1 Villains, Cannon-fodders, Supporting Leads, and Main Leads from a Tragedy BE

[If I had known the ending, would it have been different?]

My only regret in this life is that I didn't let go.

Instead I had held on, believing, hoping, waiting. Until it became an ever-present yearning, a lingering desire, an obsession.

You are my obsession.

An obsession that I held on even to the point of death. It was only then that I realized, the one who I had hurt the most, continuously abusing, debasing, degrading; was myself.

I hurt myself for you.

I lashed out on my being every time I believed I had done you wrong.

Every single mistake I had made, made me hate myself even more.

I didn't even love myself.

Because all my love was given to you, to the point that I had nothing left for myself.

And it is you, who is pushing me off the cliff. You, who had cut off my every path. You, who lured me on to the path of hell.

And I believed it was heaven.

I had already been sick at the point. In denial, with raging jealousy, having misguided delusions.

I showed my worst self in front of you and I know it didn't matter.

Because you never cared about me. Because in your eyes, everything I do is wrong. Every word I speak has a hidden agenda.

You eye me down as if I was going to snap at any minute.

As if, I had hidden knives on my body. Metallic cold edges becoming sharper every second.

I don't believe I am a good person. I am just, average.

I can still be good.

But because you came into my life, I had become abnormal.

And all I ever am is bad.

...

Maybe, if only I had let go fast enough, it would not...

No, there is no guarantee. I can only pray to the heavens that there is another path not taken. And that my willful yearning for a "maybe" can be fulfilled.

In the next life I hope to not meet you, and if we do, it's best to not have fate.

I do not want to be burdened for another lifetime. As I am sure you will agree. My... love is to heavy for either of us to bear.

You once told me it was the heaviest of shackles binding you down, limiting your movements, suffocating to the point you would rather die than to be..

Ha.

Let us part and never be entangled again.

Goodbye my life's obsession.

I should've let go at the beginning.