1 Thank you for dying, come back soon! (Brotherhood)
AN: Rewritten Chapter (10/21/2023) My little brother is an S-Rank villain for fun!
This story will contain images, gifs, and videos edited in order to guarantee a better immersion.
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My Chaos Academia: Brotherhood
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Chapter 1: Thank you for dying, come back soon!
"Come on, kill the protagonist!" I exclaim irritably, throwing popcorn at my television screen, watching as the villain on duty is unable to defeat the protagonist, who lies defenseless on the ground. He is right in front of you!
"Break his neck, shoot him... Do something." I growl on the edge of my seat only to be disappointed to hear the villain explain his evil plan. Red flag!
Needless to mention, conveniently after that, the protagonist had a motivational flashback, allowing him to defeat the villain against all odds... And once again everything is under control thanks to the power of love and friendship!
"Total disappointment! Cliche!" I boo, pointing my thumb down as if I were a Roman Emperor sentencing the episode I just watched to death. 95% of Shonen anime are the same!
Especially My Hero Academia! How can villains be so incompetent? The protagonist should have died in the first season at most... Stupid plot armor.
"I'm sure I'd make an even better villain! Hah!" I exclaim happily with a small shark smile spreading across my face, grabbing the remote and randomly tuning to another channel.
"Diplomatic tensions between East and West continue to rise as more world powers begin to deploy troops to their borders..."
I'm not interested...
"The United Nations (UN) will hold an emergency meeting in the coming hours, meanwhile North Korea and China have promised strategic support to Russia in order to maintain stability in the region..."
Boring...
"Experts assure that the risk of a large-scale military conflict is practically zero, however, some service stations and supermarkets have been overcrowded, causing a considerable increase in the price of gasoline and toilet paper..."
I turn off the TV with a small sinking feeling in my stomach before shaking my head quickly. "The news is very sensational and depressing nowadays." I murmur thoughtfully. I'm sure all this unnecessary drama will be resolved in a couple of days, some agreements here, other agreements there, and a handshake for the cameras.
Stupid adults, don't learn anything from movies and animes... Much less from the mistakes of the past, they are only interested in money regardless of the damage they cause to others. Either way, it's not like I can do anything about it...
But that won't affect my mood! Because today is a very special day for me! Today my parents are returning home after a long business trip around the country to celebrate my fantastic 13th birthday.
And with them but no less important is my birthday gift! A new and improved science kit, with which I plan to get into a lot of mischief without anyone catching me.
Despite being just a kid, I am very cunning and maybe a little manipulative. I can't help it... I love chaos!
Sometimes a child just wants to see the world burn...
I blame TV and video games for that! I'm just a poor victim of the system! Or that's what I always tell my traumatized school counselor, hehe...
Although unfortunately, my intelligence is nothing compared to that of my favorite character from the anime One Punch Man... Child Emperor! What envy! It would be really awesome to build my own giant robot and unleash chaos around me.
It's not bad to dream, but I must consider reality... I still have a long way to go.
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A couple of hours later.
"Why the hell are they taking so long to arrive? My parents should have arrived by now." I mutter, pacing back and forth in front of a small birthday muffin I made myself with an excessive amount of sugar and sweets.
Like any other child, I am addicted to sweets, sugar is like my caffeine and my source of energy.
I should call my parents, but that would make me look weak and desperate. So I just grabbed my phone and started scrolling through YouTube in order to calm this growing feeling in my chest.
"Today we will throw a Lamborghini from a plane into an erupting volcano...!"
"Brrrr, skibidi dop dop dop yes yes..."
"Is not fake! Doomsday is near! World War III is Near! But first, subscribe to my channel to..."
My search was interrupted by a pop-up screen... It was a video call from my parents, which I did not hesitate to answer as a small smile spread across my face.
"Hello son, your father and I are stuck in traffic still far from home... People are a little paranoid after the airports closed." My mother says calmly as the blaring of car horns is heard everywhere, causing my smile to slowly disappear.
"Step aside or I'll step over you! Idiot!" I hear my father exclaim threateningly before he realizes that he is on a video call. "Heh, hello champion... You should see all these people hoarding toilet paper like it's gold, I'm sure you'd love it." He says with a small knowing smile before the communication suffers a little interference.
Possibly the communications are saturated due to the commotion created by the stupid politicians after competing to see who can urinate the furthest. "So I guess you and Mom won't be home today." I mutter, trying to hide my complete disappointment before the camera focuses on my mother again.
"Unfortunately, that is correct, son." She snorts. It's not their fault, that's very clear to me.
"Understood, no problem... I'll be fine." I respond quickly, forcing a small smile as I clench my fists, and my right eyelid trembles slightly unconsciously. Although I would never admit it out loud... I hate being alone.
"Remind him not to play with fire in the house, or blow anything up...Again." I hear my father whisper as the interference gets louder.
