Chapter:1- The Grand Confusion.

{As for my previous works. the 1st book series, "Mint And Martin" I left some unfinished business which I haven't deal with. actually, the book was still running, but, the reason behind my leaving that was my mistake, I know I have to finish that book first but... I apologize for that.

I can't tell the reason behind creating a new account. but, I hope you can forgive me for that.

This instalment follows after the scene from that where Martin asked for help from Mint.

did you remember? ya pretty sure some of you do. but for some reason someone of you don't, you don't need to take tension. you can still able to understand what I am interpreting in Thai work. I will make this story flow smoothly, If I am somehow unable to do that I'll at least make the story for you to read comfortable and also that you don't have to pull your hairs off your head. but somehow, if things didn't go as I planned and you weren't able to understand things in here. I highly recommend you to go to the first part of this book, you just need to type the name "Mint And Martin" on the search bar of the app and you can see the first book. so please check that out.}

So, now,

where am I?

ya,

Martin has asked for a favour from Mint. if I say this in another form, it's mean "help". this was for an approach from Martin to Eric. it came as a shock for Mint that Martin wants to hit on Eric. it was quite difficult for Mint. his live interest is waving his heart to someone else. if you put yourself in Mint position. I think you can indeed understand his feelings. if you ever fall in love with someone, you know how it feels like. the butterflies inside of your stomach, that dream of yours spending time with your crush, that inner warmth feeling which giggles to makes you happy, becoming breathless every time you see the person, flashbacks of memories came suddenly into your mind time to time that makes you blush every time, pretty smiles while having your special one around you.

Yea, I was talking about that feeling.

such a precious one.😊

If things go smoothly you can have a wonderful time together. but, if it becomes a little bit tighter or if it just being one-sided love and the other was not interested in you it would be meaningless to hold hope. likewise, our main character was suffering. holding his hope that someday he might able to speak his inner voice and express his feelings to Martin. but as the situation seems now,

it was difficult to bear the fact that, the person he likes, like someone else instead of Mint and Mint, now understand, he now has no chance of winning him. literally like nill. but as for the sake of friendship, when Mint was asked for help by Martin, he was willing to help.

he has to full fill his duty as a good friend. but it comes at a cost, stabbing himself in his own heart. it is more painful to take a knife by self in the heart rather than when given by others. cause you have controls over yourself. in the case of others, betrayal or disappointment is unpredictable. ya, I know, how it feels, sometimes I do that to myself too, hurting willingly.

(Mint POV)

When you love someone, you are willing to do anything to make that person happy. even though you have to be the one who got hurt instead. here in my case, I unwillingly utter that I will help, but now it originates some of the difficulties for me. win some unanswered topic how?

why I have to do this?

and

and now what should I do?

seeing my so-called crush seeking a guy who is not me. It's freaking hurt. but my reason for helping Is just because of him and I being friends

I was not sure of my feelings for him. and also I don't know what he feels about me. as per I noticed I never show any sign of having something for Martin and neither I have noticed his actions towards me.

ah! Damm!

I'm so confused. I need someone to recite some words to me quick. I was thinking, whom should I ask for help? Eric was the perfect guy. but as I can discover he is the crush of Martin. I am now not able to pursue help from him, it feels weird. ok! then only one person left for the discussion, I.e Jasmine. but wait, is she the perfect one to discuss this topic, it's regarding one heart❤️ and feelings, not just that she has gone through a treble breakup too. is asking this question hurt her feelings?

ah!

am I able to conquer this situation. can I handle my confused heart?

you might be asking me that too right?

I was asking the same question as you do.

can I manage to help my crush after chasing someone else rather them me? I guess not, or maybe. in this type of situation, most of people either avoid or say a direct no. but, in my case, before Martin is my crush, he is a friend. I'm loyal to a friend. even if it's hurt I'm happy to help them. as for this situation, if I can see Martin happy with someone else I rather not complain about having a sad ending for myself, cause, I already let you know all the issue related to it.

but still, I'll cast the issue myself.

1. I am still afraid of being cast out because of my sexuality.

2. I am afraid that my parents and loved ones will be disappointed with me.

3. Afraid of being alone and no one beside me after cast out/ coming out to the public.

4. Misjudge and mistreated by the people.

and most of all

5. I can be the cause of trouble and bring shame to my family and friends especially my mom for being who I am.

these reasons are binding me back.

so, as I have told you this much, I rather forget and should let go of hoping for a happy ending. if I do I might be the cause of much more chaos to others.

this is the beginning of my ending. which has just started, unfortunately, my love train for this route is going to have its last station. after I leave the train, I might consider finding a new train or changing my vehicle. because it's meaningless to hold on hope to a train that has come to it's last station. it will not let you to your perfect station. so its better to leave that train and ride on another one. finding a new train might let you go to your destined destination. I hope so, if its not Martin then either I should leave hope on love and do my studies or I should just go for a search for someone new. both of the two options were correct. if I can find someone then its good, or if someone finds me that's good too😊.

I leave my this topic here and I should come to the main topic. now.

it was all started on the day when the flowers blooming in full glory and breeze was chilled and the sun was shining out at straight of my head that even my shadow gets to hide. (not actually hide, in a place like Thailand the shadow can't hide beneath feet. the equator is below the country. it's just an expression from me that hides my inner emotions which were in the form of my shadow.) I asked Eric to come to the university early today for some purpose regarding to study materials. but I lied to him that I need to talk to him about study. Martin asked me to guide him. the plan was that Martin meets Eric by coincident. sure he has to impose him before he can opens his feeling towards Eric. and it will take time, like a lot. it was the first time Martin was going to talk to Eric other than the study basis topics. I was wondering what he was going to say? I was waiting for them near my bench. after. awhile Martin came and asked me about his looks and his stunning personality. I must admit he has no flaws, his looks being hyper cute is a good thing in its way, but wait a minute why is he wearing short cream pink jeans with a white half-shirt and white tennis shoes. that look completely change his personality. somehow someone looks at him for the first time they might think that he is an innocent cute fragile boy who does not do mischievous things at all but the reality I know that's just the opposite.

when they meet at the campus I was watching them from afar. looking at them somehow make me feels weird. weird enough, and might be a little hurt too.

"why am I feels like a supporting character of a k-drama?"

if it's a K-drama,

I might rather end as the second male lead character in the K-drama series. ah! such a pain in the ass* you know right 2nd male lead never gets the girl. and the worst-case scenario somehow that character designing is based on helping the leads to get together. the demand for the 2nd male lead is just that much. even he felt hurt he was unable to do anything at all. ah, my pain!