10: Breaking apart
~Laith~
A dark lonely feeling crept into my soul. My blood ran cold, and the chilliness in my heart spread to every other part of my body.
Tears poured from my bleeding eyes to the ground. The overwhelming ache seized my being, keeping my focus shifting through all the memories of the second prince.
The brush of his skin against mine or the soft whispers under the moonlight. The confectionary short memories were made discreetly in most corners of the palace.
The place we both called home that bore witness to how he made my heart flutter. Only to break me to pieces.
The sound of thunder rumbling in the sky was a distant background sound to the haunting remembrances of my past. I didn't catch a glimpse of this ending for us, I dared to crave a time when his hand will stay longer than a passing second.
A day when he would clasp my hand in his and profess to the world that I was his. When the stars align for the two of us to be together. The moon would shine down on our love. Supporting us as we go.
Now I was kneeling in the dirt with rips of a broken heart streaming down my eyes to the land. The sound of my constant infringement heart is the exclusive sound I can make out faultlessly.
The pins and circlets on my hair fell off. Letting my hair down before the rain started pouring down. Drenching me from my head to my toes. The thoughts of the second prince stuck in my head living rent-free.
Thoughts that once brought a smile to my face currently enticed more tears to my eyes. The clouds whispered of my pain as the rain poured down vigorously. As though the skies were crying with me.
My agonies took a grip on me in broad daylight. My eyes caught a glimpse of darkness in sight, the world going in loops. Replaying the once beautiful winks with Caelan that were now a bad memory.
Disparaging my foolishness and idiocy for giving my heart readily to the first individual who depicted empathy to me.
I dote on Caelan too easily and shattered harder. 'Am I not worth loving?'
Doubts rang in my mind. I crawled under the tree and hugged my body. Clinging tightly to my body to dodge yielding myself to the void reverberating around me.
Caelan ambled away without darting back to see if I'm okay. Leaving me here to drown in the pain he left in his wake. Losing sight of the point of anything in life.
'What about the plans we made?'
The unspoken promises uttered by our eyes with every second glance. The sweet nothings whispered within the walls of the palace.
The side of the second prince I saw today was new. Ambitious and heartless, someone who saw tears in my eyes and didn't even try to wipe them away.
His name was jotted down in my heart in his beautiful calligraphy. However, his heart had someone else's name, not mine. It wasn't Princess Zakishi doomed to live a lie in the palace but I, who was unreasonable enough to fall for the ruthless second prince of Liradia.
He set fire to my heart and let it burn. My heart and soul are tainted by my love for him and he couldn't incline toward me.
I gave my all to him. Yet, in a few days, he substituted me with another and obliterated me from his subconscious and existence. He has a preference for Princess Zakishi while I was like a bad vision he wishes never comes true.
Thud!
Vociferous noises resonated in the air around them. Crawled up into a ball I was bewildered by how I ended up in this place. In the dark and isolated with no one to hold me. To assure me that everything is going to be alright.
I traced the wet ground with my fingers. Holding back the screams. The sound of me weeping was unheard by the ton for years, no reason why anyone would care now.
As long as I exist to carry out my destiny and make the world better for them. They couldn't be inconvenienced by the battles I go through that don't connect to my fate.
Loneliness was a friend I had long forgotten because of the second prince. Nevertheless, I have to embrace a stronger version of it due to him. Although I am partially accountable for what was occurring to me. I let the wrong person stroll in through the doors of my heart.
No one cautioned me: the price of caring for someone was heartbreak. Not confident a warning would have dissuaded me from proceeding down this path.
Prevent me from seizing the one opportunity to feel youthful and in love. In a world where I'm predestined for a life of war and bloodshed rather than a happy ever after ending like other regular people.
The waters in my eyes rose and fell. In a moment of weakness, I desired to end it all. 'Will you miss me when I'm gone? Will you cry at my funeral?' gloaming ideas blurring my mind from sense.
I was stumbling into the cracks of the black hole in my heart. The once extraordinary, dignified, and divine Incirion, broken and stripped of dignity in the name of love.
'Will I have you in death?' I closed my eyes. Allowing my heart a temporary moment of relief as my mind drifted away. Blank and empty of all thoughts.
Sinking deeply into the void, away from the reality of my life. A place of no worry. Fears of failing the world by having a tainted soul or not being the one the second prince showers with affection.
It was incomprehensible to rewrite the stars, with all the odds against me. I vetoed to continue fighting a losing battle.
"The world is better off without a broken Incirion," feeble proclamations flowed from my mouth. Laying still, I drowned in the silence of the void.
"Incirion Laith, wake up!" Rhon's voice rang. 'Master, pl...please wake up!" his voice echoed again. I ignored his pleas, nothing and no one can persuade me to open my eyes and return to the cruel world.
To a place where the man I cared for was set to marry someone else. With the status I held, I wouldn't be stunned if the king invited me to wed them.
"Incirion Laith!" Rhon called out sounding anguished. The tone of his voice implied something was awry. I was in no standing to help him or anyone else. The world will have to find a new savior.
The Holy Incirion, Laith, is hanging his robe.
"Laith, Love," Zephirin's delicate lovely voice infiltrated the walls I put up. "Take my hand," he appealed.