15 OPM #2 Against will

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Hmph.

"I expected more from my opponent but I guess my hopes were too high."

I stare menacingly down at my opponent.

This game has become too easy. Everyone in this new street brawlers game play like tar tars. They either spam the same attack or bait sweeps by walking back and forth, my devised tactics easily overtake them. This must be Kings true power kicking on instinctively.

Though a creep, perv, and weakling I can admire his gaming ability.

Now that I haven't shaved in awhile the whole beard thing is a plus aswell, it hides my ugly chin and makes me more menacing.

I remember how Kings aura was listed as his only skill in the wikis.

He also has equally infinite bad and good luck.

Im wondering if King, like Saitama, broke a limiter but he just got extremely unlucky with what he broke.

No need to dwell, his body will be returned to him after im done, I will make sure to hook him up though.

I hesitantly open the mini fridge in the corner of Kings room, to my displeasure it is nearly empty wich means I will have to make a grocery run today. Getting groceries is one of my least favorite activities because 1 billion people ask me for my autograph, and I have to either shun or ignore them. Its crazy how this world is so technically advanced but they dont even have door dash. Kek.

Atleast bootleg google was made.

I walk down the street steadily, making sure my wallet is in my pocket, growing out my beard helped a bit with hiding my identity but after it spread online I've been reduced to wearing an obnoxious mask and when anybody asks me what its for I simply reply.

"Monke pox."

So by this point most people in my area call me the weird conspiracy theorist guy, its better than 1000 ugly women wanting their panties signed, I will never forget the salmon smell.

"Hey loser."

A childish voice calls out to me from an alleyway, I go to confront this person but they quickly rush out and hold a knife to my stomach. Here we go again, another idiot. Gotta be the 7th time this week.

"Empty your wallet right now freakshow!"

The hockey masked individual taps the knife against me hesitantly, im guessing its yet another young kid trying to grab some cash for booze and pizza.

Foolish.

"If you dont leave I will kill you."

I reply sternly to his request.

He seems taken aback and I can feel thr vibrations of his shaky hands growing larger.

"Co-come on bro, gimme your money, I will make this ugly!"

*THWAP*

I channel a little Qi into a strike and backhand the fucker in the head, sending him toppling over.

I kneel over him and inspect his pockets for anything to steal, yes im that petty.

Ooh, a pen.

I proceed to draw phallic objects on his arms and write "im a loser" onto his hockey mask, this is what happens when you get in between a man and his instant noodles.

I enter the small store and begin browsing the aisles, I place some instant noodles and energy drinks into my little basket. I quickly check out and hand the clerk the cash.

I walk out of the store quickly and take a straight shot home, I would rather not encounter another tard.

"IT IS I THE LOBSTER KING, HUMANITY WILL WITHER AWAY FOR BOILING MY BRETHREN!"

Oh my god.

Please just let me have a normal day.

JUST ONE GODAMN DAY!!!

A lobster with large buff man legs jumps down from a building and bisects a security guard on a mobility scooter, people scream and run in terror.

I peel my mask off and activate King aura.

"Hey stirfry, im going to kill you."

I point towards the monster and mock him.

"Uegh? Its you! The S class they call the strongest human! Fuck my luck. I wont die without a fight!"

I should be the one cursing my luck, I wanted to finish harem adventurer 3: Monster girls today.

I pour my Qi out and charge the lober.

He goes to block with his meaty hands as I anticipated.

My fist connects and pain shoots through my forearm.

His shell was tougher than anticipated.

He dashes back and charges at me whilst snapping his claws.

I jump forward and grab onto the lobster head.

I dig my fingers in and start headbutting the bastard.

"Ah! Just kill my already!"

The seafood begs for mercy, I let go and dash off the top of his head, using this momentum to get some air I bring down an axe kick and crush his crustacean brains in.

Now I got shit grease all over me.

"Oi, that was dope."

Eh?

That voice sounds extremely familiar but I cant seem to put my fing-

Hory shit.

A bald man in a Hawaiian shirt and khaki shorts aproaches me nonchalantly.

Its him. Its the guy.

"Your that King dude."

Saitama points at me, while snot dribbles from his nose.

"Ye that's me."

"Oh cool."

"yep"

*Awkward silence*

"I was just getting groceries citizen, I'll be on my way now."

I quickly reply, I need to get the hell away from this nuclear bomb.

As I speed walk away a jet stream passes me.

"Master, why did you leave without me!"

A cyborg looking dude floats downwards towards Saitama, oh sheet dubble trubble, im out of here before some plot happens.

"Oi Genos, I just saw King go wild on a monster."

"Where'd he go master!?!?!"

Saitama cryptically turns his head to me as I jog away.

He slowly brings his finger up, pointing to me.

"He's right there."

Genos locks eyes with me the split second I turn my head to look back.

"Is he on patrol master?"

"Nah, he's getting groceries."

Genos looks quizzically.

"Master, I must analyze what the strongest human is eating so we can become more powerful!"

Please no, go away, shoo.

*Nyoooom*

Genos thrusts right infront of me in milliseconds.

He analyzes my grocery bags, his eyes go wide.

"These- are the same things master eats, cheap noodles and off brand energy drinks."

"Leave me alone robot boy."

I sternly pass around Genos, I would push him out of the way if I was strong enough.

After I turn the corner I burst into a full blown sprint to my apartment. After 2 minutes I make it.

Finally, I can relax.

I distribute my groceries into my fridge and sit down, loading my save of Harem Adventurers 3.

Ah, to be a man with a loving slime girl with acidic flesh.

I continue my playthrough for a few hours, when my eyes begin to strain for sleep I turn off the console. I do my stretches and push ups as usual.

I lay down in my blue pajamas and turn off the headlamp next to my bed.

*tap*

What is that god forsaken noise.

I cant even sleep for 30 minutes.

I turn on my lamp and stand up. I search for the source of the noise.

*tap*

Its the window. Its got to be a racoon right? Do raccoons exist in this world?

I open my curtains, fear jumps through my body and I instinctively jolt backwards when a pair of glowing yellow irises enter my vision.

"Master, I have confirmed where King lives."

What the fuck is this perv doing.

"GET OFF MY WINDOW!"

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