Chapter 4

I opened the front door of our new house with my keys and ushered Dan in. He ran in, not wanting to miss his favourite TV show, Sherlock. 

He turned the TV on and flopped back on the couch. I removed my bag from my shoulder and went to the kitchen to make lunch. I thought tacos would be just fine. I grabbed the ingredients and started cooking. Dan came peeking in the kitchen, smelling the delicious smell. I rolled my eyes. Where there was food, there was Dan.

"I loveee tacos!" Guess who said that. 

"Oh, do you now?" I smirked and helped myself to one of my tacos.

Dan's mouth opened and he licked his lips while looking at the food. I rolled my eyes.

"Help yourself." I said while gesturing towards the food.

"Ooh thanks!" He exclaimed, leaping and grabbing one taco and thrusting it into his mouth. I chuckled. The sauce was all around his mouth, he looked so adorable. My heart literally sang at the sight of him. Awww.

He noticed my gaze and frowned, bringing up his hand to wipe off the sauce on his face. "Don't even say a word."

I frowned too, "I wasn't going to. What's wrong with you?" He shook his head and ran a hand through his hair.

"No, what's wrong with you? You have been tense all afternoon, looking around as if any second you were expecting somebody to attack you. And don't even try to lie about it." He added, seeing I opened my mouth to , uh, lie about it. Well, it wasn't lying, it was just keeping the full truth from him. I don't think that counts as lying.

I sighed. There was no getting away with this. I might as well delay as much as I could. "So, are your clothes washed or I will need to scold yo-" I said, before I was cut off, which, by the way, was extremely rude.

Whew. I actually sounded like a stuck up brat there. I don't, ever, want to be that.

" Stop. Don't change the subject here, Ash. C'mon now, tell your sweet little bro about what is troubling you," he said, his voice soothing.

"There are music auditions tomorrow at 2pm after school." I submitted, my head looping as the memories of the past tried to overcome the defence wall I had built up in the past few years to protect my battered old heart.

Silence.

I lifted my head. " Dan?"

More painstaking silence.

Then.

"Oh my god!!!! That's amazing. But won't you need to practice? Hmm. Forget that! I know you can handle it. It will go marvellously." He smiled, a encouraging smile.

"Whoa, whoa, who said I was going to the auditions, or even to audition itself?" My voice rose an octave which caused Dan to stop his babbling spree and look at me in surprise.

"But you are awesome at music. You excel at it. It's your passion. Follow your dreams, Ash. They will lead you to wherever you want to go."

I rolled my eyes. "First of all, stop speaking like those stupid ass crap philosophy books. I hate those because they make absolutely no sense. Now that you are calm enough, take some more deep breaths, because your idea of calm and mine differ a lot. Like, a lot."

Now, he rolled his eyes. "Oh please, sometimes I wonder whether I am the one who has all the maturity. Stop behaving like a child, Ash. "

I just glared at him, choosing to keep my mouth shut.

"Now, tell me everything."

So I told him the entirety of my whole day at school. He listened intently, without any interruptions and with his eyes on my face the entire time. When I finished, he shook his head and sighed.

"Ash, if you want to pursue your dream, you can. Life is presenting you a opportunity, don't let it go to waste. If you're doing this because of me, don't worry about it. I can take care of myself." He said, pushing up his chest a little bit. I chuckled at his attempts to look more manly.

I ruffled his hair, and smiled sadly. "It's not because of you, Dan. It's just..."

He caught my meaning and asked quietly. " It's about him, isn't it?"

"Yeah, he is. You know why I can't do this." I looked at him pleadingly, trying to make him understand.

He nodded slowly. "you can't because of that promise, right?" When I nodded, he continued. "He would've wanted you to do this. You and I both know that. It's your life, but, don't you want to make him proud?"

I looked in his eyes, and knew the answer in an instant. Of course I wanted to, it was my only chance at redemption. I knew he knew it too.

Dan nodded, " Then go do it."

I looked away, a strong resolve forming in my head. I would do this, and make him proud.