Prologue: The day I told God off

Tokyo, Japan

23 September 2013 AD​

Everything had gone smoothly that day. I had got up early in the morning, strictly at 5:30 am, as my alarm clock had not been slow to remind me. I had opened the fridge, and had had an abundant breakfast, in order to give myself the energy necessary to manage the long day of work.

Then, when I had finished eating, I had headed for the wardrobe, and put my suit. I had dressed calmly, in front of the wardrobe mirror, and while I was fastening my cuffs, I was humming in my head the music that flowed from the radio into my apartment.

Once dressed, I sat on my bed (placed in front of the wardrobe of clothes) and put on my shoes. It may not seem like it, but I am very proud of my work shoes. They were one of the first purchases I had made when I arrived in Japan, I put them on the day I did my interview for my current job, and since then they have become a lucky charm for me.

Once I put my shoes on, I got up and walked quickly to the window, where my briefcase was placed. I opened it and mentally checked to have everything I needed for the day, after which I closed it and walked towards the door.

Before leaving, I looked warmly to the apartment where I lived. It was not very large, and frankly, I could have done without the huge neon sign placed right in front of the window, but it was still home. It was a place where I could truly be myself, free of the judgments and opinions of the outside world. A protected oasis, just for me.

"My beautiful house" I said gazing over it "Let nobody take you away from me…"

Then I closed the door, and the house stood empty.

​

It was three years now that I had been living in Japan. When I had arrived for the first time from Europe, I remember being very disoriented and confused before such a strange land. At that time, I would never have believed that I would have come to consider this place my homeland.

Yet, here I was, three years later, a young Westerner fully integrated in the Japanese business world, perfectly able to read the language, as well as to speak it, and not having to depend on western ethnic food to feed myself.

This does not mean that I had completely forgotten my roots: once a week I would go to the bank to make a transfer of money to my family, who had remained in Europe, for their needs and for my grandmother's nursing care. In addition, once a month I would travel by plane to visit my family, which they always welcomed with happiness and joy. Although my choice of moving to Japan had not gone down well, over time they had stopped begging me to go back to Europe and had accepted my decision.

The only thing they had not accepted yet was my life as a single. Every time we talked, somehow, the topic would come up, and they constantly asked me about my romantic and sentimental situation. Personally, I was not yet ready to look for a girlfriend: my plans for the future expected me to concentrate on my work, to cement my position in the company.

This choice was not only due to personal reasons: recently the company where I was working had started a very fierce policy of staff cuts, and the idea of being fired or reprimanded because I had not managed to achieve the goals set was not pleasant.

These were hard times, but also full of opportunities. If I could prove my qualities at the right time, I might be able to improve my job position relatively easily, without struggling for power.

The best way to do it.

​

In a big company like the one where I worked, it was very important to always do your best. For this reason, I had set my alarm clock in such a way as to be able to be in the workplace slightly earlier. An employee who arrives in advance by definition is never late, and an employee who is never late has less chance of being noticed by a HR manager.

Once I entered, I immediately started to work hard to start the day in the most productive way possible. A very important skill at work is to be organized, and that is why I always did things in exactly the same order every day. In this way, if I was not sure whether or not I had completed a particular operation, I could check it without having to interrupt the current task.

Another strategy that I used strongly was towards my work colleagues, to win them over and to minimize my opposition. To achieve this, I bought everyone a cup of coffee. It was amazing how a good morning coffee could change people. I made extensive use of it: I knew my colleagues' preferences by heart, as well as if they preferred their coffee with milk, sugar or cream.

I was just heading for the coffee machine when, without wanting it, I passed the office of the Human Resources Manager. I know I should not have heard what he was actually saying, but unfortunately, I had a bad habit of listening to anything that happens around me.

Inside the HR office, there was a fellow colleague of mine, Kuwahara Shoda, sitting on the chair right in front of the manager. I already knew why he was there: Shoda had already been called several times because he had been absent from work without permission, and he had ignored several company warnings to improve his work. And evidently, the manager had noticed it.

"What reason does the company have to continue employing you?" the manager asked to Shoda, his words cold as ice.

With those words, I realized that Shoda was condemned. There was nothing I could do for him, if I did not want to lose my job either.

