8 Moving Forward

Seconds passed into minutes; minutes passed into hours; hours passed into days, and it had been several days but Lucas still hadn't finished looking into his memories and experiences.

Leya was in no rush, however, as she was getting to spend more quality time with her baby. They both lay comfortably on the lotus' soft and cushiony top, hugging each other.

They weren't in their real bodies as they lay here. It was just their souls present. Their real bodies were in the Seven Divine Rainbow Palace.

It was because of Leya's magic that the two of them were able to feel each other and be in each other's embrace without any problems. It felt as if they were in their real bodies and weren't just souls without a material body.

Few more weeks passed.

Lucas finally showed signs of waking up. His eyelids and fingers trembled slightly and in a few minutes, he slowly opened his eyes.

The first thing Lucas saw after opening his eyes was his mother's beautiful smiling face. She was staring at him with love and warmth.

Noticing this, he smiled and said, "I am sorry, I doubted you, mom."

Leya's face showed surprise as she heard this. Her son definitely had changed. But it was a good change, she liked it.

She caressed his hair and said, "it's no big deal, baby."

Lucas placed his head back down on her and closed his eyes. He started recalling all those days of suffering he felt in his thirty-four lives. They were really tragic. He hugged his mother tighter and tears were threatening to fall out of his eyes.

He really missed her and he was very glad that she was alive and well. In his reincarnations, his mother and sister would always die when he was around the age of ten to thirteen and he would spend the rest of his life wondering how things would be if the two were alive and together with him.

But finally, he was out of his reincarnations and his nightmare was over.

Lucas also realized the true meaning of familial love and understood mortal life much more deeply after he got out of his reincarnation.

Before he always had the thought that it wouldn't matter if he wiped out worlds. The importance of everyone else's life in his eyes was nothing. Crushing an ant or wiping out worlds were equivalent to him.

He was very true to his title called 'The Destroyer'. But now he understood mortal life and learnt a lot many things. He knew he shouldn't go around destroying everything and he knew he needed to find the balance.

It was only today he realized why his older sister had to work so hard. The reason was him!

He created so many imbalances and problems, so much disorder in the universe that his sister had to constantly work to fix these issues and balance things out. He felt a bit sad knowing he had given his sister such a hard time all this while.

Leya could feel that Lucas was feeling melancholic. She roughly had a guess as to what he was thinking about and so she didn't try to cheer him up. She let everything flow naturally.

Lucas needed to understand things better and it was for his own good. Though it pained Leya everyday when she watched her baby suffer and it pained her even now as she was feeling his melancholic mood, but, nothing could be done about it.

She caressed his hair and waited for him to speak. She couldn't rush him to do so and could only wait.

A few minutes later, Lucas got up from her embrace and sat down beside her, cross-legged. Leya got up too and sat cross-legged like him. Both were sitting facing each other.

"Mom, where's big sis?" Lucas asked about his big sister.

"In the Mystic Cloud Palace, busy with work." Leya answered with a smile.

Lucas nodded. "So the usual. I won't disturb her then."

Leya nodded in understanding.

Lucas then said, "Mom, I've understood many things by spending my time in the mortal worlds. Though I am a little salty about you using such a method to teach me things, but, it's okay because when I think about how much the improvement in myself was, it all negates this small suffering of mortal life. Also, I feel it was okay to do so because I really was giving too much troubles to big sis and I am sure my tendencies to destroy my own self were troubling you as well"

Hearing this, Leya felt happy that he had finally realized things. She held his face with both her hands and bent forward to give him a warm and loving kiss on his forehead. She didn't say anything else after doing so and simply sat back in her position.

She didn't console him or scold him or say anything regarding the matter he just spoke about. He hadn't finished speaking, she knew about it and thus waited for him to speak.

Lucas looked at her with a determined gaze and said,

"Mom, I want to live the mortal life and redo everything again. I've learnt so many things, I want to test it out whether I really have changed or not."

He took a pause and then a deep breath and continued speaking. "The 35th reincarnation of mine would be about whether I'll retain my sanity… or become a maniac who topples the balance of order and chaos and destroys everything."

Leya raised her brows in amusement as she heard Lucas say this. What a good determination he had. Her boy had really grown a lot it seems.

Lucas held Leya's hand and continued, "mom, I'll try my best to balance everything out. I don't want to give big sis a difficult time and I also don't want to destroy everything you've made and most importantly kill my own self. I also understand now that the mortal life is also important."

Leya simply smiled and said in a gentle tone, "mama understands, baby. When do you want your 35th reincarnation to be and where do you want it to be?"

Lucas thought about it and after a few seconds, he said, "I don't really know. Hmm, I think we can do one thing. But before that, mom, I have to ask you something."

Leya nodded and said, "what is it?"

"Mom, in my 35th reincarnation, please be my family again and please don't die." Lucas said with a sad smile.

Leya nodded and said, "got it. Anything else?"

Lucas then said, "about when and where to reincarnate and start my 35th mortal life, the me with my past memories and experiences really does not know. I am back to being Chaos currently. However, the me of the 34th reincarnation surely knows about things.

How about you seal my memories and we get back to the White Jade Pavilion where I entered after dying in my 34th mortal life. Please just ensure that I have all the experiences and memories of that life and I somehow also know about many things and experiences from the time of my birth, till present.

Seal my thirty-three mortal life memories, the memory of me being Chaos, the Creator being my mom, the Preserver being my sister, etc. After that, just interview me again in White Jade Palace like before and maybe I'll have an answer for you.

Please start this process now."

Leya nodded and said, "understood. But don't you want to meet your big sis before you begin your 35th mortal life?"

Lucas shook his head and said, "she'll be reincarnating along with you and me anyway. We'll be back to being family again in my 35th life, there's no need to meet her now as I'll meet her later anyway."

Leya nodded and wrapped her arms around Lucas and the two vanished from the lotus' too.

…..

White Jade Palace, Elysium.

Lucas sat on a chair near a white round table and in front of him sat a goddess who's beauty seemed unparalleled to him.

The goddess smiled and asked Lucas in a gentle tone, "stared enough?"

Lucas shook his head and staring at her, he said in a flat tone,

"No. Hold on for a few more minutes. Maybe hours, no, days… hmm… months or years would do too. Let me look more."

Hearing this, the goddess smiled and asked after clearing her throat, "ehem. Do you know where you are currently?"

The teen shook his head. "I don't know but if I were to guess, maybe it's the afterlife?"

The goddess nodded and said, "that's right, Lucas. This is the afterlife."

Lucas nodded. Nothing special. He kind of expected it. The bastard truck-kun did make sure that he isekai'd him and did his job well.

'If I ever reincarnate again, I'll make sure that I destroy at least twenty-one trucks to honour truck-kun for isekaing me into another world and taking me out of my miserable life. Hmm… that aside, why does everything seem familiar here? And why does this lady look familiar too?' Lucas thought to himself.

He looked at the goddess and asked, "why does everything around look familiar? And also why do you look familiar to me?"

Leya shrugged hearing it and said, "who knows? Maybe you had met me in your previous life as well here?"

Lucas nodded hearing it. That could be the case. This may not be the first time he may have died. He then asked her, a bit curiously,

"If I may have met you before, why do I have no memory about it? And also why do I have no memory about my other lives if I may really have met you again?"