[EX] Uncertainty (3)

"Why you feel so empty huh--"

In a vast realm of white, seated on the sofas arranged in parallel were two individuals. One of them was me of course.

Opposite to me was the goddess Bleu. With beautiful sky blue hair cascading down from her head and forming whirls on the sofa cushion, her golden eyes shone like the sun. Wearing a white blouse with a coat and loose-long skirt, she pointed a ladle at me..

"Where did you get that ladle from?" I swear she was holding onto a toy sword just a moment ago..

"This? It's a ladle disguised as a sword."

What logic is that..

"Putting that aside, the question to why you feel so empty.. to be honest, there's a lot of reasons why you feel this way. The impetus is definitely because of the incident with Lyndia, so assuming this question is one of the effects of being inflicted with some trauma, the best option you have is to spend time and go through self-introspection," Bleu twirled the ladle in the air, "Time is necessary, so you can take you time to think about why."

There's no shortcut to this I guess..

Leaning my back against the sofa prepared, I brought up my UI.

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Evolution Quest:

TASK: Resolve issue.

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The evolution quest is still there ever since this one person named Hiro used his TALENT to evolve my TALENT. It's been more than a month now. So does this mean the real 'issue' is this feeling? I've made so many guesses, I don't know what exactly this 'issue' the evolution quest is talking about anymore. There's no further description to clarify anything. It might even be a bug.

"Noel, have you ever thought about purpose?" Bleu stopped spinning the ladle.

"Purpose? Not really?"

I've lived my life as I pleased without going too deep into why we should do this and do that. Human beings help each other and contribute to society in whatever field or surroundings they live in-- whether they're aware of it or not. Thinking to 'find a true purpose in life' is like trying to shackle yourself. Humans are dynamic creatures that change after all.

Though I may hope to become an artist someday.. this young dream of mine is somehow fading. All for pleasure huh? I wonder if that's really the case..

"That's probably why," Bleu had a finger to her chin.

"What do you mean?"

Because I don't feel like achieving anything? That's pretty normal isn't it? There are times when you just don't feel like doing what you said you want to do. Does not doing count as pleasure?

"That's not what I'm trying to say.. uh. It's something like you should have vowed to keep the ideals you have close to you, and keep working on it."

Well, to put in another sense-- it's like being materialistic or possessive? Be it a skill, craft, money or property. It becomes an endless loop of trying to not lose what you earned when-- once you die, you bring nothing with you no matter how hard you try.

--that is if you don't get transmigrated.

"Not that you should obsess over living, but perhaps what you need is to feel like you're part of your own world-- as in your community. By achieving a purpose and helping people."

Hm.. that makes sense yet doesn't make sense. Will it cure me of this emptiness though? What is life exactly? What are humans meant to do? Besides surviving, it's helping one another survive isn't it?

"I think I get it, I'm pretty isolated aren't I?"

I've been doing things for my own sake. Be it getting good grades, working to become an artist, taking care of Liliath-- it's all for myself. And doing it all for myself is.. perhaps the reason why I feel so empty. It's like the world is just me, no one else-- why I feel lonely and empty.

"I wouldn't say I entirely agree with you, nor would I say you're wrong-- but feel free to interpret what I say in your own way. This is after all-- your story," Bleu showed me a motherly smile.

She's truly a goddess alright.

"Thank you," Bleu then struck a comical pose, the ladle placed to her cheek.. that's a sword right? "Something like a sword can't possibly kill me."

Haah.. I sometimes forget that Bleu can read minds. Speaking of which, where's Liliath?

"Bleu, is there any way to turn Liliath into a human or-- no. Will I actually become a demon? What would happen then?"

"You're asking that?" Bleu placed the ladle on her chin, "Hm.. at least not yet."

"Huh? What does that mean?"

"Look, it's a spoiler. You and Liliath are bound to be together, so don't sweat the small stuff."

