3 Pilot Episode
One year has passed since Jackson arrived in this world.
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[The Dunphy's]
"Kids, Breakfast!" Claire shouted while opening the fridge.
"Kids!" she groaned as she grabbed the orange juice from the fridge.
"Phil, will you get them?" while playing with his phone, he started walking towards the fridge. "Yeah, just a sec." as he opened the fridge and grabbed a grape, but he forgot to close the door.
"Kids!" Clair was just about to turn around and place the nuts inside the fridge, but she bumped into the fridge door and yelped as she dropped the container of nuts.
"Okay, that is- Kids! Get down here!" yelled Phil as to not anger Claire anymore.
"Why are you guys yelling at us when we're way upstairs? Just text me," Haley said as she walked towards them while staring at her phone.
"All right, that's not going to happen, and, wow!, you're not wearing that outfit." As she took a look at Haley's outfit, she gave Haley her breakfast.
"What's wrong with it?" Haley asked.
"Honey, do you have anything to say to our daughter about her skirt?" she asked Phil while cooking an egg.
"Sorry," he says as he stops playing with his phone and looks at Haley.
"Oh yeah, that looks really cute, sweetheart," he said as he went back to playing with his phone again.
"Thanks dad," Haley said as she walked towards the couch.
"No! It's way too short. People know you're a girl; no need to prove it to them," she said as she placed another plate on the table.
Then Alex came down and walked to the fridge and said, "Luke got his head stuck in the banister again." Claire sighed when he heard that.
"I got it; where's the baby oil?" as Phil went to Luke.
"It's in our bedside tab—I don't know, find it" as Claire hurriedly corrected her words and turned around to place the milk back into the fridge when she bumped into the fridge door again as Alex didn't close the fridge.
"Come on!"
[Commentary]
(Phil and Claire)
(married, 16 years)
While sitting on the couch, Claire said
"I was out of control growing up. There, you know? I said it." Phil chuckled when Claire admitted it.
[Camera zooms in]
"I just don't want my kids to make the same bad mistakes I made. If Haley never wakes up on a beach in Florida, half-naked, I've done my job," she says as she nods her head profoundly.
"Our job," Phil said while looking at Claire.
"Right, I've done our job," while smiling stiffly.
as they both look at the camera.
[End of commentary]
****
(In a Soccer field)
"¡Vamos, Manny! Kick it! Kick it! Don't let him kick it!" Gloria yelled frustratingly.
"Manny, go! ¡A la derecha! ¡A la derecha!"
"No!, no, no!" as she almost kneeled on one knee in frustration. He turned around to look at Jay and said, "He tripped him, Jay. Where's the penalty?" while pointing towards the field.
[whistles blows]
"Gloria, they're 0 and 6, let's take it down a notch," Jay said as he tried to calm Gloria down while she was chilling in a beach chair.
[Commentary]
(Jay and Gloria)
(married, 6 months)
While sitting on their couch with their hands intertwined, Gloria chuckled and said, "We're very different; Jay's from the city. He has Big business."
[camera zooms in]
"And I come from a small village, very poor but very beautiful. It's the number one village in all of Columbia for all the—" she looks at Jay, "what's the word?"
"Murders," Jay answered as they looked back at the camera.
"Yes, the murders," Gloria continued with a smile.
[End of Commentary]
"Manny!, stop him! stop him!, you can do it!" Gloria cheered for Manny, but Manny just dozed off as he stared at a girl riding a bike looking at them. He then waved at the girl. but he didn't notice that the opposing team's player passed by him and scored a goal.
"C'mon, coach, you've got to take that kid out," one mother said as she approached the coach.
When Gloria heard it, she turned around angrily and said, "You wanna take my kid out? How bout I take you out?" while pointing at the mother angrily.
"Honey, honey," Jay said as he tried to stop her.
"Why don't you worry about your son? He spent the first half with his hands in his pants!" as the mother was shocked, mouthed wow, and walked away.
A guy suddenly approaches Gloria and says, "I've wanted to tell her off for the last six weeks." He turns around to look at Gloria while offering his hand and says, "I'm Josh, Ryan's dad."
Gloria shakes his hand and says, "Hi, I'm Gloria Pritchett, Manny's mother." Then Josh points at Jay and says, "Oh, and this must be your dad."
"Her dad? Yeah, no, that's funny; actually, no, I'm her husband. Don't be fooled by the uh-" as he struggles to get up from the chair, "give me a second here."
****
(Airport, inside the Plane)
"Who's the good girl? Who's that?" Mitchell asked as he talked to the baby he was holding.
"Oh, she's adorable," the old lady beside him said, making baby noises to attempt to make the baby laugh.
"Oh, thank you; we just, uh, adopted her from Vietnam and were bringing her home for the first time."
"She's an angel; you and your wife must be thrilled," an old guy near him said.
"Sorry, sorry, sorry, daddy needed snacks," Cam said as he walked towards the seat beside Mitchell and said hi to the old guy beside him.
