51 Looking For Trouble

{Author's Note}

The inspiration flows like a river! Now that I don't have my job at Apple constantly crushing every ounce of inspiration I have, I can write more! In fact, I finished this chapter two days before it would come out on Patreon! Can you believe that!?

Anyway…

Join the Discord: h ttps://disc ord.gg /3CBa zz8C4H

Support me on Patreon to read 3 chapters in advance: https://w ww.patr eon.com/unfor tunateG ambler

Give me a Tip on Ko-Fi: https:/ /ko-fi.com/ unfortun atega mbler

Watch me play games on Twitch: http s://ww w .twitch.tv/fort unateGa mbler

O~N~W~I~T~H~T~H~E~S~T~O~R~Y

~~~

{An Hour Long Walk Later}

The city surrounding Grand Noah Castle bore a strong resemblance to that of San Ilia. From the shops, to the roads, to the guards roaming around, they were nearly identical. The differences, however, were major enough to dispel those thoughts the moment one truly took a look around; the first, and surprisingly less prominent, one being the actual castle in the center instead of a massive cathedral.

What drew more of Kevin and Alice's attention, though, was the fact that the population of the city was evenly split between men, human women, and monsters. Monster girls of all shapes, sizes, and species milled about the crowds, with none of the humans having any negative reactions to them at all. In the travelers' experience, only Port Natalia had this kind of harmony between humans and monsters, but even then it was limited to mermaids.

"To think that they're this familiar with each other," the Monster Lord mused as they walked past a succubus haggling with a street vendor. "I'd heard the stories, but had no idea it went this far."

Kevin nodded. "It IS nice to see that there's at least one place in this world where religious idiots aren't chasing every monster away, and feral monsters aren't raping every random guy they see."

"..." the Spirit on his shoulders nodded in agreement.

"Yeah! According to Deeny, it's been like this for a very long time," Sylph revealed. "Monsters and humans in the Noah Region have always been friendly with each other, and even banded together any time Heroes from the Church of Ilias came around to try pushing the monsters out."

That bit of trivia brought a smile to Alice's face. It was no secret at this point that she envisioned a world where the coexistence currently surrounding them was spread throughout all three continents. It may have only been a relatively small part of the world in the grand scheme of things, but just having proof that it was possible was enough to rekindle some of the dying embers of her desire for unity of all races.

The quartet of travelers quickly came to the conclusion that they should first seek out an Inn and rent a room for the night. It was only approaching noon, but the amount of nonsense that normally popped out of nowhere while they were exploring the last few cities was enough incentive for them to make it a priority.

As usual, various conversations were overheard as they walked by. Most of them were what one might generally expect from such a large city, such as praises, gripes, and rumors.

"Yeah, life around here is nice, but there is one thing I wish I could change. A lot of monsters have weird cultural rituals that can get pretty annoying."

"This city is great! I'm not leaving here until I die! There are always cute, hungry monster girls around."

"My fishing partner has gone missing. He said he was going to the 'Taboo Spring.' I told him not to, but he just wouldn't listen."

"I heard that the village head of Yamatai Village was looking for a skilled adventurer to hire. It seems like a monster has been bothering them for a while."

It was almost routine for them to filter through these random conversations at this point, with most of it being useless. However, what really piqued the group's interest was the OTHER comments that they heard.

"I'm looking forward to the bout tomorrow. I need to get up early to save a seat at the Colosseum,"

"I bought a special box seat for tomorrow's matches. Hehehe…"

"To…to get into the Colosseum…money…need money…AH! I want to fight in the Colosseum!"

If he was both legally blind and deaf in one ear, Kevin may have taken these statements as they were and assumed that the people were just excited to see men and monsters clash in battle. Their perverse expressions and the obvious undertones of lust in their voices, however, made it obvious that 'combat' was one of the least common things to actually happen in the Colosseum. One girl even came up to the Eevee boy and suggested that he participate in the match tomorrow, not even trying to hide her intentions.

"So, we're all in agreement that what's actually going on is obvious to anyone with a functioning set of eyes and ears, right?" he deadpanned.

"People going to the Colosseum to either have sex with a monster, or watch others have sex? Yeah, I noticed," Alice nodded.

Sylph tilted her head to the side in confusion. "But why would people just be okay with having sex in front of hundreds of people like that?"

"..." Gnome silently replied, mentally directing to one of their Host's memories that held the definition of 'exhibitionism.'

"Ooooooh," the tiny Spirit nodded. "That makes a lot more sense."

Avoiding even more attempts from random women to either convince the teenage Pokemon to either participate in the colosseum's matches, or even just have sex with the few monsters that approached, they eventually made it to a relatively cheap Inn.

When Kevin actually offered to pay for the night, Alice was more than a little surprised. Not once since they had started their journey back on the Ilias Continent had he possessed even a single golden coin, leading to her constantly footing the bill for supplies and nights in the inns they stayed at. Now, he suddenly had enough money?