"Seriously now?" So I just have to pucker up and do it?

"Yup-- It is weird how she's not here today isn't it? I even prepared something for your visit this time," she dodged the question.

Doesn't sound convincing but considering how she's a goddess and part of my TALENT, perhaps she has some deeper insight into this whole ordeal. That said.. this goddess is up to no good again..

"What did you prepare this time.."

"You've heard of food laced with tea right? Like noodles in tea or steak with grounded tea to give it an aroma-- I thought to have Liliath try it and see if it suits her."

I feel like even Bleu is getting infected by Liliath's obsession with tea.

"People actually eat these in your world though? Didn't you watch a documentary about this last time?"

"I guess."

Bleu wasn't wrong. The last time we turned on the television-- which we rarely even do, it just happened to show a food documentary about the various uses of tea in the culinary world…

Hm?

"Hey Bleu, how did you know we watched that tea documentary two days ago?"

"Eh.. uh.."

Don't tell me..

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Sitting there quietly in the dark, I waited. The sound of the door clicking open. Though there weren't any corporeal entities visible to the naked eye, four shadows came in alternately. How brutish of them.

One of them broke apart from the rest and opened the fridge. The other three froze in shock.

"What the hell is this?!" the one that broke off from the main group asked.

"Hey! We're not here to steal food.."

"What brings the four of you here?" I asked, bringing the lights on and shutting the door to stop the frosty air from leaking in.

"""We're sorry."""

"Eh? What.. how?!"

Three of the four uninvited guests prostrated in front of me.

"Could I hear an explanation?" I went and sat on the dining table, taking a sip of my cup of warm tea. A while ago, I felt four presences flickering around our apartment, so I thought to keep vigilance.

The guests came in quite late in the night. I believe everyone had already gone to bed, with the exception of Nine who I took a temporary stream time-out to deal with these people. The guests could've come in an appropriate way, now I'm wondering how I should deal with them. Killing isn't an option, though I would very much prefer it.

Of the four uninvited guests I recognize Brusq and Nile, as they were both in charge of supervising my actions within the school compound. The two other human females I have seen around the school, but never got to know them.

"So does this count as a failed assignment?" the female one closed the fridge tepidly and asked.

"Pst, just apologize already.." Nile hissed.

"I don't get it.. but I apologize for entering your home unwarranted. In the first place it was a test assigned by First Lieutenant Sander," the female that prostrated laughed in a troubled manner.

"So it's a test? How so? Why our place of all places? What would be the task?"

"The test is simply to put this piece of paper inside the living room table where everyone can see. That's all I know, I came as a support, the real exam takers are the two of them there, Nile and Brusq" pointing at the two, one of the girls said.

"Why would there be a need for an exam?"

"Because these two failed," the other girl prostrating raised her head and said.

"No, no, no.. it's not like that. We didn't fail, it's just for the sake of bonus marks since our scores were low," Brusq said.

"So to summarise, Mimi and I, Juniper, are here to just support the two in the infiltration," the female that sought after the fridge, Juniper said.

"And thanks to 'someone', our bonus marks just flew away like that.." Nile grumbled.

"Sorry!" Juniper said.

"I would have liked it if you informed me beforehand," I relaxed my shoulders and took another sip of tea. "Then I would've been able to retrain myself to a degree. Now, go on with your job and leave."

"Y-yes.."

Dejected, Nile and Brusq walked over to the living room table and placed something like a note.

"I suppose it is inappropriate to have the guests leave just like this," I muttered to myself as I observed my own reflection from the surface of the liquid, "How about some tea?"

"No thanks, but thanks for the offer," Mimi said, an awkward smile on her face.

"Hah? But it's a good opportunity isn't it. Since those two have failed already?" Juniper kept glancing at the fridge. Was there something in there? I believe she learnt of the items Noel had bought with points?

