Chapter 22

"Where is your car?" I give him my bathroom towel. "Outside the yard" He dries his hair. "Is it safe?" I ask out of concern. "I think that it will be fine" He pulls me in for a passionate kiss. My fingertips trace his sculpted broad shoulders. I slowly pull back, "Lucas..." I stare at him in a daze. "Yes, Paris" He peers into my eyes. I rest my head on his shoulders. "I am afraid if we continue kissing, we will regret what happens after" I whisper in his ear. "Nothing that I will do with you will fill me with regret" He buries my face in his palms. "I will regret it" I sulk. "Why?" He raises my face so that we can look at each other's eyes.

"Because..."I nibble my lip, "We shouldn't do it" I escape from his embrace and sit on my bed. "Lucas, I don't do situation ships, fuck buddies or entanglement. I was heartbroken and I am not to put my heart on the silver platter for you to play with. I enjoy your company but..." I stop the words from finishing the sentence. "You want more? " He sits next to me. I keep quiet. I can feel my heart pound against my chest like it is trying to escape from the cage I built it in. "But I never said I wanted any of those things you said. I..." He pauses and runs his fingers on his hair. I look at him as he tries to gather words to say. The inevitable is happening.

"It is okay, you just enjoy my company, we can enjoy each other's company till we tire of each other " I turn my face to face the wall. "What, no...Paris I don't want that. I am just trying to find the right words to say to you" He turns his body to face mine. "I am really, really into you, a lot" He pauses, "Whenever I see you there are these feelings that overwhelm my heart, I feel a knot in my stomach, I want to hug you, I am so jealous when I see how hard Ntshu...yes, him, tries to separate us. I can stay all day like this. I think this feeling is more than what you described. I want to explore these feelings with you".

I turn to face him. I take a glimpse of his now flustered-looking face. "Is that a like? or Love? " I whisper the words. "More than a like, probably love but I want to be sure" He brushes my face with his warm palm. "That is not comforting but it is okay for now" I pout. He leans in his face, and I pull back, "No kissing, intimate embraces until we figure out our truest feelings. I don't want to get hurt" I put my finger on his lips. "What about a peck on the lip?" He pleads. "No...that won't be fair" I point out. "Cuddles? Sleepovers?" He persists. "Cuddles are intimate, sleepovers if it's very late" I love sleeping next to him. I blush. He pulls me in and keeps me in his firm embrace, "One last hug before the draught" He pretends to weep. "Lucas you are too much" I embrace his hug.

"I think the rain stopped" I parted my body from his embrace. "Are you chasing me away? " He raises his eyebrow. "No, but I thought it would be great if you knew..."I bite my lower lip. "Are you so scared of my touch?" He touches my face. "No, I just have this fear. I am scared of being the one to fall so hard while you..." I pause, "I sound so insecure" I let my body plop on the bed. He lies next time and pulls me in close to him facing his direction. He just brushed my face and peered at me with his warm gaze. "I wish I could sleep next to you every night like this, you look beautiful" He continues to trap me in his trance. I want to look away but I want to stay like this too, captivated by your beautiful eyes Lucas.

I position myself on his body and lie by his chest, listening to his calm heartbeat. Let me snooze a little on this broad chest, and savor this moment with you because it might be short-lived. I run my fingertips on his chest gently caressing the t-shirt against his skin. Even a mere touch of my tip against you has me in a daze. Is this love? Do I love you, Lucas? I swallow hard, at the fear of this little moment torn apart into pieces.

"What are you thinking about ?" He caresses my back. "Nothing..." I close my eyes and let his scent brush my nostrils. He smells like sandalwood with a touch of citrus tones. I open my eyes and raise my gaze. His pink lips highlighted by his beautiful trimmed moustache seem more appealing and alluring. I raise my face a bit to meet his and capture his lips. You must be mine, I would rather be in denial than let you go without a taste of your love. Your eyes keep me enchanted in your grip, your soft touches when they caress my skin, sending a thousand bolts of current that move my world, your voice that makes my heart skip a bit reminding me how beautiful it is to be loved. I want to stay enamored with you, keep me warm in your embrace. You have ignited hope in me, hope for love. I yearn for more now Lucas, will you be able to handle the intensity of my feelings?

"I think I love you".