She questioned him the moment they entered their room.

"Oh, that?" he said. "I guess I forgot to ever tell you what those Held Items I got from Lily did."

"To be fair, you weren't in the best state of mind then, or in the following days," Sylph pointed out.

Alice nodded. "I remember wondering what they did, but between the Sylveon transformation, the obvious turmoil you were having leading up to the [True Bonding Ritual] with Gnome, and the aftermath of the ritual in question, I ended up forgetting to ask."

"For now, I'll just give you the cliffnotes," the boy stated. "The Held Items Lily gave me were the [Binding Band], [Red Card], [Toxic Sludge], [Choice Scarf], and [Amulet Coin]. In order, they gave me longer effects on any binding attacks, the ability to select an opponent who is as strong as or weaker than me once per week and make them unable to attack or defend for one hour, heal over time when I'm in my Poison Type form, continue to do more damage every time I consecutively use the same Move, and spontaneously earn money whenever I defeat an enemy.

"As for the money: I earn 500 gold for every regular monster or enemy, 2500 for Queen class opponents, and 10k for anyone stronger than Queen Class. After subtracting the ten gold it costs for a night here, I have 5490 gold currently sitting in my backpack."

She stared at him for a few seconds, momentarily rendered speechless. Every time he talked about his powers, the fact that they operated outside of conventional logic was further cemented in her mind. At this point, she was pretty sure his magic ran on wishful thinking and dream logic.

When she finally regained enough composure to speak to him, she actually smirked. "You know that this means you can't mooch off of me for anything other than food, right?"

Kevin nodded. "I do, but I also know that you only have three favors that you can use to save your idiotic subordinates from my wrath. We both know that you'll eventually run out and have to resort to other bribes again."

As much as the Monster Lord wanted to deny that, she had to admit that he was right. Those favors existed solely to stop her overpowered friend from brutally murdering the most powerful monsters in the world when - not IF, but WHEN - they inevitably did something to piss the boy off enough to make him decide killing them was easier than just sealing them. The Kraken had been understandable, as her kind weren't exactly known for their ability to think clearly at all times, but the Harpy Queen and the Sphinx - both of which were much older than Alice - proved that even the most wise and kind rulers weren't above putting their own lives in danger for stupid reasons.

"Shut up," she finally grumbled.

"Another win for Kevin!" Sylph cheered, zipping around the room excitedly. "And the crowd goes wild!"

"Hah," the boy sighed. "Gnome could you…?"

"..."

SMACK!

"Owie!"

"Thanks," he smiled, reaching down to pick up the downed Spirit. "We gotta go take another look around town."

Alice raised an eyebrow. "What for?"

"We have to look for…her," he groaned.

It took a second for the lamia to realize who she meant. "But…why? After what you did to her in the Sabasa Castle dungeons, do you really think she'll be here?"

"Unfortunately, yes, I do. I know her kind well enough to know that even if I had cut off both of her legs and buried her neck-deep in the middle of the desert, she would still find a way to make it here, looking the same and acting as if nothing had happened."

"Her kind?"

"Plot devices," he spat out, as if the words themselves were poisonous. "They're essentially immortal until they have fulfilled all of the tasks given to them. Great punching bags for stress, but impossible to kill."

'..." Gnome nodded in agreement. Just like how Sylph's pastime had become reading through the Monsterpedia, the Earth Spirit had taken up the hobby of reading through her Host's memories of stories and video games. She knew exactly the type of character he was talking about, and from the memories he had of his conversations with the monster in question, it was obvious that she knew her purpose as well.

"..." Alice stared at them for a second. "While I will admit that you've been right about every narrative trope we've encountered so far, I'm incredibly skeptical that that…THING is as immortal as you describe."

Kevin shrugged. "Alright, then YOU try to kill her." He really wanted to see the look on her face when she either succeeded, only for her victim to appear again at a later time; or failed due to some form of divine intervention. It would be hilarious.

Her competitive spirit was sparked. "Fine. I will, and you will owe me another favor when I succeed. Deal?"

"That seems a bit lopsided. What do I get if you fail?"

"Don't even pretend that the right to hang this over my head isn't enough to make you agree, you irritating fox."

"...fair enough."

With the agreement struck, they headed out once again. This time, instead of just remaining on the streets, they entered various shops as well to stock up on food, water, supplies, and anything that could be considered unique in the city,

Their first stop was the Minotauros Milk shop. It was staffed entirely by minotauros girls, and they sold everything from plain milk, to ice cream in milkshakes, to coffee sweetened by the dairy delight. The teenager wasn't squeamish about buying a few gallons, mostly because the recipe for his Hershey's chocolates specifically stated that minotauros milk was required. If he ever encountered anyone who couldn't procure it, he would be able to supply his own stock.