"Your father sends his regards, we love you."
"What is that in the sky?"
"Is that a plane?"
"Maybe a bird..."
They murmur among themselves, forgetting to hang up the video call while they look at the sky through the vehicle's windows before everything lit up strangely quickly and the communication was abruptly cut off.
Possibly it was just a silly traffic accident in the distance.
***No signal / No internet...***
Immediately afterward, I grit my teeth in frustration and quickly put on my headphones at full volume, playing a random selection of my favorite music before lighting the small candle and holding my small birthday muffin in my hands.
I just need to release my frustration... Today was supposed to be a special day for me and it was ruined because of the decisions of a group of stupid adults! I just want to scream and insult everyone! I need to go to my happy place!
Then I opened the door to my apartment and ran to the top of the building where I live while I ignored everything that was happening around me. Typical childish tantrum... Or that's what I wanted to believe.
Neighbors ran back and forth, some desperately packing their belongings while others simply stared dumbfounded at some kind of emergency message on their televisions.
None of that mattered to me, I just cared about getting rid of this annoying feeling deep in my chest.
Once I reached the top of my building, I looked at the wonderful view of the chaotic city below my feet and I couldn't help a crooked smile spreading across my face. "Happy birthday to me..." I whisper wryly, blowing out the candle and taking an aggressive bite of my small birthday muffin just before reaching my breaking point and making a wish with my eyes closed.
I know it's a silly and childish wish... But... My twisted heart really...
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I wish I could be like Child Emperor and unleash chaos on the world of My Hero Academia... Those idiots wouldn't stand a chance against me.
Giant robots, lightsabers, robotic tentacles... Everything my twisted mind can imagine.
...Then I would create a world full of Fun... Sweets... And a lot of chaos around me... I'm sure it would be a really fantastic world... A world under my whims. A world where I never feel alone again.
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Then I opened my eyes with strong determination spreading throughout my body and released all my pent-up frustration, throwing my little birthday muffin into the abyss before theatrically spreading my arms to my sides and exclaiming at the top of my lungs.
"To hell with everything! Let the world burn! Let everything burn! Let it burn!"
"MUAHAHAHA!"
I laugh out loud as if I were a villain in an action movie, watching from the top of my building at the little humans running back and forth in panic under my gaze as if they were ants. "Insects." I whisper cheekily, crossing my arms and doing my best imitation of a certain anime character.
"I feel so much better now..." I huff loudly as a small smile spreads across my face. I really needed that.
I hope no one heard me scream because that would be very embarrassing... Also, I hope my little muffin didn't cause an accident down there...
What's the worst that could happen? HAH!
I can't wait to grow up and see what the future holds!
Then suddenly my headphones started playing the opening of My Hero Academia #3 at full volume just before a powerful light covered a large part of the city and everything began to shake violently. My eyes widen in shock and my heart begins to beat dangerously fast as a feeling of doom and fear quickly spread throughout my small body.
Hot! Very hot!
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My eyes widen in shock as I take a deep breath and quickly scan my surroundings on high alert before looking down at my trembling hands. I died...
Hell, I'm pretty sure I died from a nuclear explosion! This time the adults had really ruined everything...
My family was taken from me...
My dreams were taken from me...
My future was taken from me...
"Where I am?" I ask confused, trying to reorganize my thoughts as I observe a huge and strange office around me, decorated with balloons and a colorful poster...
***Happy Fatal Birthday***
What the hell...
"Welcome to the reincarnation office!" A voice exclaims happily from all directions, taking me by surprise just before a small figure quickly materializes in front of me. "My name is Gil!" A little boy exclaims as confetti begins to fall on us.
What a coincidence, he looks a lot like... Is he cosplaying? Because that would be the least strange thing about all of this.
"And I am a god of reincarnation." He says with a small nervous smile, materializing a huge book in his hands before beginning to read some sort of guide.
"You must be very confused and scared... Please do not lose calm... I will be your guide in this difficult process and... You must be very confused... and scared... Please do not lose calm. Wait, I already said that, right?" He stutters, looking nervously at me out of the corner of his eye... His lack of experience is evident.
"I'm dead, I have no doubt about that." I snort, choosing my words carefully as I analyze this strange situation in detail. I need more information to determine my chances... Leaving aside the fact that I'm dead.
"You should have said it before!" He exclaims, perking up instantly before taking a seat behind a huge desk. "That saves us a lot of time." He sighs in relief, relaxing in his seat.
"Everything you knew and loved is gone, turned to dust, gone forever, game over." He says cheerfully, waving his arms nonchalantly to get his point across while I unconsciously grit my teeth. Immediately afterward, his eyes widen in surprise and he palms his face. "Sorry! That was insensitive of me! As you may have noticed, I don't have much experience talking to humans."
