44 A Mad Alchemist's Multiverse Shenanigans: Jumpchain SI by shadowdice

A mad mans shennanigans its hilarious and quite good hope you enjoy it and he is also quite horny so read at your own risk lol

Words: 355k+

Link: https://forum.questionablequesting.com/threads/7124

Jumper and the Gang Drink and Conspire, or It's Always Sunny in Lotto Valentino

Spoiler: Basic Build

Free, Pregnancy is a myth, living art, playboy, porn physics.

Bodymod 600

Medium, 100 athlete (2 speed free, 2 dex free, flex 1), 100 speed 4, 100 dex 4, sense 1 50, strength 1 50, 200 endurance 4 (Total: 600)

Warehouse 150

Utilities: 10 elect, 10 plumbing, 10 heat/ac, 30 local net (60)

Strucutres: shelving free, 20 housing workshop 10 (30)

Misc Return 20, 2 stasis pods (150)

Universal Drawbacks

Single-Shot: +100 (companions don't rez until end of jump unless you have a power)

Coutring Disaster: +150 (at least one BBEG or dragon becomes a yandere)

Start at the beginning +100, start at birth and spend all that time until canon starts; imported companions get the +100 as well

Jealousy: That bitch (Angry when people try to get with significant other). +50.

Lust: simple biology +50. Facial tick. (Days without sex cause facial ticks that cause people to think I haven't been laid in awhile)

Avarice: All the shiny and For the Hoard: +100

Possessed Possessive Possessions: +200 cp for items.

Total: 550 cp and +200 for items

Spoiler: Let's Get Dangerous

Lets Get Dangerous Challenge.

Can Play it Safe or Get Dangerous

Get Dangerous Means: follow main characters and be present as they progress through the canon plot, can effect outcome but the more dangerous events from canon tend to occur in some form no matter what. Remain in jump until end of canon or ten years (whichever is later). Must use canonish means to resolve canon conflicts unless the out of jump powers are plausible.

Get Dangerous Benefits: costs for origin and races waives, Drop in gets +100 cp. Pick second line of perks/items for discount. Take one canon character as a ompanion for free. If there are drawbacks that would put me on the railroad tracks I can take them without adding to the limit of cp I can take.

Generic Jumps: Get Dangerous= pick any +200 cp drawback or higher and doubling severity.

Play it Safe: purchase as normal, but can't take drawbacks

Baccano Gauntlet: +550 normal, +200 items normal. +300 no memories of baccano. +300 a meeting with death. (1350)

A meal of fate: Szilard hunting me, Truth of an Immortal: cannot put a false name on any document and cannot lie about name in front of another immortal

Rolled 21. True Immortal free (need immortal to touch head while thinking I want to eat or atomic destruction to die), eating: can eat other immortals to gain memories.

100 playing with homunculi, 200 lesser immortality, 400 knowledge of the grand panacea, 200 trustworthy (900), 200 regenerating moneyx2 (two bags of coins equivalent to $10,000 each. Regenerate weekly), 100 homunculus, 100 another homunculus (1300)

Spoiler: Current Body

[img: http://danbooru.donmai.us/data/sample/__paracelsus_fate_prototype_fate_prototype_fragments_of_blue_and_silver_and_fate_series__sample-ec6d6f2db19be506f3568a83c5e3e2be.jpg]

Current name Mihaly 'Misi/Miska' -Age: 19 Location: Lotto Valentino

I sighed while Elmer whittled a flute. There was a harsh pounding on the locked door as Huey screamed at us to let him out. "You ridiculous maniacs let us out or else I will shoot both of you in the gut and throw you into the ocean!"

A knife impaled itself through the oak door. "Miska," A cheery voice pierced through high and clear. "Why did you lock us in a room filled with wine? I promise if you have a good explanation we will not leave your body in the streets with a mask over it." Monica was a scary person a heart.

Elmer gave me a sideglance. "I… well she would not do it when she realizes our intentions."

"And what is that?" Huey impaled another knife through the door.

"Just kiss already, Monica killed over a score of people before you had meaningful conversations. She is crazy for you, and you are a megalomaniac Huey. The two of you are perfect for each other," I teased.

Huey's knife stabbed through the door again, though Monica did not react from what you could see.

"Guys you can either try to stab your way out of it, or you can just kiss. One is easier than the other," Elmer laughed. There was a long silence. "And no neither of us are going to put our eyes at the holes to check. You might stab us." He went back to making a flute.

Hours of our prisoners trying to stab an opening in the door there was a low moan.

I smiled. "See, this is better than tricking them to be in a house alone." More sounds came out of the room. "Let's just push the key through the door and see how long it takes for them to figure it out."

Elmer grinned back at me. "Miska that is perfect."

-Several Months later Workshop-

I returned to my 'home' from the Third Library and began to think. The foreknowledge I should have of the universe I had been reborn into were blurry. Without a doubt I had watched Baccano and read some of the books, but the memories of the plot were completely gone. Certainly I remembered that some people were important such as Elmer, Huey, Monica, and my father, but what they did in it were unknown to me.

There was one thing I did know though. I would eventually be on a ship known as Advena Avis where I would get access to the Grand Panacea. That was fate, there would be a time I entered that ship with a group of alchemists even if I was already immortal.

But why was an important question.

Still as long as I was in the 1700s I sure as hell was going to make things cleaner. People still thought Miasma was a thing. And the water, oh God the water. Not to mention the smell of the city. I shuddered as the memory of putting the filthy water under my improved microscope.

