The Waifu Collab

The excitement of yesterday had come and gone. I arrived for my shift just in time.

"Well look who decided to grace us with his presence," I say as I enter.

Jessie was slumped over the counter, his chin length brown mop of hair was barely visible behind the laptop screen. He was never the guy to focus much on his looks, part of his "tragic artist" persona.

"How's that script coming along?"

"Mmm." It wasn't much of a reply, but acknowledgement was good enough.

"Anything exciting happen this morning?"

"Delivery guy left that." Jessie's eyes never left his screen as he pointed towards the three boxes of ice cream that had been sitting out for four hours by the time I saw it.

"Jessie! What the heck? That needs to be frozen!" In a flurry I tossed aside my backpack and grabbed a box and rushed to the back. Within a few moments they were all in the freezer, and I was on the floor catching my breath.

My thoughts drifted for a moment.

"Thanks for making my first day a memorable one, Ken." Mil's words ran through my mind. She wasn't really an expressive person, and at most times her face wasn't the most approachable. In that moment, behind the frazzled, panicked demeanor, her smile was blinding.

My trance was promptly broken as Jessie, uniform two sizes too big, lifeless tired eyes and a general aura of ill-preparedness, came blasting through the door.

"I need to take a break," he barked. The urgency of the moment evaporated immediately.

"I can tell you've been working really hard..." My tone was doing a poor job of hiding my lack of enthusiasm.

"I wrote sixteen pages, that's like sixteen minutes of film."

"Never been more proud of you." I rose to my feet and grabbed my apron. A few moments later I was on company time.

"Why are you sweaty?" asked Jessie.

It took every ounce of self control I had left in my body to not shake him.

"I just had to run back those boxes of ice cream, or didn't you notice?"

"But ice cream is cold."

"Jessie, why the heck didn't you have him drop it in the freezer?"

"That's not really why I'm here, man."

The conversation going nowhere, I left to go open my register.

I made sure to survey the shop one more time, just in case there were any more emergencies that would need my attention. Then the ring chimed to signal a customer.

"Hey there, welcome to Uni–"

Standing in the doorway was Mil in street wear.

"Oh hey Mil. You're off today right?"

"Hey Ken." She shuffled over, eyes shifting around, staying low except when she would peek over the shelves in the aisles.

"You good?"

"I am fine, thank you." Upon reaching the counter she let out a sigh of relief.

"So what's up?" I asked.

Mil stood there avoiding eye contact. She looked smaller than usual. Her hair was in two long braids down both sides that framed her face well.

"I… Uhm… Happened to be in the neighborhood. So I figured I would stop in and say hi."

I looked at the clock and thought back to the other day. It was just after the lunch rush, about the same time that her dad's friend poked in his ugly mug. I leaned in across the counter.

"No worries, the coast has been clear. I just got here, besides some maltreated ice cream boxes, there hasn't been anything exciting today," I whispered.

She relaxed.

"Thanks, Ken. It's just that… Well, my dad doesn't know that I work here. Since the other day, I've been on edge. Just waiting around for… his name is Dave, to say something to him."

"Yeah you mentioned something about that… Dave seemed pretty drunk, I wouldn't be surprised if he doesn't even remember coming here, let alone seeing you."

"I hope so–"

Mil was cut off by Marcus barging through the door.

"Gang, we got a problem! Jessie, get your ass out here!" called Marcus.

Like a slug Jessie came out from the back.

"Mil, I am so happy to see you. This is an all hands on deck situation!" Marcus continued.

"Ronnie coming?" asked Jessie.

"All hands that are currently on deck, situation." Marcus was holding a box, clutched tight to his chest.

"So… Marcus, what's in that box?" I asked.

"Oh you noticed?" Marcus set the box down on the counter and opened it.

"That can't be…" I placed my hand on my head. "How long do we have?"

"The tweet just went out," said Marcus.

"They'll be descending upon us at any moment," added Jessie.

"Gang, battle stations. Millicent, I hate to do this to you, but can you work today?"

"Uhm… Yes? What is going on?" she answered.

"Great!" called Marcus.

I walked over to Mil and placed my hand on her shoulder.

"No matter what happens, we'll get through this together."

"What the heck is happening!?" she became even more frazzled.