"Are you really a god?" I couldn't help but ask, I need to know exactly who I'm dealing with and how I can use this situation to my advantage. "I thought god would be an old man with a white beard or a sexy goddess with huge breasts... Not a boy." I mutter thoughtfully, I need to get information out of him... If my theory is correct, he must be just a...
"Of course, I am a god! I recently passed the exam! I even got my own license!" He exclaims proudly, quickly materializing a strange little license on his desk before looking away from me and clasping his fingers together in nervousness.
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"Though technically... I'm a Junior God in Training..." He mutters with a small smile, scratching his head nervously before beginning to ramble.
That explains a lot...
Immediately afterward, a chill spreads throughout my body before a hand covered in gloomy darkness emerges from the ground and grabs my leg tightly. "What the hell!" I exclaimed in panic, trying to free myself from this thing, punching and kicking it with all my might as this thing tried to drag me into the depths of the burning hole it came from.
Am I being dragged to hell?
"I can't lose another one again! Bad demon! Bad!" Gil exclaims, quickly materializing a sharp sword in his hands before epically leaping and slicing the monstrous hand in half. "Stay away from my client!" He exclaims with determination, watching as the remains of that thing quickly fade away along with the hole in the ground... as if nothing had ever happened.
"What? What the hell was that?" I ask quickly, trying to catch my breath as many thoughts flood my head.
"It was my fault! I'm sorry! I must stay focused to prevent the demons from trying to devour your soul." He explains, dispelling the sword from him and scratching his head innocently.
And he says it now?!
"The other human who came before you was not so lucky. But it wasn't entirely my fault... I promise! He called me incompetent and he asked to speak to my supervisor! So I panicked and lost concentration... It was just a rookie mistake." He says quickly, nodding to himself before raising a thumbs up in my direction. "The second time is the charm." He smiles brilliantly.
I don't feel convinced at all!
"Although it is very strange that demons are attracted to the soul of a child... Children's souls are supposed to be pure." He murmurs, massaging his chin and narrowing his eyes suspiciously in my direction.
I can only blame the internet for staining my innocent soul. Fortunately, my dark secrets stored deep in my browsing history were destroyed and purified with nuclear fire.
"Your soul must be special!" He exclaims happily with an intense shine in his eyes as if it were the most obvious thing.
"Sure... Special." I smiled nervously as beads of sweat slowly slid down my face before swallowing a lump in my throat.
The chances of my soul being devoured by a demon have just increased drastically...
"Now! Without further distractions let's begin the reincarnation process!" He exclaims, jumping into the air with great excitement before snapping his fingers, causing our entire surroundings to change completely.
The strange office was left behind and in its place I now find myself floating uncontrollably in the middle of space while in the distance I observe with interest an earth practically devoid of life with numerous craters. "Doomsday..." I whisper, amazed and horrified.
"You along with the vast majority of the population of your world perished as a result of a large-scale nuclear attack. A nuclear attack in the name of peace... Or that's what world leaders called it." Gil explains, floating with his hands behind his head nonchalantly.
"Eventually your planet will be rebooted by my supervisor, but there is a small waiting list." He snorts with a small smile. "Humans are so complicated."
Immediately afterward, dozens of Earth planets become visible around us, all of them in a similar state to my devastated Earth, leading me to an inevitable conclusion. "Everything is repeated over and over again... And no one learns anything because no one lives long enough to see the patterns." I mutter reflexively before turning my attention to the inexperienced Junior God in training. Why is he showing me this?
Then I understood the reason. "...No one lives long enough to see patterns." He hums quietly with a bright gleam in his eyes, painstakingly taking notes in some sort of school notebook before noticing my gaze and instantly dissipating the notebook.
"Did I just help you with your schoolwork?" I couldn't help but ask with some degree of frustration before realizing how careless I was.
As a result, he starts stuttering some unintelligible things while his cheeks blush intensely and his lips tremble nervously just before a peculiar chill spreads through my body. I don't want a demon to come back for me! I must think of something!
"What happened to those responsible for ending my world?" I ask quickly, slyly deflecting the conversation as he perks up again and the dreaded shiver disappears. That was close.
"Oh, I heard from a sadistic goddess who works in the transmigration department that they will be sent to a universe where only war exists. Space Marines, Orks, and creatures which must not be named!" He responds energetically with a vicious little smile spreading across his face.
There are fates worse than death...
"I almost forgot... Happy birthday Fatal!" He exclaims with great excitement, quickly floating in front of me before shaking my hands, causing our entire surroundings to change again in the blink of an eye.
"Thanks?" I respond a little dazed, as my feet hit the ground again back in the strange office where it all began.
"You died right after making your birthday wish, so..." He mutters, materializing a huge rule book in front of him before beginning to read aloud.
