1 hold up... what did you say?

The brightness of the area around me hurts my damn eyes. It feels like staring into the fucking bright dimension. This is worse then discord light mode... ok who am I kidding this is slightly less bright but that's not much better!!! Where the fuck am I anyway?

| You child, are dead |

What in the fuck was that. Wait are you god!? Fuck I was betting you didn't exist. Uh I promise to repent?

| You are a bad liar, if I was the being you speak of I'd be disappointed with your behavior |

Ehh so were my parents so one more nagging voice won't be so bad. And wait a damn minute if you're not god with a capital G then who in the gad damn are you!?

| I, my misguided child am a being who originally took pity in the way you died |

Hey last I checked dying at 16 isn't thaaaaat baaaaaad. (Kinda) look in my defense I don't remember how I died, so what was so pitiful about it huh!?

| Besides the fact that you tripped on your way out of the bathroom, fell on you step sister, grab her chest, she then flipped you in a way you fell off the banister, and the plummet to the ground with what you children call a "chub". Oh nothing about your death was pitiful, if you want I can explain exactly how pitiful you have to be to end up on my radar and not that water goddess's, I could |

I think I get it (prick). Wait if I'm dead does that mean I get reincarnated!? Hell yeah! I'm gonna get cool powers!

| You are correct about one thing you are going to be reincarnated. And to help you I'll let you have one of three gifts |

Huh that seems kinda limited... ehh it's probably pretty good shit then right?

| ... |

Why did you just go silent on me? Hello? Mr disembodied voice? If you don't respond I'll recite the entirety of the communist manifesto!

| why do you know the entirety of the communist manifesto |

That was a bluff. But it tells me you can't read my mind. Heh get nye nyed.

| are you sure you died when you were 16... |

That's a lot of shit coming from a guy who probably doesn't have a dick.

| the longer I listen to you surface level thoughts the more I want to just hand you off to your actual afterlife |

Wait wait I'll behave I promise! What do I gotta do for you forgive me big guy c'mon.

| Just be quiet long enough for me to tell you the gifts you can receive please |

(Oh wow he actually sounds defeated) I will of great god with a uncapital G

| ... |

Well go on I'll stop thinking it it helps

| [just you wait you little shit I'll make your second life a hell for my own amusement] the first gift you can pick from is {eyes of another world} these eyes would allow you to something similar to stats in your "video games" |

Damn little g you sound hella old right now... oh right my b. What next a big sword or somethin?

| ... well yes actually... |

The fact that I was able to guess that is just sad...

| anyway there is the next gift is the sword of the sixth hero...|

(aww poor guy he actually sounds sad. I almost feel bad... good thing I take joy in beating little kids in online lego games or I actually might feed bad.)

| the 6th hero was the most clever and tricky of all the heroes that came before and after him |

Yeah sorry Chief but I'm more of a magic guy then sword guy

| Is that so? Then the next gift would be to your liking magic as soon as you are reincarnated. As for reference, magic is really hard to manifest. Out of ten-thousand people only one would be a mage of any kind |

Sheeeeeeesh you had me at magic I'll take it!

| oh? I should have told you I get to pick what magic you'd get |

I could feel the slimy grin as he said that

"Wait hold what did you sa"

| good luck out there kiddo and welcome to the word of Anastasia |