The Eevee's arachnophobia causes them to avoid the sewing shop the moment he spotted a tarantula girl through the window, so their next destination was the Alraune Florist.

"Welcome to Alraune's Florist Shop! Mister traveler, would you like a flower?" the plant girl behind the counter cheerfully asked as she held out a colorful flower.

Alice took it without hesitation and immediately proceeded to chew on its petals.

"...you're really weird. You know that, right?" Kevin asked as they walked out, the Monster Lord having purchased a few more to snack on as they walked.

"Hello pot, my name is kettle," she shot back with a smirk.

It was sad that he couldn't deny her point.

When they spotted the one church of the city, which was in a state of disrepair and neglect, they couldn't help stopping in to laugh at the poor priest stationed there.

"Oh what a travesty! Such a corruption of public morals in this town! I'm so sorry Ilias!" the old man cried as he kneeled before a statue of the self-proclaimed goddess.

All four of them, even Gnome, chuckled at the sight. It was always nice to see religious idiots suffering, no matter where they were.

Moving on, they headed to the tool shop, whose shopkeeper appeared to be an elf. "Welcome to the Elf Tool Shop! Is there anything I can help you find?"

"Probably not," the Eevee neutrally stated. "We're basically just window shopping at this point. Unless…" he paused for a second. "Have you seen an abomination around here lately? Looks like a backwards lamia?"

From the look of annoyance that suddenly overtook the elf's features, he could already tell what her answer would be. "Yes, I have. That particular troublemaker has been here for a few weeks, constantly cornering people and asking questions. Most of the time they're about the Noah Region in general, but she always ends up saying something that irritates everyone into chasing her away."

Kevin nodded. "Yep, that's definitely her. Any idea where she would be right now?"

"I have no idea what would possess you to seek her out, but she normally hangs out in the back alleys on the edges of the commercial district. You could start there."

He thanked her, before continuing walking deeper into the shop. The sheer variety of products in the tool shops in Iliasburg, San Ilia, and Sabasa Couldn't compare to this one; but, considering they only had to cater to humans while this one had customers from various monster races in addition to the normal humans, it was understandable. The Elf Tool Shop seemed to have everything one could possibly need, even a sleeping bag sized up for a lamia!

As the teenager contemplated whether or not he should show the sleeping bag to Alice, the lamia in question slithered over to him. "I found something that I want," she stated, her expression unexpectedly intense.

"...okay?" he replied, unsure where this was going.

She briefly considered pulling him over to the display, but quickly remembered what he'd said the last time she'd touched him without consent. With how Gnome and Sylph were constantly in direct contact with him, it was sometimes difficult to remember he hated being touched. Instead, she gestured for him to follow her over to shelf that showed her current desire.

It was a row of monster accessories. Hair clips, specially designed jewelry, and all manner of cultural decoration were displayed on the shelves. The one that Alice was pointing to, though, appeared to be a black lace ribbon that, if the description below it was correct, was designed to be worn on the tail of a lamia.

"It looks cute," he commented, picking it up. "I don't know why you of all people would want it, but it's your money, so who am I to judge?"

From the way she frowned, he could assume that that wasn't what she was wanting to hear. "I want you to buy it for me," she declared, knowing well that the passive-aggressive approach would only make this more difficult.

The boy raised an eyebrow. "Annnnnd…why would I do that?"

"Do you need a reason to buy a pretty woman a gift?"

"Yes, I actually do," he deadpanned. "You must have mistaken me for someone who hasn't put up with you for the past two months."

She internally groaned in frustration. As much as she wanted this, she didn't want to call on the favors that she was saving. So, she would be forced to do the one thing that brought her more pain than she could imagine: asking politely.

"Please?" she asked, her tone as steady as she could make it. "You can even think of it as paying me back for all of the supplies I bought for you since we started traveling together."

While he wasn't phased at first, the second half did make him consider it. He wasn't someone who liked owing others, and unlike the food she'd agreed to buy for him, everything from the cooking equipment they used to the yards of rope in her backpack were paid for out of her pockets. Sure, there was still some stuff left over from when they made the king of San Ilia regret giving them what was basically a blank cheque, but all of that had mostly run out by then.

"Fine," he shrugged. "But, with this, we're even on supplies. Deal?"

"Deal!" she smiled happily.

They walked out a few minutes later with the ribbon tied into a bow at the tip of Alice's tail, and her smiling in rare genuine happiness. Kevin had absolutely no idea why she had tried so hard to have him buy it for her, but as long as she wasn't bothering him anymore about it, he was fine.

What neither of them knew was that this simple purchase was an important event that would follow both of them into the future, and serve as the first stepping stone for them becoming closer than either of them could imagine.