"According to statute C-137, if a person dies from apocalyptic causes just after making a birthday wish, the god responsible must fulfill the last wish in accordance with the terms and conditions of the project (H.B.F) Happy Birthday Fatal." He reads quickly, catching his breath before continuing.
My heart pounds hearing that... The opportunity to fulfill my dream is within my reach!
"Otherwise, if for any reason the soul refuses to accept the terms and conditions of the project (H.B.F). Said soul will return to its world of origin along with the rest of the population, all memories of what happened will be eliminated once the world is recalibrated and restarted."
Wait a minute...
"Souls involved in the apocalypse will be excluded along with souls who have accepted the terms and conditions of the project (H.B.F). The existence and impact of these souls on the world of origin will be eliminated and recalibrated, thus forming a world where they never existed."
Gil finishes reading, slamming the enormous rule book shut before dispelling it. Immediately afterward, he slowly extends both hands forward with a serious look before two small objects materialize in his palms.
The implications of this were clear...
In his right hand was a blue pill while in his left hand was a red pill. "Make a choice... Human."
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"If you take the blue pill it means you reject the terms and conditions... You will return to your normal life without any memory of what happened, as stipulated in the rule book." Gil murmurs as he shrugs nonchalantly.
The possibility of returning to my family and having a normal life... Some people would not hesitate to choose this option. Hell part of me wants to go back and forget all this! But I know for a fact that adults will make the same mistakes again. In that dark world... My future will be sealed.
"If you take the red pill, you accept the terms and conditions... Your wish will come true. Adventure and glory like no other human child has ever experienced!" He exclaims shamelessly with a shitty little smile on his face.
My choice was obvious.
I quickly extended my hand forward and took the red pill as my heart pounded and anticipation grew more and more within me. This time, I will not allow anyone to take my dreams away from me again... This time I will make the rules.
So I slowly took the pill into my mouth and just before swallowing it I was interrupted by a strange floating screen that suddenly appeared in front of me with a peculiar message.
*** Service survey! Please rate the attention received from 1 to 5. ***
"Cool! This will be my first review!" Gil exclaims in surprise before looking at me intensely with stars in his eyes. "Please rate me before you swallow the pill!" He exclaims impatiently. I guess this must be very important to him.
At this, a small evil smile spread across my face as I held the red pill firmly between my teeth.
"I will gladly rate you, but first I need you to clear me of a little existential doubt..." I hum slyly before he quickly interrupts me.
"Ask me whatever you want!" He exclaims quickly, unable to contain the anticipation in his voice.
"Once I swallow this pill... What exactly will happen next?" I ask innocently as Gil quickly raises his hand.
"You will be reborn as an orphan of course!" He exclaims cheerfully before his eyes widen in surprise and he quickly covers his mouth with his hands. "I shouldn't have said that, it's against the rules." He whispers nervously.
An orphan... That certainly has many drawbacks and few advantages. That's so cliché!
"It's a shame... I would really hate to be reincarnated as an orphan." I murmur in disappointment, slowly extending my hand towards the floating screen in front of me. On the screen was a photo of a smiling Gil next to a selection of stars ranging from the lowest score of 1 to the highest of 5.
All this while my finger was getting menacingly close to the lowest score.
"Wait a second! You can't simply choose which family you will be reborn into! That's against the rules! That world would have to be completely recalibrated! This is why the orphan child option is so popular!" Gil exclaims in alarm, instantly materializing the enormous rule book before quickly turning the pages, having no idea what to look for.
I just shrug and continue to move my finger closer and closer to my target with a deadly serious expression on my face.
At this, Gil shudders and quickly throws the rule book aside. "To hell with the rules! I myself will recalibrate that world in secret!" He exclaims desperately. "You will not be reborn as an orphan! I will do my best to place you in a good family! I'll even give you a brother! I promise!" He exclaims quickly, waving his arms to get the point across.
"It's the most I can do without my supervisor getting suspicious." He whispers pitifully, staring at me with his puppy eyes before I nod slightly.
"We have a deal!" I exclaim innocently, quickly moving my finger to the other end of the screen in front of me and selecting the highest score. 5 STARS.
***Thank you for rating honestly***
"HURRAH!" He jumps into the air completely excited, as the floating screen in front of me fades away. "Thank you very much! You will not regret it!" He exclaims with great excitement as his eyes shine brightly with gratitude, completely ignoring the fact that he has just been manipulated by me.
"It's show time." I mutter, finally swallowing the red pill as a crooked smile spreads across my face.
"Thank you for dying, come back soon!"
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Then a green portal materialized right under my feet, making me fall into the infinite void... Where I had no choice but to start counting the minutes, the weeks, and the months...
1... 2...
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Sometimes a child's wish can significantly change the course of history for the better... Too bad I was the wrong child.
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"...Congratulations Mrs. Midoriya... It's a boy."
To Be Continued...
☆ In the next chapter! Chapter 2: Butterfly Effect ☆
