1 1: Death

Committing suicide has always been hunting my thoughts. There were times that I couldn't control myself and began my thoughts full of suicide.

My relationship with death were love-and-hate.

When I was 9 years old, I purposely let myself be fallen onto the 7ft swimming pool, being a 9 years old I was taller than anyone my age or a year older than me.

Unluckily for me, my father was just in time to save me and began calling the ambulance. I regained consciousness just in time and fallen asleep again.

But not before seeing my father's face, in that moment I realized that my father saved me.

Why did he saved me? Father have a habit of always throwing me into a deep pool all the time. I still remembered that time when I was 6 years old my father had thrown me into the pool even thought I didn't even want to wet myself.

Those memories still hunted me, yet my question remained unanswered.

Again I regained consciousness, but this time I found myself laying down in a bed and an unfamiliar room with an IV bag connected onto my hand.

I could hear my parents whispering but their facial expression were clear that they were having an another fight.

I didn't want to listen to their fight anymore so I called out my mother. And thankfully they stopped.

After that incident they would always accompany me to a pool or one of my sibling would.

At the age of 12, my Aunt's and mother would always said that I look ugly not smiling all the time. I ignored them, all of my family were weird they always made me confuse.

And that is how I began to wonder if I am just a tool that will echieve what they want.

I have always been like this, couldn't express what I wanted but I didn't care. I was tired, the only thing that had always keep me alive is my phone that consisted data about novels, animes, and Mangas.

There were times that I would imagine myself that I was the protagonist, but that imagination were foolish, I knew deep down that I would never become a protagonist let alone a supporting character.

After all, according to my Aunt's that I was a sinner for being a lesbian. Well technically, I asked her what would happened if I were a lesbian, to which she replied,

Being an LGBT is a sin to the God.

At that moment when she mentioned God, I resented that God with all I have. And my Aunt does she even realized what she had said. To explain, my Uncle is gay. And in other words she is saying that Uncle is a sinner without even realizing that she said it.

She better be thankful that she's my aunt or I would have already tell my Uncle about this. Our entire family supported my Uncle for being gay, yet why do they not support a lesbian.

At the age of 13, my mother told me that I was so rebellious, I didn't replied back at her because she was just stating the truth and I was too tired to say anything back at her.

At the age of 15 that was the final straw, my siblings blame something at me that caused my father to physically abused me, my mother wasn't at home at that time as she was busy making money at the her office. Even thought my father kept hitting me, I didn't reacted, after all I have nothing to react at his abusement, but I stared at my siblings that were so shameless.

Finally my father stopped hitting me as he left me alone to my room, after my father left at the house—to probably smoke again—my shameless siblings didn't even bother saying anything at me.

At that night, I couldn't take it anymore, I picked the most sharpest knife from our kitchen and stabbed myself from the heart.

For a moment I though that I was crazy and a masochist for feeling pleasure just from stabbing my heart and thought how much I wanted to do it again, but never had the chance to do so, as the darkness began to embrace my cold soul.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Reincarnation is weird. I thought that reincarnating would be erasing the memory of a certain past life and live again comfortably, to not let the last life haunt you. But it wasn't like that, this reincarnation was the same as those novels that I had read in my past life.

And in top of all that, my gender had changed, well I didn't mind as this had always been what I wanted. My new mother was nice, her soft tone voice that would always sing just for me were nice. Her kind attitude felt like my cold heart began warming, is this what those people call the emotion, 'love'?

Mother's embrace was warm, in my past life I know that my family love each other—excluded me—but they would never show it.

Its has been 5 days ever since I was born onto this world and I knew that I'm a Japanese now since it is what have been my mother saying, and I still have zero information about this world, like what year even is it?

Then my mother told me my name, and I had already found my answers.

Uchiha Shota.

This is my name in this world, but the last question is what timeline is it, I'd be damned if I'm in the same age as the protagonist.

I am fully aware that this world is very dangerous and if you'd ever let your guard down then you'd be dead before you even knew it, and on top of all that the Ōtsutsuki Clan which consist members that possess overpowered strength.

But. . . Why is my heart beating from excitement, even knowing all of the possibility dangers inside and outside of this planet.

