Chapter 6.2

"What kind of place is this?!" Nami sobbed bitterly.

"I want home!" Usopp agreed.

"Shut up, gallery," Zoro growled, pulling one of his swords out of its sheath. -We are not alone.

"Let's hope these are people," Sanji grinned, exhaling a stream of smoke.

We all tensed up when the door to the house slowly opened, letting out someone... humanoid. I mean, old and humanoid Crocus could be human, but seriously, there was no way that thing on his head was hair. And again, considering where I was...

"This... is really a person!?" Usopp blinked in disbelief.

"Maybe a flower-man," I shrugged. "I mean, seriously, knowing about the minks, the fishmen, and the long-tip tribes, I wouldn't dismiss that possibility."

"Well, whoever he is, don't let your guard down," Zoro growled, gripping his katana tighter. -He easily defeated the squid Sea King.

"Um..." Sanji thought nervously. -Most likely, he either saved us... or he was just fishing. Which makes me wonder... what does he have in store for us?

Almost in response, Crokus suddenly raised his eyes and stared at us. We all tensed up a lot as his eyes stared at us, another thing that Od's pen just couldn't quite grasp. I think I finally understand how a simple doctor managed to get someone named D., much less one of the Pirate King's crew, to sit out long enough to get any decent treatment: he scared them half to death.

And... we waited.

We waited.

We waited.

We waited.

Until finally...

Crocus sank into the lounge chair and opened the newspaper.

"CAN YOU CAN SAY SOMETHING ALREADY??" Sanji roared indignantly.

Crokus raised an eyebrow in surprise, but before he could respond, Usopp barked... from Merry's kitchen. -H-H-HEY! Y-ARE YOU LOOKING FOR A FIGHT?! I'M WARNING YOU, WE HAVE A GUN!

"And yet our sniper is not even close to her," I noted categorically.

Crokus seemed to twitch, and then the severity of his gaze doubled. -Forget about it. If you do this... someone will die.

Without any warning, the look was repeated.

And... we waited.

We waited.

We waited.

We waited.

Until finally...

"Really?" Sanji said, breaking the silence with a high degree of bravado, although I saw beads of sweat on his forehead. -And who do you think will die?

- I.

"LISTEN, YOU..." Sanji snapped, placing one foot on Merry's railing, clearly about to lunge at Crocus.

Luckily, Zoro placed a hand on Sanji's shoulder, stopping him. And this is good; although I doubt Crocus is capable of stopping a cannonball like a nameless East Blue cook like Sanji would have no problem doing so.

"No need to get angry, okay?" The first member of our team grinned, no doubt enjoying Sanji's loss of control. -Listen, old man, we have a few questions for you: Who are you and where the hell are we?

Crokus glared at the swordsman, causing us to freeze in place.

And... we waited.

We waited.

We waited.

We waited.

Until finally...

"Young man..." he growled. -Weren't you taught that it's impolite to ask questions from others before introducing yourself?

Zoro swallowed hard, trying to calm his nerves, and plastered an apologetic smile on his face. -Y-yes, good idea. Sorry about it. Let me start by calling me...

"My name is Crocus," the old doctor interrupted him, and during all this time his tone did not change a single decibel. -I am the keeper of the Cape Gemini lighthouse. I'm 71 and a half years old, Gemini, my blood type is AB, and my favorite food...

"I'LL CUT HIM INTO PIECES!" Zoro became almost as enraged as Sanji, and Wado Ichimonji was half out of his sheath.

"Calm down, he just answered a question." I rolled my eyes and giggled, slapping him on the shoulder. Soundbite could barely contain his laughter.

"So you want to know where you are, huh?" Suddenly, out of the blue, Crocus asked. -A logical question, but because of your rude disposition, I am not inclined to meet you halfway. You're invading my private resort and acting like a bunch of big shots? Hm! Also, I think your current location is pretty obvious considering how hard it is to miss the front door!

Usopp turned pale in horror. -A-are you saying that we are really in the stomach of this whale??

"But I don't want to be digested!" Nami screamed pitifully.

Without warning, Crokus' gaze returned in full force, and we froze in place.

And... we waited.

We waited.

We waited.

We waited.

Until finally...

"CAN YOU CAN STOP DOING THIS??" my teammates screamed, their nerves seeming to overcome their terror.

