1 Mute-Mike

Before he came my mother and I were never separate we even slept in the same bed at night, we weren't financially stable but we made what we had work. When she left she would always come back, she would make sure I ate before she left and when she returned, she never hit me, never made me bleed, never called me names and never touched me in a way that made me feel inferior as a man, everyday she would tell me she loves me that's when it was just us two, mike and mom. Welcome to the mind of a child physically, mentally and sometimes sexually abused.

I sat in the living room that night when moms boyfriend came to visit, he always comes to visit but something was different that night, he came with bags and soap and more bags. I was a curious child and straight away I got up off the couch and offered to help with the luggage to ease drop on their convocation, " I'm glad you decided to come stay with us" my mom said blushing, " am glad you invited me to come stay with you'' he answered back with a smirk. In that moment I was happy, I knew after my dad died my mom hadn't been the same and didn't ever talk to guys on a flirtatious level, I thought jay might have been good for her, for us, but that thought changed after 5 months of living with him. Mom changed and not for the good when I would come back from school she would be passed out on the couch with a piece of cloth tied tightly on her hand above the forearm area with a little needle stuck in her skin. We never ate on time anymore now we just order take out, later that evening jay was in the kitchen rummaging through the cabinets harshly mumbling profanity then he slammed the cabinets shut and from my room all I heard was " WHERE IS MY ALCOHOL" he shouted furiously, mom was still knocked out cold.

I heard loud footsteps marching their way up to my door and before I could sit up straight on my bed, my room door swung open and in walked jay, " ill give you one minute to answer me, did u, or did you not touch my alcohol" he asked assumingly, I watched him in curiosity remembering he carried it to bed with him the night before and then said "no" and layed back down. " LIAR" he shouted and took 3 steps forward and dragged me by my shirt collar off my bed onto my back and beat the living daylight out of me, literally, I blacked out that night and woke up around the time recess was supposed to start the next day. I went to school without even taking a bath, I rushed to put on my clothes and left, the moment I came through my class door everyone stopped what they were doing and watched me and gasped, teacher dropped the chalk and ran up to me examining me up and down.

" m-mike" she said stuttering. I didn't take a bath but I doubt I looked as bad as she perceived, she grabbed my hand and led me down the hall to the....nurses office? She opened the door and as the nurse turned around she dropped the things that she held in her hand and let out a little squeal, was my shirt stained? Did my pants have a hole in it? I started looking for uniform deformities until they sat me down and handed me a mirror and I witnessed the reason for the pitiful gazes. After that day the beating continued and everyday I went to school the looks were the same, my teacher would carry me to the nurse every single day and have her fix me up for class, she tried to get me to speak cause it was over 2 months I haven't said a word the students called me mute mike and the teachers called me broken. Jay would even sometimes come to my room and touch me in places I knew didn't feel right but from the constant beating I developed a slight brain damage in the speech section of my brain so speaking was nearly impossible. I fell into a depression and soon made up my mind that dying was the only way to live, when jay and mom were out I came back early from school and tied the old dog rope to the ceiling fan, turned on the tv and stood on the table.

I didn't even try to back out of it, I put the rope around my neck and jumped and began to hang, as I was suffocating the tv went to commercial and the last thing I heard was " call the domestic abuse helpline: 0800 027 1234".