7 The past we have (Edited)

Arisu Sakayanagi's POV

*Flashback

8 years ago

"Does he still lock himself in his room, Father?" I asked when I noticed my brother's absence at the dining table.

He had always been like that, locking himself in his room and avoiding us — not just us, he seemed disinterested in everyone and everything else, living in his own world. He even brought his own breakfast to his room instead of sitting here with us.

Honestly, I envied his ability to live alone like that. Life without interaction might seem boring to some, yet he didn't seem to need any of that and still managed to become the top of his school. Everyone either respected him or feared him, but no one loved him. He was the guy who lived in his own world, yet I was drawn to him because he could still live on his own terms despite being isolated by the world.

As much as I hated to admit it, I couldn't bring myself to live in such isolation; it was very dreadful and scary.

"Let him be," Father said as he continued to eat his breakfast.

We were silent for a moment, not saying a single word, focusing on our omelets.

"He chose that path himself, and it applies to you too, Arisu. You can choose any path you want. I'm just asking you to never regret the path you take or your decisions. That's all I ask."

With that, Father left, and I was lost in his words.

No wonder my brother had always been in that state. Father indulged him and didn't act like how a normal father would. If he were normal, he would have already dragged my brother from his willful state and forced him to interact with his peers. But that's how our father was; he simply didn't care what my brother became in the future, as long as he was happy with his own decisions.

I decided to approach him; I was curious about his inner world and what he was doing in that room alone.

"Brother... Are you there?" I knocked on the door of his room.

Yet, I heard no answer from him.

No matter how many times I knocked, he didn't respond or seem to care.

When I forcefully opened the door, it was locked.

Still, I was persistent, knocking on his door hard.

Probably my insistence annoyed him and ended up hurting me emotionally in the process.

What hurt me was not just his lack of response to my calls but also that he turned on music, crushing my self-esteem by doing so. It was as if he was blatantly saying that I was annoying and bothering him.

It was unacceptable to me.

I hated him for making me feel humiliated.

I swore to destroy him.

Since that day, I focused on improving myself. I learned from my father about what my brother did at school, his favorite hobbies, and what he usually did in his room. I learned all of it.

For four years, we didn't communicate or acknowledge each other's presence; we were like familiar strangers rather than family.

However, despite that cold relationship, I always observed my brother from a distance and used the spare key given by my father to sneak into his room and study him closely by opening his laptop to see what he did with it when he left for his classes.

I thought the boy would be curious about typical teenage interests like porn or girls his age, but no, my brother surprisingly spent his time writing scripts and coding that I didn't understand. Most of the content on his laptop was either unused manuscripts, coding scripts, or a bulk of games. Was this what they called 'a weeb'? Since there was no anime, I doubted that. I wasn't sure why he even bothered to develop games and write so many stories if he didn't publish any of them. Perhaps he didn't care about it? Yes, he probably thought what he wrote was just for his own amusement and could be discarded at will. By the sheer volume he wrote, I could see that my brother was very genius. Could anyone else write so many books and code so many scripts for games in such a short span of time?

"You're snooping in my business, Arisu," my brother's menacing voice brought me back from my surprise.

Instead of being embarrassed and stammering upon being discovered, I snorted back at him.

"What could you do, brother? Do you want to use violence against your own sister like you did to the classmates who bullied you?" I challenged.

He just glanced at me and slammed his laptop shut so violently that the screen shattered.

"Mind your own business."

...

The years have flashed by since that day. Now, compared to the past where our relationship was like fire and water and utterly incompatible, everything that we have experienced now seems like a dream.

We spent the holidays together after graduation and always stuck together, surpassing what a sibling relationship is supposed to be.

Probably because of our recent conflict, I remembered that past?

Now, I was lounging in my bikini on the pool chair after wetting myself in the pool, while my brother sipped his lemonade.

"What are you thinking about, sister?" he asked me, who was in a state of nostalgia.

In the past, he would call me Arisu, never 'sister'; we had never been that close. It was just like living with a stranger in one room.

"I just miss our past, brother," I said as I closed my eyes.

My brother approached and leaned in closer to my lips.

We decided to enjoy our moment, rocking in our bikini and boxer as we kissed each other under the morning sun.

And let lust consume us.