~~~

{An hour of walking later}

One thing that the Eevee found entertaining was the looks on people's faces when they saw a girl the same height as him riding around on his shoulders. Sylph was easy for others to write off because she was small enough to ride around on his head without getting in the way, but the child-sized Spirit looked odd in her current position. And yet, despite how many of them obviously looked like they wanted to ask, nobody said anything.

"You know, we would be a lot less eye-catching if you just shrunk down like Sylph," the boy suggested, noticing how uncomfortable the antisocial girl was becoming.

However, despite how much she hated being the center of attention, Gnome was too obstinate to give up on her hard-won spot. "..." she silently conveyed her thoughts on the matter.

As she expected, her mount quickly gave up. "Hey, if you want to stay up there, it's fine with me. You know how much I love the feeling of your thighs on my neck and shoulders. I just wanted to give you a way out of the public eye."

'Gnomy is too stubborn,' Sylph mentally pointed out, giggling out loud. 'You'd have an easier time convincing Ilias to stop wearing white all the time.'

The knowledge that she was right made the Earth Spirit puff out her cheeks and glare at her sister. Unfortunately for her, the tiny Spirit was laying down on their Host's head, so she couldn't retaliate by smacking her without risking hitting him in the process. Instead, she settled for flicking the Wind Spirit, while simultaneously channeling the force of a full slap through her fingers.

As a result, Sylph was knocked off.

"Hey!" she cried out, zipping back up to Gnome's eye level. "What was that for!?"

"..."

"And that means you can flick me like that!?"

"..."

"Keeeviiiiiin!" she burst into fake tears, sinking down to the Eevee's head again. "Gnomy's being mean to meeeeeee!"

"...and? What do you expect me to do about it?" he asked, topping it off with a mental image of him raising an eyebrow at her.

"..." Gnome smirked in victory.

Before the tiny Spirit could continue throwing a fit about how unfair it was for their husband to side with the Earth Spirit, they finally found the alley where their target was hiding. Despite being obscured by the shadows of the buildings around them, the unfortunate lamia was impossible to mistake for anyone else.

"Hehehe…I got some good information for you today," she said, her voice slightly disguised…for some reason.

"We know it's you, Amira," Kevin stated emotionlessly.

Stepping out of the shadows, the backwards lamia struck a pose. "Your piercing gaze saw right through my clever ruse. You truly are my hero!"

"Let's skip the whole 'lovestruck annoyance' spiel and get on with your knowledge of the area," the Eevee urged. "We both know that you don't want a repeat of the Sabasa Dungeons, after all."