"Oh that's right, you're new… Corporate just dropped a new promotional item. This place is about to become a warzone," said Marcus.

"Spotted down the block captain!" Jessie shouted back.

"We're out of time. Mil go punch in then get on the register with me."

Mil nodded then ran into the back.

"They just passed the fitness store!"

"I'm almost set up!" called Marcus.

"They're upon us!"

I gulped at the anticipation for what was about to come bursting through that door. Mil emerged without a moment to spare and opened up the register next to me. Marcus had just put the final touches on the display and nodded to Jessie.

Jessie opened the door.

A flood of bodies came rampaging through the narrow doorway, cussing, scraping against each other, arms outstretched ready to grab whatever they could. These shoppers were more akin to a zombie horde but instead of brains it was… Collectible figurines of popular characters dressed in Unit Mart uniforms.

"Marcus, you didn't say it was–"

"The waifu collab."

The neckbeard stench filled the entire space. People who lurked the reddit pages, the twitter accounts, and fan websites and discords just to get word on these promotional drops.

"I'd like to buy this!" shouted a customer before another ripped the figure from his clutches.

Jessie stood at the door, baseball bat in hand to deter any shoplifters.

"How many do we have?" I called.

"We got three boxes this time. I asked for more since we ran out so fast last time," Marcus called, though his body was lost amidst the mass of people.

"Hey!" I shouted with a commanding energy. The customers stopped and looked at me.

The silence was tangible. They looked like lions waiting for their meal and I was chopped sirloin. I took a deep breath.

"You want these goods? Well listen up. One, we are selling one figure per customer. Two, if you want another item, then you will have to wait to see what is left at the end. And three, you will get into an orderly line or I will not be selling anything to any of you." They just stared back at me. "Well, let's go!"

At my word they formed a single file line. The customers would tell Mil what item they wanted and she would grab it for them, and by the time they got to me, I would check them out.

The line went down the block, and the shift seemed to drag forever. I looked over at Mil and could see she was fading.

"Hey, need a recharge?"

"Yeah, probably. I didn't expect today to go like this." She looked completely fried.

I grabbed my thermos from my bag, still resting on the floor from when I threw it there earlier. Took the cap off and filled it with the coffee within.

"Here, have a sip, and take a break, you've been going like this for hours."

"Thanks, I'm good. I can make it, I think. Shift's almost over anyway."

She chugged down the coffee in one go.

"Wow, you must really like coffee."

"Actually I've never had it before. I expected it to be a lot more bitter actually."

"Never?"

"No, why? I usually just drink water."

Within what felt like moments Mil had gone from zero to eighty. She was darting all over the room like a bat out of hell.

"Jessie, can you hand me the thing? Do I need the thing? Are you hot? I'm kind of hot. My heart is beating so fast. Like sooo fast. Like wow my heart has never beat this fast before. Am I okay? Is my heart going to explode?"

"If I were writing this scene, there is a very real chance that it would. I've been really into hyper gore lately," said Jessie who had come to grab something, only to return to the doorway.

"Well, that's disgusting. Hey Ken... What is up with that coffee you gave me?" She yelled across the room as she ran directly to me. Pushing past two customers and slamming into the counter to stop her momentum. "I need to sit down."

She plopped down right there in front of the register. The customers moved around her to buy their goods. I walked over to her and kneeled down beside her. I handed her some water and a bag of chips.

"Here. You probably didn't eat anything either," I said.

"My stomach hurts so bad. And my heart is pounding so fast. And I just want to run. Do you think I should run?"

"I do not. But here, let's get you behind the counter at least." I helped her up and walked her around the counter, sitting her on the stool we kept back there.

"I can see the end of the line!" Jessie called, tears in his eyes.

"Alright soldier. You did great, but you're gonna sit this one out. Take your break, that's an order."

"Yeah, alright, I'll be right here," Mil replied.

The last leg of the rush was easy to handle, there wasn't much stock left and with the end in sight, everyone had a positivity that helped carry us through.

Finally the last customer was gone.

"Good work everyone!" said Marcus.

"I hate collabs," added Jessie.

"Hey Jessie, isn't this the character you like?" I held up a package with a blue haired girl inside sporting a blue hoodie.

Jessie moved like lightning. As I blinked the item was plucked from my hands.

