CHAPTER 3

#3: Sunflower

Dear Diary,

Do you love? If you ask me, if I love you, well I do. I have always loved you and I take care of you but I'm sorry but I love Graciano more. Do you know, maybe not yet because I will just tell you. The two of us went for a walk yesterday, the day of the town festival. Do you know? He bought me a dress, clogs and lipstick. Do you know what is most embarrassing? He touched my foot, really embarrassing.

Shytype, Hermosa

I was happy to return to our mansion accompanied by our driver, whom I love Graciano, last night. The smile never left my lips. I am really obsessed with him. Aside from his handsome man, he is elegant, hardworking, gentlemanly. He is almost perfect.

But I will not confess to him, no matter what happens. It doesn't look good if the young lady confesses to a gentleman, does it? It is really embarrassing. I know I told you that I am not like Maria Clara, but I am still ashamed of myself I just said I am just brave.

I woke up early because I am going in the convent now. I do not intend to be a nun but I do intend to serve God. Also, women are rarely able to study so I am lucky enough to get in. I can see the grace bestowed on me.

I was about to go down but I saw the lipstick Graciano bought me yesterday. It's embarrassing but I tried it. I blushed my lip and smiled in the mirror.

"Nice!" I said smiling. Nice lip gloss, not my lip. I fixed my curly hair and I put a clip on my hair from Europe.

I went downstairs and found my whole family there. I smiled but also immediately disappeared when I noticed that they did not look good, especially Father. I looked at who he was looking at and he was looking at Leonardo.

"G-good morning, Father!" I greeted even though I know there is nothing good in the morning. Father's face was even more sour. What could be Leonardo's fault? After all, my older brother was stubborn but he was not as bad as Gabrielo.

"You didn't even thought of our family!" Father shouted at Leonardo. "What do you think is the content of your work! You are supposed to be a Spaniard and that is what you are painting? What can our governor-general tell us! Your brother, Gabrielo, is a general, then your painting is...!" Father took a jar and broke it.

The expensive jar that Mother even bought in Italy was no doubt broken by Father just because he was angry with Leonardo. What is the problem with his work? What he painted was amazing and impressive.

WelI also realize that something is wrong with it. That is because the content of his work is the torture of the Filipino by the civil guards. The Spanish conquest of the Filipinos.

"Father, that's enough!" I stopped them. I approached Leonardo and helped him to stand because he had knelt before Father earlier. "I think you are doing this to him too much. If you really don't like his work, you should not have commented!"

I pulled Leonardo on his wrist until we got out of the mansion. "Hermosa, what are you doing, you could be damned! Father might be mad to you too."

I smiled at him. "If he'll be angry, then finet! If I'll get hurt, then fine. I don't want him to embarrass you in front of me, what. You are my favorite brother." I tapped him on the shoulder. He laughed.

"That's what I want from you. You idolized your older brother so much!" He said and messed up my hair. I tapped his hand because I fixed it now and then he just messed up?

"Tss. My hair! Well, the right thing to do is to come with me to the convent. Help Madame Rosario, you are a burden to this town!" I insulted my favorite brother.

"That's Hermosa, she doesn't want to oppress his favorite brother, but he oppresses me!" He complained then shook his head. "You young lady, I'm older than you, huh? Don't forget." He reminded me and we both laughed at the same time.

We headed straight for the chariot and Graciano is our driver. "Good Morning, Señor and Señorita." He greeted us then put his hat on his chest.

"Good morning to you too, Siyanong, take us to the convent." My older brother got in the chariot before me. My older brother is really good. Isn't he a gentleman? Amazing! I shouldn't help him earlier!

I narrowed my eyes at him and was about to climb into our chariot but Graciano's hand supported me, he still smiled at me. I accepted his hand even though I'm already embarrassed.

What did my older brother say earlier? Siyanong? How long have they been close to each other? Even when I was a child I did not call him by his nickname, then my older brother called him by his nickname! I felt... envy.

-

Our class is about to end because it is four o'clock in the afternoon. The young ladies here here seems to enjoy Brother Leonard's presence. Apart from being the son of the gobernadorcillo and being a nice man, my older brother is also a star here. He pays attention to the women here. I wish I hadn't included him here.

"Hermosa, you did not tell that you will bring your older brother Leonardo here, I hope I did make ups" Nara said shyly. She put her hair behind his ear, she is shy type.

I didn't mean to laugh sarcastically but I did. I covered my mouth with my fan. I laugh at the fact that even if she used make ups, my older brother still will not like him. He does not like women younger than him. I tapped Nara on her shoulder and smiled at her.

