Chapter 5

Ares chose his words carefully. I could see it in his eyes. He saw how fragile I was as he took my hand and led me to sit down at the place I had just been at. I pulled away and wrapped my hands around my body, not looking him in the eyes. I knew it would hurt him. I did it anyway.

The mate pull thrummed through me. Our close proximity meant I was already feeling lightheaded and the place he had held me previously was aching with the last tendrils of contact. The feeling was euphoric, but I couldn't enjoy it, all I could think of was if he shared the same experiences with his new female.

I couldn't speak first. I had to show him I was not desperate for contact with him, even if it was a lie. I looked at the grass beneath us and concentrated on that while I waited for him to speak. I could feel his eyes on me, I longed to get lost in them, but I held strong and didn't cave.

"May..." He began, and a shudder rang through me. I reacted instantly and my eyes snapped to his despite my earlier attempt to not look at him. It was as if all he could muster up was my name, I hadn't heard him say anything that was akin to some sort of apology as to why he was here, some sort of explanation or advice. What he gave to me a few weeks ago was not it, under the watchful eyes of his father he let me leave with a mere few words and an empty promise.

He knew what he was doing. By saying my name, he was enticing me with the pleasurable feelings the mate pull would ignite in me. It would make me less angry towards him, more relaxed and more susceptible to his advances.

"Don't say my name." I whispered, not trusting my voice not to crack if I spoke louder.

This was all too much for me. I already knew he came to formally reject me, why else would he be here? My wolf was so foolish for leading us here, but I was even more foolish for coming on this walk in the first place.

"Just reject me already." I said, holding my breath.

I willed my legs to move; to stand me up and carry me away and back home - anywhere but here. But I stayed in place, my body frozen in time. The mate pull would not let me leave.

"I'd never do that." Ares growled lightly, searching my eyes for a reaction. His eyes kept flashing to his wolf and I knew I'd triggered some sort of anger within him with my mention of rejection, but I didn't care. Though it surprised me that he said that, it would only be a matter of time until he went back on his word and rejected me. Whatever plans his father had would not be dismissed simply because of me.

I chuckled darkly. "You might as well. It's not like you can disobey a direct order from your father."

He began to speak but I cut him off, anger fuelling my words. "Why are you even here? Your father gave us a direct order not to see each other."

"I couldn't stay away. The mate pull...you know that...you feel it." Ares said, his voice quiet but pleading.

It was a strange experience; being so close to the Alpha's son like this when we'd previously had little to no reason to talk to each other. In any other situation I should've been speaking to him respectfully, eyes drawn to the ground and voice low but as his mate I was essential his equal now and my wolf was not compelled to submit as other wolves would be. It was...surreal.

"Sometimes I wish I didn't." I whispered under my breath.

It was true, sometimes I did wish the mate pull didn't affect me. Just look at what it had done to me in less than a month; I had lost most of my appetite, my eyes were sunken in and tired. If it weren't for the wolf genes that thrummed through my veins, I would be worse. I shouldn't have said that, I knew it would hurt him a lot, but I wanted to hurt him as much as he had hurt me.

Ares growled lowly at my answer, and I tensed, not anticipating his aggressive reaction. I had the overwhelming urge to look into his eyes at that moment but instead I cast my eyes down to the ground, not wishing to entertain his wolf as I was sure he was present.

It didn't hold strong though. Waves of power beckoned my gaze and I met Ares', eyes set in a hard frown as he studied my features. His eyes darkened and his hand twitched like he was waiting to do something, weighing up the options in his head. He must have come to a decision though as in one swift motion he wrapped his arms around me and brought me to him. I tensed but couldn't stop myself from immediately relaxing in his arms, my wolf brimming with excitement as I lay frozen.

"What are you doing?" I asked, my back flush against his chest.

He stayed silent and buried his head in the crook of my neck, inhaling my scent and tightening his grip on me. I struggled against him but truly I was happy he was showing me affection, my wolf ecstatic in my mind. I was being torn between the happy feelings of the mate pull that wouldn't allow me to pull away, and my anger, which wanted me to push him away and never speak to him again.

Ares pulled away from me and cupped my cheek, turning my gaze to face him. I pondered on whether or not to meet his eyes and decided to, it wasn't like I could do much to resist the urge and I'd eventually give in.

He was calm again, his eyes a beautiful soft brown in contrast with his masculine features and slight stubble that decorated his hard jaw. His Alpha genes were enticing, attractive and I was prideful my mate was an Alpha even with the complicated circumstances. His broad, muscular chest and arms fully engulfed my small body and I felt protected, safe as we stared at each other.

"You're in my head. Even when you're not supposed to be." He mumbled into my hair.

I never knew Ares could be this gentle. Granted, it was as I was his mate, he could show this side of himself, I knew I'd never see this if we were in public, but it was nice. It was a deep contrast to the masculine, aggressive energy I always saw and reassured me that he was as much in tune with the mate pull as I was, and maybe was even embracing it more than I was.

I stayed silent again; I didn't even know what to say. I was in his head? Of course, I was!

He grumbled and his brown eyes met mine again, nose wrinkling as he chuckled down at me.

"I can smell your anger. My wolf wants to comfort you." He stated tracing circles onto my skin.

I shuddered under his touch and fought the urge to close my eyes, feeling my anger almost dissipate entirely. Such was the curse of the mate pull, a cloud of pleasurable feelings that would rain down on me so long as Ares didn't reject me.

Rejection.

I came to my sense and shuffled against him. Our scents were mixed and as much as it pleased my wolf, it angered me. The pack would surely know we were together once we went to the pack dinner, his father would be angry but more at me than him as his Alpha genes would excuse his behaviour, I would be cast to the back just as soon as his new female came back and then what? We rinse and repeat until the time comes when he formally rejects me, and I'm shattered.

A million thoughts rushed through my head and my anger came back in waves, choking the mate pull and agitating my wolf so I began to feel uncomfortable in the arms of Ares.