"I would like to purchase this please." Jessie was already at the counter. Mil smiled a confused smile back at him and rang him up.

My shift over, I grabbed my belongings and made a beeline for the door.

"Hey, Ken?"

I came to a halt as Mil's voice snuck into my ear.

"What's up?"

"This is gonna sound strange. I have been standing here for the last ten minutes, just lingering by the doorway. I just can't seem to push myself through the door. It's like I'm stuck."

She was avoiding something. If I were to use what little info I've gathered, it was probably something related to her dad.

"Come on, we're taking a walk." I pushed lightly on her back.

"Wait, what?" from the push she stumbled out the door.

"It's nice out. You don't have to go home right away do you? I kind of feel like getting some steps in."

"Oh– Oh! Yes. I could go for a walk," she replied.

"Bye Marcus. Don't have too much fun without us!"

Jessie was talking Marcus' ear off about whatever his latest script was about.

"I don't think I could if I tried," Marcus shouted back.

Within seconds we were on the street and walking down the block.

I had my bag over my shoulder, and she seemed to be fixated on her notepad.

"So, you take a lot of notes, huh?" I started.

"Oh… Yeah, it's a habit I got from my mom. I jot everything down, so I don't forget anything important," replied Mil.

"That's awesome. Most people just write everything in their phones these days."

"I could never. You lose something when you just mash everything into your screen. I think the act of actually writing it down really helps me commit it to memory."

"I've heard about that before. I think I'm the same way. Growing up I would remember the notes I wrote in my notebook more than anything I typed into my computer," I mused.

"The only downside is there are notepads everywhere in my room. Whole paychecks could just go to stationery and I would barely notice it. It's a slippery slope."

"Well, I mean you'll always have one in reach if you need to jot anything down, right?"

"No way! I can't put cooking notes in the same notepad as I do story ideas or whatever else I write. I'd never be able to find anything," Mil said Mil, clutching her notebook tight.

"The ink companies must love you."

"From what I understand, I am responsible for their bonuses last Christmas."

I stopped at a vending machine and bought two drinks, an iced tea and a bottle of water.

"Here you go." I handed her the water. "Nothing caffeinated for you, miss never had coffee before."

"Did I make a mess back there?"

"You had a moment where I was pretty sure you were going to break through the sound barrier. But no, you were fine. Wish I knew about your lack of caffeine experience though. I would not have given you some of my cold brew without cutting it with water first."

"My heart was beating so fast." She poked at her drink.

"Caffeine can do that to you."

"But it tasted so good!"

"Thanks, brewed it myself."

"You do stuff like that?" Her eyes were wide with wonder.

"I take my coffee very seriously."

We sat there sipping our drinks for a moment in strange yet comfortable silence.

"So, you look like you're feeling better now," I said.

"Me? Oh the coffee's worn off by now, I think." She felt her heartbeat in her chest to confirm.

"That's not what I meant. Whatever was on your mind earlier. Right now you seem like you're carrying a lot less baggage."

"Oh, that. Was I so obvious?"

"I've walked through that door too many times in my life. I've never had some magical force stop me where I stood before."

"Well, you kind of know my deal already," she said.

"The stuff about your dad?"

"Yup, that's the stuff…" She took a big gulp of her water, polishing off the bottle. Then tossed it into the recycling bin, sinking it in one shot.

"Nice! Nothing but net," she cheered.

"You're a natural, do you play?"

"Yeah, I used to play on the team in middle school. But that was a long time ago…" She stood up, hands on her hips and leaned towards me. "Anyway, I owe you for the drink."

"Don't mention it."

"Fine, I'll get you back when you least expect it."

"Great, now I'll have to sleep with one eye open."

"Uh oh, look out! I'll sneak into your bedroom just to give you a soda!"

"Truly terrifying, you're really going to haunt my nightmares."

"Good, as intended." She seemed proud of herself.

I took a sip of my tea.

"Well I'm off. Thanks for being a distraction. It was nice that you noticed."

"More than happy to push you out the door whenever you need it."

"Bye then."

"Stay safe going home."

She waved and took her leave. I sat there sipping my drink until I could no longer see her. I didn't want to have that awkward moment where we say goodbye only to then just walk in the same direction.