"W-wait a second… Please!" Shoda said, still incredulous about what was happening.

The manager took out something from underneath and put it on the table, so that Shoda took it.

"Please leave."

It was then that I realized that if they had found out that I was spying on the conversation, I would have had the end of Shoda too. So I reached the machine as quietly as possible, and I stood with my back to the office, trying to appear ignorant of what was going on behind me.

It did not take long. Shoda came out of the office crying, his eyes wet with tears. In silence, he walked over to his old post, to take what was his before leaving for the last time.

Many people would have felt pity, even sympathy for Shoda. After all, he was a family man; he had a wife and a daughter, both of whom were dependent on him for their upkeep

Not me.

The working world was a ruthless place, similar to the ferocity of a tank full of piranhas. Eat or being eaten, this was the rule. It was natural that those who were not able to play their part were devoured. Worse, I did not think his family was an excuse to keep him: if he really knew how important his work was, why did he not tried to improve himself?

I shrugged, and devoted myself to the coffee making.

​

The clock ran slowly, but the end of the workday arrived and we were free to go home. Since I had not yet earned enough money for the purchase of a private vehicle, I headed for the station to catch the train. Usually, if the day had been good enough, I would stop at the station's bookstore to see if I could find any books that might arouse my interest. Today, however, I did not want new books.

I tapped my card on the scanner and rushed in, starting to wait for the train with extreme impatience. Personally, I hoped to be in a good position to allow myself to be among the first to enter the carriage, so that I could more easily find a free seat. However, evidently someone else had also made my own reasoning, because while I bending my head forward to see the approaching train, I felt someone touching my left shoulder.

I looked to the left, and I realized with my great surprise that it was the HR Manager that had fired Shoda. He was reading a book with yellow cover with the title "Freedom of Choice". He seemed not to have noticed me, at least for the moment.

Instinctively, I wondered if it would be advisable to call his attention. Greeting a superior out of office hours could earn me points for my charisma and my kindness. However, if I had done it the wrong way, I could have risked to make it clear that my kindness was not sincere. I had to find the right phrase to start the conversation.

Then it happened.

I did not know how, but Shoda was there. Perhaps he had found himself there by chance, or he had followed the manager secretly when he had left work. In any case, he was still dressed in his work clothes, a sign that he had not returned home as we had expected.

He waited for the train to be close enough, he put himself right behind the manager, and pushed him with both hands off the platform and onto the tracks, right into the path of the upcoming train, shocking everyone present of his blatant murder in full sight of dozens of people.

I did not remember what I thought in those brief moments, I just remembered that I reached out and grabbed the manager, trying desperately to save him. But it was impossible for me, a young adult who had never done gym, to stop an adult man from falling against all the forces of gravity.

Within seconds, the manager's weight had pulled me too, leading me straight into the train's trajectory. I saw the train driver's eyes open with surprise as he saw two men finishing in his path, too close for him to stop in time.

In those brief second before being hit by the train and dying, I wondered if my last, desperate act of goodwill would have earned me a place in Heaven.

Then, the time stopped.

​

I was still there. In the station. Stopped in midair, in the middle of the track. The manager under me. Shoda on the platform, behind us. The train, on our right, ready to crush us once time started moving again.

"What? What happened?" I heard from below me.

"Sir, are you ok?" I said back, making his eyes focus on me.

"I…know you?"

"Yes! We work in the same company!"

"You mean you are…"

"I'm getting tired of this" said a man suddenly behind Shoda, on the platform.

"Huh?" we both said as we focused on him.

"Humans these days have no sense of right and wrong," said a woman with a cellphone, looking in our direction

"They've strayed too far from the laws of the universe" this time a man with a strange beret and glasses spoke.

"What are they saying?" the manager told.

"What's happening?" I asked timorously.

"They have no ability to empathize with others," said a tall girl with red hairs.

It was evident that someone (or something) was speaking through their mouths. Probably, the same being who had stopped time a second before the train turned us both into hamburgers meat.

"And not a trace of faith in their Creator" this time was a pigeon to talk.

"The Creator?" the manager asked.

"Indeed" said the train driver.

"I see. So I am to understand that the being known as «God» has stopped time in the moments before mine and this young man's death, appearing as people around us?" the manager said.