"So, what are we talking about?" he asks as he sees Mitchell looking at the old lady and people around them.
[Commentary]
(Mitchell and Cam)
(together for 5 years)
[zoomed in to Mitchell's face]
"Uh, we have been together for, guh, five years now?" he says as he turns around to look at Cam, unsure.
[The camera zoomed out to see both of them.]
"And, uh, we just decided we really wanted to have a baby. So we had initially asked one of our lesbian friends to be a surrogate, but-" then suddenly Cam interrupted him and said
"Then we figured, they're already mean enough. Can you imagine one of 'em pregnant? No thank you, ick." as Cam shakes his head and Mitchell agrees about what he said.
[End of commentary]
"You saw that right? everybody fawning over Lily and then you walk on and suddenly it's all, "ooh, Sky Mall, I gotta buy a motorized tie rack." Then he gives the baby to Cam and says,
"You know what I'm going to say," but then Cam quickly looked around and whispered to Mitchell, "You are not giving the speech."
"You're going to be stuck with these people for the next five hours," he whispered to Mitchell.
"You're right, you're right. Okay, I'm sorry." Then a couple suddenly walks past them and says, "Look at that baby with those cream puffs." Mitchell has enough and stands up.
"Okay, excuse me, but this baby would have grown up in a crowded orphanage if it wasn't for us "cream puffs," as the people inside the plain all started to stare at him.
"And you know what? A note to all of you who judge!" as Cam tried to stop him, "Mitchell!"
"Hear this, love knows no race or creed," as Cam continues to call him out, "Mitchell!"
"Or gender, and shame on you, you small-minded, ignorant few-"
"Mitchell!"
"What?" as Cam finally manages to get his attention.
Cam whispered, "She's holding the cream puffs," as he showed Lily holding a cream puff.
"Oh," and Mitchell realized what he did as he looked around the people with an embarrassed face. Then he took a seat, and Cam stood up and said, "We would like to pay for everyone's headsets" with an apologetic face.
****
[the Dunphy's]
"Buddy, why do you keep getting stuck like this?" as Phil rubbed baby oil on Luke's head.
"I thought I could get out this time," Luke answered. Then Alex walked down the stairs and said, "I'm just going to say it. He needs to be checked by a specialist," and she walked away.
"Ow," Luke muttered as his head slowly slipped out of the banister.
"There, Excalibur, be free," he says, then laughs at his own joke. then Haley approached them and said, "I'm having a friend over today," but Claire heard it, "Who?'
"Uh, you don't know him," Haley answered, and then she walked upstairs, but when Claire heard what she said, she clarified, "Him? Him?"
then Luke started talking, "Oohh, a boy, you're going to kiss him?" then Haley got annoyed, "Shut up," then Phil tried to intervene.
"Easy, easy," but then it got more chaotic when Alex joined in, "Yeah, shut up," and Luke answered back, "No, you shut up." Then it all quieted down when Claire talked.
"Luke, Alex, why don't you take it outside, okay?"
"And do what?" Alex asked with confusion. Then Phil answered Alex's question.
"Fight in the sun; it will be a nice change," and then laughs about it, "I'm kidding."
Just when Haley was about to go upstairs, "Haley," Haley turned around to her mom, "who's the boy?" Claire asked.
"His name is Dylan; ugh, you know what, I might as well tell him not to come. Because you guys are just going to embarrass me again," Haley said with clear frustration as she went upstairs. But Claire stopped her.
"Sweetie, hang on a second. You're 15, and it's the first time you've had a boy over. I mean, I'm bound to be a little surprised, but I'm not going to embarrass you," Claire said with assurance, and then Phil walked and said
"I better charge the camcorder," Haley groans in embarrassment. "I'm kidding, c'mon, who are you talking to?" as Phil tries to assure Haley it was only a joke.
[Commentary]
(Phil)
"I'm the cool dad, that's my thing. I'm hip." as he picks up his phone and points at it. "I surf the web, I text, L-O-L: laugh out loud, O-M-G: Oh my god, W-T-F: why the face?" as Phil said it with a proud face.
"Um, you know, I know all the dances to the high school musical, so-"
[flashback]
♪We're all in this together♪
as Phil danced and sang together with a recording.
♪Yes, we are, we were all stars♪
"C'mon, you guys know this," as the three just groaned in embarrassment at what their dad was doing.
[End of commentary]
"Oh wait, I almost forgot" as Alex came back inside the house.
"I'm having someone over too," which shocked Claire, Phil, and Haley, who heard what she said.
"WHAT!?" the three of them shouted together.
[to be continued]
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[1885 words]
A/N: It has finally begun. I know some of you guys will probably question me about why I have to write down everything that happened in the pilot episode. Well, it's because The Pilot episode is where all the Family members are introduced, and skipping it might confuse some readers who will probably read this and have yet to watch the show.
I hope you enjoy the chapter. Don't forget to drop your power stones.
