Disappointment that Shouldn't Exist

"Why are you here? Where's Rad?" The question burst out of Bree's mouth spontaneously.

"I don't know, Duchess. But he asked me to take over as your instructor." Edmond explained with a friendly smile. He no longer seemed bothered, having accepted his fate.

"I hope you..." Edmond stopped talking, realizing that Bree wasn't paying any attention to him.

The woman in front of him just stared with empty eyes. Lost in thought.

Bree was cursing herself vehemently. Bree was angry with herself because her heart revealed an emotion that shouldn't exist. That emotion was disappointment. Her initial reaction upon hearing the news was disappointment. Disappointment because she didn't see Rad under that tree.

Afterward, Bree felt utterly humiliated. Disappointment shouldn't have been there. She shouldn't feel disappointed; she should be glad Rad wasn't there. Disappointment meant Bree still held some hope of meeting Rad, even though hatred dominated her. Disappointment meant there was a part of her feelings that Bree couldn't erase.

This self-awareness kept Bree silent. Realizing that hatred could coexist with longing.

"You just have to learn to forget and ignore. No need to be disappointed." Bree unintentionally uttered the thoughts in her head.

"Sorry, did you say something?" Edmond furrowed his brow, only catching a mumble.

"Nothing!" Bree retorted. But Edmond had already heard part of the mumble.

"Sorry for disappointing you, Duchess. Duke Valois surely has his reasons, and..."

"I'm not disappointed!" Bree snapped, making Edmond step back as she unconsciously swung the sword in her hand.

"Of course... of course, you're not disappointed."

Edmond raised his hands, asking Bree to calm down. In his mind, Edmond complained because the two Valois he served both had 'pleasant' temperaments.

"Let's just start today's lesson." Edmond managed to smile amid his complaints.

Bree nodded, then moved to a shadier area to begin the training. Taking a deep breath to focus and listen to Edmond.

"Duke Valois said..."

"Stop mentioning his name!" Bree's sharp retort made Edmond close his eyes in surprise.

Bree was irritated because, when Edmond mentioned Rad's name, the concentration she had painstakingly gathered immediately dissipated.

"All right, Duchess."

Edmond gave in. He didn't understand what the issue was between Rad and Bree, but now he understood that replacing Rad in teaching was more about feelings than Rad's busy schedule.

"Your previous instructor mentioned that you'd just mastered the basics of swinging a sword." Edmond emphasized the word, affirming that he was right not to mention Rad's name.

"So now you'll start practicing on a target."

Bree stood and watched as Edmond raised a stake wrapped in straw, commonly used to scare birds, and firmly planted it in the middle of a farm field. Edmond searched for soft ground and firmly planted the object.

"Do you want to scare birds?" Bree didn't understand.

Edmond chuckled. "Not like that, Duchess."

"This thing looks like a scarecrow, but it's not. It's a target that you'll use for sword practice. Eventually, you must be able to injure it." While pointing to the part of the dummy covered in thick straw, Edmond explained.

"Oh..." Bree understood now. She had to be able to attack a fake person before a real one.

"Now that you've learned to swing, you'll learn to slash."

Edmond drew his sword and asked Bree to step back a bit as he demonstrated. Unlike Rad, Edmond gripped the handle with both hands when swinging his sword. Edmond's sword sliced the side of the dummy, causing its straw bindings to scatter.

"Is there a difference between holding the sword with one hand or two?" Bree wanted to know which was more practical.

"Oh, did you see Duke... I mean, the person who taught you before, swinging the sword with one hand?"

Bree nodded.

"Maybe you shouldn't imitate that because it will be difficult." Edmond shook his head.

"Was that teaching wrong?" Bree was clearly about to get angry because all the previous exercises would be useless if they were wrong.

"Not wrong, but you will find it difficult later on. It won't be a problem to use one or two hands when learning basic swings. But once you get into slashing, I think you should start using two hands. To prepare for the weight of the sword later on." Edmond restrained Bree's anger with a hurried explanation.

"There is no need to be angry. Your training isn't in vain." Edmond asked softly.

"Oh, sorry." For a moment, Bree returned to her less brusque self, just like when she thanked Edmond for saving her.

Edmond nodded with a relieved smile. "So let's begin."

Edmond invited Bree to stand in front of the dummy and start her training.

Bree followed Edmond's instructions, gripping the sword handle with both hands. Her current sword was light, but Edmond was right; after this, she would wield a heavier sword.

"You're missing."

Edmond stepped forward, correcting Bree's grip, and there was nothing special about it. Bree's heart was fine, unlike when... Bree wanted to curse because her mind drifted to memories of Rad correcting her movements.

"Concentrate."

"Right, you have to concentrate so your target doesn't escape."

Bree said it a bit loudly, and Edmond agreed, although he didn't know the context. After Edmond adjusted her position, Bree began slashing with the sword. It didn't produce a cut, but it was decent.

"Stronger." Edmond advised, and Bree nodded, then smiled.

She had a way to be more enthusiastic about this training. She just had to imagine Rad's face on the dummy's head. Her motivation to swing the sword became stronger afterward.

***

"Enjoying the activities today?"

"Very enjoyable, Your Grace."

Edmond sighed ironically. Rad's questions were annoying to Edmond. He preferred teaching his own subordinates. At least he could freely curse and get angry with them. With Bree, he had to be polite.

"You didn't seem to mind earlier. You two seem quite close." Rad stared out the window in front of him. His office was next to the training field.

Rad was looking at Bree, who was still training there. Edmond had finished the session, but Bree stayed behind, practicing her sword swings to make them stronger. Reluctantly, Rad acknowledged again that Bree's spirit was greater than others.

"What are you carrying?"

Rad asked about the rolled-up paper Edmond held in his hand. Diverting his gaze from Bree. Resuming the work that hadn't made much progress since earlier because it was challenging to concentrate.

"This is a letter from Duke Donovan," Edmond said.

"What's it about?" Rad extended his hand, asking for the letter.

He knew Edmond had read it, as Rad trusted him to check all incoming correspondence. Rad didn't want to read news that wasn't essential. If the letter reached him, it meant Edmond had examined its contents and deemed it important.

"Duke Donovan is coming here." Edmond mentioned the news while Rad read the longer version.

"For what?" Rad didn't understand because Donovan didn't mention the purpose in his letter. Bree's father only mentioned the arrival date and that he would come with his other daughter, Amber.

"Misses his daughter, I suppose." Edmond suggested a reasonable explanation that Rad should easily understand.

"Oh..." Rad nodded in understanding.

The concept of missing someone was absent from Rad's dictionary. That's why he didn't understand why Donovan had to come all the way here. The journey was long and exhausting. The distance between Marseilles and Le Mans could not be completed in a single day.