2 Probably A Bad Day To Know Me

- Before the incident -

I pick up the phone call and put it between my shoulder and ear as my hand is busy picking a can of coffee in the chiller. "What's up, Alyssa."

"Chocolate bar," she says nonchalantly.

I check my phone for a moment and put it back in my ear. "I'm not sure I understand," I push up, hoping for a hint or something of why she's calling me this early. There's only her small breath and the clanking of a keyboard from her end.

"Good, chocolate bar, please," and then she hangs up.

I pull out a can of coffee with a sigh. Okay, apparently she knows I'm in a convenience store now, can't even ask her how.

Explanation: That was Alyssa. A colleague—questionable one. But she was the only close friend I had in this world.

After grabbing everything I need to start my day and a chocolate bar, I put my items on the counter table that's reflecting my dead-fish eyes. Hm, maybe I'm still half-asleep. I swear my eyes were pretty good back when I look at them in the mirror. I believe it was five years ago?

A white hand grabs the chocolate bar.

The counter girl smiles.

I give her the same courtesy. But when I look at the reflection again... I don't look like smiling. The counter girl's smile goes wry. Haha, meet me, I'm only a novice at moving my facial's muscle you know?

"Welcome," chimes the automatic glass door. I wouldn't even bat an eye if this is normal, but there stands a man with all black shrouding his body. What attracts everyone's attention is the glimmer of a kitchen knife he's gripping. He pulls his mask down to the CCTV and lifts his knife. "E—Everyone, don't move. Don't move!"

He points and swings the knife toward each of us.

┐(´～｀)┌ Oh wow, it's a robbery. 

"S—Sir," the counter girl whispers to me tremblingly, "Wh—What should we do?"

I catch her eyes. "Can you scan this first? I don't want to be late for my class."

( ༎ຶ⌑༎ຶ ) "H—Huh?"

The man points his knife at me. "Hey! I say don't move!"

The man walks closer, revealing a dragon's tattoo on his left arm. That's enough to triple the intensity of the girl's shakiness. Knife still jabbing.

"What are you trying to do here, huh?"

"I just want to buy coffee."

"You—You think you're funny?"

No, but I know some jokes I found on the internet. "Hey."

The robber had put his bag on the counter and ordered the girl to put all the cash in and when I call him, he rocks his hand with the knife.

I dodge the unintentional attack; the assaulter didn't even realize it. "What! Do you want me to cut your throat out?"

The cashier looks at me as I give her a look 'take this opportunity.'

"Are you playing something?" The robber puts the knife on my neck.

I raise my hand, "Look, just have a question for you, okay?"

"You have guts asking question with your current situation now."

I don't actually need any gut to deal with this right now. I had been in a way worse situation before. How was it? Ah, the dark Excalibur on my throat when I was fighting with the three headed demon's lord. Or that one time I was surrounded with a thousand claws.

A kitchen knife almost puts a smile on my face. But I hold it down. I have another plan for you. "Do you mind me asking?"

"Go on."

"Like, this could be personal."

"I don't care."

"Are you for real?!"

I was trying to waste his time as much as possible, but when he jerks his knife up; I pretend to panic. "O—okay, I was only trying to ask if you're related to the dragon."

"Dragon?"

Th—this is it, the rare chance to strike. "Dr—Dragondeeznuts, haha. Holy shit, I can't believe that internet joke works—"

The knife is kissing my neck. "How dare you're playing with me? This is your final day today, retard."

Nope. I kick his knees and steps back. The robber kneels in pain and shoots up a glare at me. "You're dead meat!"

But before he can take a step closer to me, the police sirens near. The robber turns around and stares at the girl, who's obviously hiding her phone behind her body. He grunts and grabs the bag and rushes to the door.

Five minutes later, an officer came in to interrogate each of us. When it's my turn, I just say: "I got him good."

The female officer tilts her head. "What?"

"I got him with the dragon?"

"Dragon what?"

I look at her for a moment. Ah, she doesn't know.

I wave my hand dismally, "no you don't have to know that." Nah, she doesn't deserve it.

"Sir, tell me," she insists.

"Look, officer or not, there is something out there you should never ask for."

She pulls out a hand chain and looks at me seriously, "Sir, tell me about this dragon... You are not supposed to hold an information in front of an officer of law, unless you're guilty of something."

"..."

"Who is the Dragon?"

Whatever, she asks for it. "Dragon Deez Nuts."

⌒(,,๏ ⋏ ๏,,)⌒

Now I feel guilty.

She asks me to stay for five minutes longer than everybody else as a punishment. Hey, I'm the one who delays the robber with the dragon so you can come just scared off the robber. Why am I getting this harsh treatment?