But there was one thing I'm sure of after feeling the excitement, and that is I'm a crazy psychopath and a masochistic living being.

At the first night when I found out about my name I tried looking for my chakra in my body, but as expected it  failed.

Well of course it would fail, since according to the original story chakra is created when two more primal energies Physical enery and Spiritual energy are combined Tmthese two energies becoming more powerful will in turn make the created chakra more powerful.

And and of course there is no problem with the Spiritual energy since I am very smart on my own, but the problem is the Physical energy. In order for my Physical energy to be formed I would need to train my body.

I would get enough sleep at day in order for me to stay awake at night and medidate in order for my Spiritual energy to increase. My mother was a bit strange that she didn't seem to noticed my weird behavior even though it wasn't a bad thing for me, I couldn't help but be so worried.

At the age of 10 months old I began speaking but of course, my infant of a body doesn't seem respond to my orders.

At the age of 2, I began my physical training to increase my strength and develop the Physical energy. My mother doesn't seem to mind that I was training though she did told me to be careful.

Every day I would pray to whoever God there is to let my mother and I live a long life even though in my past life I resented God, but I just hope that. . . Kami-sama would listen to my prayers.

But again it never came true. . .

At the age of 3, I woke up in the afternoon seeing my mother suddenly knelt on the ground as she told me to come near her, and I did as I was told, I swear that both of my eyes were in pain as I knew what was about to happened but I still hoped that it wasn't what I was thinking. I saw both of her hands were placed in her eyes as she. . . Took out both of her eyes and a green light appeared as I felt like something was transplant into my eyes.

It wasn't painful translating something in my eyes, but my body collapse on the ground. After for some time later, I saw my mother on the ground, I delusionaly just thought that maybe she was just sleeping, but, I still checked her pulse.

There was no signs of pulse I checked again and again, there was no signs of pulse. At that moment I didn't scream, I just let out a silent cry as I embraced her body just like how she would always embraced me. For ten days and ten nights I spent absentmindedly embracing my mother's corpse. And at the end of those ten days an unexpected person came to my house.

It was Uchiha Fugaku. I stared at his expression and mostly at his eyes that revealed a newly awakened Mangekyo Sharingan with tears streaming down from his eyes.

After a few minutes had passed he said.

"You must be Hanako's child." I responded with a nod of I was too tired to say anything else while widening my eyes at the revelation of my mother's name. I didn't even know my own mother's name yet he does.

I didn't say anything as it would be weird if I know him even though we haven't even meet at the past.

Fugaku stared at mother's corpse for a moment as he carried her, I didn't utter a single word as I silently observed him. I observed him as he walked towards the library that my mother warned me not to enter inside, I followed him to the library as it was now pointless since she is dead, I heard a quiet 'tick', as the library to my right suddenly have opened.

What is happening?! My question remained unanswered, there were stairs that was heading towards underground. The stairs were long that I lost count of the numbers of stairs I had stepped on.

We finally arrived at somewhat an underground bunker, it was dark but the torches to the wall was enough to see anything. I saw Fugaku placing my mother in a black metal coffin that was about 6 foot underground.

"Wait! What is this?! This looked like it had already been planned just by looking at the coffin that is about underground six foot?!"

I screamed at Fugaku whose eyes seemed lost, after a few minutes of silence he finally replied,

"I do not know. But what I do know is that this place is a cemetery."

"How would you know that?"

"Your mother was like an older sister to me. Ever since Konoha was founded, every generation Clan Head of the Uchiha Clan was told to burry the descendants of Uchiha Akihiko here in this bunker."

"But why?"

Fugaku frowned, "I do not know, I was just told to the former Clan Head of this Clan to burry them here. And if I were to pass on the title Clan Head, I was told to also tell then the same as the former Clan Head did."

"Then where is the former Clan Head?"

"He died 1 year ago."

I swallowed a saliva as I payed my respects to my 5 ancestors including my mother. But there was something strange that I noticed while paying my respects. In each grave of my ancestors, their death were strange. Some died at the age of fifteen and one died at the age of twenty-five, but one thing for sure was that none of them ever lived passed at the age of thirty.

How strange.