A tragic Faith
"I'm okay dear, you don't have to worry" Han bilu gave Lu Man's hand a light squeeze to assure her she was fine. Looking out of the car window...
"Sigh... You know, you were right. Maybe if I hadn't been so stubborn and actually listened to you, I could have avoided alot of things. Maybe I wouldn't be as hurt as I am now."
Turning her sight back to Lu Man, she continued "You know, after I discovered everything last night, I thought everything must be a joke or a prank, anything other than the truth. I so wished it was a dream. because I didn't think I would be able to handle it if it wasn't. So despite after I've accepted the truth.. despite deciding I'll move on with my life and make them both regret what they did, despite waking up this morning with the determination to be more successful than they both will ever be. despite waking up with the mindset of taking my revenge on them, But.. But.. a part of me still wished it was all a lie. A part of me still hoped everything to just be one bad nightmare and everything would go back to the way they were once I wake up. Sister Lina would still be my elder sister who always loved me and not the betrayal who had been having an affair with my fiance. Brother Mubai would still be the same man I admire so much, who despite being cold to me at times, still took great care of me and would always grant me whatever I wished for. The same brother Mubai who always spoiled me and not the jerk who betrayed me and had an affair with his fiancee elder sister. My family would still remain my strength and the loving family I've always knew. The family who loved and spoiled me the most and not the vultures who who have only been using me for years and would get rid of me once they get their wish."
With tears rolling down her eyes, Han bilu sniffed and continued "Before stepping into that private room, I so much wished I was wrong in my judgement. That it was all a dream.That it was all a figment of my imagination. I wanted reality to prove me wrong"
"But now, the reality has dawned on me. It wasn't a dream afterall. I was wrong afterall.. You were right afterall.. Everything I saw and heard last night was right and real. This is my reality now and not a dream." Exhaling a long breath Han bilu took a tissue and carefully wiped the drop of tears on her face.
"Actually it doesn't hurt as much as I thought it would you know.. maybe because already, I prepared my heart for this since last night. So am not that hurt or should I say miserable as I thought I'll be, if I ever don't get married to Chen Mubai." Looking at Lu Man, Han bilu couldn't help but chuckle and add "Atleast not as miserable as you were when you broke up with Henry after you found out he was cheating on you."
"Hahahahahaha tsk tsk" Lu Man laughed out loud after Han bilu poked fun at her miserable state after her breakup years back. Thinking back at it now, she can't believe she was ever that stupid to cry and starve over a jerk like that. Anyway, she is glad her friend isn't feeling that miserable. she has been there, so she for one, knows how dark of a place it is and how hard it is coming out of it stronger than ever.
"Anyways I'm glad you are fine. maybe not that fine but always know I'm here for you. You'll come out stronger than this dear, ok?." Holding Han bilu's hands, Lu Man assured.
"Mmhmm" nodding her head Han bilu replied. She gave Lu Man a light smile before looking out of the car window, staring at nothing in particular.
There was something she didn't tell Lu Man. The fact that she didn't feel that hurt was because, rather than feeling hurt, what she felt was anger, and a desire for vengeance. And above all, she felt the desire to change her current faith. A faith that had been designed to her, for God knows how long now. One in which her ending is already determined and stamped. A tragic faith....