"You…are absolutely right," she replied, a bit more subdued now as she remembered the trauma she experienced that day. "However, this time there is a price!"

He looked her dead in the eye. "If you say anything about hugging, kissing, or marrying you, I'm just gonna start punching you."

"No, nothing like that. You see, I was reading the beginning of this chapter when I saw the little…bet you have with your companion. If you want me to tell you what I know, you have to try to convince her not to try killing me."

Ignoring the breaking of the fourth wall, the boy raised an eyebrow. "Why, though? You're pretty much immortal until the narrative you're part of concludes, right?"

She nodded. "Yes, I am, But as you clearly demonstrated the last time we met, while I can't die, I can most CERTAINLY feel pain. The author may not allow me to die, but he won't use divine intervention to stop me from being…punished."

Break the fourth wall one more time and I will guarantee that you get tortured.

'…duly noted,' Amira thought, knowing that her quota for this encounter had been exhausted.

After a bit of contemplation, Kevin nodded. "Okay, I agree."

"Great!" the unfortunate lamia cheered. She knew from his character profile that he always followed through with his promises, so a huge weight was lifted from her shoulders. "With that out of the way, here's what I've gathered from my 'sources.'

"First is something you're already familiar with. Undine live in Undine's Spring, which is also called Taboo Spring by the locals because of all of the people who go missing when they try entering. This is actually because it's also home to Erubetie, the Heavenly Knight of Water, and the last safe haven for slimes in the world. She has a tendency of killing any human that so much as looks at the waters, and absorbs them."

"Huh," Kevin commented. "That's a lot more than I thought you'd tell me."

"Not being in pain is worth a lot more than you give it credit for," Amira replied. "Anyway, the second tidbit is that there is a village where plant and insect monsters live together to the north called Planesect Village. It's not exactly 'harmonious,' considering the fact that they are constantly feeding on each other, but that will be perfect for you to fully unlock your Leafeon form and gain access to the Bug Type form after defeating their leaders."

"Let me guess: one side will spin a story that the other side is at fault, only to turn on me when the other side is defeated?"

"Correct! As expected of my hero," she smiled.

"Don't call me that."

"Next is about Yamatai Village. It's home to many people who worship monsters, but lately a boss-type monster has been demanding regular 'sacrifices.' I won't say much more on the matter, as there's someone there that scares me more than you who would probably prefer to give the exposition needed for you to deal with the situation, and you'll go either way with how much Alice wants to try their food."

"...I hate that you have a point."

"Finally: the upcoming tournament here in Grand Noah. If you can find a way to become a participant, I can guarantee you that defeating the champion at the end will unlock your Fighting Type form. To apply, all you need to do is get a good seat in the Colosseum. Fate will lead you where you're needed."

This…was a lot of very useful information. If she had been anyone else, he might have thanked Amira for giving it all to him practically for free. It almost made him regret what he was about to do…

"Wait…" the backward lamia mumbled, looking at the text above. "What?"

Turning to Alice, who had donned a look of contemplation the moment the little meeting had started, the boy spoke. "Alice."

"Hm?"

"Is there anything I can say to make you reconsider trying to kill Amira?"

"...no."

"Please?"

"No."

"Well, you heard her," he shrugged, turning back to the armless monster. "I tried, and I failed. With that, my end of the deal is completed."

Amira could feel her heart drop into her stomach. It suddenly came to her attention that the promise she asked of him wasn't to actually stop the Monster Lord from trying to kill her, but to TRY. His attempt may have been half-hearted and lacking any actual effort whatsoever, but she couldn't say that he didn't try at all.

Thus, she was screwed.

"...mercy?" the lesser monster begged as Alice approached her.

"No," the Monster Lord replied, looking forward to this more than she really should.

~~~

{Author's Note}

Amira came back, broke the fourth wall again, and is now suffering from Alice's murderous intentions. What more could you want from the end of a chapter?

Just so the lot of you know, I am now making it so that I post new chapters across the board on Mondays and Fridays.

As always, comment on the paragraphs and the chapter itself. Try not to be a dick, memes are appreciated, and correct my grammar so I can fix it for future readers!

See you later!