I had spent years finding van Leeuwenhoek's research and improving the microscope to show the people what unspeakably horrible things they were constantly drinking.

For a moment I sobbed, remembering being forced to drink untreated water in my second childhood. "Animalcules again?" A soft voice called from the couch. Lazing on it was Isabel, the woman I had decided to 'keep' around to deal with my lust drawback. Italy was a mixed bag, even for the time period. On one hand there were a lot of artists, I could visit plenty of interesting places, and it was easy to get pleasures, on the other there was still slavery and it was fucking dirty. Isabel was a mix of those things. I had basically bought her before a brothel could put her to work, and it had taken time to get her to understand my modern ideas on cleanliness. But she jumped into bed at a moment's notice and was hot. Spoiler

[img: http://danbooru.donmai.us/data/sample/__original_drawn_by_sukage__sample-05e7c04cdbdd146fa093cfb0b87c7178.jpg]

There were other benefits as well, namely having managed to get her to become a decent lab assistant. It was always good to delegate boring labor to others, such as watching over the vats of fermenting alcohol.

Another thing microscopes were good for, figuring out what was good for fermenting booze. Whiskey, beer, and about any other fermentation based alcohol could be made easily enough once you had enough hands.

The actual goddamn problem was flavoring the things.

Huey made money making fake gold, other alchemists were peddling drugs, I went the legal route by buying warehouses and turning them into distilleries. I'd joke that I was on the moral highground, but I was helping Huey run a street gang/serial killer conspiracy.

Truthfully all I had to do with the alcohol was make the formulas and throw my weekly money at the operations. Everything else was run by people I had hired. Once I became immortal I had a fairly good set up to keep myself entertained.

Isabel moved from the couch and wrapped her arms around me. "It's that time." I looked at the clock, seven in the afternoon. So yes, it was the time I had scheduled to take care of that. I turned my chair around pulled her shirt lower to reveal perky breasts with bright pink nipples.

She took the signal and loosened my belt before taking the half-hardened shaft into her mouth.

At the same moment Isabel was going to start sucking the door burst open as Elmer tumbled in. "It's horrible the playhouse is telling stories about Huey and Mon-" He stared at the situation you were in. Isabel glared at him, my shaft still in her mouth.

I sighed. "We need to get those two and before any of those three do something stupid." It was time to finally get the Grand Panacea out before they all got killed. Just another day in the life of Mihaly Quates. Isabel looked back up to me. "Well I didn't tell you to stop."

-4 Hours Later-

Huey frowned as the current facts were laid out. "So then we need to find out who made the play, where he got this information from, and eliminate them."

Elmer scratched the back of his head. "That makes sense. We should assume the playwright knows what you two look like, or at least whoever gave him the information."

Isabel yawned. "The plays that have been acted out there are almost all by a man named Jean-Pierre who lives in the city. He goes to the playhouse fairly often so I am likely to be spotted," Everyone but Monica turned to her at that. "I go there with Monica a lot."

"So you three are out. How should we entrap a playwright?" Elmer's narrow eyes turned to me as he hummed. "Would you be willing to wear a disguise Miska?" Oh God.

I deflected his insinuation off. "Huey has the legs and face to pull it off."

The Frenchman blinked and took a step backwards. "What are you two plotting?"

"Well I think Miska could pull off entrapping an artist," Elmer explained. "Between all the girls I am sure we can make a disguise which fits."

I decided to ignore the smile maniac and make for the wine cabinet. Two bottles were displayed prominently within, one full of a golden liquid, and another with actual wine. As everyone argued about the latest murder plot I set the table with glasses and mixed the drinks together. "Everyone," I declared. "A toast to murder."

Isabel stared at the golden bottle. "Are you certain?"

"At this point it cannot hurt."

Huey scrutinized the drinks. "More of your specialty alcohol?" I raised an eyebrow. "Of course it is." He took a sip and waited for the aftertaste. "Surprisingly sweet." In good Italian fashion everyone sampled the wine. "Still we need to plan this out."

Instead I stabbed myself in the hand with a dagger. The blade had come down at a slight angle instead of the straight stab I had intended. It split my hand down the middle, chopping my middle finger off with the very tip of the knife. The lost appendage flew across the table with a bloodtrail sputtering out while my hand showed muscle and bone to the world.

Monica screamed as blood spurted onto Huey's face. The Frenchman stared in me in a mix of confusion and a slight amount of horror uncharacteristic of the scientist. Elmer grabbed a towel and ran to me only to stumble as my blood defied the known laws of physics by flying back into my body. I pulled the knife out and watched as the wound sealed itself, returning to its original state.

"Well my Panacea worked at least like the lesser one, we will need to wait a while to see if we still age. Congratulations none of us can be murdered." I turned back to the group. "So… want to get some knives and hunt down whoever is trying to fuck with us?"

Huey looked back at the wine. "The golden liquid?"

"Yes."

His eyes widened slightly. "I could continue my research for eternity." Yeah I might have created Vandal Savage. Oh well, we had a conspiracy to deal with. Hopefully Huey wouldn't go full evil overlord and burn the place down to cover his tracks.

Why couldn't I just make lewd homunculi and apprentices to screw until the 1930s? I feel like the blame is on a French guy. One who needs a firepoker through the eye.

Wait. If immortals regenerated by bodyparts and fluid returning what did that mean for refractory periods? I was fairly certain immortals could have children so that meant semen didn't just fly back inside them. So did new semen get automatically generated somehow? Actually no, it didn't matter since I had porn physics put on. Though this definitely meant I could go on a lot longer. There were so many things I could do with this.