"Damn, guys, relax, okay?" I sighed and stuck my finger in my ear. Damn, they can be so loud sometimes. -Is it really so difficult to appreciate a good joke?

- IT WAS A JOKE!?

Soundbite roared and laughed, shaking his head from side to side on my shoulder. - AMAZING!

"At least the boy and his snail have a decent sense of humor!" Crokus snorted.

- I'm eighteen, just an FYI!

- Whatever you say, brat.

At least I tried...

- Anyway... if you want to leave, I don't mind. The exit is right there." And with these words, Crokus pointed his thumb at a pair of gates cut into the horizon.

"Wait, what??" Nami squealed in shock. -What does a vent do in a whale's stomach?? And...why is he even in the sky?

"Not exactly." I shrugged. -It's serious now, Nami. I'm very surprised that you didn't realize this from the beginning. This is soooo obvious.

"Huh?" Nami blinked in confusion.

"Wait..." Usopp glanced sideways at the "sky." -I think I understand what he's getting at! Look! Clouds! O-they don't move! They are really drawn!

- There is no wind either. Indeed, Nami... - I shook my head with a sigh. -I'm surprised you didn't realize this earlier. It should have been obvious. At least for a great navigator like you.

Nami hiccupped in confusion for a moment and then looked away, huffing in annoyance and blushing. -I was just scared and didn't pay attention. It's not a big deal... SHUT UP! - This particular roar was directed at Soundbite, who was giggling madly.

"But still, clouds!" Usopp repeated, pointing to our surroundings. -Why the hell are they here?

"This is... a hobby," Crokus told us bluntly.

"Reasonable." I nodded decisively.

"Good for health!" confirmed Soundbite.

"ARE YOU ALL GOING CRAZY!?" Usopp demanded.

"We'll deal with their brand of madness later!" Zoro barked, slapping Usopp on the shoulder. -Now let's get out of here before something else happens!

- BWWWWWWWWWW!

Without any warning, Laboon's stomach literally jumped, stomach acid boiling madly.

- Like this!

Crocus sighed sadly and shook his head. -And here he is again at his old times...

I chuckled and leaned on Merry's railing. I may have had sea legs, but it was just ridiculous. I really, really hope things get better soon, otherwise I'll have to clean up Merry's own vomit!

- Sad!

I blinked when Soundbite suddenly spoke. -What you said?

- Sad! So sad! - the transponder snail wailed with a trembling voice.

"Did you just realize this now?" I asked in confusion.

Soundbite winced and shook his head furiously. -No! I haven't listened to it before! I was too scared! And now I listened! And sad! So sad! Sad-sad-sad-sad!

Crokus sighed heavily. -This snail has good hearing. Now the whale we are inside is banging its head against the Red Line in despair.

"What??" Zoro and Sanji gasped in amazement.

"I think this explains the number of scars on this guy's head..." Nami thought sadly. -And even I hear the suffering in his cries.

"WORSE!" Soundbite shook his head even harder. -Worse than you can imagine! PAIN! Grief! SUFFERING!

"And this is because of you, isn't it?" Nami furiously turned her attention to Crocus. -You're here to kill the whale from the inside!

"I highly doubt that," I quickly intervened. -Look around: we are in the very center of this guy's intestines, and, apparently, old man Crocus has been here for quite a long time. Considering what he did to that squid, I think he can do anything to that poor whale's guts with his bare hands, let alone with those harpoons. If he really wanted to hurt him, he would have done it already. No... - I looked thoughtfully at the old doctor. -This doesn't even remotely resemble your goal, does it?

Krokus didn't answer, he just raised his eyebrow, looking up at me, and there was a flash of respect in his gaze.

"We'll figure this out later!" Zoro growled as he and Sanji moved to grab the oars that were rattling across the deck amidst the chaos. -Right now, we have to try to get to the exit before we capsize!

"Easier said than done!" Sanji chuckled. -The shaking makes it almost impossible to steer!

- Well, try, damn it! Otherwise...

*Splash*!

"Hey!" Usopp squealed. -This old man just dived!

And indeed, Crocus was no longer on the island. Instead, he became a blurry figure in colorless acid, floating straight towards the gate that marked our only exit.

"Looks like he's heading for the exit too, huh?" Usopp muttered. -I think he wants to leave before that crazy whale kills him too!

