A Boy and his Retainer

Ian spent quite some time with his parents, but in the end he had to retire to his room. So, reluctantly, our hero left them behind, though he did request a guard escort him, doing his utmost to look weary. Well, in fairness though, it was more a matter of having no clue where his room even was.

They arrived after just a few minutes; he thanked the guard, whom looked far to surprised at his words of gratitude. "Please, if you would, send for my retainer. Ah, she's the elf whom accompanied me home. She'll answer to 'Ellea' provided you are polite to her." He flashed the guard his most charming smile and flipped a silver coin from hand to hand before offering it to him.

As the guard left, silver in hand, Ian entered his personal sanctuary for the first time. The room itself was a nice size, larger than his room on Terra, with two doors inside. The youth removed his shoes and set about exploring with a happy air.

The first door led to a small restroom, though that didn't smell the best. Gross... The second door opened to a closet with a nice assortment of clothing, some shoes, he even had some armor and weapons in one section of it.

"Home, sweet home," he said to himself at last, taking his backpack to the bed and plopping down. The boy sprawled there, possibly even falling asleep. Well, he might have just been resting, it was possible, just believe in him!

Regardless, he was startled into sitting up at the loud knock on the door. "Enter," he called.

The guard escorted his retainer and... Dear god, was she a prisoner? She looked pretty disheveled and was glaring at the guardsman, even as he pushed her inside a bit.

"Oi, that's not necessary, you!" Ian chided, "Ellea's my dear associate and precious retainer. A slight against her is a slight against me!"

"A-ah... My apologies, Lord Ian," the guard got out, bowing rather low. "There were some questions about her character and..."

"I won't hear anything bad about her. She was carrying some of my luggage, where is it?"

"Ah... h-here, my lord," the guard said, waving another into sight.

The second guard was a woman whom looked rather displeased, as though her work had been interrupted. She glared at our hero before tossing his bag on the floor just inside the room.

"Forgive us, highness," she grated, obviously unhappy but unable or unwilling to be rude to the boy that took her new favorite toy away from her, "We were unaware of the circumstances."

"Are you alright?" he asked, intentionally looking to his companion first. At the angry nod, he continued, "No harm done then, I suppose. You're free to go, I'll call if I need anything."

Startled, the guards glanced at each other. "My lord," the woman said carefully, "It isn't safe for you to be alone with this... woman."

"Oh? What would she do to me, do you think?"

"She might kill you or... your innocence might be in danger."

The boy laughed, "We already have the kind of relationship where we've kissed, then she pushed me down and we... exchanged body fluids. Is there something more I should fear?"

The blushing elf spoke up, "HEY!"

"Did I say anything that wasn't true?" the boy asked cheerfully, feigning ignorance.

"Technically, perhaps... but the way you phrased it sounds like-"

"You, did you seduce the young Lord Ian?" the female guard interrupted, outraged.

"You've got it all wrong!" the elf wailed, on the verge of tears.

"Oh? Let me guess, it was an accident, right? You slipped, fell, landed on his-"

Ian interjected, quickly cutting the guard off, "Have a care! I love saying that... I mean," he cleared his throat, "We haven't uhm... climbed the stairs to adulthood or anything. I'm just teasing her, promise."

"Climbed the... what? Oh... OH! I-I see... I was mistaken."

The upset elf had finally found her way to Ian, practically throwing herself into his embrace. "M-my lord, it was terrible! Th-they were t-talking a-ab-bout t-taking t-turns w-with me and..." she devolved into incoherent noises about there, even as Ian comforted her.

"Sh... it's okay, everything's going to be alright now. I promise, I won't let anyone hurt you... Hey, sh... there, there..." The boy glared at the guards as though to ask 'Are you happy now?' while holding the older woman.

The guards shared a look, then, "Well m'lord seems t'me like ya might be needin just a bit o' privacy," the male said cheerfully, seeming rather nervous.

"You run along," the female guard said, crossing her arms. "I'll attend to his lordship until he sends his... retainer away."

"Oh good," the boy said, "Mother was telling me I needed more female companionship. It was so... sad. My own mother looking down on me, sighing, and acting like I'd never find a suitable wife. I wonder if she won't settle for any woman by this stage of my life..."

