SIXTEEN

"Hey, Dan, let me see you open the knives again!"

"Sure thing," I replied, flipping the balisong knives open and feeling the familiar warmth return.

It's been a few minutes since I woke up, and after I changed my clothes and tied my hair I figured that I'll stay in my room for a bit more.

"Nice! Oh, hey, you eyes are orange now! That means these knives integrated into you properly overnight, like me and my daggers!"

"Really? Nice!"

Flipping the knives closed and putting them back into their holders, I sat on the bed.

"Well, what now?"

"You should go walk around, explore some things, something like that. Or," Katsumi pondered with a cheeky grin, "you can duel me!"

"Duel you?"

"Yeah! The knives gave you my skills, but you can develop your own and add on to that!"

"Sounds fun, but let's do it in the night sometime. Don't want others to see you, right?"

"Yeah, you're right. So, walk around? I'll be lazing here, maybe flying around, alright?"

"Yeah, sure thing!"

"Right, fix those cracks too."

---------------------

Now, what do I do?

As per what Katsumi suggested to me, I'm now just walking around the school, now knowing where to really go.

Without Phos around, I'm bored.

"Ah! I know!"

-----------------

"Hey, Rutile."

"Morning, Danburite. Phos has gone out with Amethyst on her first patrol, that's why they're not around."

"Yeah, I'm aware of that. By the way, can I have some powder to fix these cracks?"

"Hm? What cracks?" Rutile asked as she turned around to look at me.

"Woah, were you crying?"

"Maybe, in my sleep."

"Cracks like these only form under immense sadness," Rutile commented as she analyzed the cracks, "had a nightmare?"

"Well, you can say that."

"Mmm-hmm. Powder should cover that up well." The doctor reached for the powder jar and brush.

"Now, close your eyes."

As Rutile brushed the powder on my cracks, I began to think about that dream.

What the hell happened? It should have ended before I was hit.

Is God messing with my head?

Why did Phos kiss me?

"Alright, it's done, you can open your eyes."

"I'm out of powder now," Rutile sighed as I opened my eyes. "Right, you're alone here today?"

"Yeah, somewhat."

"Go look for Sensei, that's what you can do. He wanted to give you your new sword alongside Phos, but you were napping in the rain yesterday."

"Ehehe...."

"Alright, go look for him, I'll go back to work."

"Sure thing, thanks doc!"

Waving goodbye, Rutile turned around and went back to whatever they were doing.

---------------------

"Sensei, were you looking for me yesterday?"

"I was, you were supposed to receive your weapon along with Phosphophyllite. But I forgot about it, my apologies.

"No worries, it's not an issue."

"Hmm..." Sensei replied. "Obsidian."

"Yeeees!"

"Bring us a medium-weight sword."

The black gem grabbed a sword and walked towards Sensei.

"Just as you requested!" they cheerfully replied as she held the sword out.

Grabbing it with one hand, Sensei took the sword and moved it in front of me.

With both hands, I held onto it, bracing myself for the weight.

Sensei let go.

Hey, it's not that heavy. That being said though...

"Too heavy for my liking, Sensei. Can I have a lighter one?"

Sensei turned around and looked at Obsidian, who nodded and went to take another.

I went through some three or more swords, before I narrowed my choices down to just two.

"A heavier sword is more durable, but a lighter sword is more agile. Choose wisely, Danburite."

"Hmm..." I pondered, comparing both swords.

"I'll take this lighter one, it's more suitable for me."

"Very well," was the reply as Sensei gave the heavier sword back to Obsidian, who went back to her station.

"Hey, Sensei," I decided to prod a bit, "what happened yesterday? You broke your table when Phos mentioned 'humans'..."

Silence.

"Sensei," Obsidian popped in, "what are 'humans'?"

"An ancient species of creature that lived before us," was the reply.

"Hm? That's all?"

"Yes, that is all. Danburite, you are dismissed."

"Yes, Sensei."

Sensei put his hand on my head. "Don't go looking for trouble."

"O-okay, I can do that."

---------------------

"Everyone is out, and I'm alone. I should have accepted Katsumi's sparring practice. Speaking of which..."

I put down my sword, took out my knives and looked at them.

"You think I'm worthy, but I'm just someone who's always lagging behind. You really think I'll be a good owner?"

I twirled and put the butterfly knives back in their holders. Picking up the sword, I decided to go out for a little walk.

-----------------------

Yeah, I really am lonely today.

Staring blankly on the grassland, I pondered about various things.

I'm always two steps behind, two steps slower, walking behind everyone's shadows. I'm never first, I've never been able to lead anything. A train is a remarkable, powerful vehicle but it cannot operate without its tracks. I'm basically that train with no track I can put down myself.

Nobody liked me back then. I guess that was a justified attitude towards me.

I sighed.

"I'm useless."

Something smacked hard on the back of my head, throwing me out of my thoughts and making me stumble forward.

"Hey, what was tha- oh. It's been a while, hasn't it?"