Nile came up to her and whispered into her ears, she grimaced before nodding. It seems he did something to remove the sound, I would've normally been able to hear what he was saying from this distance.

"I guess we'll take our leave then. Thanks for the invite Liliath, but I just realized we have to report to the Lieutenant ASAP."

It would usually be quite impolite to deny an invitation like this, though it seems to be normal in this world's customs. It would be more appropriate to say that: it's normal to reject a drink from someone you aren't familiar with.

"If that is the case then please answer this question first before leaving."

The four of them visibly froze up.

"What do you think life is?" I asked. I want their opinions on the matter. Especially when Noel's problem is related to such a paradox inducing question.

"L-life? Um, what kind of context are you referring to?"

"Based on your personal opinion."

"Life huh? I think it's really not about the question, it's really about how human psychology works and the growth stages. Since everyone asks this question at least once in their life... It's like this dip in life before it rises again so that your mind can grow and mature," Nile gave his explanation.

"What a mature answer. My thought is that life is just life. Nothing really much about it, just eat, sleep, work, work, work, work, eat, eat, eat.."

"Okay, you can stop with that," Brusq said to Juniper who had her eyes glued to the fridge, "I agree with Nile's way of thinking. But to add my own twist, to me, life is an experience, a temporary event."

"Temporary?" I asked.

"AH YES! It's something like a religious teaching where they say our life on earth is temporary, right? True life is found in heaven or something like that. The life we live now is a test to see if we go to heaven or hell. Do you go to church?" Mimi followed up on Brusq's remark.

"No, it's not the first time I've heard of this church. I assume the gods worshiped are different?"

It seems there are groups that worship this world's gods too. Though.. its unnerving to think that there exists this concept that our life is but a test. It's not a teaching I've ever read up from my world.

"Don't take it too seriously though, I'm sure the meaning behind it is to tell us to be good and not do bad stuff."

"Understood, thank you for your information."

I suppose there are a number of answers to this paradoxical question. Though, what answer does Noel wish to find?

"I allow you to leave now, thank you."

"Wait, since you asked a question, I have a question too," Juniper said.

"And what would that be?"

"What are those golden things in the fridge?"

I see-- it's the life fruit that she saw. To her question, I smiled. "Do you want to try some?"

"Yes please!"

"Hey wait, we have to report our failure to the Lieutenant isn't it?!" Mimi retorted.

"Liliath? Are you okay? Eh? Who are them?" Nine came to the living room and called out. Nine had returned to her female form, I myself prefer this side of her.

"Sorry, I was busy entertaining our guests," turning to Nine who appeared in the corridor.

"What.."

"Crap."

"Oh, so this is why.. but Liliath, you're nothing hiding anything from us are you?" Nine asked.

"What would I hide?" Perplexed by her question I asked.

"Just asking. So why are these four people here, our seniors? Eh.. one of them is you!"

I noticed Mimi's smile stiffen at his words. I wonder how they are related.

"So what brings the four of them here?"

"It seems they wanted to place a piece of paper here as part of an exam," referring to the piece of paper on the table.

"And so they failed?" Nine traced my gaze and picked up the paper.

"Apparently so," I said.

Nine opened it up to read the contents, "What is this?"

"What does it say?" Mimi asked.

"You didn't read it?" Nine looked at them in disbelief.

"We were only told to bring it here."

"It says Liliath is invited to some kind of meeting for the field trip."

"What meeting?"I asked.

"Have a read, I have no clue either."

"Doesn't this mean this exam is an absolute failure?" Mimi asked.

"I think so," Juniper replied.

After reading the notice and serving them a few slices of life fruit, whilst explaining how it was an unknown fruit we bought in the market, an obvious lie they did not notice, we had them leave for the night.

""Thanks.."" Nile and Brusq sounded crestfallen. Unfortunately for them, it was their blunder.

The four of them went out the front door. Their presence moving further and further away. Looking at the note, the contents written. I wondered if it's an obligation?