowing how you died, hehe."

"Not funny old man!!!"

Koujiro shouted to the old man before he disappeared like he's never been there.

"Great, now the old man is gone, I'm gonna chug these sakes like water hehe, maybe try a crate first to test the water."

Koujiro got down and sat on the sand with a crate of sake between his legs, but before he could open his second bottle, he heard another sound again, but this time the sound was inside his head.

°I wouldn't do that if I were you.°

"Who the fuck are you? Are you the helper? Where are you?"

°Yes, I am the helper that the creator had designed for you, I exist inside you, specifically your brain°

"What the fuck, that's kinda creepy, explain everything to me, the old man said you will help me, but I don't see how a sound inside my head can help me, make it short and simple."

Koujiro said, then popped a bottle with his teeth.