"If he wanted to just up and leave like that, why would he need to make a home in this guy's stomach?" I asked.

- I... hhhm...

Before Usopp could formulate a response, Laboon let out another mournful groan before calming down, the acid tsunami subsiding, replaced by small waves.

- Well, it feels a little better. "He must be retreating for another run," I noted calmly.

- No matter what happens, I don't care! Let's get out of here quickly! - said Zoro.

And indeed, we did just that. We rowed and rowed, getting within thirty meters of the exit from Laboon's intestines...

BAM!

- WAAAAAA!

And suddenly the small door on the gate swung open, revealing a rather strange trio: a man pretending to be a prince, a princess pretending to be a mercenary assassin-bounty hunter, and a pirate who was destined to become king of the seas.

To be honest, I felt like there was some kind of joke hidden in this.

Zoro blinked as Luffy flew above us. -Hmm, damn me. Looks like you were right, Cross.

I began to nod in agreement... before slapping my hand across my face when a thought struck me. -Oh, damn it!

- A? "What happened?" Nami asked.

- I just realized! I could ask for a thousand bellies!

Nami blinked in confusion for a second... before frowning and putting her hand in her pocket. -Yes, yes, I understood everything...

I smiled cheekily as she plopped the bill into my waiting palm. -It's a pleasure to do business with you!

"Thanks for the challenge!" Soundbite chirped in a fake Indian accent.

- Hey! As grateful as I am that you got rid of the witch, could you help me here?" Zoro shouted, taking the rope and throwing it overboard. -Until our captain drowned or was digested?

A moment later there was commotion, relieved that Laboon had finally calmed down, and one familiar face and two strangers appeared aboard our ship.

"So you guys are still alive?" Luffy grinned. - Nice!

"I'm glad to see you too, Luffy!" I smiled at my captain, and then, frowning, I turned my gaze to his two "friends," interrupting their muffled conversation. -And I see you brought guests with you. I don't think any of you would want to introduce yourself, do you?

As expected, Miss Wednesday and Mr. 9 looked away in irritation.

- Hm. This is what I was afraid of. Well, in that case, I guess I should borrow these things temporarily, right?

The Frontline Agents tensed and tried to stop me as I moved their guns, which they had been clutching since we pulled them out of the acid, out of their reach. However, before any of them could object, they were frozen by the swing of a blade - most likely Wado Ichimonji's - sliding out of its sheath.

I whistled as I leaned down to examine what must have been about half my body weight in clean weapon form. -Damn... that's a good technique; I'm not an artillery specialist, but even I can tell that." I threw an accusing glance at them. -Could you tell me who or what you want to eliminate in the glorious fire of a landmine?

Before any of the agents could respond, a very loud, very familiar, very grumpy voice came from behind us.

"WHILE I'M ALIVE!" Crokus roared indignantly. -YOU WILL NEVER HURT THE LABOON!

"Huh?" Luffy blinked in confusion. -Who is it?

"This must be old Crocus," I suggested. -As far as I can tell, he lives here, in the stomach of the whale that swallowed us. Keith, whose name is probably...

I kicked the bazooka's handle just before Mr. 9 could grab it.

-...Labun.

Soundbite let out an angry growl that was equal parts Doberman and German Shepherd, causing the agents to step back in horror.

"That's enough for you!" Mr. 9 desperately began to convince. "It's just whaling!" Y-you are pirates, we can probably come to an understanding, can't we?

I raised an eyebrow and looked at the man with a completely indifferent look. -Where I come from, whale hunting is a pretty serious crime. Besides the fact that it's fucking immoral, I mean. But I'm just a liaison officer. What do you say, captain?

Luffy remained silent, looking them up and down before speaking. -You two came here to shoot this whale in the stomach, where he couldn't even defend himself?

Mr. 9 and Miss Wednesday looked at each other for a moment, then smiled and nodded vigorously.

BAM!

The crew and I recoiled in shock as Luffy's fists struck and the couple's skulls bounced off the Merry's railing.

Luffy crossed his arms and huffed. "They asked for it themselves." He nodded decisively.

"It's scary," Soundbite whispered.

"And don't forget about it..." I whispered back.

A few minutes later we were already getting out of Laboon's stomach, away from his acid, Crocus boarded the ship with us to show us the way, and Miss Wednesday and Mr. 9 were tied back to back and leaned against Merry's mast.

