Chapter 2 : Getting answers from the One Above All

"Where i am ? I was drinking my morning coffee, birds were flying unbothered and then i heard yelling and noises. My mind couldn't register what it was seeing, it was seeing red, all i could see was red. I couldn't feel my lower body anymore. Red, just red, everything else felt unimportant.

My brain slowly understood, i was looking at blood, i was covered by my own blood.

Huh, this is my end. I was wishing for something more peaceful. Well that isn't my problem anymore. Then i realized, how am i still thinking, how do i still exist. Isn't death the end of the road ?"

{No William, it never was, death and birth are intertwined, death is always lead to a rebirth}

I had no words at the voice that was full of warmth, i was blind but i didn't feel fear. It was weird, is this how it feels to talk to a God. God exist, you fool thinking you had things figured out better than other people, that you had more depth that others, still overlooking the biggest thing of all creation : God's existence.

"I wasn't sure you existed, i am truly sorry. I failed to realize your existence, i will accept any punishment for my sins."

God chuckled, {It is alright, there are many people that shouts to every one around them about my existence but still commits wrongdoings, feeling that believing in me is enough to wash them for their sins. I rather have people who don't believe, but are kind to everyone around them.}

"But i am a mere human, my personality is flawed and full of short-comings, i wasn't always kind, i was selfish. I isolated myself from my family, I ignored 90% of the time the homeless in the streets. i didn't donate to any kind of charity.

How am i better than them ?"

{William Jones, born from Richard and Sandra Jones, you were kind but also misguided. I will tell you what you need to hear. You were kind but also afraid, afraid of failing. The thing is you were never caged nor by your family. You blamed your family for a lot of things that wasn't their responsability.

Love is not a prison. It can be liberating. It all depends on you. The life of a man, is what he makes it to be. You can't escape pain, happiness, love and grief. The lessons that you learn, the pleasure from the little things and the desire to be the best version of yourself are what can make one's life great}

{Did you forget what you did in Casablanca, or your days in Dakar, even your vacation in Hanoi ? The people you helped, you were not obligated to. You did it because you wanted to. You were free to ignore them but you did it anyway.

I am mesmerized by the paradox of humanity, you whose desire for freedom which was unmatched in the history of mankind although you weren't a slave, you didn't live in a country ruled by a tyrant. Still, no one desired freedom more than you. You freed yourself from anything that could hinder it.

That was your mistake, your parents, your siblings and Olivia, none of these people were trying to hinder your freedom. They all loved you, they didn't express it in the best ways possible but they were human too.

Being selfish is good sometimes, you can't let your life being stirred away by everyone but sacrifing a bit of your freedom to help others can be liberating in its own.

"Can I ... Can i look back at my memories ? I want to see it from a different perspective. Please."

{Of course, my child.}

William found that he had a human form and he could move again. He was sitting in a cinema with God by his side, he looked like a middle aged man with a beard but his eyes were golden. He reminded him of a lion.

He watched his life from another perspective, from his childhood to his death. Every person that came and left his life. His favorite moments and his worst. It felt like the highlights of football match. At the end of it, he had a tear.

"I see, i wasn't a complete idiot but god i made stupid choices sometimes. Mom and dad weren't that bad nor was Oli."

{Do you want to see what you life could have been ?}

"No it is enough, the choices i made although not perfect, they were my own and that is enough. I did enough, i am .. enough"

{Mmmh attaboy..}

William wiped his tears, and then look at God.

"So what now ?"

{Your desire from freedom drew me in, for picking my attention and my curiosity, i want to give you a new life in another universe, one where your desire for freedom can materialize in more obvious ways than your own.}

William laughed "Hahahahaha, wow a new life huh ?"

"Well, where do i sign ?"