"That's okay, he still won't like you even if you used make ups." I told her and winked at her. Her eyes become wider and her lips parted. She rolled her eyes. "Oh you rolled your eyes? I am his favorite sibling, don't you know?"

She just left me because maybe she disliked what I said. I only said the truth because my older brother would not really like her. In fact, she should just thank me because I saved her from my older brother who did not care about the young ladies.

I did not realize that my older brother had approached me. He was sweating profusely because he also helped the church clean things up. He entertains the people by his kind heart and being ready to help. He wiped himself first before speaking to me.

"You go home first because I have an important meeting." He said and pat my shoulder once. I just scratched my neck and stared at him.

"If they ask me where you are" I raised an eyebrow at him. This older brother of mine is doing too much pretending, I will do nothing but I am sure of his laziness. He can only sleep by the river Ligaya, or maybe in the gardens, or he will go to his friends and have a drink.

"They will not look for me in you because Father is angry with me right now, right?" I thought about what he said. He has a point but I still think it is bad that I went home immediately because I defended him earlier. Father would surely hate me. I was just shaken by my own thoughts.

"Graciano, let's not go home first." I told him seriously. Not that I was afraid to go home to our mansion, but it seemed so. Why did I defend that Leonardong earlier, look at me now and I will go home alone.

"Señora Carolina will be worried, Señorita. She knows it's time to go home." I smiled at what he said. Who is this gentleman to tell me what to do. In his speech it was obvious he did not want me to take a walk first.

"I don't want to go home yet, do you have a problem there?" I raised an eyebrow at him. I suddenly remembered that I owed him something so I lowered my eyebrow. "H-how much did you spend on me yesterday?"

He smiled at me and waved his hand as if to say no. "Oh c'mon, Señorita. It's just a small thing! You don't have to pay it! It's my treat.

I do not understand how I feel. I rarely receive a gift from another person because I am the one who usually gives. This is how the giver feels. So if you give something to me, even if it is a small thing, I will take care of it.

I smiled at him but it was just quick. I realized I should not accept things from other people, my father would surely be angry. He will say that we should give to the poor and we should not accept gifts from poor.

"Just tell me how much you spent to pay you well." I said softly to him. This is what you should say, Hermosa, your family does not accept gifts. "Or if you want, I will double it."

The smile disappeared from his lips. "I thought we are friends. Friends give so you should accept my treats I-if you don't want it, just throw it away."

We are now quietly traveling in our chariot. None of us dare to talk after our scene before. I wonder if what I said earlier hurts him to feel that way? I didn't say anything bad, did I? I have not counted how many times I have rolled my eyes.

"Where do you want to go, Señorita?" His tone was serious. Wait, is that serious or angry? Why is he angry with me? Is he lazy about his job? He can leave and look for another job. Yes I love him but I hate him.

"Everywhere the horse takes, I'm fine." I acted and I fanned the fan. Does he want me to just throw away the things we bought yesterday, I hope he doesn't just buy me, It's fine with me. I didn't force him to buy such that things.

I was surprised when we stopped at a place I was unfamiliar with. Just now I got here and a lot of kids playing outside, I kept remembering my youth.

"What are we doing here?" I asked Graciano who is still getting off the horse and turned around at the bottom of the chariot to support me.

"The horse brought us here, Señorita." Now, he smiled at me. My weak heart fell on him again and all my thoughts that were bad on just erased.

I took my hand and got out of the chariot. The children looked at me and at our chariot. They were amazed at the beauty of our chariot.

"We live here, Señorita. Welcome to our baragay!" He said cheerfully. I did not know that they were here to live. It was far from our mansion so I was thinking now how they got to our mansion. After all, our family is well-known because the Solidad family, who has always been the leader of the town of San Jose since then, is no longer surprising.

"Stay at our house first, Señorita!" He then said he pointed the little hut. Wait, is this just home or room? I wanted to ask but I was afraid of the possibility that he would hate it.

"Who is living here, Graciano?" I asked him. I was embarrassed to enter because of my attire. Not because I might get dirty, it's because my clothes are too fancy and doesn't belong here.

"My grandfather Romeo, and my two brothers." He said cheerfully. He entered me first, maybe so that I would not be ashamed and he would help me to enter them. He supported me with his hand, I accepted.

"Brother Siyanong, what are you doing here? Do you still have a job?" Angela asked, I remembered her. She is Graciano's sister. "Señorita Hermosa? What are you doing here?"