"W-wait... No, never mind. Michelle, enjoy guarding Lord Ian, I'd rather not be late!"

"Where are y-" she cut off, learning that her fellow guard was gone almost before he'd finished speaking. The door made a firm 'thump' as it closed.

Ian sang cheerfully, "This awkward moment..." though his voice dropped after a moment. "Actually, bring that backpack over here, please. Ah, and be careful. I don't remember what's in it, but something could be fragile."

The guardswoman, no Michelle rather, carefully retrieved the bag, bringing it over to the young man.

"Most excellent," he gushed, pulling Ellea back and to the side, hugging her tightly for just a moment... then releasing her as he sat back up. "I've got two girls all alone with me in my room and all kinds of secrets! Hey, if you tell anyone, I'm going to spread rumors with the servants about what we were doing all alone in here, just we three."

"Eh? EH!? W-what are you saying, my lord?"

"Listen, I don't like to repeat myself. Well ladies, you're in for a treat! I'm going to show you all my goodies."

"I don't like the sound of that," Michelle was saying, though the comrades ignored her. Ian pulled over and dumped out each bag.

He set aside the clothing first, even going so far as to also add the surcoat he was wearing, the leather gloves, the trench coat, and the chainmail. He stood up a second, removing his weapon belt and added that to the pile, as well as the ornamental daggers he'd retrieved.

His quarterstaff was, interestingly enough, brought in with Ellea. Well, that was only fair, as she'd been carrying it and his shield. Next he set aside his cellphone, the solar battery and the USB cable. "This'll be useful later on," he noted out lout.

While his curious onlookers looked on, he also set aside the remains of the MRE packs, the extra heaters, and about a dozen remaining meals. And then he paused at the candy... He took the candies specifically from the MRE's, leaving the chocolate bars for later.

"Alright, who wants to eat something nice?" he asked, all innocence as he opened up a butterscotch, setting that wrapper with the MRE wrappers.

"Oh! Me!" Ellea said before the guard could say a word.

"Alright so open your mouth and..." as she did, he intentionally made a point of setting the candy on her tongue, "Just suck on this for a little bit."

That moment, right then, was when the door to his room flew open. His mother was standing there looking... well, however she looked, she was obviously surprised to see her son properly dressed it seemed.

"What's going on h...ere..." she said, starting off angry and trailing off.

"Mommy! I mean, erm, Mother dear, how lovely that you came to call on me so soon. Would you like a treat, too? OH! I also got you a little gift from Deimos Hold!" He held up the quartz crystal with, one would hope, gold running through it.

Still lying on the bed was an assortment of items... That revolver, several spare cylinders, pre-measured black powder and shot, some old Terran coins, some paper money, three books (one of them seemed to be his personal journal, though) a money belt with several coins in it, and a money pouch which was more or less full of coin.

"A-ah... Thank you, my son," the lovely woman said, blushing just a bit. The boy handed the crystal to the guard, whom in turn handed it to his mom. "It's quite pretty, isn't it?"

"Indeed," the youth agreed happily. "I didn't want to say anything sooner since I didn't get dad anything, though."

"Well, I won't tell if you don't," she replied, laughing. "If you are almost done, I'd like to remind you to bathe before dinner. We'll be having guests so be sure to dress up! Do you need help? I could..." she made twitching motions toward the closet.

"I'm a grown man, I can totally take care of myself," he began, but hastily continued as her face fell, "But I'm so tired today! I really am good but... maybe this one time you can help me? Please mommy?"

Cheerfully, his mother replied, "Of course, I know you can. But I'll just make sure you get the best outfit this 'one time', because I love you."

She looked so happy... for just a moment, the youth was afraid he'd break her heart or something. "Well," he finally got out, "I love you more, so nyah!" and the impudent boy stuck his tongue out at her.

As his mother's eyes widened in fake outrage, he added, "Besides... I'm really happy that you'd consider my feelings like this so... J-just this once." It was the tone of someone who knew he'd ask for help again each and every time... a momma's boy if ever there was one.

"Just this once," she agreed once more, laughing, "But I'll pay you back for your impudence you roguish little charmer, you!" Thus saying, our Hero had his clothing picked out for him, a set of something was delivered for Ellea too, and even the guardswoman learned she'd be dressing up. Life was getting... interesting.