I did not say anything. I was too afraid to say even one word.

"Indeed" said the pigeon back.

"Ok. Listen, I'm sorry to say this after you came all the way down here, but I reject God's existence, from both realistic and rational perspectives," the manager said

"What?"/"What?" I said, along with five other people.

"Thinking logically" the manager started back "only God and the Devil could exist beyond our knowledge of the world. But, hypothetically, if God were to exist, he would never let this absurdity happen. In other words, you must be…"

"The devil?" a cute high-school girl said.

"Or perhaps something similar, which we could call «Being X»"

The high schooler frowned. Whoever was controlling it at that moment, should not have liked such a reasoning.

"Apparently, you truly do lack faith" her mouth was moving again.

"It's senseless to start lecturing me on faith," the manager said, still motionless "If a thing like this is going to happen, you need to submit the details to me in advance and in writing"

I was stunned. I did not know if I should have been afraid for my manager (because he was clearly challenging something bigger than he was) or felt respect for him (because managed to get God in a circular argument).

"I am that which returns people to the wheel of reincarnation, initiating rebirth." said a young boy who was clapping his hand with a friend "But I shall make an exception for you"

"The wheel of reincarnation?" the manager asked, "You're saying that you cause people to be reborn?"

"That is no longer your concern," said another man.

"Are you unfamiliar with the concept of «duty of disclosure»?" the manager responded "And if you claim to be God, you should try to put more thoughts into your decisions"

"Administering seven billion people is already beyond my capacity" said a man looking at his watch.

"Reincarnating people without faith is a waste of my time" another man continued.

"Overwork is the sign of a failed business model," the manager responded, "You failed to sufficiently analyze consumer consciousness. In a world with advanced science, where one's need are met, there will be no faith."

I was stunned. I was amazed. This manager was openly criticizing God. And he was winning.

"And you, young man?" said the train driver looking at me.

"Me… what?" I asked.

"What's your opinion about this heathen's rambling?" the high schooler said.

"Well, I don't think I have the authority to judge anyone" I said, trying to calm the waters "Also, I do not think I can say to anyone he must convert to something he does not really believe in. There is freedom of worship! And even atheists have the full right to exist!"

The high schooler frowned again. That was when I realized my speech had backfired.

"Your faith and devotion in me is very weak. You are not a true believer" another woman said.

"Sorry, but where do you think you are? in the Middle Ages? At the time of the Inquisition?" now it was my turn to argue with the alleged divinity "Times have changed. Do not they teach it in catechism now that we must respect the beliefs of others?"

"As a human born and baptized in my name, you must have faith in you God and defend it" said the pigeon.

"As a human who had the privilege of studying, I surely will respect the freedom of choice that we, as humans, receive the day we are born. And if I can afford it, a god who is not able to defend himself even in words is pathetic!"

"Good point, young man" said the manager "You must realize it: only the weak, when they are in dire straits, cling to someone. Someone like me, or like this boy over here, would never do that."

"So, basically, your lack of faith is because," said a baby in a baby-carriage.

"you live in a world where needs are met, science is advanced" said a boy looking at his telephone.

"you have a strong social position" said a side of beef.

"and you are not in dire straits?" said a dog in a cage.

"Huh?" the manager said "W-wait a second! I think you may be jumping at the conclusions." It was the first time I saw him scared, and seeing his fear made me scared too.

"If I put you?" said the tall girl of before.

"into the «dire straits»" said the watch-watching man.

"you speak of" said the train driver.

"your faith" said the first man.

"will awaken?" said the pigeon.

"C-calm down!" the manager said, clearly scared "I don't intend to break any rules!"

"And you" said the baby.

"young man" said the dog.

"since you" said the high-schooler.

"defended him" said the man with glasses.

"maybe" said an old lady.

"you need" said the train driver.

"the same" said Shoda.

"as well?" said the pigeon.

"Hey! This is not fair! I was just trying to calm the situation!" I protested.

"TRY TO LIVE AS LONG AS YOU CAN. IF YOU WILL DIE AGAIN, THERE WILL BE NO SECOND REINCARNATION, FOR BOTH OF YOU." everybody said concurrently.

"W-wait…" the manager said

"This is not fair! This is not…" I said.

And then time started running again, and we both were hit by the train.​