I Trust Him

Chen Mu did a countdown in his head as he passed by the labs and patient rooms. Nurses walked hurriedly up and down the hall with charts in their hands to attend to other patients. Out of all the times that he's spent his days visiting the labs, never had he ever realized how fast people moved. It was as if time was passing by way too quick.

When they reached Susu's room, Chen Mu stopped and stood by the door. Through the rectangular window on the door, he could see how worried everyone seemed. He halted, and his legs tried to escape a few steps backwards.

Lin Que held his shoulders and whispered, "the only thing I can do for you is push you forward. You need to tell them sooner or later. Her condition can't wait much longer."

"I know. just..give me a moment." With his hands on his hips, he lowered his head and took several deep breaths before gathering his courage to push open the door to Susu's room. Everyone inside the room could tell that it wasn't good news from the looks on his face. They patiently waited for them to tell them about Susu's condition.

Once Chen Mu had finished speaking to the crowd outside Susu's room, everyone looked gravely pale. "How could this be?" Lily mumbled several times while Ariana spat out curses at Kitty. After a few minutes, Lily, Ariana and Chen Nan went back to look after Susu. Meanwhile, Professor Luo Xia and Zi Yan spaced out in the waiting area, slowly processing what they've just heard.

Chen Mu spoke with them privately and answered every inquiry that they have about Susu's condition. After covering the basics and telling them what they should be cautious about when they visit Susu, Chen Mu stood up to return to Susu's room.

"Hold on." Zi Yan stopped him.

"Yes?" he turned around to meet her worried expression.

"She...is she in good shape to hear us out? As a mother, I never took care of her, but I really want to make up for it. I really want to tell her what happened." She didn't dare raise her head when speaking about Susu. She felt ashamed of herself and guilty for abandoning Susu like that.

He sighed, "actually, I'm glad you asked me because we still need to run some exams on her when she wakes up. I wouldn't recommend telling her anything that would make her feel emotionally conflicted for the time being. "

"But we don't even know how much time she has left! What if she doesn't even get to know that she has a mother, and grandfather before her health deteriorates?" She bit her lips roughly and peeled off a piece of dry skin from it.

"I understand your frustration and eagerness in wanting to tell her the truth, but you also need to think of how she would react after hearing it. Yes, her health is in jeopardy right now. Maybe you are rushing because you think she might not have enough time to spend it with you as a family. But at the end of the day, she's just a regular human who is trying to survive."

Zi Yan chewed on her lips as she listened to him. Professor Luo Xia placed his hands over hers to make sure she doesn't act recklessly as Chen Mu continued speaking.

"She still doesn't know about her health and as much as I wish that I could lie about it, I can't. She is a very strong woman, but that's just how she packages herself. Do you think she would cry about her deteriorating health in front of others? Or accept you immediately with an open hug? No. Everything will only crush her bit by bit on the inside."

Zi Lan scoffed after hearing up to this point, "Hah, so you mean that I should keep everything to myself and not tell her anything? You think that's what she would want? Let me tell you that if I'm dying and I am alone, I would wish to have a family to support me during those times!"

"Then let me ask you this. Why would it matter whether you take care of her as a mother or social worker or anyone at this point? Why would status matter if you only wanted to convey your love to her and take care of her? It may be very important to you, but to her, she probably only wants some peace and quiet for a while. The final decision is on you, but I don't recommend telling her anything until further notice."

He stuffed his hands in his lab coat pocket and stood up straghter than before.

"You! How could you talk to me in such a disrespectful way? I'm her mother!" She raised her voice by a tad.

"Then as her mother, act like one. You've missed most of her life and now, you're asking to jump right back in when she's facing possible death? You may not have had the choice back then to consider her feelings when she was a kid, but you definitely can do it right now. Nobody could prepare themselves for death and now you're basically putting her on another looping rollercoaster."

Chen Mu wanted to get out of this conversation and go back to check up on Susu quickly, but Zi Yan kept interrupting him.

"Who are you to say all this, huh? Could you love her more than her own mother? How come you get to choose the decisions for her and keep her to yourself like that? What if she wants this mother? This grandfather? Have you ever thought of that?" Zi Yan stacked up difficult questions to challenge Chen Mu's patience.

"I respect you and am here explaining every step of the way to you because of her. I can proudly tell you and swear on my life that out of everyone here, I am the one who cares for her the most. I am the only one who took care of her during her birthdays, holidays, education and many more occasions to list. You can say anything you want and doubt my words to any extent you wish, but you cannot judge my integrity based on your stubborn opinions."

"Sure, you are her mother, but it doesn't mean what you do is the best for her. What she needs isn't a rich heiress status or a castle filled with gold. All she ever needed and wanted was a simple family that nobody gave to her. If there is anything that I can trade in this world for her life and joy, I would do it for her. That's how much I love and care about her."

"Once again, the decision is on you whether you want to tell her about your family background. I just hope that you would consider her first and wait a little bit before telling her. How would you feel if the doctor tells you that your life is on the line and then you suddenly find out that you have a mother and grandfather? Would you really be able to process all these news at the same time?"

Chen Mu took a deep breath and walked away from her. Professor Luo Xia stood up from his chair and said, "I trust him. He's right that we shouldn't rush to explain everything to Susu. We might as well deal with those bastards first before telling her to make everything much simpler. She needs time to rest."

"I agree with you that he is trustworthy. Seems like I can't find any reason to disapprove him now, can I?" Zi Yan wrapped her arm around Professor Luo Xia and pulled him back to Susu's room.

All along, she only wanted to see if Chen Mu was as fierce and caring when it comes to Susu as everyone had described him to be. Now, she can relax and leave her in his hands while dealing with old debts.