"Laboon is the Island Whale," Crocus explained wearily, looking gloomily at the couple of potential killers. -They are the largest species of whale in the world and are found exclusively in the West Blue. These jokers." He lifted his chin and snorted. -They live in a neighboring village. They declare that they want to kill Laboon for his meat, because he alone could feed them for several years.

Luffy gave Crocus an indifferent look. -It's just stupid. This guy can feed them for three weeks at most.

I gave Luffy a worried look. -Your answer scares me beyond measure for many reasons.

"Anyway, I'm not going to give you or anyone else a chance to test this," Crokus spat.

"Anyway, why do you care so much about this whale?" Zoro asked bluntly. He then began to grunt when he was suddenly hit on the back of the head. "Ouch! What did I do to you two!?

"Because you're an ass!" Nami growled.

"Seriously, dude, learn some tact," I firmly shook my head.

"RUDE!" Soundbite snorted.

- Should I say this to you? It's funny.

"As rude as this question may be, I believe it is fair..." Crokus lowered his head with a sigh. -I'll start from the very beginning. You see... there's a reason Laboon keeps banging his head on the Red Line and crying at Reverse Mountain. I have been the keeper of this lighthouse for some time now. One day, a friendly group of pirates came down from Reverse Mountain, and after them came down a small whale, Laboon.

- A pirate crew with a whale as a pet? Now I heard everything," Usopp whistled.

- Firstly, we only recently got to the Grand Line. And secondly? - I pointed at Soundbite. -We shouldn't be surprised by this.

Crocus grinned, looking at our snail. -Yes... Pirate crews can meet the most interesting comrades. By that time, these pirates had already been traveling with Laboon for several years. They were going to leave Laboon in the West Blue because they knew that the Grand Line was dangerous, that Laboon wouldn't survive. But... they did not take into account that Laboon accepted them into his flock, and therefore followed them here.

The lighthouse keeper smiled sadly, recalling his old memories. -Their ship was damaged during the crossing, like most large ships. They stayed here for several months while renovations were being done, and I became friends with them and with Laboon. And then, when they left, their captain asked me to take care of Laboon for a few years, at least until they returned. They said they would travel around the world and return... so Laboon and I agreed to wait here together.

"So, the reason why he keeps hitting the Red Line and crying...?" Nami asked slowly.

Crokus shook his head slowly. -Not really. You see... Laboon's friends left about fifty years ago.

Even knowing what to expect, I could barely contain my trembling.

- But nevertheless... Laboon still thinks that his team will return.

We fell into an awkward silence for a moment as Luffy looked back at the corridor we were floating down before whistling in awe. -You know, old man, it's pretty cool here! Did you build it?

"Let me guess, another hobby?" Usopp asked calmly.

Crocus grinned sarcastically. -Hobby ? Yes, probably. Medical hobby. I may not look like it, but once upon a time, a long time ago, I was a doctor. I was even a ship's doctor for several years. Ah, those were the days...

"Wow, you were the ship's doctor?!" Luffy grinned happily. -Cool! Hey, how about you join my team and become our doctor?

My eyebrows shot up as Crokus seemed to have a momentary heart attack, suddenly turning pale and tense as if he had just seen a ghost, before quickly regaining his composure. I had a hard time suppressing a grin; D's collective will was no doubt alive and well, but there was no doubt about who exactly had inherited Roger's will, that's for sure.

However, Crokus snorted and turned away dismissively. -I? As a doctor to a bunch of reckless jerks like you at my age? The very idea is ridiculous.

Before Luffy could start begging, we were forced to stop our forward movement when we reached a large gate. Without wasting a second, Crokus jumped off the ship and began to climb the stairs that led to a passage along the corridor.

"Are doctors living inside whales a common occurrence on the Grand Line?" Nami asked half-seriously.

"Ha!" Crokus burst into barking laughter. -No, not quite ordinary, but I'm far from the strangest thing you'll see. In any case, I didn't have much choice in the restructuring. Laboon got too big and my procedures stopped working externally, so I had to improvise." The old man grunted and began to spin the big wheel. -Careful, I'm opening the floodgates.

With a grinding clang, the gate swung open, allowing us to step outside in a torrent of seawater and bodily fluids I didn't want to identify.