"Yes, it sure has," God replied.

A bit more silence.

"How long have you been behind me?"

"Not too long, but like they said, I'm everywhere. Well, how have you been finding this world?"

"It's perfect, much better than anything from there, of course."

"So why were you muttering about being useless before I smacked you?"

"..."

"Hmm, well?"

"... It's just that... I don't think I'm ever any use to anyone here at all."

"Let's hear your elaboration." God encouraged, listening.

"Well... I've been tagging along with the others, not exactly being pretty helpful too. I just feel so useless, like I'm just simply a sack of sand being lugged around. Even if I want to do something different, I don't know what to do."

"Ah, I've heard that a lot," God replied, turning around and walking for a bit. "People who want to do things, people who want to change the world, they all have great plans. But they don't know where to begin. And yet," he said, stopping and turning around to face me, "you already have begun."

"Huh?"

"Have you forgotten that you saved parts of Phos after her legs were hit by the Lunarians underwater?" God asked, walking back towards me.

"No, of course no- oh?" I realized

"Yeah, think about what would have happened if you weren't there at that time. What would you think would happen?"

"Phos would lose her legs completely."

"That's right. And the memories placed within them," God added on. "Furthermore, you went after her on your own accord, no?"

"Yeah, I see where you're coming from," I replied, realizing that I hadn't been exactly lazing around.

"See Nicole, or let's just use Danburite. That's a problem with you; you're always feeling inferior even when you're not. Modesty is important, but not giving yourself any credit, even well-deserved ones, is a completely different matter."

God placed his arms on me and looked into my eyes.

"Look, I know what you've been through, this is an issue caused by the bullying. That's why you're here, to heal yourself, alright?"

I nodded.

"You're important, Danburite. Do not settle for less. Now, I have a small assignment for you."1

"What is it?" I queried, intrigued.

"Stop thinking that you're inferior. When you do something good, admit it. Is that fine with you?"

"Ehh, I'll try."

"That's good enough for me," God smiled as he released his grasp on me. "See you next time!"

With a snap of his fingers he disappeared.

I stood there in silence.

"Do something good and admit it..." I pondered.

"I can do that."

----------------

What a huge waste of time.

What am I doing out here?

I kicked a small rock as I lazily trudged along the beach.

"Nobody to talk to, nobody to hang out with, all alone and doing nothing, this sucks..."

I stared at the ocean.

"Now that I think about it, I wonder how Ventrico is doing out there..."

Hopefully she's doing fine.

Nearing thunder rolling closer in the distance, I looked up and noticed dark clouds approaching.

"Ah, it's gonna rain, I'll take shelter. But where?"

Noticing the Cave of Emptiness ahead of me, I considered the option of entering it.

But will Cinnabar mind though?

Eh, rather think about it later, I thought as I briskly walked towards the cave while rain began to fall.

"Hello, Cinnabar?" I asked as I looked into the cave. On a small platform, there Cinnabar was, lying down. Is she sleeping?

"What do you want?" was the annoyed reply I got.

"Sorry, I'll just be here for a while till the rain stops. I promise I won't disturb you."

I go no reply.

Sitting down on the opposite side of the wall, I looked around. The room was covered in mercury, more or less just like the one back in the school.

Hearing the flipping of pages due to wind, I lifted my head up. Above me was the notebook Phos was supposed to use for her encyclopedia. Ah, Cinnabar had it all this while.

"You're not afraid."

"Afraid?"

"Afraid of my poison. You'd have to be chipped if you touch it, you know."

"I'm not afraid. Well, at least not as afraid as I once was. But that's a whole lifetime ago, it doesn't matter now."

"You were only born a few days ago."

Oh, drat. "Well, uh... yeah! I said it wrong, I guess."

"No you didn't," Cinnabar retorted, sitting up and looking at me. "You're hiding something."

"Eh?"

"Out with it, Danburite. You're born at a location different from all of us, you have all sorts of knowledge right off from the start, and you act weird at times. What exactly are you?"

Cinnabar had already gotten up and came closer to me, her eyes staring deep into my soul. Damn, I came here for shelter, not for an interrogation.

"Huh? I'm a gem, just like you and everyone else! Why would you think I'm something else?"

"You're the one being weird, none of us are like that!"

"That still doesn't give you the right to think I'm different!"

"You are different! Why did you say that to me back then, then?"

"Say what?"

"The part about my poison giving immortality to living things!"

"That's what people thought then! As hundreds of years passed people began to realize that mercury was poisono..."

Suddenly noticing that I've shot off too much, I faltered and slammed my mouth shut with my hand.1

That was an awkward silence as Cinnabar stared at me.

Cinnabar looked at me with intense interest.

"You're telling me everything, here and now."

--------------------------------------

"So, you're a human from another world sent here to live with us."

"Basically."

"And you've turned into a gem too."

"Yep. Please, keep it a secret for me."

"..."

Cinnabar looked away.

"I... take that as a yes?"