"I brought her here, Angela, do you have a problem there?" His older brother asked him a serious question. "Where is Pamela?" He went to the table and he looked at what was on the plate there. I saw that there's nothing on it.

"He accompanied Grandpa to Mang Dencio, you have nothing to eat here!" She said calmly to us. I frowned at her, does she have a problem with me? If there is, she can die now. Just kidding.

"You have a point. There is nothing in this house." He said as he looked at his sister holding his waist. "We'll go home later and make sure you've done all the housework, huh?"

"By the way, brother Siyanong, Tatiana is looking for you. Why don't you visit her? She is upset with you." Angela chased after her brother.

What? Is there a young lady looking for Graciano? Who is she and does she think she has right to fall in love with my beloved? "

Please don't let her bother me." Graciano said and then he grabbed my wrist and we left their home. Hah! I'm still not sure who that Tatiana is but I'm sure my loved one doesn't like her.

-

We are now heading to the town where there are many eateries and we are now heading to a panciteria here. There are a lot of people here the reason why our order is not yet delivered.

Graciano smiled at me. "Are you bored, Señorita? I'm sorry the pancit is really delicious here so many people are eating here. I hope you can wait a little longer, at least for a while."

I smiled at him and then shook my head. "I know how to wait, don't worry, Mr. Graciano." In fact, even you I am willing to wait for when you will like me.

I wish you could say, but I just can't. Our chosen meal has also arrived and he has a point. The pancit canton was delicious and tasty so I smiled.

I no longer thought of my long, curly, and black hair as we were eating so it ended up being what I was eating. He put it behind my ear causing me to stop. His hand, touched my face! I could not help but blush. I just smiled at him to get rid of the embarrassment.

[PAGTINGIN BY: BEN & BEN]

[Dami pang gustong sabihin

Ngunit 'wag na lang muna

Hintayin na lang ang hanging

Tangayin ang salita]

Now we went to our garden, behind our mansion. I did not want to go home because I was afraid of Father. I hope he forgets what I did. In fact, he is the one who is at fault. Yes, no one else but him. If he hadn't embarrassed my brother in front of me, I wouldn't have defended Leonardo. Am I right? I should not be afraid.

['Wag mo akong sisihin

Mahirap ang tumaya

Dagat ay sisisirin

Kahit walang mapala]

As we now walk in our gardens, Graciano is quiet! I am confused with his attitude? Sometimes noisy, sometimes quiet. Why did I like this man again?

['Pag nilahad ang damdamin

Sana 'di magbago ang pagtingin

Aminin ang mga lihim

Sana 'di magbago ang pagtingin]

There is nothing certain about me but I know I love him. Ever since he also entered our mansion as a worker his treatment of me has changed.

[Bakit laging ganito?

Kailangang magka-ilangan

Ako ay nalilito]

His formality to me I did not like. I prefer him to call me by my name as usual. As for me, I want to call him by his nickname.

['Wag mo akong sisihin

Mahirap ang tumaya

Dagat ay sisisirin

Kahit walang mapala]

He picked a sunflower from our garden. He smiled at me before speaking. "Oh, Señorita, I will pay for it. I just want to give it to a very beautiful young lady."

['Pag nilahad ang damdamin

Sana 'di magbago ang pagtingin

Aminin ang mga lihim

Sana 'di magbago ang pagtingin]

To whom does he want to offer that? Maybe to the woman he loves. Is that your Tatiana? I was just pissed. "To whom do you want to offer that?" I am for the curious in my question. You are embarrassing, Hermosa, I hope you have not just asked.

[Pahiwatig

Sana 'di magbago ang pagtingin

Pahiwatig

Sana 'di magbago ang pagtingin]

He took my hand again which surprised me. This gentleman was sometimes gentlemanly, often aggressive. Isn't it forbidden for a young lady and a gentleman to hold hands?

[Iibig lang kapag handa na

Hindi na lang, kung trip trip lang naman

Iibig lang kapag handa na

Hindi na lang, kung trip trip lang naman]

['Pag nilahad ang damdamin

Sana 'di magbago ang pagtingin

Aminin ang mga lihim

Sana 'di magbago ang pagtingin]

[Subukan ang manalangin

Sana 'di magbago ang pagtingin

Baka bukas, ika'y akin

Sana 'di magbago ang pagtingin]

[Pahiwatig

Sana 'di magbago ang pagtingin

Pahiwatig

Sana 'di magbago ang pagtingin]

"It's for you, my dear Hermosa."

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