Chapter 18: Disappointed

"Sergeant Bellingham, I would like you to exit the room please. I need but a moment," my father commanded Jace.

Jace saluted. "Sir."

He left the room after offering me a reassuring grin.

I remained quiet as I stared down at the white sheets over my legs. Air wouldn't fill my lungs, because it was too thick with the tension rising from my body.

My father was dressed in his uniform, decorated with all the colors from the rankings he had earned. His cap was under his left arm.

He didn't look at me, and made his way to the open window of my hospital room, where the curtains gently flapped against the wall as the cold winter breeze flew in.

He closed the window, making it even harder for me to breathe.

I knew my father wasn't here to ask me if I'm okay; to praise me for escaping the mafia so bravely; to give me a hug and tell me that he was glad I'm safe and that he was proud of me.

No, my father was here to crush my self-worth under his polished shoe.

"Officer Bellingham, do you realize the weight of what you have done?" His voice was calm and cold as stone.

"Yes, Sir," I muttered.

"No, I don't think you do," he turned to face me. He was a shortish man, and didn't have to look down that much to meet my eyes, but it felt like I was a tiny ant looking up at him. "You placed your superior in danger and injured him to the point where he will not lead a normal life anymore. Because you lacked skill. And you are wreckless."

"Father, you need to believe me--"

He held up his hand to silence me. No expression. "What you have done is unforgivable, and I should have your badge for it."

My world cracked in half.

No. This could not be happening.

If I lose my badge, I lose everything. My family, my honor. The chance to change my father's mind about me.

"However," he said, stopping all the thoughts in my mind and causing me to clutch my covers with white knuckles. "Lieutenant Parker, soon to be Captain, convinced me not to."

What? Why would he do that? What would he gain?

Leverage. I keep my badge if I kept quiet. He was keeping me under his thumb.

"He claims that young officers all make mistakes as they are eager - desperate - to prove themselves. So, he suggested that I give you another chance," my father said.

Bile rose in my throat.

My father paced the room, towards the door. "I don't know how many more chances I will give you. You are nearly twenty-four and still haven't received a promotion. When your brothers were your age they have long started working on more important cases. And here you are; continuously making a jokr out of our family."

"Father, I--"

"This is your last chance. Your punishment will only be a few more years without promotion. If you mess up again, I will take your badge, and you can forget ever setting foot in my house again." He slid the door open. "You should not have escaped from them. You should have just stayed in the clutches of the mafia, and have been killed. They are brainless if they think that torturing and killing you would make me give up my control over this city."

Without another word, my father left the room, but the damage that his words have done to me remained.

I fought against the tears threatening to spill over my cheeks.

Exactly three days later I was back at work. William and Jace wanted me to rest some more, but I refused. I couldn't be alone with my thoughts anymore or I'd have gone insane. Besides, I had to figure out a way to do Danté's assignment.

William wanted a few officers to keep an eye on me, just in case The Inferno or The Riot came for me. Father refused his request, however, saying that he didn't want to waste any man power on such a trivial task. So, now whenever William could, he would be around me - guarding me. Although it was nice that he cared about me that much, it made me feel like I was lacking as a police officer, since I wasn't capable of protecting myself.

Sergeant Marx found me getting out of a police car outside the building, after I finished sorting out a small domestic dispute.

"Officer Bellingham, how are you?"

"I'm doing fine, thank you, Sir. Is there anything I could do for you?" I asked.

He nodded. "Yes, actually. I need to head out with a few officers to investigate a crime scene, and I need someone to take these to Captain Bellingham."

My mother. This could be a chance for me to get access to her computer.

I took the papers he handed me. On top was a fire drill schedule.

"She needs to have the CCTV cameras set up and ready for the fire drill tomorrow. Just in case someone might take advantage and snoop around," Sergeant Marx said.

I thought about Damian and how he always snooped around the station without even being captured by CCTV cameras - even on days that didn't have fire drills.

"I'll get these to her, Sir. Goodluck on your case," I said with a salute.

"Thank you, you're always so eager to help, unlike some of these other little bastards," Sergeant Marx muttered.

"You may enter," my mother's voice exclaimed from the other side of her office door.

I entered the dark office, filled with screens. In the center, my mother sat behind three enormous monitors, which were part of a high-end computer. She tapped away on a keyboard, and the smell of take-out hung in the air.

"You should stop eating take-out. It's bad for you," I said as I closed the door behind me.

Mom looked at me from the side of ome of the monitors, and adjusted her glasses with a smile. "Venus, dear. I'm so sorry that I couldn't visit you in hospital. You know how it goes here."

"Yeah, I get it." I went to stand in front of her desk.

My mother was a workaholic if you've ever met one. She barely ever left her office, even when my brothers and I were kids. We grew up with nannies, while she was always at work.

"Sergeant Marx told me to give these to you," I said, and gave her the papers.

I took note of the time in which the fire drill was going to take place before entering her office. I could use it to sneak into my mother's office, since everyone is forced to evacuate the building - even my mother. I just had to think a few more things through tonight.

"Thanks, my dear," she said as she took the papers from me. In the darkness I could see the white lines between her brown hair as she moved her head.

I nodded.

Her face grew serious with concern. "I heard about the punishment your father gave you. It's going to suck. You'll have to work a lot harder."

As if I haven't been working hard already.

"Yes, ma'am," I said.

She scanned through the papers and pulled one out. "Oh, this seems to be a mistake. It says 'Sergeant J. Bellingham'. It's meant for your brother."

"I'll take it to him." I pointed to one of her monitors. "You don't have any idea where he might be?"

"I saw him walk into the third conference room about ten minutes ago. He was talking to a girl. Probably the victim or a suspect of some case he's busy with," Mom said as she scanned through her surveillance cameras.

"Ok, thank you, Ma'am. I'll see that this document reaches his hands," I said with a bow, before turning to leave.

"Vee," Mom said, stopping me. "I know you find it hard to fit in here, and that the whole police officer thing isn't really your cup of tea. But you're strong, and you'll make it work. You will make your father proud."

I didn't look at her.

"I will try my best," I responded.

"Be safe, okay?" My mother said as I left her office, and I simply nodded in response before closing the door between us.

The third conference room was on the third floor, near the drug investigations unit's department. I wondered why Jace would question someone on this floor, since his cases are mostly related to homicide, which had a department on the fourth floor.

But it did happen sometimes that a conference room was already full, then another one on another floor had to be used.

Or maybe he decided to help out in the drug department.

I shrugged it off and knocked on the door.

No response.

I knocked again.

Still, no one answered.

Could he have left already? Or maybe he just didn't hear me?

I opened the door a little bit, "Sergeant Bellingham, Sir?"

I peaked into the dark room. Maybe he did leave.

"Mmm," I heard from the corner of the room. I squinted.

I switched the lights on and wished I hadn't.

On the corner of the big conference table sat a girl with long blonde hair, with her shirt almost completely off. Her hands were around the neck of a wide-eyed Jace Bellingham, whose face was the color of a ripe strawberry. He was standing between her legs, and had his hands on her hips.

I clearly walked into something I shouldn't have.

"H-Hannah?!" I cried out in disbelief.

My best friend tugged her shirt closed and turned to smile a guilty smile. "Well, this is awkward..."