Silence.

"Eh, okay. Thanks, Cinn."

The red gem just folded her arms.

I stared outside, just like what she had decided to do. That's quite a downpour outside.

"Phos is lucky."

"Huh?"

"Phos is lucky to have you," Cinnabar replied, turning to look at me.

"More like the other way round..." I muttered, curling into a ball. "I've long forgotten the last time I had a friend, all of them had left me. Well," I admitted, "only one remained a friend even after she left..."

"Come on, it's okay, I know you're not at fault," she comforted as I buried my face in her chest, sobbing.

"He's the one being unreasonable, you bumped into him and he created a vendetta against you just because he couldn't get over it? And it's just our first year, what a sick piece of garbage. Tell ya what, I'll be your friend from now on, alright? Boy, look at all those cane marks! Your parents?"

"Nicole! Wait up, wait up!"

I stopped and turned around, just as she caught up to me.

"It's our streaming year and I failed 2 exams, damn! Surely not getting those pure subjects for sure! Hey, how about you?"

"Hmm, three."

"Ah, that's actually better than thought. Borderlines?"

"Yeah, but does it really matter? I'm still going to be beaten up no matter what..."

"I'm no different from you too, you know?" She sighed. "Well, maybe better, not trying to rub it into you. Come on, stop being this gloomy for once."

Seeing that I remained unchanged, she sighed again.

"Tell you what, let's walk home together, shall we?"

We walked together in silence towards the bus-stop.

"It's been a year already, eh Nicole?"

"Huh?"

"It's been about a year since we first met. Nothing's changed for the better for you, only gotten worse. Hey, promise me something?"

"Sure, but what?"

"Walk away from them, those people just aren't worth your time. After all, even when I'm not around, I'll come back to you. I promise."

"Hmm, alright..."

She smiled. "Now that's my Nicole! Come on, ice-cream?"

I smiled, feeling happy for the first time in a day. Or week. "Sure!"

"Jane has been transferred to another school, she won't be with us anymore starting from this year," the teacher replied coldly.

I was shocked. "But miss, Jane told me that she'd been placed in our class a week ago! Are you sure there isn't a mistake?"

"Well Nicole, who are you to talk to me like that? Getting disrespectful after finding out that you actually love hitting someone?"

"What? No, that wasn't even me-"

"Silence! I'll send you to the principal's office now, you go now while I'll call him."

"She moved away, you see."

I stared at the locked gate and front door of Jane's former apartment in disbelief, ignoring the "For Sale" sign placed over said gate.

The old lady next door sighed.

"I know how you feel, kiddo. But we've all got to move on, yeah? Your friend thinks highly of you, you aware of that? She's always talking about how sad you are everyday, about how she wants to finally see you truly happy. Want to honor your friend even after she's left? Live happily, do your best. I know you can, you're just clouded now."

"I tried to be happy," I muttered, "I really did. But they all won't let me. After you left, they all decided to gang up more against me, beating me after school, framing me for trouble, talking trash about me in front of the teachers and making indirect jokes about me onstage during some presentation. But I kept on for a year, knowing that you'll come back. You liar," I felt tears well up in my eyes as I looked at her lifeless face through her coffin's glass, "you left me for good!"

Thinking about all those times I rejected going over to her place simply because I was not allowed to by my parents, an immense guilt grabbed my heart.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry for not spending more time with you! I really didn't know this will happen! I'm so sorry!" I cried my heart out as I slumped over the coffin, the downpour outside strong as ever.

'Young Girl Killed By Speeding Driver', the headlines of the day's newspaper repeated endlessly in my head as I sat alone, at the same spot where we first met.

"Hey, trash. Want to be beaten up again? If not, get out of my seat!"

"Not now, Ken. I'm not in the mood for your charades today."

"Oh, getting snippy today, are we? Come on, let's do the usual today! On second thought," the bastard mused, "let's give you double for talking back to me!"

"I didn't even get the chance to say goodbye..." I muttered, feeling the cracks on my face that Rutile patched up earlier today reappear.

No reply from Cinnabar.

"Sorry for being this personal, I don't think you wanted to hear that."

"It's going to be alright."

"Huh?"

"You're here now, right? Leave your past there and move forward, that's how you heal," Cinnabar said. "That's how you can honor your friend too. Besides, you still owe me a job that's more fun, right?"

"Yeah."

"Look after Phos, that one's really fragile."

"I will."

"Rain stopped," Cinnabar pointed out, pointing at the downpour that had de-escalated into a light drizzle, the sunset beginning to show. "You can go."

"Alright, thanks for the shelter," I replied as I got up and prepared to leave.

"One more thing," Cinnabar stopped me.

"Eh?"

"The name for my poison," Cinnabar asked. "What was it?"

"Mercury," I replied.

"I see."

Cinnabar looked away.

I just stood there.

"What?"

"Ah, it's nothing. Thanks again, Cinn," I thanked again as I stepped out of the cave and headed back to the school.+

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